Helping ageing parents with love and respect
It’s hard watching your parents lose the skills to take care of themselves. It might start when they need a hand to look after their pool or garden. Then it might come a time when they can’t manage the vacuuming or driving their car.
And while it may be tempting to just step in and do the tasks yourself, or pay someone to do it, there is still a need to respect your elders and not step on their toes. You might also find that their feelings would be hurt if they felt that you were taking over or being condescending.
If you want to help out, there are some more gentle approaches that you can take.
1. Ask first before you help
You could say something like “I’ve been thinking about setting up online shopping for myself, and thought I could get your groceries for you too if you were interested?”
2. Mention a friend in a similar situation
Try something like “Aunty Kath is getting someone in to help her with her garden. Is that something you would be keen to investigate too?”
3. Work together instead of taking over
Try this “Next time I come over, I thought we could sit down and go through all of those bills you need to pay. Perhaps I could help you set up online banking so that you don’t need to go to the post office?”
4. Be available but give space
“I can drop you off to your dental appointment, and then wait for you in the waiting room in case you need me. Maybe we could grab some afternoon tea afterwards?”
Have you got any tips for helping ageing parents in a respectful way? We would love to hear your advice in the comments.