Relationships
What to expect on your first date
Whether you’ve been dipping your toe into the dating pool regularly or it’s your very first time back on the scene, meeting someone new can be nerve wracking at best and terrifying at worst. With increasing numbers of people over 50 getting back into the dating game, it’s fair to assume that you or someone you know may be meeting people that they’ve found online or through mutual acquaintances. Here’s what to expect and how to handle your first date.
- Expect to feel edgy – Meeting someone new may make you feel like a teenager again but try and keep a handle on the jitters. Becoming two overwhelmed with nerves may mean that you either cloud your personality or struggle to pay proper attention to the other person. The best thing you can be is open, honest and yourself. And remember, it’s just a first date, not an arranged marriage.
- Trust your gut – Our instincts are often downplayed when it comes to the dating game. Conventional wisdom suggests we need a number of dates to assess the viability of a relationship. While this may be true for those in their late teens, it discounts experience and that indefinable sense of connection that comes when you meet someone you just click with. Trust your instincts. Likewise, if something feels off, don’t brush that inkling away, it’s probably warning you in advance that you’re better off steering clear.
- Expect and anticipate the truth – It would be short sighted to expect that most of those aged in the 50s and 60s who have re-entered the dating game wouldn’t have some form of baggage. Being open and honest about your past and current circumstances is imperative for starting a relationship on a solid ground of truth.
- Expect (and demand) respect – If you feel as if the person you’re meeting doesn’t quite “get” you or, worse still, is patronising, say sayonara before the second course. There is absolutely excuse for this kind of behaviour and if it’s being exhibited on a first date, it’s a sign of the kind of person you want to avoid.
- Expect to have things in common – While the old adage talks about opposites attracting, research has found that we are much more likely to end up with someone who’s interests, likes and dislikes are similar to our own. Of course some differences are to be expected and should be encouraged as it’ll keep things interesting but similarities in moral code and beliefs helps form a solid foundation.
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