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Former pilot shares tips for fighting jet lag

A former pilot has shared his fool-proof tips for beating jet lag when you’re flying to the other side of the world. As an ex-airline pilot, Jeremy Burfoot knows a thing or two about dealing with dreaded jet lag. After his years flying Qantas planes to every corner of the globe, Captain Burfoot has revealed to <a href="https://travel.nine.com.au/latest/how-to-beat-jet-lag-ex-airline-pilot-shares-hack-for-flights-to-europe/656b0602-9cd2-4923-b3b4-1310a2613235">9Travel</a> the unique way he would combat the condition while he was working. "I used to try and stay in a time zone of where I was living," he told 9Travel. "So I went to London, I would just sleep during the day and go out at night." However, for those who need to be up during usual hours, he advised trying to avoid one thing. "The first day you get there, spend all day in the sun, in the daylight," he says. "Resist having an afternoon nap so you're really tired when you go to bed." Captain Burfoot went on to share his hacks for anyone flying from Australia or New Zealand to Europe, which can be some of the most gruelling flight paths in the world. "If I was planning to go to Europe, I would try to split it into two, try to fly both of the days in the daylight," he said. "You'd want to be on a flight to Singapore out of Australia that leaves in the morning, so you're basically doing a daylight flight to Singapore, then you have an overnight, eat some curry or something.” "And the next day catch a daylight flight to Europe. So it doesn't actually feel like you're up in the middle of the night." Image credits: Captain Jeremy Burfoot

Travel Tips

Fighting for change: how much cash Olympic medallists actually win at Paris 2024

As the world soaks up the glitz and glamour of Paris 2024, athletes are not just eyeing the podium – they're also thinking about the cash they might pocket. Or, in some cases, the cash they might not pocket. Because while the Olympics is a billion-dollar spectacle, the earnings for athletes can range from princely sums to pocket change. Australia: A Gold Medal and a Discount Coupon Let’s start with the Aussies. Winning gold at the Olympics might be the pinnacle of an athlete's career, but for Australian athletes, it also means... $20,000. Yes, you heard that right. In a land where a house deposit will likely cost you a LOT more, Aussie Olympians are basically getting paid in Monopoly money. Silver and bronze medalists get $15,000 and $10,000 respectively. That's enough for a decent holiday, but you might still need a GoFundMe for the flights. Singapore: the million-dollar carrot On the other end of the spectrum, athletes from Singapore are practically diving into pools of gold – like Scrooge McDuck, but in real life. A gold medal will earn them a staggering AU$1.13 million. That’s the kind of money that makes you forget about the gruelling four-year training cycle and instead think about which colour Lamborghini matches your national flag. Hong Kong: fencing your way to riches Hong Kong, not to be outdone, will reward its fencing champion Vivian Kong with AU$1.17 million for her gold. That’s enough to make you consider taking up fencing, even if you’re as coordinated as a baby giraffe. Malaysia and Kazakhstan: cars and apartments In Malaysia, winning athletes might not get cold hard cash, but they do get a new car. And in Kazakhstan, you can literally earn a place to call home – with more rooms depending on the colour of your medal. A gold gets you a penthouse, a silver a two-bedroom, and a bronze... well, maybe a studio with a view of the parking lot. France: host with the most (ish) The host nation, France, offers a more modest reward of $108,000 for a gold medal. That’s enough to cover a year's rent in Paris, or a really good wine collection. But let’s face it, in the land of fine dining, they might just spend it all on cheese. New Zealand, Norway and the UK: the love of the game Athletes from New Zealand, Norway and the UK? Well, they’ll have to make do with a pat on the back and a hearty “well done”, because there’s no financial incentive for winning a medal in these countries. Just the satisfaction of representing your nation, which, as any athlete will tell you, doesn't pay the bills. The United States: the great divide The US offers $37,500 for a gold medal, but that's chump change compared to the endorsement deals top athletes like swimmer Katie Ledecky pull in. She's reportedly earning $1 million a year from swimwear endorsements. Meanwhile, many other American athletes are scraping by, with some earning less than $15,000 a year. That's barely enough for a year's supply of Weet-Bix, let alone world-class training. Jamaica: sharing the love Jamaica’s Olympic team will share a pot of about AU$3,500 each, regardless of their results. It's the ultimate participation trophy – except it’s not enough to buy a trophy, or even a decent pair of running shoes. World Athletics: the global jackpot World Athletics is offering a $3.6 million prize pool for track and field events, with $76,000 per gold medalist. It's a model that some athletes, like Australia’s Arianne Titmus, think other sports should follow. After all, nothing says “thank you for your hard work” like a big, fat cheque. So, whether they’re racing for millions or just a modest thank you, athletes at Paris 2024 will be giving it their all. Because at the end of the day, it's not just about the money. It's about the glory, the honour, and ... well, okay, it’s mostly about the money. Images: Instagram \ Shutterstock

Money & Banking

Nude athletes and fights to the death: what really happened at the ancient Olympics

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/konstantine-panegyres-1528527">Konstantine Panegyres</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/the-university-of-melbourne-722">The University of Melbourne</a> The first recorded victor at the Olympics was <a href="https://anastrophe.uchicago.edu/cgi-bin/perseus/citequery3.pl?dbname=GreekNov21&getid=1&query=Paus.%205.8.8#:%7E:text=This%20I%20can%20prove%3B%20for%20when%20the%20unbroken%20tradition%20of%20the%20Olympiads%20began%20there%20was%20first%20the%20foot%2Drace%2C%20and%20Coroebus%20an%20Elean%20was%20victor.%20There%20is%20no%20statue%20of%20Coroebus%20at%20Olympia%2C%20but%20his%20grave%20is%20on%20the%20borders%20of%20Elis.">Coroebus of Elis</a>. A cook by profession, Coroebus won the event called the “stadion” – a footrace of just under 200 metres, run in a straight line. Coroebus was victorious in the year 776 BC, but this was probably not the year of the first Olympic games. A few ancient writers, such as the historian <a href="https://quod.lib.umich.edu/m/moa/acl3129.0001.001/320">Aristodemus of Elis</a> (who lived in the 2nd century AD or earlier), <a href="https://www.attalus.org/translate/eusebius2.html#:%7E:text=Aristodemus%20of%20Elis,in%20between%20them.">believed</a> there had been as many as 27 Olympic contests prior to 776 BC, but the results had never been recorded because people before that time did not care about recording the names of the winners. The games were held every four years at <a href="https://www.britannica.com/place/Olympia-ancient-site-Greece">Olympia</a>, a site in Western Greece that had a famous temple to the god <a href="https://www.britannica.com/topic/Zeus">Zeus</a>. The games started in mid-August and were part of a religious festival dedicated to Zeus. <figure><iframe src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/VdHHus8IgYA?wmode=transparent&start=25" width="440" height="260" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe><figcaption>The Olympics began as part of a religious festival honouring the Greek god Zeus.</figcaption></figure> <h2>Competing for glory</h2> In the early days of the Olympics, there was only one event (the “<a href="https://www.britannica.com/sports/stade-footrace#:%7E:text=ancient%20Olympic%20Games&text=The%20race%2C%20known%20as%20the,the%20diaulos%2C%20roughly%20similar%20to%E2%80%A6">stadion</a>”) and one victor. Over the centuries, other events were added, like chariot races, wrestling, long-distance running and boxing. The Roman emperor <a href="https://www.britannica.com/biography/Nero-Roman-emperor">Nero</a> (37-68 AD) even “introduced a musical competition at Olympia”, as the biographer <a href="https://www.oxfordreference.com/display/10.1093/acref/9780198606413.001.0001/acref-9780198606413-e-6117">Suetonius</a> (1st/2nd century AD) <a href="https://www.loebclassics.com/view/LCL038/1914/volume.xml">informs</a> us. Victors at Olympia won a wreath of wild olive. Unlike today, there were no prizes for second or third. The athlete <a href="http://www.perseus.tufts.edu/hopper/text?doc=Perseus%3Atext%3A1999.04.0104%3Aalphabetic+letter%3DI%3Aentry+group%3D2%3Aentry%3Diccus-bio-1">Iccus of Tarentum</a>, who lived in the 5th century BC and won victory in the pentathlon at the Olympics of 476 BC, apparently <a href="https://www.loebclassics.com/view/LCL448/1959/volume.xml">said</a> that for him “the prizes meant glory, admiration in his lifetime, and after death an honoured name”. Mostly men competed for the prizes but some women took part. <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/43610326">Cynisca</a>, daughter of King <a href="https://www.britannica.com/biography/Archidamus-II">Archidamus II of Sparta</a>, was the first woman to achieve an Olympic victory. She got the prize because the horses she trained won the chariot racing event in the year 396 BC, as the traveller <a href="https://www.britannica.com/biography/Pausanias-Greek-geographer">Pausanias</a> (2nd century AD) <a href="https://www.loebclassics.com/view/LCL188/1926/volume.xml">writes</a>: <blockquote> Cynisca was exceedingly ambitious to succeed at the Olympic games and was the first woman to breed horses and the first to win an Olympic victory. After Cynisca, other women have won Olympic victories but none of them was more distinguished for their victories than her. </blockquote> But competing in the games could be dangerous. <a href="https://www.oxfordreference.com/display/10.1093/oi/authority.20110803100454522">Lucius Annaeus Seneca</a> (c. 50 BC-c. 40 AD) <a href="https://www.loebclassics.com/view/LCL463/1974/volume.xml">describes</a> how a father lost both sons in the “<a href="https://www.britannica.com/sports/pankration">pancration</a>”, a type of combat sport that was a violent mixture of boxing and wrestling: <blockquote> A man trained his two sons as pancratists, and presented them to compete at the Olympic games. They were paired off to fight each other. The youths were both killed together and had divine honours decreed to them. </blockquote> <h2>Going to the games</h2> People travelled far to see the athletes competing in the famous games. The rhetorician <a href="https://www.oxfordreference.com/display/10.1093/acref/9780198606413.001.0001/acref-9780198606413-e-4094">Menander</a> (3rd/4th century AD) <a href="https://www.loebclassics.com/view/LCL539/2019/volume.xml">said</a> of the Olympic games: “the journey there is very difficult but nevertheless people take the risk”. In 44 BC, the Roman statesman <a href="https://www.britannica.com/biography/Cicero">Cicero</a> (106-43 BC) <a href="https://books.google.com.au/books?id=BzJsGtpNTwMC&pg=PA125&dq=%22A+winter+voyage+is+disagreeable,+and+that+is+why+I+asked+you%22&hl=en&newbks=1&newbks_redir=0&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjd5ca9m62HAxXKSWwGHf13DPEQ6AF6BAgKEAI#v=onepage&q=%22A%20winter%20voyage%20is%20disagreeable%2C%20and%20that%20is%20why%20I%20asked%20you%22&f=false">wrote</a> a letter to his friend Atticus about planning a trip to Greece to see the games: <blockquote> I should like to know the date of the Olympic games […] of course, as you say, the plan of my trip will depend on chance. </blockquote> Cicero never made it to the Olympics – he was interrupted by other business. If he had gone, the trip would have involved a voyage by sea from Italy to Greece, then a carriage ride to Olympia. Once at Olympia, travellers stayed at lodging houses with other travellers. There they mixed with strangers and made new friends. There is a famous story about what happened when the philosopher <a href="https://www.britannica.com/biography/Plato">Plato</a> (428/427-348/347 BC) stayed at Olympia for the games. Plato lived there with others who did not realise he was the celebrated philosopher and he made a good impression on them, as the Roman writer <a href="https://www.britannica.com/biography/Aelian#:%7E:text=Aelian%20(born%20c.,%22Honey%2Dtongued%22).">Claudius Aelian</a> (2nd/3rd century AD) <a href="https://www.loebclassics.com/view/LCL486/1997/volume.xml">recalled</a>: <blockquote> The strangers were delighted by their chance encounter […] he had behaved towards them with modesty and simplicity and had proved himself able to win the confidence of anyone in his company. </blockquote> Later on, Plato invited his new friends to Athens and they were amazed to find out he was in fact the famous philosopher who was the student of <a href="https://www.britannica.com/biography/Socrates">Socrates</a>. It’s unclear how many people actually visited the ancient games each time they were held, although some modern scholars <a href="https://olympics.com/ioc/ancient-olympic-games/spectators">think</a> the number could have been as high as 50,000 in some years. <h2>Watching the games</h2> The Greek writer <a href="https://www.britannica.com/biography/Chariton-Greek-author">Chariton</a> (1st century AD) in his novel Callirhoe <a href="https://www.loebclassics.com/view/LCL481/1995/volume.xml">wrote</a> how athletes – who had often also made a long journey to get to the games – arrived at Olympia “with an escort of their supporters”. Athletes competed naked, and women were usually not permitted to watch. But there were some exceptions. For example a woman called Pherenice, who lived in the 4th century BC, was permitted to attend the Olympics as a spectator. As Claudius Aelian <a href="https://www.loebclassics.com/view/LCL486/1997/volume.xml">explains</a>: <blockquote> Pherenice brought her son to the Olympic festival to compete. The presiding officials refused to admit her as a spectator but she spoke in public and justified her request by pointing out that her father and three brothers were Olympic victors, and she was bringing a son who was a competitor. She won over the assembly and she attended the Olympic festival. </blockquote> As the contest was held in the middle of summer, it was usually extremely hot. According to Claudius Aelian, some people <a href="https://www.loebclassics.com/view/LCL486/1997/volume.xml">thought</a> watching the Olympics under “the baking heat of the sun” was a “much more severe penalty” than having to do manual labour such as grinding grain. The site at Olympia also had problems with freshwater supply. According to the writer <a href="https://www.britannica.com/biography/Lucian">Lucian of Samosata</a> (2nd century AD), visitors to the games sometimes <a href="https://www.tertullian.org/rpearse/lucian/peregrinus.htm#:%7E:text=Coming%20at%20last,that%20same%20water!">died of thirst</a>. This problem was fixed when <a href="https://www.britannica.com/biography/Herodes-Atticus">Herodes Atticus</a> built an <a href="http://www.perseus.tufts.edu/hopper/artifact?name=Olympia%2C+Nymphaeum&object=Building">aqueduct</a> to the site in the middle of the 2nd century AD. The atmosphere of the crowd was electric. The Athenian general and politician <a href="https://penelope.uchicago.edu/Thayer/E/Roman/Texts/Plutarch/Lives/Themistocles*.html">Themistocles</a> (6th/5th century BC) apparently <a href="https://www.loebclassics.com/view/LCL486/1997/volume.xml">said</a> the most enjoyable moment of his life was “to see the public at Olympia turning to look at me as I entered the stadium”. They praised him when he visited the games at Olympia because of his recent victory against the Persians at the <a href="https://www.britannica.com/event/Battle-of-Salamis">battle of Salamis</a> (480 BC). When the games were over, winning athletes returned home to a hero’s welcome. According to Claudius Aelian, when the athlete <a href="https://ia801308.us.archive.org/18/items/PWRE09-10/Pauly-Wissowa_V1_1151.png">Dioxippus</a> (4th century BC) <a href="https://www.loebclassics.com/view/LCL486/1997/volume.xml">returned to Athens</a> after being victorious in the pancration at Olympia, “a crowd collected from all directions” in the city to celebrate him. <h2>The end of the ancient games</h2> The Roman historian <a href="https://www.oxfordreference.com/display/10.1093/oi/authority.20110803115406219">Velleius Paterculus</a> (born 20/19 BC) <a href="https://www.loebclassics.com/view/LCL152/1924/volume.xml">called</a> the Olympic games “the most celebrated of all contests in sports”. Current research <a href="https://www.cambridge.org/core/books/end-of-greek-athletics-in-late-antiquity/DF60B2B859B4F1A7FE7549B17B61E9A1">suggests</a> the ancient games probably ended in the reign of the Roman emperor Theodosius II (reigned 408-450 AD). There may have been a number of reasons for the demise but some ancient sources specifically <a href="http://ancientolympics.arts.kuleuven.be/sourceEN/D219EN.html#:%7E:text=Scholia%20in%20Lucianum%2041.9.42%2D46%3A%0AThe%20Olympic%20games%20%C3%AF%C2%BF%C2%BD%20existed%20for%20a%20long%20time%20until%20Theodosius%20the%20younger%2C%20who%20was%20the%20son%20of%20Arcadius.%20After%20the%20temple%20of%20Olympian%20Zeus%20had%20been%20burnt%20down%2C%20the%20festival%20of%20the%20Eleans%20and%20Olympic%20contest%20were%20abandoned.">say</a> it was caused by a fire that destroyed the temple of Zeus at Olympia during Theodosius II’s reign: <blockquote> After the temple of Olympian Zeus had been burnt down, the festival of the Eleans and the Olympic contest were abandoned. </blockquote> The Olympics were not revived again until 1896, the year of the first <a href="https://olympics.com/en/olympic-games/athens-1896">modern Olympics</a>.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/234912/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/konstantine-panegyres-1528527">Konstantine Panegyres</a>, McKenzie Postdoctoral Fellow, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/the-university-of-melbourne-722">The University of Melbourne</a> Image: Shutterstock This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/nude-athletes-and-fights-to-the-death-what-really-happened-at-the-ancient-olympics-234912">original article</a>.

International Travel

Riley Keough fights Graceland foreclosure sale

Elvis Presley's granddaughter Riley Keough has taken legal action against a company's plan to publicly auction Graceland estate in Memphis county, after she accused them of providing "fraudulent" documents. A public notice for a foreclosure sale of the 13-acre estate was posted in early May said that Promenade Trust, the company which controls the Graceland museum, owed $US3.8 million ($5.7 million) after failing to repay a 2018 loan. Keough's late mother, Lisa Marie Presley, allegedly signed the deed of trust and used Graceland as collateral. Naussany Investments and Private Lending, a Missouri-based company who managed the loan, claims that Lisa Marie failed to repay the loan. A public auction for the estate had been scheduled for Thursday this week, but a judge has blocked the sale after Keough sought a temporary restraining order and filed a lawsuit. In the lawsuit, Keough asserts that her mother never borrowed any money, and alleged that Lisa Marie’s signatures were forged and that Naussany Investments isn’t even a legitimate company. "Lisa Maria Presley never borrowed money from Naussany Investments and never gave a deed of trust to Naussany Investments," Keough's lawyer wrote in a lawsuit. “These documents are fraudulent. “Furthermore, the notary listed on the documents denies notarising Lisa Marie’s signature or ever meeting her.” A source told The New York Post that Keough is “traumatised” at what has unfolded and “never thought that a historic piece of property could even be considered to go into the hands of any random stranger”. An injunction hearing is set for Wednesday. Elvis bought the Graceland estate in 1957. After his death in 1977, his daughter Lisa Marie Presley inherited it and opened it up as a public museum five years later. After her death last year, her daughter Riley Keough became the heir. Image: Carl Timpone/BFA.com/ Shutterstock Editorial

Legal

Stuck in fight-or-flight mode? 5 ways to complete the ‘stress cycle’ and avoid burnout or depression

<div class="theconversation-article-body"> Can you remember a time when you felt stressed leading up to a big life event and then afterwards felt like a weight had been lifted? This process – the ramping up of the stress response and then feeling this settle back down – shows completion of the “stress cycle”. Some stress in daily life is unavoidable. But remaining stressed is unhealthy. <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2568977/">Chronic stress</a> increases <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32886587/">chronic health conditions</a>, including heart disease and stroke and diabetes. It can also lead to <a href="https://theconversation.com/were-all-exhausted-but-are-you-experiencing-burnout-heres-what-to-look-out-for-164393">burnout</a> or <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5137920/">depression</a>. Exercise, cognitive, creative, social and self-soothing activities help us process stress in healthier ways and complete the stress cycle. <h2>What does the stress cycle look like?</h2> Scientists and researchers refer to the “stress response”, often with a focus on the fight-or-flight reactions. The phrase the “stress cycle” has been made popular by <a href="https://www.penguin.co.uk/articles/2019/03/complete-stress-cycle-emotional-exhaustion-burnout">self-help experts</a> but it does have a scientific basis. The <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK541120/">stress cycle</a> is our body’s response to a stressful event, whether real or perceived, physical or psychological. It could be being chased by a vicious dog, an upcoming exam or a difficult conversation. The stress cycle has three stages: <ul> <li> stage 1 is perceiving the threat </li> <li> stage 2 is the fight-or-flight response, driven by our stress hormones: adrenaline and cortisol </li> <li> stage 3 is relief, including physiological and psychological relief. This completes the stress cycle. </li> </ul> Different people will respond to stress differently based on their life experiences and <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3181835/#:%7E:text=The%20major%20findings%20regarding%20the,renin%2Dangiotensin%2Daldosterone%20system%20or">genetics</a>. Unfortunately, many people experience <a href="https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2023/01/polycrisis-global-risks-report-cost-of-living/">multiple and ongoing stressors</a> out of their control, including the cost-of-living crisis, extreme weather events and <a href="https://www.aihw.gov.au/family-domestic-and-sexual-violence/types-of-violence/family-domestic-violence">domestic violence</a>. Remaining in stage 2 (the flight-or-flight response), can lead to chronic stress. <a href="https://theconversation.com/how-chronic-stress-changes-the-brain-and-what-you-can-do-to-reverse-the-damage-133194">Chronic stress</a> and high cortisol can increase <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5476783/">inflammation</a>, which damages our brain and other organs. When you are stuck in chronic fight-or-flight mode, you don’t think clearly and are more easily distracted. Activities that provide temporary pleasure, such as eating junk food or drinking alcohol are <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/acer.14518">unhelpful strategies</a> that do not reduce the stress effects on our brain and body. Scrolling through social media is also not an effective way to complete the stress cycle. In fact, this is associated with an <a href="https://www.apa.org/monitor/2022/11/strain-media-overload">increased stress response</a>. <h2>Stress and the brain</h2> In the brain, chronic high cortisol can <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4561403/">shrink the hippocampus</a>. This can <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1557684/#:%7E:text=The%20hippocampal%20formation%20plays%20a,%2C%20memory%2C%20motivation%20and%20emotion.&text=Therefore%2C%20reduced%20hippocampal%20volumes%20should,in%20patients%20with%20major%20depression">impair a person’s memory</a> and their capacity to think and concentrate. Chronic high cortisol also <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2907136/#:%7E:text=The%20prefrontal%20cortex%20(PFC)%20intelligently,brain%20regions%20(BOX%201).">reduces activity</a> in the prefrontal cortex but <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2352289514000101">increases activity</a> in the amygdala. The prefrontal cortex is responsible for higher-order control of our thoughts, behaviours and emotions, and is <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychology/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2014.00761/full">goal-directed</a> and rational. The amygdala is involved in reflexive and emotional responses. Higher amygdala activity and lower prefrontal cortex activity explains why we are less rational and more emotional and reactive when we are stressed. There are five <a href="https://www.penguin.co.uk/articles/2019/03/complete-stress-cycle-emotional-exhaustion-burnout">types of activities</a> that can help our brains complete the stress cycle. <figure><iframe src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/eD1wliuHxHI?wmode=transparent&start=0" width="440" height="260" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe><figcaption>It can help to understand how the brain encounters stress.</figcaption></figure> <h2>1. Exercise – its own complete stress cycle</h2> When we exercise we get a short-term spike in cortisol, followed by a <a href="https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/exercising-to-relax">healthy reduction</a> in cortisol and adrenaline. Exercise also <a href="https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/exercise-and-stress/art-20044469#:%7E:text=Exercise%20in%20almost%20any%20form,distract%20you%20from%20daily%20worries.&text=You%20know%20that%20exercise%20does,fit%20it%20into%20your%20routine.">increases endorphins and serotonin</a>, which improve mood. Endorphins cause an elated feeling often called “runner’s high” and have <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/33396962/">anti-inflammatory effects</a>. When you exercise, there is more blood flow to the brain and <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6721405/">higher activity</a> in the prefrontal cortex. This is why you can often think more clearly after a walk or run. Exercise can be a helpful way to <a href="https://www.healthline.com/health/heart-disease/exercise-stress-relief">relieve feelings of stress</a>. Exercise can also increase the <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3041121/">volume</a> of the <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4915811/">hippocampus</a>. This is linked to better short-term and long-term memory processing, as well as reduced stress, depression and anxiety. <h2>2. Cognitive activities – reduce negative thinking</h2> Overly negative thinking can trigger or extend the stress response. In our 2019 research, we found the relationship between stress and cortisol was <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6987429/">stronger in people with more negative thinking</a>. Higher amygdala activity and less rational thinking when you are stressed can lead to <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/18628348/">distorted thinking</a> such as focusing on negatives and rigid “black-and-white” thinking. Activities to reduce negative thinking and promote a more realistic view can reduce the stress response. In clinical settings this is usually called <a href="https://www.healthdirect.gov.au/cognitive-behaviour-therapy-cbt">cognitive behaviour therapy</a>. At home, this could be journalling or writing down worries. This engages the logical and rational parts of our brain and helps us think more realistically. Finding evidence to challenge negative thoughts (“I’ve prepared well for the exam, so I can do my best”) can help to complete the stress cycle. <h2>3. Getting creative – a pathway out of ‘flight or fight’</h2> Creative activities can be art, craft, gardening, cooking or <a href="https://heartmindonline.org/resources/10-exercises-for-your-prefrontal-cortex">other activities</a> such as doing a puzzle, juggling, music, theatre, dancing or simply being absorbed in enjoyable work. Such pursuits increase <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychology/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2014.00761/full">prefrontal cortex activity</a> and promote flow and focus. Flow is a <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychology/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2021.645498/full">state of full engagement</a> in an activity you enjoy. It lowers high-stress levels of noradrenaline, the brain’s adrenaline. When you are focussed like this, the brain only processes information relevant to the task and ignores non-relevant information, including stresses. <h2>4. Getting social and releasing feel-good hormones</h2> Talking with someone else, physical affection with a person or pet and laughing can all <a href="https://theconversation.com/what-happens-in-our-brain-and-body-when-were-in-love-198885">increase oxytocin</a>. This is a chemical messenger in the brain that increases social bonding and makes us feel connected and safe. Laughing is also a social activity that <a href="https://neurosciencenews.com/laughter-physical-mental-psychology-17339/">activates parts</a> of the limbic system – the part of the brain involved in emotional and behavioural responses. This increases <a href="https://www.jneurosci.org/content/37/36/8581">endorphins</a> and <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/27439375/">serotonin</a> and improves our mood. <h2>5. Self-soothing</h2> Breathing <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6189422/">exercises</a> and meditation stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system (which calms down our stress responses so we can “reset”) via the <a href="https://theconversation.com/our-vagus-nerves-help-us-rest-digest-and-restore-can-you-really-reset-them-to-feel-better-210469">vagus nerves</a>, and <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/17437199.2020.1760727">reduce cortisol</a>. A good <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4035568/#:%7E:text=We%20conclude%20that%2C%20in%20addition,self%2Dsoothing%20effects%20of%20crying.">cry can help too</a> by releasing stress energy and increasing oxytocin and endorphins. <a href="https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/319631#:%7E:text=Possible%20benefits%20of%20crying%20include,of%201.9%20times%20a%20month.">Emotional tears</a> also remove cortisol and the hormone prolactin from the body. Our prior research showed <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29096223/">cortisol</a> and <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC9216608/">prolactin</a> were associated with depression, anxiety and hostility.<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/theresa-larkin-952095">Theresa Larkin</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-wollongong-711">University of Wollongong</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/susan-j-thomas-1293985">Susan J. Thomas</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-wollongong-711">University of Wollongong</a> <h2>Action beats distraction</h2> Whether it’s watching a funny or sad movie, exercising, journalling, gardening or doing a puzzle, there is science behind why you should complete the stress cycle. Doing at least one positive activity every day can also reduce our baseline stress level and is beneficial for good mental health and wellbeing. Importantly, chronic stress and <a href="https://theconversation.com/are-you-burnt-out-at-work-ask-yourself-these-4-questions-118128">burnout</a> can also indicate the need for change, <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1002/wps.20311">such as in our workplaces</a>. However, not all stressful circumstances can be easily changed. Remember help is always available. If you have concerns about your stress or health, please talk to a doctor. If this article has raised issues for you, or if you’re concerned about someone you know, call <a href="https://www.lifeline.org.au/">Lifeline</a> on 13 11 14 or <a href="https://kidshelpline.com.au/">Kids Helpline</a> on 1800 55 1800.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/218599/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/theresa-larkin-952095">Theresa Larkin</a>, Associate professor of Medical Sciences, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-wollongong-711">University of Wollongong</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/susan-j-thomas-1293985">Susan J. Thomas</a>, Associate professor in Mental Health and Behavioural Science, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-wollongong-711">University of Wollongong</a> Image credits: Getty Images This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/stuck-in-fight-or-flight-mode-5-ways-to-complete-the-stress-cycle-and-avoid-burnout-or-depression-218599">original article</a>. </div>

Mind

Do you really need antibiotics? Curbing our use helps fight drug-resistant bacteria

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/minyon-avent-1486987">Minyon Avent</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/the-university-of-queensland-805">The University of Queensland</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/fiona-doukas-1157050">Fiona Doukas</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/kristin-xenos-1491653">Kristin Xenos</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-newcastle-1060">University of Newcastle</a> Antibiotic resistance occurs when a microorganism changes and no longer responds to an antibiotic that was previously effective. It’s <a href="https://thelancet.com/journals/eclinm/article/PIIS2589-5370(21)00502-2/fulltext">associated with</a> poorer outcomes, a greater chance of death and higher health-care costs. In Australia, antibiotic resistance means some patients are admitted to hospital because oral antibiotics are <a href="https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/antibiotic-resistance">no longer effective</a> and they need to receive intravenous therapy via a drip. Antibiotic resistance is rising to high levels in certain parts of the world. Some hospitals <a href="https://www.reactgroup.org/news-and-views/news-and-opinions/year-2022/the-impact-of-antibiotic-resistance-on-cancer-treatment-especially-in-low-and-middle-income-countries-and-the-way-forward/">have to consider</a> whether it’s even viable to treat cancers or perform surgery due to the risk of antibiotic-resistant infections. Australia is <a href="https://www.safetyandquality.gov.au/our-work/antimicrobial-resistance/antimicrobial-use-and-resistance-australia-aura/aura-2023-fifth-australian-report-antimicrobial-use-and-resistance-human-health">one of the highest users</a> of antibiotics in the developed world. We need to use this precious resource wisely, or we risk a future where a simple infection could kill you because there isn’t an effective antibiotic. <h2>When should antibiotics not be used?</h2> Antibiotics only work for some infections. They work against bacteria but <a href="https://www.safetyandquality.gov.au/publications-and-resources/resource-library/do-i-really-need-antibiotics">don’t treat</a> infections caused by viruses. Most community acquired infections, even those caused by bacteria, are likely to get better without antibiotics. Taking an antibiotic when you don’t need it won’t make you feel better or recover sooner. But it can increase your chance of side effects like nausea and diarrhoea. Some people think green mucus (or snot) is a sign of bacterial infection, requiring antibiotics. But it’s actually <a href="https://www.safetyandquality.gov.au/sites/default/files/2023-11/aura_2023_do_i_really_need_antibiotics.pdf">a sign</a> your immune system is working to fight your infection. <h2>If you wait, you’ll often get better</h2> <a href="https://www.tg.org.au/">Clinical practice guidelines</a> for antibiotic use aim to ensure patients receive antibiotics when appropriate. Yet 40% of GPs say they prescribe antibiotics <a href="https://doi.org/10.1071/HI13019">to meet patient expectations</a>. And <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35973750/">one in five</a> patients expect antibiotics for respiratory infections. It can be difficult for doctors to decide if a patient has a viral respiratory infection or are at an early stage of serious bacterial infection, particularly in children. One option is to “watch and wait” and ask patients to return if there is clinical deterioration. An alternative is to prescribe an antibiotic but advise the patient to not have it dispensed unless specific symptoms occur. This can <a href="https://doi.org/10.1002/14651858.CD004417.pub5">reduce antibiotic use by 50%</a> with no decrease in patient satisfaction, and no increase in complication rates. <h2>Sometimes antibiotics are life-savers</h2> For some people – particularly those with a weakened immune system – a simple infection can become more serious. Patients with life-threatening suspected infections should receive an appropriate antibiotic <a href="https://www.safetyandquality.gov.au/our-work/clinical-care-standards/antimicrobial-stewardship-clinical-care-standard">immediately</a>. This includes serious infections such as <a href="https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/conditions-and-diseases/bacterial-meningitis#:%7E:text=What%20is%20bacterial%20meningitis%3F,can%20cause%20life%2Dthreatening%20problems.">bacterial meningitis</a> (infection of the membranes surrounding the brain) and <a href="https://clinicalexcellence.qld.gov.au/priority-areas/safety-and-quality/sepsis/adult-sepsis#:%7E:text=Adult%20patients%20with%20sepsis%20also,adult%20emergency%20department%20sepsis%20pathway.">sepsis</a> (which can lead to organ failure and even death). <h2>When else might antibiotics be used?</h2> Antibiotics are sometimes used to prevent infections in patients who are undergoing surgery and are at significant risk of infection, such as those undergoing bowel resection. These patients will <a href="https://www.tg.org.au">generally receive</a> a single dose before the procedure. Antibiotics may also <a href="https://www.tg.org.au">be given</a> to patients undergoing chemotherapy for solid organ cancers (of the breast or prostate, for example), if they are at high risk of infection. While most sore throats are caused by a virus and usually resolve on their own, some high risk patients with a bacterial strep A infection which can cause “scarlet fever” are given antibiotics to prevent a more serious infection like <a href="https://www.rhdaustralia.org.au/">acute rheumatic fever</a>. <h2>How long is a course of antibiotics?</h2> The recommended duration of a course of antibiotics depends on the type of infection, the likely cause, where it is in your body and how effective the antibiotics are at killing the bacteria. In the past, courses were largely arbitrary and based on assumptions that antibiotics should be taken for long enough to eliminate the infecting bacteria. More recent research does not support this and shorter courses are <a href="https://www.acpjournals.org/doi/full/10.7326/M19-1509">nearly always as effective as longer ones</a>, particularly for community acquired respiratory infections. For <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6736742/">community acquired pneumonia</a>, for example, research shows a three- to five-day course of antibiotics is at least as effective as a seven- to 14-day course. The “take until all finished” approach is no longer recommended, as the longer the antibiotic exposure, the greater the chance the bacteria will develop resistance. However, for infections where it is more difficult to eradicate the bacteria, such as tuberculosis and bone infections, a combination of antibiotics for many months is usually required. <h2>What if your infection is drug-resistant?</h2> You may have an antibiotic-resistant infection if you don’t get better after treatment with standard antibiotics. Your clinician will collect samples for lab testing if they suspect you have antibiotic-resistant infection, based on your travel history (especially if you’ve been hospitalised in a country with high rates of antibiotic resistance) and if you’ve had a recent course of antibiotics that hasn’t cleared your infection. Antibiotic-resistant infections are managed by prescribing broad-spectrum antibiotics. These are like a sledgehammer, wiping out many different species of bacteria. (Narrow-spectrum antibiotics conversely can be thought of as a scalpel, more targeted and only affecting one or two kinds of bacteria.) Broad-spectrum antibiotics are usually more expensive and come with more severe side effects. <h2>What can patients do?</h2> Decisions about antibiotic prescriptions should be made using <a href="https://www.safetyandquality.gov.au/our-work/partnering-consumers/shared-decision-making/decision-support-tools-specific-conditions">shared decision aids</a>, where patients and prescribers discuss the risks and benefits of antibiotics for conditions like a sore throat, middle ear infection or acute bronchitis. Consider asking your doctor questions such as: <ul> <li>do we need to test the cause of my infection?</li> <li>how long should my recovery take?</li> <li>what are the risks and benefits of me taking antibiotics?</li> <li>will the antibiotic affect my regular medicines?</li> <li>how should I take the antibiotic (how often, for how long)?</li> </ul> Other ways to fight antibiotic resistance include: <ul> <li>returning leftover antibiotics to a pharmacy for safe disposal</li> <li>never consuming leftover antibiotics or giving them to anyone else</li> <li>not keeping prescription repeats for antibiotics “in case” you become sick again</li> <li>asking your doctor or pharmacist what you can do to feel better and ease your symptoms rather than asking for antibiotics.</li> </ul> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/minyon-avent-1486987">Minyon Avent</a>, Antimicrobial Stewardship Pharmacist, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/the-university-of-queensland-805">The University of Queensland</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/fiona-doukas-1157050">Fiona Doukas</a>, PhD candidate, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/kristin-xenos-1491653">Kristin Xenos</a>, Research Assistant, College of Health, Medicine and Wellbeing, School of Biomedical Science and Pharmacy, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-newcastle-1060">University of Newcastle</a> Image credits: Shutterstock This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/do-you-really-need-antibiotics-curbing-our-use-helps-fight-drug-resistant-bacteria-217920">original article</a>.

Body

Olympic hero "fighting for her life" in intensive care

xxIn the world of gymnastics, few names shine as brightly as that of Mary Lou Retton. The Olympic gold medallist and legendary American gymnast has long been celebrated for her incredible contributions to the sport, etching her legacy into the annals of history. But now, a dark cloud of concern hovers over this American icon, as she battles a rare and relentless adversary: a severe form of pneumonia. The shocking news has shaken the hearts of fans and sports enthusiasts worldwide, as the daughter of the 55-year-old Retton shared the news that she is "fighting for her life" in an intensive care unit, unable to breathe on her own for over a week now. McKenna Kelley, Retton's daughter, recently set up a <a href="https://www.spotfund.com/story/a2e0582c-e62f-4e5b-a586-18349014f761" target="_blank" rel="noopener">fundraising account</a> to share her mother's grave situation and the urgency of her need for support. The emotional plea disclosed that Mary Lou Retton was uninsured, leaving the burden of her healthcare costs in the hands of her loved ones and well-wishers. In an emotionally charged post on the fundraising platform, Kelley wrote: "My amazing mom, Mary Lou, has a very rare form of pneumonia and is fighting for her life." While respecting her mother's privacy, Kelley refrained from divulging further details about the nature of the pneumonia that has gripped Retton's life, instead requesting the one thing we can all offer – our prayers. Mary Lou Retton's remarkable gymnastics career needs no introduction. She etched her name into the annals of history during the 1984 Los Angeles Olympics, securing her place as one of the greatest gymnasts in history. At those Summer Games, Retton achieved an astonishing feat by winning five medals, including a groundbreaking gold in the individual all-around competition, a first for any American woman. Her achievements garnered her the title of Sportsperson of the Year by Sports Illustrated in 1984, a testament to her indomitable spirit and unparalleled dedication to her craft. At the time of writing, the fundraising account dedicated to supporting Mary Lou Retton had received an overwhelming outpouring of love and support. With more than 2,000 donors and counting, the campaign has already raised over $US300,000, surpassing its original goal of $US50,000. The outpouring of generosity underscores the enduring impact and admiration that Mary Lou Retton has left in the hearts of many. Beyond the gymnasium, Retton's influence extended into the world of entertainment, appearing in movies and TV shows, including a memorable stint on Baywatch in 1993 and the film Naked Gun 33 ¹/₃: The Final Insult in 1994. She also served on the President's Council on Physical Fitness and Sports during President George W. Bush's administration, underscoring her enduring commitment to promoting physical health and well-being. In recognition of her remarkable contributions to the world of gymnastics, Mary Lou Retton was inducted into the International Gymnastics Hall of Fame in 1997 and became the first woman to be honored by the Houston Sports Hall of Fame in 2020. Her legacy extended to the National Italian-American Sports Hall of Fame, inducted in 1992, and in her hometown of Fairmont, West Virginia, a street and park bear her name, a lasting tribute to her enduring impact. Images: Instagram

Caring

“Dig a hole in my chest”: Supermodel reveals double cancer fight

Supermodel icon Linda Evangelista has shared the devastating details of her cancer battle, after being diagnosed twice in five years. In a candid interview with <a href="https://www.wsj.com/style/fashion/linda-evangelista-steven-meisel-32909b7b?mod=style_lead_story" target="_blank" rel="noopener">WSJ magazine</a>, the 58-year-old revealed why she chose to "keep it quiet" and only tell a handful of people close to her about her health battle. Evangelista was first diagnosed with breast cancer in 2018 after a routine mammogram, and decided to undergo a bilateral mastectomy: a surgical procedure to remove both breasts. "The margins were not good. [I chose this treatment] due to other health factors, without hesitation, because I wanted to put everything behind me and not to have to deal with this. "Thinking I was good and set for life. Breast cancer was not going to kill me." Four years later in 2022, Evangelista felt a lump on her chest and an MRI revealed cancer was present in her pectoral muscle. "I just went into this mode that I know how to do – just do what you've got to do and get through it," she said. "And that's what I did." "Dig a hole in my chest," she recalled telling her doctors. "I don't want it to look pretty. I want you to excavate. I want to see a hole in my chest when you're done. Do you understand me? I'm not dying from this." After another round of surgery, she was told the outlook was good for the future, but there is always a possibility the cancer could return. "Well, once it's come back, there's a chance," she recalled the oncologist's words. "I know I have one foot in the grave, but I'm totally in celebration mode." Image credits: Instagram / Getty Images

Caring

"Finally a celebrity fighting back": Cardi B hurls mic at concert goer

The latest celebrity to be hit with something on stage has fought back, as Cardi B took revenge on the concert goer who threw a drink over her during a performance. The rapper, 30, was performing in Las Vegas on Saturday, as she sang her 2018 song, Bodak Yellow, that propelled her to global fame. During the song, a member of the audience threw their drink on stage, splashing the singer in the liquid. Cardi B immediately retaliated by lobbing her microphone into the crowd, targeting the audience member. The fan was led out of the crowd by security, while the performer took the time to casually fix up her hair before continuing her performance. <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> Cardi B throws microphone at audience member who threw a drink at her. <a href="https://t.co/alLgHMFshb">pic.twitter.com/alLgHMFshb</a> — Pop Base (@PopBase) <a href="https://twitter.com/PopBase/status/1685461526646525952?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 30, 2023</a></blockquote> The confrontation, which was filmed by many fellow concert goers, has since gone viral, with many commending the artist for fighting back. "Finally a celebrity fighting back," said one. "Exactly, it's about time a performer retaliated to this 'trend'," another agreed. "She did what needed to be done! People need to stop throwing stuff at performers," added another fan. The incident in Vegas was the second time in just 24 hours that the singer was captured on video hurling a microphone at inconsiderate fans. The singer was performing at another club in Las Vegas the night before, when the DJ in control of her music kept cutting out the track as she was trying to sing. After the song stopping and starting abruptly several times, Cardi B yelled out her own name before spinning around and aiming the microphone at the DJ before storming off the stage. Image credits: Twitter

Music

What happens in our body when we encounter and fight off a virus like the flu, SARS-CoV-2 or RSV?

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lara-herrero-1166059">Lara Herrero</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/griffith-university-828">Griffith University</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/wesley-freppel-1408971">Wesley Freppel</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/griffith-university-828">Griffith University</a> <a href="https://www.labcorp.com/coronavirus-disease-covid-19/covid-news-education/covid-19-vs-flu-vs-rsv-how-tell-difference">Respiratory viruses</a> like influenza virus (flu), SARS-CoV-2 (which causes COVID) and respiratory syncytial virus (RSV) can make us sick by infecting our respiratory system, including the nose, upper airways and lungs. They spread from person to person through respiratory droplets when someone coughs, sneezes, or talks and can cause death in serious cases. But what happens in our body when we first encounter these viruses? Our immune system uses a number of strategies to fight off viral infections. Let’s look at how it does this. <h2>First line of defence</h2> When we encounter respiratory viruses, the <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S193131281600038X?via%3Dihub/">first line of defence</a> is the physical and chemical barriers in our nose, upper airways, and lungs. Barriers like the mucus lining and hair-like structures on the surface of cells, work together to trap and remove viruses before they can reach deeper into our respiratory system. Our defence also includes our behaviours such as coughing or sneezing. When we blow our nose, the mucus, viruses, and any other pathogens that are caught within it are expelled. But sometimes, viruses manage to evade these initial barriers and sneak into our respiratory system. This activates the cells of our innate immune system. <h2>Patrolling for potential invaders</h2> While our acquired immune system develops over time, our innate immune system is present at birth. It generates “non-specific” immunity by identifying what’s foreign. The cells of innate immunity act like a patrol system, searching for any invaders. These innate cells patrol almost every part of our body, from our skin to our nose, lungs and even internal organs. Our respiratory system has different type of innate cells such – as macrophages, neutrophils and natural killer cells – which patrol in our body looking for intruders. If they recognise anything foreign, in this case a virus, they will initiate an attack response. Each cell type plays a slightly different role. Macrophages, for example, will not only engulf and digest viruses (phagocytosis) but also release a cocktail of different molecules (cytokines) that will warn and recruit other cells to <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/cmi.12580">fight against the danger</a>. In the meantime, natural killer cells, aptly named, attack infected cells, and stop viruses from multiplying and <a href="https://www.nature.com/articles/s41577-021-00558-3">invading our body further</a>. Natural killer cells also promote inflammation, a <a href="https://www.hindawi.com/journals/jir/2018/1467538/">crucial part of the immune response</a>. It helps to recruit more immune cells to the site of infection, enhances blood flow, and increases the permeability of blood vessels, allowing immune cells to reach the infected tissues. At this stage, our immune system is fighting a war against viruses and the result can cause inflammation, fevers, coughs and congestion. <h2>Launching a specific attack</h2> As the innate immune response begins, another branch of the immune system called the adaptive immune system is <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK21070/">activated</a>. The adaptive immune system is more specific than the innate immune system, and it decides on the correct tools and strategy to fight off the viral invaders. This system plays a vital role in eliminating the virus and providing long-term protection against future infections. Specialised cells called T cells and B cells are key players in acquired immunity. T cells (specifically, helper T cells and cytotoxic T cells) recognise viral proteins on the surface of infected cells: <ul> <li> helper T cells release molecules that <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3764486/">further activate immune cells</a> </li> <li> cytotoxic T cells directly kill infected cells with a very great precision, <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fimmu.2018.00678/full">avoiding any healthy cells around</a>. </li> </ul> B cells produce antibodies, which are proteins that can bind to viruses, neutralise them, and mark them for <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7247032/">destruction by other immune cells</a>. B cells are a critical part of memory in our immune system. They will remember what happened and won’t forget for years. When the same virus attacks again, B cells will be ready to fight it off and will neutralise it faster and better. Thanks to the adaptive immune system, vaccines for respiratory viruses such as the COVID mRNA vaccine keep us protected from <a href="https://www.health.gov.au/our-work/covid-19-vaccines/our-vaccines/how-they-work">being sick or severely ill</a>. However, if the same virus became mutated, our immune system will act as if it was a new virus and will have to fight in a war again. <h2>Neutralising the threat</h2> As the immune response progresses, the combined efforts of the innate and adaptive immune systems helps control the virus. Infected cells are cleared, and the virus is neutralised and eliminated from the body. As the infection subsides, symptoms gradually improve, and we begin to feel better and to recover. But recovery varies depending on the specific virus and us as individuals. Some respiratory viruses, like rhinoviruses which cause the common cold, may cause relatively mild symptoms and a quick recovery. Others, like the flu, SARS-CoV-2 or severe cases of RSV, may lead to more severe symptoms and a longer recovery time. Some viruses are very strong and too fast sometimes so that our immune system does not have the time to develop a proper immune response to fight them off. <img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/207023/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lara-herrero-1166059">Lara Herrero</a>, Research Leader in Virology and Infectious Disease, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/griffith-university-828">Griffith University</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/wesley-freppel-1408971">Wesley Freppel</a>, Research Fellow, Institute for Glycomics, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/griffith-university-828">Griffith University</a> Image credits: Getty Images This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/what-happens-in-our-body-when-we-encounter-and-fight-off-a-virus-like-the-flu-sars-cov-2-or-rsv-207023">original article</a>.

Body

What is ‘fawning’? How is it related to trauma and the ‘fight or flight’ response?

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/alix-woolard-409037">Alix Woolard</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/telethon-kids-institute-1608">Telethon Kids Institute</a> You have probably heard of “fight or flight” responses to distressing situations. You may also be familiar with the tendency to “freeze”. But there is another defence or survival strategy a person can have: “fawn”. When our brain perceives a threat in our environment, our <a href="https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/fight-flight-freeze#in-the-body">sympathetic nervous system</a> takes over and a person can experience any one or combination of the <a href="https://pete-walker.com/fourFs_TraumaTypologyComplexPTSD.htm">four F</a> responses. <h2>What are the four Fs?</h2> The fawn response usually occurs when a person is being attacked in some way, and they try to appease or placate their attacker to protect themselves. A fight response is when someone reacts to a threat with aggression. Flight is when a person responds by fleeing – either literally by leaving the situation, or symbolically, by distracting or avoiding a distressing situation. A freeze response occurs when a person realises (consciously or not) that they cannot resist the threat, and they detach themselves or become immobile. They may “space out” and not pay attention, feel disconnected to their body, or have difficulty speaking after they feel threatened. <h2>What does fawning look like?</h2> Previously known as appeasement or “people pleasing”, the term “fawning” was coined by psychotherapist <a href="http://pete-walker.com/complex_ptsd_book.html">Pete Walker</a> in his 2013 book <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/20556323-complex-ptsd">Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving</a>. A fawn response can look like: <ul> <li>people-pleasing (doing things for others to gain their approval or to make others like you)</li> <li>being overly reliant on others (difficulty making decisions without other people’s input)</li> <li>prioritising the needs of others and ignoring your own</li> <li>being overly agreeable</li> <li>having trouble saying no</li> <li>in more severe cases, <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0149763421004917?casa_token=FzabbqNoE0UAAAAA:DAr_QkVegIa70Zheq6vTkCrsYPJdw06kdds659h-VHSRtPSUErDzVgj-YsLunjvGkn4Mwyb1">dissociating</a> (disconnecting from your mind and/or body).</li> </ul> While there isn’t yet much research on this response, the fawn response is seen more in people who have experienced <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/00958964.2022.2163220?journalCode=vjee20">complex trauma</a> in their childhood, including among children who grew up with emotionally or physically abusive caregivers. Fawning is also observed in people who are in situations of <a href="https://europepmc.org/article/MED/37052112">interpersonal violence</a> (such as domestic violence, assault or kidnappings), when the person needs to appease or calm a perpetrator to survive. Fawning is also different to the other F responses, in that it seems to be a uniquely human response. <h2>Why do people fawn?</h2> <a href="https://www.proquest.com/docview/2447256147/abstract/13E401AC2C1C40C6PQ/1">Research</a> suggests people fawn for two reasons: <ol> <li>to protect themselves or others from physical or emotional harm (such as childhood trauma)</li> <li>to create or improve the emotional connection to the perpetrator of harm (for example, a caregiver).</li> </ol> This type of response is adaptive at the time of the traumatic event(s): by appeasing an attacker or perpetrator, it helps the person avoid harm. However, if a person continues to use this type of response in the long term, as an automatic response to everyday stressors (such difficult interactions with your boss or neighbour), it can have negative consequences. If a person is continually trying to appease others, they may experience issues with boundaries, forming a cohesive identity, and may not feel safe in relationships with others. <h2>What can I do if I ‘fawn’?</h2> Because fawning is typically a response to interpersonal or complex trauma, using it in response to everyday stressors may indicate a need for healing. If this is you, and you have a history of complex trauma, seek psychological support from a professional who is trained in trauma-informed practice. Trauma-informed means the psychological care is holistic, empowering, strengths-focused, collaborative and reflective. Evidence-based therapies that are helpful following trauma include: <ul> <li> <a href="https://www.emdr.com/what-is-emdr/">eye movement desensitisation therapy</a>, which focuses on <a href="https://theconversation.com/what-is-emdr-therapy-and-how-does-it-help-people-who-have-experienced-trauma-161743">processing traumatic memories</a> </li> <li> <a href="https://www.apa.org/ptsd-guideline/patients-and-families/exposure-therapy#:%7E:text=In%20this%20form%20of%20therapy,reduce%20fear%20and%20decrease%20avoidance.">exposure therapy</a> to help expose people to things they fear and avoid </li> <li> <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4396183/">trauma-focused cognitive behavioural therapy</a> that aims to alleviate trauma symptoms by overcoming unhelpful thoughts and behaviours. </li> </ul> Depending on where you live, <a href="https://www.childabuseroyalcommissionresponse.gov.au/support-services">free counselling services</a> may be available for people who have experienced childhood abuse. Setting healthy boundaries is also a common focus when working with the fawn response, which you can do by yourself or alongside a therapist. If this article has raised issues for you or you’re concerned about someone you know, call Lifeline on 13 11 14.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/205024/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/alix-woolard-409037">Alix Woolard</a>, Senior Researcher, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/telethon-kids-institute-1608">Telethon Kids Institute</a> Image credits: Getty Images This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/what-is-fawning-how-is-it-related-to-trauma-and-the-fight-or-flight-response-205024">original article</a>.

Caring

How to start your own book club

Starting a book club is easy – all you need is to love reading. Here’s how to get yours off to a flying start. Finding Fellow Readers Ask around your existing personal networks, including neighbours, friends, social media, or a community noticeboard. Once you mention you want to start a club, you’ll be surprised how many people may want to come along. Ask at your local bookshop and library for ideas – many run regular reading groups and can point you in the right direction for good books. Identify what common interests you and your group have and use these to help draw like-minded people. Once you start looking, you’ll find book clubs for men or women, seniors, sci-fi lovers, teenagers or cookery buffs. The Time, the Place Once you have a group, agree on how often you want to meet – typically clubs meet monthly, though the time-poor may want to make it bi-monthly. For many clubs, meeting at home works best as you don’t have to get dressed up, and noisy public venues can make talking hard. If members bring a plate of food or a bottle, it takes the pressure off the host. But try rotating your meeting location as this will help to stimulate fresh thoughts. Idea Tailor your venue according to the book’s subject matter. The Light Between the Oceans by M.L. Stedman was discussed over fish’n’chips by one club, while The Red Tent by Anita Diamant was chewed over at a Middle Eastern restaurant. Size Matters According to Christine Callen, a book club veteran of 15 years, you need a minimum number of people per meeting to make it interesting. “Seven is the magic number – fewer and there’s not enough for healthy debate,” she says. “You can have ten people in the club – not everyone will be able to make it every time – seven provides enough opinions.” Choosing the Books If you’re the club instigator, it’s easier if you pick the first book. Seek out book reviews in good magazines and newspapers and at bookshops. The flavour of the books you choose will be largely dictated by the personalities attending – you might like to have a wide range of genres from sci-fi to romance to travel epics. Or stick to one genre, such as history books. Decide on a strategy and a time frame – say five to 12 books across the year – then review how everything appeals to the majority. Take turns to come up with a list of four or five titles, then circulate the list via email shortly after your last discussion. Members can then vote on their preferred next book and meeting time. The member scheduled to host the next meeting coordinates the responses to decide the title and date most voted for. Starting Discussion Callen recommends beginning by asking all members to briefly give their opinion on the book. “Everyone arrives and has a drink to loosen up,” she explains. “Then we take it in turns to go around the room and each give the book a mark out of ten, saying in a few sentences what we liked or disliked about it. This gives everyone a chance to speak early in the night and stops one person dominating the conversation from the start.” Tip There is no one way to interpret a book. In fact, differing opinions are good. This article first appeared in <a href="http://www.readersdigest.co.nz/home-tips/How-to-Start-Your-Own-Book-Club">Reader’s Digest</a>. Images: Getty

Books

How to holiday with your family without fighting

Rachel Croson, Dean, College of Social Science; MSU Foundation Professor of Economics, Michigan State University, explains how to have a holiday with your family without fighting. I had the most awesome holiday this year. My husband took our two boys, ages 8 and 10, to his family’s celebration, and I had five days of uninterrupted sleep, fun with friends and grownup time. Don’t get me wrong; I love my husband’s family and I believe that holidays are important opportunities for making memories. But I desperately needed a break, and I got one. And my husband and kids were delighted by the outcome as well. How did this happen? I applied the lessons from my academic study of bargaining and negotiation to my personal life. So, with another holiday season upon us, here’s some guidance on how to negotiate with your partner while strengthening this critical relationship. From theory to practice I became interested in negotiation as a graduate student, and part of my dissertation investigated bargaining behaviour. I have taught negotiation to students and executives, published <a href="http://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/viewdoc/download?doi=10.1.1.399.3789&rep=rep1&type=pdf" target="_blank" rel="noopener">many scholarly articles</a> on bargaining and negotiation and given numerous <a href="https://www.mchra.org/event-2164407" target="_blank" rel="noopener">public lectures</a> on the topic. But, like many academics, I hadn’t thought to apply my academic expertise to my personal life. Once I started to do so, however, I quickly realized that the concepts and skills learned from negotiation can be used not only to get what you need or want out of your family life, but also to make your family life happier overall. The most important insight is that negotiation does not have to be win-lose. It can be win-win. Win-lose versus win-win The popular conception of negotiation is all about getting the best deal for yourself or your side. It was a set of Harvard professors in their <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Getting_to_Yes" target="_blank" rel="noopener">groundbreaking</a> 1981 book, <a href="https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/324551/getting-to-yes-by-roger-fisher/9780143118756/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">“Getting to Yes,”</a> who first popularly introduced the idea that negotiation could be “integrative,” or result in both parties being better off. In practice, <a href="http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/074959789090048E" target="_blank" rel="noopener">many negotiators see only “distributive” or win-lose possibilities.</a> In their minds, there is a fixed pie over which the parties are fighting: If you win, then I lose. As a result, most of the early <a href="http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/0022103168900681" target="_blank" rel="noopener">academic literature</a> and practical guidance has focused on power. As you might imagine, this can be quite problematic for negotiating within the family. In contrast, the idea of integrative or win-win negotiations involves identifying outcomes that are good for both sides. There are a number of ways one can achieve integrative negotiations, but here I will discuss three of the major ones described in <a href="https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/324551/getting-to-yes-by-roger-fisher/9780143118756/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">“Getting to Yes”</a> and <a href="http://amp.aom.org/content/18/3/109" target="_blank" rel="noopener">subsequent articles</a>. Trade-offs. For example, consider a couple sharing a chicken for dinner. One way to share would be to cut the chicken in half and to each get an equal portion. This would be a distributive solution since we are distributing the chicken between the couple, and if one were to get more (win), the other would get less (lose). An integrative agreement can be found by identifying trade-offs between the two parties. For example, it turns out that I like the dark meat and my husband likes the white meat. So I can give him my breast and wing and he can give me his leg and thigh, and we can both win. Adding issues. A second way to achieve win-win solutions is to change the scope of the negotiation. For example, each year my husband and I negotiate about where to take our summer vacation. I want to go to the forests of Lake Tahoe, and he wants to go to the casinos of Atlantic City. As long as the scope of the negotiation remains focused on this one trip, it will be difficult to satisfy us both. However, imagine we expanded the negotiation to include multiple dimensions. For example, we could make a multi-year deal where we alternated our destinations. Or I could commit to spending our winter vacation in Atlantic City, in exchange for a summer vacation in Lake Tahoe. Or he could agree to let me pick the vacation destination if I allow him to host a monthly poker game at our house. Beyond positions to interests. A third way to achieve win-win solutions is to move beyond each individual’s position and focus on his or her interests. For example, when my husband and I were getting married, we had our strongest disagreement about the wedding cake. I wanted chocolate and he wanted white (vanilla). After many rounds of arguing, I finally asked why he wanted white cake. He replied that white was traditional and he wanted the cake to be white in the pictures. I told him that my whole family liked chocolate, and we wanted to eat chocolate cake. Once you move beyond positions (white cake versus chocolate cake) to underlying interests (picture cake versus eating cake), many integrative solutions become possible: white chocolate, bride’s cake/groom’s cake, Photoshop and so on. In the end, we had a three-tier cake, with two large chocolate tiers and one small white tier which we fed each other for the photos. Negotiation tactics for the family So, how should you negotiate with your partner, parents or children to get what everyone wants during the holidays? Here are some suggested tactics to help you achieve these win-win outcomes. Be honest, not mean. To achieve win-win negotiations, all parties involved must be honest about what they want. <a href="http://www.people.hbs.edu/kmcginn/PDFs/Publishedarticles/1995-friendslovers.pdf" target="_blank" rel="noopener">One study</a> found that married couples come to fewer win-win solutions than friends in part because they are unwilling to ask for what they want, thinking that the other person will be angry with them. Simply giving in to the other person’s demands is not the pathway to win-win solutions. Instead, each party needs to express what is important to him or her and why, and listen carefully to his or her partner’s priorities and reasoning. Explaining that I wanted to eat chocolate cake and understanding that my husband wanted white cake for the pictures was pivotal to our coming to a win-win agreement. Make concessions. One of the hallmarks of negotiations is that no one gets everything he or she wants. You need to be willing to make concessions, to give up the aspects that are less important to you in order to get what is most important to you. While cleaning up after poker games at our house is not my idea of a great time, it’s worth it to get the summer vacation I want. Be creative. Once you understand and accept each other’s needs, you need to be creative about finding ways to meet them. This can involve brainstorming and being tolerant of your partner’s crazy, off-the-wall ideas in the process. Should we go to Monaco? What about an online poker account? How about a long weekend in Reno during our Tahoe trip? Make promises, not threats. Finally, a word about language. One of the realities of negotiation is that either party can walk away. One way to keep the conversation constructive is to make promises (if we both order the chicken, I’ll trade your white meat for my dark meat) and avoid threats (if you won’t trade, I’ll have to order the surf-and-turf). The past and the future Each family has a long history together, with real and perceived slights. Families also expect to have long futures together. As a result, it is extremely important that these negotiations be handled with respect for the other party, and with a view to the long-term costs and benefits. Pick your battles, and concede on the other issues. You don’t need to win them all, just the important ones. Image credit: Shutterstock Written by Rachel Croson. Republished with permission of <a href="http://theconversation.com/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Conversation</a>.<img style="font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, 'Segoe UI', Roboto, Oxygen, Ubuntu, Cantarell, 'Open Sans', 'Helvetica Neue', sans-serif;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/88842/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-advanced" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" />

Travel Tips

7 hot things to do this winter

The best thing about winter in Australia is that in most parts of the country the weather doesn’t stop you from spending time outside. While swims at the beach might be out, there are still many things you can do out in the fresh winter air. We’ve rounded up some of our favourites. 1. Christmas in July picnic While people may think picnics are a summer-only activity, when it’s a sunny winter's day there is nowhere better to be than outdoors. As long as you suitably rug up, a picnic in your local park with family and friends is the perfect way to spend the day. With July coming up why don’t you get your family and or friends together and throw a Christmas in July party. It’s even an appropriate time get out the Christmas jumpers – something we cannot do on December 25th in this country. 2. A trip to the zoo Visiting the zoo is a great day out for all, young and old. Many zoos across the country put on special shows and activities during the school holidays (think June/July), so this is a great time to think about taking younger family members or the grandkids. 3. Wine and cheese tasting Whether you want to head out to some wineries for the day or have your own wine and cheese tasting soiree at home, winter is the perfect time to kick back with a lovely glass of red and a platter of cheeses. While Australia has many amazing wineries that everyone should try, we also love the idea of holding a wine tasting party. You can assign one type of wine to each of your guests and even theme the day (wines from one country or each person brings a wine from where they grew up) to make it more fun. 4. Walk in a national park We are so blessed with beautiful national parks in Australia, and many of them have lots of walking trails ranging from easy to more strenuous. While rainy, snowy or extremely windy days won’t be ideal for heading out for a walk, the crisp winter air combined with the sun offers the perfect conditions for a long walk. Just don’t forget a raincoat, some water and your mobile phone in case you need them. 5. A day trip to a remote pub Life is all about experiences and they say that those who mix things up, are generally happier people. So quick, get out of town for the day. Research small towns nearby and look for a lovely pub to go for a nice lunch at. You might even want to make a special playlist of old songs to make the car journey extra fun. 6. Have a bake off with your friends It is winter, so there are bound to be some rainy or snowy days. On these days when you’re restricted to indoor activities, why not invite the grandkids, family or friends over and have a mini bake-off. Competition aside, at the end of the bake-off you’ll have some warm treats to enjoy with a nice cuppa. 7. Start a winter book club There’s no better time to start a book club than during winter. Not only is winter the perfect time to curl up on the couch with a blanket and catch up on reading, it is also a time when you’ll be more inclined to spend time indoors by the fire or heater. Why not turn your extra time spent reading into a book club? It gives you an excuse to catch up and spend hours on end chatting with friends – even if the conversation veers away from the book. Images: Getty

Retirement Life

"Who picks a fight with a rock star?" Jimmy Barnes confronts on-road "bully"

Jimmy Barnes' wife Jane has ripped into a truck driver who "bullied" the couple on the road, with the driver attempting to "fight Jimmy on the roadside". Jane Barnes said the incident occurred on Wednesday night in the south Sydney suburb of Botany Bay, when the couple had been driving home from a charity event. In a furious thread on Twitter, Jane detailed the terrifying incident which resulted in the police being called. Jane wrote, "(He) cut us off across our lane and swiped our mirror, wanted to fight Jimmy on the roadside." "Trucks are like weapons, bullies behind the wheel a danger to us all," she wrote, alongside the hashtags #TOLL and #NOtobullies. Jane then shared a photo of the truck drivers' side profile as he almost came to blows with the rockstar, as well as photos of the truck's license plate and the Barnes' car which shows the drivers' side wing mirror bent out of place. Jane went on to say the truckie had shared his details with the couple and that NSW Police had been called over the altercation. However, she said, officers "couldn't do much" if there were no injuries or damages. Jane's post drew in a wave of attention, with one fan asking, "Who picks a fight with a rock star?" Ms Barnes replied, "Shouldn't matter who it is. This guy was just a pig. Swearing, smug, ignorant, misogynist bully." The musician continued her rant on Instagram, writing, "When you drive a truck you're in charge of a weapon. A bully at the wheel can kill people." Many sent their sympathies to the couple, with some saying the tweet was "poignant" given the increase in accidents on Aussie roads. Image credits: Twitter

Travel Trouble

3 things all couples fight about (and what to do about them)

All couples argue from time to time, and it seems that we’re all fighting about the same things. These three issues crop up time and time again, mainly because there’s a deeper meaning than whose turn is it really to vacuum the house. Here are a few reasons why conflicts about money, sex and chores often escalate and how to cool down things down. Money Fights about money are rarely about money. Money is fraught with layers of meaning and often how we see it (and how we handle it) is a reflection of our personal values around freedom, security and generosity. Fights about spending can often be traced back to fears about not having influence in important matters in your life, worries about future security or concerns that your partner does not respect you or your money values. If you find yourself continually arguing about money, rather than focusing on the dollar value of items or pinning blame on who spent what when, talk generally about what role you think money should play in your life. Sex The intimate act of sex can both be a wonderful cementer of relationships or it can be terrible wedge that causes untold relationship tension. Arguing about how often to have sex is often not about the act itself but about our feelings of connection, affection and love. It’s important to remember that just like people change over the years so do desires and intimacy needs. Fluctuating libidos is a factor of life and the way to ensure you’re on the same page as your partner is to communicate. Don’t just expect your partner to instinctively know what you need. Housework It may sound like the most trivial of fights but disputes over domestic chores are less about the tasks and more about the underlying meanings of respect, fairness and worth. When one person feels like the household tasks are not shared or equal, it can unearth negative feelings that the other person does not appreciate them or does not respect them enough to help out. Have an agreement about housework tasks and talk about whether it may have a deeper meaning. Image credit: Shutterstock

Relationships

The craziest things you can do on a cruise ship

Onboard entertainment on cruise ships is no longer limited to shuffleboard and conga lines. These days you can do just about anything on the high seas. Here are five of the craziest activities Fly over the ocean If the view from the deck isn’t enough for you, why not hang out over the side of the ship almost 100 metres above the waves? The new Quantum of the Seas has a unique London Eye-style glass pod that is attached to a mechanical arm and swings passengers out over the ocean for unbeatable panoramic views. Learn to surf Thankfully we aren’t suggesting that you try the waves over the side of the ship. A number of Royal Caribbean ships have a specially designed wave pool where passengers can learn to surf or boogie board. 130,000 litres of water per minute creates a current strong enough to stand up in and the trampoline-style walls mean you won’t hurt yourself when you wipe out. Climb the crows nest This is not one for the faint hearted. Onboard Star Clippers small sailing ships, brave guests can climb all the way to the top of the mast, over 21 metres above the deck. If you want to experience a little of the sailing life closer to sea level, you can also take basic sailing lessons and help the crew unfurl the sails. Zip line Walking across the deck is so 2005. Two Royal Caribbean ships have huge zip lines that shoot passengers across the centre of the ship, suspended nine decks in the air. You’ll feel the sea breeze in your hair and the views are great – if you can bring yourself to open your eyes. Sky dive from the ground up Typically skydiving is a top down affair, but you can now experience the same feeling taking off from land (or sea). The Ripcord by iFLY has a cushion of air that pushes a person upwards inside a huge glass tube and the air rushing past at over 150 kilometres an hour gives the sensation that you are really flying. This is another one that you’ll only find on new megaliner Quantum of the Seas. Images: Getty

Cruising

Conversation starters for solo travellers

We all know of stranger danger but when you’re a solo traveller the ability to talk to strangers (safely, though) is one of the most important skills to have under your belt. Chatting with strangers will not only add to your travel experience but it might even lead to life-long friendships. Here are a few conversation starters to keep up your sleeve. A note on safety: Don’t be afraid to tell people you are a solo traveller. People are often more keen to chat and talk to those travelling alone, however it’s important to exercise caution. Look for clues to see if the person can be trusted and stay in public places. When eating out, sit at a communal table or at the bar. Chat to people sitting next to you. If they are a local, you can ask them about the restaurant and any local recommendations. If they are a fellow traveller, ask them where they’re from and how their trip is going. Ask someone to take your photo. Be mindful of the fact there are some scammers targeting tourist destinations to steal cameras so use your judgement but this is an easy and natural way to strike up a conversation. A family or a group of tourist can usually be trusted and counted on to take your Start with the sight you’re getting photographed. Comment on a tourist destination. If you’re wandering around a museum/gallery/popular site, keep a look out for other solo travellers. Keep it simple and introduce yourself, following up questions about how their enjoying where you both are. Be aware that not everyone wants to chat but most solo travellers have an open mind and want to meet new people. Image credits: Getty Images

Travel Tips

Who hit who? Gwyneth Paltrow fighting “hit and run” charges

Gwyneth Paltrow has appeared in court as she fights charges over a skiing collision that left a man with permanent injuries and brain damage. The actor-turned-wellness influencer is being sued for $450,000 (AUD) by a retired optometrist, who claims Paltrow violently crashed into him in 2016 while skiing at one of the most upscale ski resorts in the United States. Terry Sanderson, 76, said Paltrow was skiing down the slopes so recklessly that they collided, leaving him on the ground as she and her entourage continued their descent down Deer Valley Resort, Utah. "Gwyneth Paltrow skied out of control," Sanderson's attorneys claim in the lawsuit, "knocking him down hard, knocking him out, and causing a brain injury, four broken ribs and other serious injuries. Paltrow got up, turned and skied away, leaving Sanderson stunned, lying in the snow, seriously injured." With the lawsuit now lasting several years, Sanderson is suing Paltrow for the hefty six figure sum, claiming that the accident was a result of negligence, and left him with physical injuries and emotional distress. As the trial began, a central question in the case was posed, wondering which skier had the right of way. At ski resorts, the skier who is downhill has the right of way, so the case is largely focused around who was farther down the beginner's run when the collision transpired. Both Paltrow and Sanderson claim in court filings that they were farther downhill when the other rammed into them. Sanderson has also accused the ski resort of "covering up" the matter by not providing complete information on incident reports and not following resort safety policies. After his initial lawsuit seeking $US3.1 million ($4.65 million AUD) was dropped, Sanderson amended the complaint and he is now seeking $US300,000. Paltrow filed a counterclaim, seeking attorney fees and $US1 ($1.50) in damages, as she claims Sanderson was actually the culprit in the collision, is overstating his injuries, and is trying to exploit her celebrity and wealth. Image credits: Getty Images

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Breakfast Club star finally joins the baby club

Actor Anthony Hall and his wife, Lucia Oskerova, have shared the delightful news that they are expecting their first child together. In a statement to People, the 54-year-old actor, best known for his roles in Sixteen Candles and The Breakfast Club, opened up about how 34-year-old Lucia broke the news - a far cry from his The Breakfast Club character Brian Johnson’s stubborn “it's personal business. It's my personal, private business.” "Lucia and I were at home,” he explained. “She surprised me by revealing that she was pregnant with an at-home pregnancy test. We were kissing, hugging, and thanking God. We immediately started dancing and laughing in our bathroom to celebrate the good news.” Anthony went on to add that the couple will be having a boy, and that they already have a name for the little one picked out - “Michael Anthony the II”. Anthony’s full name is Michael Anthony Hall, but he changed it as many celebrities do upon joining the Screen Actors Guild in 1976. Of their upcoming dive into parenthood this summer, he gushed, "my wife and I are feeling so blessed, excited and filled with joy in anticipation of our son being born this summer.” Lucia took to Instagram to share their exciting news, with a post that also wished their fans a happy Valentine’s Day, tagging it “#babynews” and “#firsttimeparents”. “Congratulations!” Wrote Boardwalk Empire actor Chris Caldovino, to the thanks of both expectant parents. “I’ve been waiting FOREVER for the announcement of my new baby buddy! Love, love, love!” Declared one loved one, to whom Lucia responded that “it was starting to get hard to keep it a secret.” <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/Cop_osxSaGM/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/Cop_osxSaGM/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Lucia Oskerova (@luciaoskerova)</a> </div> </blockquote> Anthony had nothing but praise for his wife when asked about her pregnancy experience, telling People she’s been a “champ throughout”. "She's tending to every important detail as a proud, expectant mother-to-be,” he explained. “She is now six and half months along. "As a new father-to-be, I've been taking care of family business and making sure we all eat well, with a healthy diet of good foods — plenty of greens, vegetables, fresh fruit, and protein-rich food. Lucia makes great smoothies for us. And we are all getting good sleep each night." Anthony, as character Brian Johnson, once announced that he was “in the math club, uh, the Latin, and the physics club”. Whether or not Anthony himself has ever added any of these to his resume as well, he’ll soon be a lifetime member of The Baby Club. Image: Getty

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Who hit who? Gwyneth Paltrow fighting “hit and run” charges

Breakfast Club star finally joins the baby club