Placeholder Content Image

Dwayne Johnson's emotional moment with cancer-stricken fan

<p>A heartfelt moment between Hollywood actor Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson and a fan battling stage 4 cancer has gone viral. </p> <p>While on a trip to Target in New Jersey, Johnson met a woman who shared candidly that she was facing stage 4 pancreatic cancer. </p> <p>Johnson greeted her warmly in the shop, “Good to see you, how are you feeling?”</p> <p>With a smile, the woman replied: “Stage 4 pancreatic cancer. Can’t do anything about it.”</p> <p>Johnson then offered to take a photo with her, to which she responded, “I would love to.”</p> <p>As they posed together, the woman proudly declared, “I’m a warrior,” prompting Johnson to affirm, “You are a warrior,” before the woman joked that they looked alike since they both had no hair.</p> <p>Before he parted, she told Johnson: “We gotta keep fighting, fight fight fight.”</p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/reel/DCTEM7ixvm1/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/reel/DCTEM7ixvm1/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Dwayne Johnson (@therock)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>The Rock then posted a video of the sweet moment to his Instagram, reflecting on the moment with the caption, "As frenzied, and chaotic as all this was - it hit me here just how unpredictable, yet beautiful life truly is."</p> <p>The video quickly racked up hundreds of thousands of likes, with many commenting words of support for the fan. </p> <p>"The Rock is the most humble guy ever," one person wrote, while another added, "You made that woman's day!"</p> <p><em>Image credits: Instagram </em></p>

Caring

Placeholder Content Image

"Happy wives, happy social lives?" Men are more emotionally disconnected than women – what can be done about it?

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/roger-patulny-94836">Roger Patulny</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/hong-kong-baptist-university-2801">Hong Kong Baptist University</a></em></p> <p>Many of us are worried about loneliness and isolation, and both <a href="https://theconversation.com/dont-be-fooled-loneliness-affects-men-too-15545">decade-old</a> and <a href="https://www.relationshipsnsw.org.au/blog/how-many-australians-are-lonely/">recent data</a> suggest they impact men more than women.</p> <p>Loneliness predicts health outcomes including <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/1745691614568352">early mortality</a>, greater <a href="https://hqlo.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12955-022-01946-6">psychological distress</a>, and more <a href="https://www.nature.com/articles/s41572-022-00355-9">cardiovascular, metabolic and neurological problems</a>.</p> <p>New research also links loneliness to <a href="https://bmcpublichealth.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12889-024-18770-w">more intolerant attitudes towards women</a>.</p> <p>These findings raise concerns over the causes and impacts of men’s loneliness and isolation.</p> <h2>A deep dive into loneliness</h2> <p>I recently analysed more than 50 indicators from a decade of data collected by the <a href="https://www.acspri.org.au/aussa">Australian Social Attitudes Survey</a>, from 2011–12, 2015–16, 2017–18, and 2022–23.</p> <p>My statistical models produced results for (self-identified) men and women, after controlling for the impacts of age, employment and partner status.</p> <p>I confirmed that Australian men are more likely to be socially and emotionally disconnected than women. I also found some reasons why this might be the case.</p> <p>I found men appear to focus their emotional energies primarily on their nuclear families and partners. Consequently, they over-rely on their female partners for intimate support and develop more distant, limited and transactional relationships with other people – and other men.</p> <h2>Men are more emotionally disconnected</h2> <p>The data show men continue to lack emotional support on a range of indicators. This puts them at greater risk of health impacts and potentially encourages more toxic attitudes towards women.</p> <p>A significantly greater proportion of men than women reported:</p> <ul> <li>receiving no support from their closest friend</li> <li>receiving fun/practical advice over emotional support from close friends</li> <li>having less contact with a close friend</li> <li>not having anyone for emotional support</li> <li>not feeling “very close” to their closest friend</li> <li>not feeling “love” as their most commonly experienced emotion in the last week.</li> </ul> <h2>Men have more distant, transactional relationships</h2> <p>Why are men in this situation?</p> <p>Masculinity roles are clearly influential.</p> <p>Traditional masculinity encourages men to appear capable, controlled and independent, avoid displays of “vulnerable” emotions or male-to-male affection (like hugging, touch or crying), and embrace the hetero-normative ideal of male provision and leadership.</p> <p>Such norms have been found to constrain male intimacy <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37531906/">by disallowing vulnerability</a>.</p> <p>My data show men tend to develop looser, transactional ties with more distant people. This may reduce the quality of the connection and its potential to reduce loneliness.</p> <p>I have found men are more likely than women to:</p> <ul> <li>think it is OK to befriend someone just because they’ll make a “useful” contact</li> <li>feel obligated to repay favours immediately (foregoing longer-term connections)</li> <li>be kind to others because they “value doing the right thing”, rather than because they empathically connect with or care about the person</li> <li>give and receive kindness from strangers (rather than more familiar people)</li> <li>seek help with household jobs from more distant family or friends</li> <li>seek practical support (money, advice) from private and commercial sources (rather than friends or family)</li> <li>not seek help from family or friends for emotional, sickness or care issues.</li> </ul> <p>This means many men retain an individualist masculine desire to remain emotionally aloof.</p> <hr /> <p><iframe id="TBJfz" class="tc-infographic-datawrapper" style="border: 0px none currentcolor;" src="https://datawrapper.dwcdn.net/TBJfz/" width="100%" height="400px" frameborder="0" scrolling="no"></iframe></p> <hr /> <h2>Appearing in control but becoming dependent?</h2> <p>So where <em>do</em> men turn for intimate, emotional connection?</p> <p>Most often, their families.</p> <p>Prior studies show partnered men are <a href="https://bmcpublichealth.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12889-024-18770-w">less lonely than single men</a>. My data show men revere the nuclear family institution and the core supportive role of women and female partners.</p> <p>Men are more likely than women to:</p> <ul> <li>believe having children increases their social standing</li> <li>believe family is more important than friends</li> <li>rely on family over friends for support</li> <li>have mixed-gender friendships (in contrast to womens’ predominately female friendships)</li> <li>see their (predominantly female) partner as their closest friend</li> <li>emotionally support their (predominantly female) partner ahead of supporting others.</li> </ul> <p>However, the masculine desire to be a “good nuclear family man” <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37531906/">can both support and impede</a> men’s social connection.</p> <p>Partnered men might feel less lonely but that doesn’t mean they give or gain sufficient emotional support from their nuclear families.</p> <p>My data show men are less likely than women to:</p> <ul> <li>plan or organise social and family activities</li> <li>have at least weekly contact with non-nuclear family or friends</li> <li>emotionally support their friends, family or children ahead of their partners</li> <li>have their partner support them ahead of others (women were more likely to support their children first).</li> </ul> <p>This raises several issues.</p> <p>If men cling to the notion that their primary role is to provide for and support their (female) partner – while she in turn emotionally supports everyone else – they risk becoming personally isolated through diminished networks and outmoded expectations.</p> <p>In this context, men who believe they should earn more than their partners <a href="https://theconversation.com/loneliness-in-the-workplace-is-greatest-among-men-with-traditional-views-about-being-the-breadwinner-230535">are lonelier</a> than other men.</p> <p>It also risks pushing the burden of maintaining social and emotional connections onto <a href="https://www.harpersbazaar.com/culture/features/a27259689/toxic-masculinity-male-friendships-emotional-labor-men-rely-on-women/">women and partners</a>, and men becoming socially and emotionally dependent on them.</p> <p>And it can “bake in” hetero-normative family-to-family interactions (organised by female partners) as the most “legitimate” form of socialising for men.</p> <p>This can be highly exclusionary for LGBTQIA+ people, along with single men and single fathers, who register among <a href="https://www.relationships.org.au/relationship-indicators/">the highest rates of loneliness in Australia</a>.</p> <hr /> <p><iframe id="qCmHw" class="tc-infographic-datawrapper" style="border: 0px none currentcolor;" src="https://datawrapper.dwcdn.net/qCmHw/" width="100%" height="400px" frameborder="0" scrolling="no"></iframe></p> <hr /> <h2>How can men become more emotionally connected?</h2> <p>Feelings shouldn’t be seen as just a <a href="https://www.harpersbazaar.com/culture/features/a27259689/toxic-masculinity-male-friendships-emotional-labor-men-rely-on-women/">“female thing”</a>.</p> <p>Younger men’s more inclusive masculine attitudes can allow them to <a href="https://theconversation.com/he-is-always-there-to-listen-friendships-between-young-men-are-more-than-just-beers-and-banter-200301">subvert the “rules” of masculinity</a>, express emotion and embrace <a href="https://theconversation.com/he-is-always-there-to-listen-friendships-between-young-men-are-more-than-just-beers-and-banter-200301">“bromances”</a>.</p> <p>Men can also connect emotionally with other men through <a href="https://theconversation.com/he-is-always-there-to-listen-friendships-between-young-men-are-more-than-just-beers-and-banter-200301">jokes and humour</a> and participating in shared activities <a href="https://theconversation.com/lost-touch-with-friends-during-lockdown-heres-how-to-reconnect-and-let-go-of-toxic-ones-172853">that allow incidental communication</a>, like Men’s Sheds.</p> <p>The following initiatives may well help men broaden their intimate networks beyond the nuclear family. We could:<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/239194/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <ul> <li>help men into caring roles through more <a href="https://theconversation.com/loneliness-in-the-workplace-is-greatest-among-men-with-traditional-views-about-being-the-breadwinner-230535">family friendly employment and care-leave policies</a></li> <li>support initiatives such as <a href="https://meninmind.movember.com/">Movember Men in Mind</a> that encourage men to seek help, and improve their emotional expression and support skills</li> <li>encourage partnered, heterosexual men to broaden and diversify their intimate networks beyond the nuclear family bubble, and be more inclusive of single men, single fathers, and LGBTQIA+ people. <a href="https://thephn.com.au/news/the-mens-table-successful-mental-health-initiative-expanding-across-seven-new-regions">Men’s Table initiatives</a> could be of great value here</li> <li>encourage the development of more online <a href="https://theconversation.com/he-is-always-there-to-listen-friendships-between-young-men-are-more-than-just-beers-and-banter-200301">safe spaces</a> to form intimate bonds while avoiding toxic online masculine spaces.</li> </ul> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/roger-patulny-94836">Roger Patulny</a>, Professor, Academy of Geography, Sociology and International Studies, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/hong-kong-baptist-university-2801">Hong Kong Baptist University</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/happy-wives-happy-social-lives-men-are-more-emotionally-disconnected-than-women-what-can-be-done-about-it-239194">original article</a>.</em></p>

Mind

Placeholder Content Image

Olympic legend given just two years to live

<p>British Olympic legend Sir Chris Hoy has announced that his cancer is terminal.</p> <p>In an interview with <em>The Sunday Times</em>, the six-time Olympic cycling champion revealed that doctors have told him he has between two and four years to live. </p> <p>He told the publication that he had initially been diagnosed with cancer in his prostate, which had spread to his bones. </p> <p>Despite the terminal cancer diagnosis, the athlete remained positive and expressed his gratitude for the messages of support he has been receiving since the article's publication on Sunday. </p> <p>"You may see in the news this weekend some articles about my health, so I just wanted to reassure you all that I'm feeling fit, strong and positive," he wrote on Instagram.</p> <p>"Overwhelmed by all the love and support shown to my family and me. Onwards."</p> <p>Fellow Olympic cyclist Sir Mark Cavendish was among the many British sporting stars to send their support. </p> <p>"Hero of a human being," Cavendish wrote on Instagram. </p> <p>Three-time Olympic track medallist, Dame Kelly Holmes, added: "Sending love to you Chris." </p> <p>"Legend," commented Team GB Paralympic cycling medallist Archie Atkinson.</p> <p>Scottish Cycling added: "Sending our love and best wishes to Sir Chris and his family from everyone in the Scottish Cycling community.</p> <p>"As ever, he continues to be an inspiration on and off the track."</p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/DBJEVKhO00z/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/DBJEVKhO00z/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Skarper (@skarperofficial)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>UK Health Secretary Wes Streeting expressed his support and admiration for Hoy's openness during such a difficult moment.</p> <p>"I'm in awe that Chris Hoy is meeting his cancer with the same positivity and resilience that has defined his life and career," Streeting wrote on X.</p> <p>"The whole country will be cheering him on as we have done so many times before and sending him and his family so much love."</p> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <p dir="ltr" lang="en">Sir Chris Hoy has been an inspiration to us all as a world class sportsman, decorated Olympian &amp; a proud Scot. He’s provided so much joy to millions. He is also incredibly brave. I send my very best wishes to Chris and his family at this difficult time.<a href="https://t.co/aoP5OTKmDb">https://t.co/aoP5OTKmDb</a></p> <p>— Ian Murray MP (@IanMurrayMP) <a href="https://twitter.com/IanMurrayMP/status/1847910282254758044?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 20, 2024</a></p></blockquote> <p>Streeting, a cancer survivor himself, also told the <em>BBC</em> that he was "in awe" of Sir Chris's courage and positivity. </p> <p>"I'm in awe of his courage and positivity in face of a death sentence, which is what his cancer diagnosis is. The whole nation will be cheering him on now as we have done in the past," he said. </p> <p>"He is not the only person in this country today dealing with a terminal diagnosis... what a wonderful message of hope he has sent."</p> <p><em>Images: Instagram</em></p> <p> </p>

Caring

Placeholder Content Image

The science of happier dogs: 5 tips to help your canine friends live their best life

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/mia-cobb-15211">Mia Cobb</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/the-university-of-melbourne-722">The University of Melbourne</a></em></p> <p>When you hear about “science focused on how dogs can live their best lives with us” it sounds like an imaginary job made up by a child. However, the field of <a href="https://www.rnz.co.nz/podcast/ourchangingworld?share=2ec8e0ad-5008-4b2d-ae2e-a288e2a77f50">animal welfare science is real</a> and influential.</p> <p>As our most popular animal companion and coworker, dogs are very deserving of scientific attention. In recent years we’ve learned more about <a href="https://theconversation.com/dogs-can-get-dementia-but-lots-of-walks-may-lower-the-risk-189297">how dogs are similar to people</a>, but also how they are distinctly themselves.</p> <p>We often think about how dogs help us – as companions, <a href="https://theconversation.com/meet-moss-the-detection-dog-helping-tassie-devils-find-love-142909">working as detectors</a>, and keeping us <a href="https://theconversation.com/is-owning-a-dog-good-for-your-health-238888">safe and healthy</a>. Dog-centric science helps us <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/veterinary-science/articles/10.3389/fvets.2021.666898/full">think about the world from a four-paw perspective</a> and apply this new knowledge so dogs can enjoy a good life.</p> <p>Here are five tips to keep the tails in your life wagging happily.</p> <h2>1. Let dogs sniff</h2> <p>Sniffing <a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/animal-emotions/201902/allowing-dogs-sniff-helps-them-think-positively">makes dogs happier</a>. We tend to forget they live in a smell-based world because we’re so visual. Often taking the dog for a walk is our daily physical activity but we should remember it could be our dogs’ only time out of the home environment.</p> <p>Letting them have a really good sniff of that tree or post is full of satisfying information for them. It’s their nose’s equivalent of us standing at the top of a mountain and enjoying a rich, colour-soaked, sunset view.</p> <h2>2. Give dogs agency</h2> <p>Agency is a <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/veterinary-science/articles/10.3389/fvets.2023.1284869/full">hot topic in animal welfare science</a> right now. For people who lived through the frustration of strict lockdowns in the early years of COVID, it’s easy to remember how not being able to go where we wanted, or see who we wanted, when we wanted, impacted our mental health.</p> <p>We’ve now learned that <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/veterinary-science/articles/10.3389/fvets.2023.1250251/full">giving animals choice and control</a> in their lives is important for their mental wellbeing too. We can help our dogs enjoy better welfare by creating more choices and offering them control to exercise their agency.</p> <p>This might be installing a doggy door so they can go outside or inside when they like. It could be letting them decide which sniffy path to take through your local park. Perhaps it’s choosing which three toys to play with that day from a larger collection that gets rotated around. Maybe it’s putting an old blanket down in a new location where you’ve noticed the sun hits the floor for them to relax on.</p> <p>Providing choices doesn’t have to be complicated or expensive.</p> <h2>3. Recognise all dogs are individuals</h2> <p>People commonly ascribe certain personality traits to certain dog breeds. But just like us, dogs have their own personalities <a href="https://scitechdaily.com/food-vs-toys-scientists-reveal-what-dogs-truly-prefer/">and preferences</a>. Not all dogs are going to like the same things and a new dog we live with may be completely different to the last one.</p> <p>One dog might like to go to the dog park and run around with other dogs at high speed for an hour, while another dog would much rather hang out with you chewing on something in the garden.</p> <p>We can see as much <a href="https://www.science.org/content/article/your-dog-s-breed-doesn-t-determine-its-personality-study-suggests">behavioural variation within breeds as we do between them</a>. Being prepared to meet dogs where they are, as individuals, is important to their welfare.</p> <p>As well as noticing what dogs like to do as individuals, it’s important not to force dogs into situations they don’t enjoy. <a href="https://www.rspca.org.uk/adviceandwelfare/pets/dogs/behaviour/understanding">Pay attention to behaviour</a> that indicates dogs aren’t comfortable, such as looking away, licking their lips or yawning.</p> <h2>4. Respect dogs’ choice to opt out</h2> <p>Even in our homes, we can provide options if our dogs don’t want to share in every activity with us. Having a quiet place that dogs can retreat to is really important in enabling them to opt out if they want to.</p> <p>If you’re watching television loudly, it may be too much for <a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/canine-corner/202407/how-good-is-a-dogs-hearing-compared-to-humans">their sensitive ears</a>. Ensure a door is open to another room so they can retreat. Some dogs might feel overwhelmed when visitors come over; giving them somewhere safe and quiet to go rather than forcing an interaction will help them cope.</p> <p>Dogs can be terrific role models for children when teaching empathy. We can demonstrate consent by letting dogs approach us for pats and depart when they want. Like seeing exotic animals perform in circuses, dressing up dogs for our own entertainment seems to have had its day. If you asked most dogs, they don’t want to wear costumes or be part of your Halloween adventures.</p> <h2>5. Opportunities for off-lead activity – safely.</h2> <p>When dogs are allowed to run off-lead, they use space differently. They tend to explore more widely and go faster than they do when walking with us on-lead. This offers them important and fun physical activity to keep them fit and healthy.</p> <figure><iframe src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/2AchEFiDwA8?wmode=transparent&amp;start=0" width="440" height="260" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe><figcaption><span class="caption">Demonstrating how dogs walk differently when on- and off-lead.</span></figcaption></figure> <p>A recent exploration of <a href="https://pursuit.unimelb.edu.au/articles/we-checked-if-melbourne-really-is-a-dog-friendly-city">how liveable cities are for dogs</a> mapped all the designated areas for dogs to run off-leash. Doggy density ranged from one dog for every six people to one dog for every 30 people, depending on where you live.</p> <p>It also considered how access to these areas related to the annual registration fees for dogs in each government area compared, with surprising differences noted across greater Melbourne. We noted fees varied between A$37 and $84, and these didn’t relate to how many off-lead areas you could access.</p> <p>For dog-loving nations, such as Australia, helping our canine friends live their best life feels good. <a href="https://www.rnz.co.nz/national/programmes/afternoons/audio/2018957756/our-changing-world-the-science-behind-dog-welfare">Science that comes from a four-paw perspective</a> can help us reconsider our everyday interactions with dogs and influence positive changes so we can live well, together.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/236952/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/mia-cobb-15211">Mia Cobb</a>, Research Fellow, Animal Welfare Science Centre, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/the-university-of-melbourne-722">The University of Melbourne</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/the-science-of-happier-dogs-5-tips-to-help-your-canine-friends-live-their-best-life-236952">original article</a>.</em></p>

Family & Pets

Placeholder Content Image

Woman sentenced to life for murdering parents and living with their bodies

<p>A British woman, who murdered her parents and lived with their bodies for four years, was sentenced to life imprisonment on Friday and is not eligible for parole for 36 years. </p> <p>When Essex Police raided Virginia McCullough's house in Great Baddow last September, the 36-year-old confessed that her parents' bodies were in the house and that she had killed them. </p> <p>She admitted to poisoning her father, John McCullough, 70, with prescription medication that she put into his drink, and then a few days later, beat her 71-year-old mother Lois McCullough with a hammer and fatally stabbed her. </p> <p>“I did know that this would kind of come eventually,” she said while handcuffed in body cam footage released by police on Friday. </p> <p>“It’s proper that I serve my punishment.”</p> <p>After McCullough was arrested, she told an officer: “Cheer up, at least you’ve caught the bad guy,” adding that “I know I don’t seem 100 per cent evil.”</p> <p>Further body cam footage showed her at the police station telling officers where to find the tools she used to kill her mother. </p> <p>She had pleaded guilty to murdering her parents at a previous hearing in June 2019. </p> <p>In the words of the prosecution, McCullough kept her father in a “homemade mausoleum” in his bedroom and study, in a structure that was “composed with masonry blocks stacked together.”</p> <p>She wrapped her mother's body in a sleeping bag and put it in a wardrobe on the top floor of the property. </p> <p>In the four years after the murder, she ran up £149,697 ($AU289,792) on credit cards in her parents’ names and continued to spend their pensions.</p> <p>The court heard she cancelled family arrangements and told doctors and relatives that her parents were unwell or away on a trip. </p> <p>Statements from her three unnamed siblings were also read in court, and one said:  “our parents were completely blameless victims”. </p> <p>“Virginia always said Mum and Dad were fine and made up lie after lie about their daily activities," another said. </p> <p>Judge Jeremy Johnson said at the sentencing hearing on Friday that McCullough’s actions represented a “gross violation of the trust that should exist between parents and their children.”</p> <p>Judge Johnson said that she had  maintained an “elaborate, extensive and enduring web of deceit” over months and years and that he was sure there was  a “substantial degree of both pre-meditation and planning," that went into the murder. </p> <p>Essex Police said documents found in the home showed that McCullough was trying desperately” to keep her parents from discovering the poor state of her finances, and gave “false assurances” about her employment and future prospects.</p> <p>“She is an intelligent manipulator who chose to kill her parents callously, without a thought for them or those who continue to suffer as a result of their loss,” said Detective Superintendent Rob Kirby. </p> <p>"The details of this case shock and horrify even the most experienced of murder detectives, let alone any right-thinking member of the public.”</p> <p><em>Image: Essex Police/ 7NEWS</em></p> <p> </p>

Legal

Placeholder Content Image

An unbroken night’s sleep is a myth. Here’s what good sleep looks like

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/amy-reynolds-424346">Amy Reynolds</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/flinders-university-972">Flinders University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/claire-dunbar-1651340">Claire Dunbar</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/flinders-university-972">Flinders University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/gorica-micic-187159">Gorica Micic</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/flinders-university-972">Flinders University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/hannah-scott-424633">Hannah Scott</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/flinders-university-972">Flinders University</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/nicole-lovato-60684">Nicole Lovato</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/flinders-university-972">Flinders University</a></em></p> <p>What do you imagine a good night’s sleep to be?</p> <p>Often when people come into our sleep clinic seeking treatment, they share ideas about healthy sleep.</p> <p>Many think when their head hits the pillow, they should fall into a deep and restorative sleep, and emerge after about eight hours feeling refreshed. They’re in good company – many Australians hold <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jpsychores.2014.09.011">the same belief</a>.</p> <p>In reality, healthy sleep is cyclic across the night, as you move in and out of the different stages of sleep, often waking up several times. Some people remember one or more of these awakenings, others do not. Let’s consider what a healthy night’s sleep looks like.</p> <h2>Sleep cycles are a roller-coaster</h2> <p>As an adult, our sleep moves through <a href="https://www.sleepfoundation.org/stages-of-sleep">different cycles</a> and brief awakenings during the night. Sleep cycles last roughly 90 minutes each.</p> <p>We typically start the night with lighter sleep, before moving into deeper sleep stages, and rising again into rapid eye movement (REM) sleep – the stage of sleep often linked to vivid dreaming.</p> <p>If sleeping well, we get most of our deep sleep in the first half of the night, with <a href="https://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/health/sleep/stages-of-sleep#:%7E:text=During%20REM%20sleep%2C%20your%20eyes,from%20acting%20out%20your%20dreams">REM sleep</a> more common in the second half of the night.</p> <p>Adults usually move through five or six sleep cycles in a night, and it is entirely <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jpsychores.2014.09.011">normal</a> to wake up briefly at the end of each one. That means we might be waking up five times during the night. This can increase with older age and still be healthy. If you’re not remembering these awakenings that’s OK – they can be quite brief.</p> <h2>What does getting a ‘good’ sleep actually mean?</h2> <p>You’ll often hear that adults <a href="https://www.sleephealthfoundation.org.au/sleep-topics/how-much-sleep-do-you-really-need#:%7E:text=Sleep%20requirements%20stabilise%20in%20early,their%20best%20the%20next%20day">need between seven and nine hours</a> of sleep per night. But good sleep is about more than the number of hours – it’s also about the quality.</p> <p>For most people, sleeping well means being able to fall asleep soon after getting into bed (within around 30 minutes), sleeping without waking up for long periods, and waking feeling rested and ready for the day.</p> <p>You shouldn’t be feeling excessively sleepy during the day, especially if you’re regularly getting at least seven hours of refreshing sleep a night (this is a rough rule of thumb).</p> <p>But are you noticing you’re feeling physically tired, needing to nap regularly and still not feeling refreshed? It may be worthwhile touching base with your general practitioner, as there a range of possible reasons.</p> <h2>Common issues</h2> <p>Sleep disorders are common. Up to <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35478719/">25% of adults</a> have insomnia, a sleep disorder where it may be hard to fall or stay asleep, or you may wake earlier in the morning than you’d like.</p> <p>Rates of common sleep disorders such as insomnia and <a href="https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/sleep-apnea/symptoms-causes/syc-20377631">sleep apnoea</a> – where your breathing can partially or completely stop many times during the night – also increase with age, affecting <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32280974/">20% of early adults</a> and 40% of people in <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35082023/">middle age</a>. There are effective treatments, so asking for help is important.</p> <p>Beyond sleep disorders, our sleep can also be disrupted by chronic health conditions – such as <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0012369218311139">pain</a> – and by <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/jsr.13075">certain medications</a>.</p> <p>There can also be other reasons we’re not sleeping well. Some of us are woken by children, pets or traffic noise during the night. These “<a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/07420528.2021.2003375">forced awakenings</a>” mean we may find it harder to get up in the morning, take longer to leave bed and feel less satisfied with our sleep. For some people, night awakenings may have no clear cause.</p> <p>A good way to tell if these awakenings are a problem for you is by thinking about how they affect you. When they cause feelings of frustration or worry, or are impacting how we feel and function during the day, it might be a sign to seek some help.</p> <p>We also may struggle to get up in the morning. This could be for a range of reasons, including not sleeping long enough, going to bed or waking up at irregular times – or even your own <a href="https://www.sleephealthfoundation.org.au/sleep-categories/circadian-rhythm-disorders#:%7E:text=The%20circadian%20rhythms%20throughout%20the,regulation%20of%20our%20sleeping%20patterns">internal clock</a>, which can influence the time your body prefers to sleep.</p> <p>If you’re regularly struggling to get up for work or family needs, it can be an indication you may need to seek help. Some of these factors can be explored with a sleep psychologist if they are causing concern.</p> <h2>Can my smart watch help?</h2> <p>It is important to remember sleep-tracking devices can <a href="https://www.nature.com/articles/s41746-024-01016-9">vary in accuracy</a> for looking at the different sleep stages. While they can give a rough estimate, they are not a perfect measure.</p> <p>In-laboratory <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/31277862/">polysomnography</a>, or PSG, is the best standard measure to examine your sleep stages. A PSG examines breathing, oxygen saturation, brain waves and heart rate during sleep.</p> <p>Rather than closely examining nightly data (including sleep stages) from a sleep tracker, it may be more helpful to look at the patterns of your sleep (bed and wake times) over time.</p> <p><a href="https://jcsm.aasm.org/doi/10.5664/jcsm.8356">Understanding your sleep patterns</a> may help identify and adjust behaviours that negatively impact your sleep, such as your bedtime routine and sleeping environment.</p> <p>And if you find viewing your sleep data is making you feel worried about your sleep, this may not be useful for you. Most importantly, if you are concerned it is important to discuss it with your GP who can refer you to the appropriate specialist sleep health provider.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/238069/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/amy-reynolds-424346">Amy Reynolds</a>, Associate Professor in Clinical Sleep Health, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/flinders-university-972">Flinders University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/claire-dunbar-1651340">Claire Dunbar</a>, Research Associate, Sleep Health, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/flinders-university-972">Flinders University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/gorica-micic-187159">Gorica Micic</a>, Postdoctoral Research Fellow, Clinical Psychologist, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/flinders-university-972">Flinders University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/hannah-scott-424633">Hannah Scott</a>, Research Fellow in Sleep Health, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/flinders-university-972">Flinders University</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/nicole-lovato-60684">Nicole Lovato</a>, Associate Professor, Adelaide Institute for Sleep Health, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/flinders-university-972">Flinders University</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/an-unbroken-nights-sleep-is-a-myth-heres-what-good-sleep-looks-like-238069">original article</a>.</em></p>

Body

Placeholder Content Image

Grave cleaning videos are going viral on TikTok. Are they honouring the dead, or exploiting them?

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/edith-jennifer-hill-1018412">Edith Jennifer Hill</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/flinders-university-972">Flinders University</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/marina-deller-947925">Marina Deller</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/flinders-university-972">Flinders University</a></em></p> <p>Cleaning the graves of strangers is the latest content trend taking over TikTok. But as millions tune in to watch the videos, it’s becoming clear not all of them are created equal. Two grave-cleaning creators in particular seem to reside at opposite ends of the trend.</p> <p>One of the first accounts to gain popularity for grave cleaning was <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@ladytaphos">@ladytaphos</a>. This account is run by Alicia Williams, a Virginia resident who treats the graves with great dignity. Williams will often share the story of the person residing within, and acts with grace and kindness as she restores beauty to the <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@ladytaphos/video/7197894295641148714">graves</a>.</p> <p>On the other end of the spectrum is Kaeli Mae McEwen, or <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@_the_clean_girl">@the_clean_girl</a>, who leans into more clickbait-y tactics. McEwen is known for throwing a pink spiky ball through a graveyard and cleaning the grave it lands on. She also uses her videos to promote her own pink foamy cleaner (which at one point could be purchased via a link in her bio).</p> <h2>Cleaning and death</h2> <p>While Williams’ and McEwen’s videos may seem novel to some, death and cleaning have a long and varied relationship that spans time and cultures.</p> <p>Washing a loved one’s body before burial or cremation isn’t just practical – it’s a significant <a href="https://www.theage.com.au/national/victoria/washing-and-dressing-our-dead-the-movement-challenging-how-we-grieve-20230510-p5d794.html">ritual</a> that provides meaning during a period of grief. In certain cultures and religions it’s also a process of purification, or preparation for the afterlife.</p> <p>Much has been written about cleaning and clearing out the homes of deceased people. Family members often won’t agree on how to approach such a task. In his <a href="https://theconversation.com/friday-essay-grief-and-things-of-stone-wood-and-wool-136721">essay on death and objects</a>, author Tony Birch writes about his mother clearing out his grandmother’s house.</p> <p>“My mother decided that our first task after her death was to empty out her Housing Commission flat and scrub it clean,” Birch writes.</p> <p>He first laments the move, but later recognises the value of cleaning together before sorting – and treasuring – the items his grandmother left behind.</p> <p>Margaretta Magnuson’s 2017 book, <a href="https://www.google.com.au/books/edition/The_Gentle_Art_of_Swedish_Death_Cleaning/uW00DwAAQBAJ?hl=en&amp;gbpv=1&amp;pg=PT7&amp;printsec=frontcover">The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning</a>, is a humorous and thoughtful introduction to the Swedish movement of <em>döstädning</em>. The book (and subsequent <a href="https://www.sbs.com.au/ondemand/tv-series/the-gentle-art-of-swedish-death-cleaning">reality TV series</a>) has sparked various conversations on death and cleaning, and especially on cleaning before you yourself pass away so you don’t leave a mess for your loved ones.</p> <p>Grave cleaning can be seen as another continuation of caring for the deceased. People who decide to clean the graves of strangers may do so out of <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/society/2022/sep/04/how-gravetok-videos-of-cleaning-headstones-went-viral">respect</a>, or in an attempt to <a href="https://www.buzzfeed.com/alexalisitza/tiktok-woman-cleans-old-gravestones">give them “their name back”</a> (as names on graves become visible following the removal of debris).</p> <h2>Two very different approaches</h2> <p>Williams and McEwen are received quite differently by viewers. Anecdotally, viewers respond more positively to the calmer and more respectful cleaning videos by Williams, who takes time to explain the process while ensuring the correct products are used.</p> <p>Meanwhile, many find McEwen’s videos problematic and criticise her for not adhering to proper graveyard decorum. McEwen makes a spectacle of sites of mourning, such as by pretending to vacuum graves, replacing flowers placed by others and making jokes. Viewers also speculate the products she uses may cause damage to the graves.</p> <p>Perceived intent plays a role in how each creator’s content is received. While Williams focuses on respectfully restoring graves to their former glory, McEwen positions herself as the focus and merely uses the graves for content.</p> <h2>A complex emotional object</h2> <p>Similar to other funerary objects such as coffins and urns, graves are associated with both the person who died and the fact of their death. As such, they are emotionally complex objects that bring both strength and sadness to those left behind.</p> <p>But graves are unique also in that they are private objects of grief exposed in a public context. Anyone visiting the graveyard can view and interact with them. Does that make them “fair game” for content creators?</p> <p>Graves don’t just represent deceased loved ones. They can also act as stand-ins in their absence, becoming stone bodies of sorts. As sociologist Margaret Gibson describes in her book <a href="https://www.mup.com.au/books/objects-of-the-dead-paperback-softback">Objects of the Dead: Mourning and Memory in Everyday Life</a>, “death reconstructs our experience of objects”.</p> <p>“There is the strangeness of realising that things have outlived persons, and, in this regard, the materiality of things is shown to be more permanent than the materiality of the body,” she says.</p> <p>Caring for and cleaning graves can therefore be interpreted as caring for the deceased, by extending their existence through the materiality of their resting place.</p> <p>Psychological researcher <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/1600910X.2018.1521339">Svend Brinkmann asserts</a> artefacts such as graves are “culturally sanctioned”, gaining “significance from a collective system of meaning”.</p> <p>In other words, we as a community create and uphold reverence for such items. This is partly why the desecration of graves is viewed as abhorrent. It is societally understood to be a desecration of the person themselves. It’s also why content creators must tread lightly.</p> <h2>A reason for haunting?</h2> <p>There are ways to interact with gravestones (and even create content) which acknowledge their complexity and connection to their owners.</p> <p>TikTok creator Rosie Grant (<a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@ghostlyarchive?lang=en">@ghostlyarchive</a>) bakes recipes found on headstones and records the process. She has even met with the families of the deceased <a href="https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/food-and-drink/defining-dishes-ghostly-archive-tiktok-b2414122.html">to make the recipes together</a> and learn more about the people behind the engraving-worthy food.</p> <p>However, randomly cleaning the graves of strangers is fraught territory – and rife with potential privacy issues. It isn’t clear whether McEwen seeks permission from loved ones before cleaning graves, but contextually this seems unlikely.</p> <p><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nKkOS2GjCxk">Recent discussions</a> have also uncovered questionable editing in her videos. Some graves in her before-and-after videos have been edited to appear cleaner and to have their structure altered. McEwen’s pink foaming cleaner also appears to be a blue cleaner edited to appear pink, raising even more questions about intent and responsibility.</p> <p>While McEwen claims to be “honouring” lives by cleaning “final resting places”, the consensus from viewers is her actions are dishonourable. As one host <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nKkOS2GjCxk">commented on a in podcast</a> discussing McEwen cleaning a baby’s grave while speaking in a kiddish voice: “F**k you, you’re going to get haunted.”<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/240553/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/edith-jennifer-hill-1018412">Edith Jennifer Hill</a>, Associate Lecturer, Learning &amp; Teaching Innovation, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/flinders-university-972">Flinders University</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/marina-deller-947925">Marina Deller</a>, Casual Academic, Creative Writing and English Literature, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/flinders-university-972">Flinders University</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/grave-cleaning-videos-are-going-viral-on-tiktok-are-they-honouring-the-dead-or-exploiting-them-240553">original article</a>.</em></p>

Caring

Placeholder Content Image

Controversial suicide capsule applications suspended amid investigation

<p>Advocacy groups behind the suicide capsule have suspended the process of taking applications amid a criminal investigation into its first use in Switzerland. </p> <p>In a statement on Sunday, they said that 371 people were “in the process of applying” to use the device, known as the Sarco, as of September 23 and applications were suspended after its first use. </p> <p>The Sarco capsule is designed to allow the person inside to push a button that injects nitrogen gas from a tank underneath into the sealed chamber, allowing the person to fall asleep and then die of suffocation in a few minutes. </p> <p>On September 23, an unidentified 64-year-old woman from the US Midwest, became the first person to use the device in a forest in the northern Schaffhausen region. </p> <p>The president of Switzerland-based The Last Resort, Florian Willet, said at the time that the woman's death was "peaceful, fast, and dignified", although those claims could not be independently verified. </p> <p>On the same day as the woman's death, Swiss Health Minister Elisabeth Baume-Schneider told parliament that use of the Sarco would not be legal.</p> <p>Willet and several others were taken into custody following her death and prosecutors opened an investigation on suspicion of incitement and accessory to suicide.</p> <p>Willet is currently being held in pretrial detention, according to The Last Resort and Exit International, an affiliate founded in Australia over a quarter-century ago. The others who were detained were released from custody. </p> <p>Exit International also clarified that their lawyers in Switzerland believed the use of the device is legal.</p> <p>“Only after the Sarco was used was it learned that Ms Baume-Schneider had addressed the issue,” the advocacy groups said in the statement Sunday.</p> <p>“The timing was a pure coincidence and not our intention.”</p> <p>Switzerland has some of the most permissive laws when it comes to assisted suicide, but the first use of the Sarco has prompted debate among lawmakers. </p> <p>Laws in the country permit assisted suicide, as long as the person takes their own life with no “external assistance” and those who help the person die do not do so for “any self-serving motive”. </p> <p><em>Image: Exit International</em></p> <p> </p>

Legal

Placeholder Content Image

World’s longest treasure hunt ends as Golden Owl finally unearthed in France

<p><span style="font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, 'Segoe UI', Roboto, Oxygen, Ubuntu, Cantarell, 'Open Sans', 'Helvetica Neue', sans-serif;">After more than three decades of mystery and intrigue, the world’s longest-running treasure hunt has come to a thrilling conclusion with the discovery of the elusive Golden Owl. Valued at approximately $240,000, the treasure had captivated the imaginations of thousands since it was first buried in France in the early 1990s.</span></p> <p>The hunt began with the publication of the now-famous book, <em>On the Trail of the Golden Owl</em>, written by communications expert Régis Hauser under the pseudonym “Max Valentin” and illustrated by artist Michel Becker. The 1993 book challenged readers to solve a series of intricate riddles and clues, which, when deciphered, would reveal the owl’s secret location.</p> <p>Despite years of painstaking attempts to crack the mystery, the Golden Owl remained hidden for decades, surviving even its creator. Hauser passed away in 2009, leaving the prize still buried. Michel Becker, who took over the management of the hunt, delivered the long-awaited news on October 3 via an online announcement that sparked a frenzy among treasure hunters: “A potential winning solution is currently being verified.”</p> <p>Two hours later, he confirmed: “Don’t go digging! We confirm that the Golden Owl countermark was unearthed last night.”</p> <p>The treasure hunt’s <a href="https://goldenowlhunt.com/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">official website was also updated with the announcement</a>, bringing an end to a search that has been both thrilling and, for some, overwhelming.</p> <p><strong>The obsession and madness behind the search</strong></p> <p>For over 30 years, the Golden Owl hunt transcended being just a hobby for many treasure hunters and became an all-consuming obsession. While some enjoyed it as a leisurely pursuit, others were driven to extreme lengths – financially, emotionally and mentally. The search for the owl has been linked to personal crises, including financial ruin and broken marriages. At least one individual reportedly ended up in an asylum due to their fixation on solving the hunt’s riddles.</p> <p>The toll wasn’t limited to individuals. Searchers caused considerable disruption across France, digging unauthorised holes in public and private lands. In one eastern French village, the local mayor was forced to plead with hunters to stop digging around its chapel, while in other cases, searchers brought power tools to banks and even considered destroying structures in the hopes of unearthing the treasure.</p> <p><strong>The Golden Owl’s elusive clues</strong></p> <p><em>On the Trail of the Golden Owl</em> contained a complex series of 11 riddles, each paired with a painting by Becker. The riddles, combined with maps, colours and hidden details, challenged readers to work out the owl’s hidden location.</p> <p>Before his death, Hauser revealed three crucial elements to solving the puzzle:</p> <p>The use of maps: Hunters needed to work with maps to narrow down the search area and use a specific map to pinpoint the final zone.</p> <p>A “mega trick”: This was the key to using the sequence of riddles to locate the final area where the owl was hidden.</p> <p>A final hidden riddle: Once in the final zone, hunters had to uncover one last riddle to lead them to the exact spot of the treasure.</p> <p><strong>Joyous celebration among treasure hunters</strong></p> <p>The treasure-hunting community was overjoyed when the news broke, with many expressing their disbelief and excitement. “Finally – liberated!” exclaimed one fan on the hunt’s Discord forum. Another added, “I didn’t think I’d live to see the day.”</p> <p>As of now, the exact location of the owl’s discovery and the identity of the finder remain undisclosed. However, Becker hinted at the complexity involved in concluding this monumental hunt. “Tons of emotions to manage for all those who are responsible for managing the end of this episode and complex logistics to put in place,” he said in a statement on October 6.</p> <p>For now, the Golden Owl, a treasure that has held a generation of sleuths in its grasp, has been unearthed. Yet, the fascination with its story will undoubtedly linger for years to come.</p> <p><em>Images/Illustrations: Michel Becker</em></p>

International Travel

Placeholder Content Image

Iconic Days of Our Lives star dies aged 70

<p>Drake Hogestyn has passed away aged 70. </p> <p>The<em> Days of Our Lives </em>actor, known for his long-running role as John Black passed away on Saturday after a battle with pancreatic cancer, according to a statement shared by his family on Instagram.</p> <p>“It’s with heavy hearts that we announce the passing of Drake Hogestyn,” the statement began.</p> <p>“He was thrown the curve ball of his life when he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, but he faced the challenge with incredible strength and determination.”</p> <p>“After putting up an unbelievable fight, he passed peacefully surrounded by loved ones. He was the most amazing husband, father, papa and actor. He loved performing for the ‘Days’ audience and sharing the stage with the greatest cast, crew, and production team in the business. We love him and we will miss him all the Days of our Lives.”</p> <p>Hogestyn first appeared on the iconic US soap opera in 1986, and played John Black for 38 years. </p> <p>In a statement to<em> Soap Opera Digest, Days Of Our Lives</em> executive producer Ken Corday remembered the actor, who appeared in more than 4,200 episodes of the show. </p> <p>“This is a very difficult one for all of us,” he said. </p> <p>“Hogey was the ultimate team player and there are not sufficient words to express how deeply he will be missed. His impact on our show, personally and professionally, was profound and will forever remain unmatched.”</p> <p>His co-stars and colleagues have also paid their respects on social media. </p> <p>“I’m so saddened by this news,” tweeted Kassie DePaiva, who played Eve on the soap. </p> <p>“One of the kindest people I have ever worked with. What an amazing life he lived. He will be missed. He made the world a better place.”</p> <p>Fellow veteran soap star Nancy Lee Grahn, who plays Alexis on <em>General Hospital</em> tweeted: “My deepest condolences to Drake Hogestyn’s family, friends and fans. What a lovely, lovely gracious man.”</p> <p><em>Image: SplashNews.com/ Shutterstock Editorial</em></p>

Caring

Placeholder Content Image

Olympian's life "a living nightmare" after simple self-check out mistake

<p>A former Olympian has spoken about how her life was ruined after she accidentally failed to scan to items at a self-checkout machine in Walmart. </p> <p>Canadian athlete Meaggan Pettipiece, 48, was arrested on March 28 in Indiana for theft, possession of marijuana and possession of a controlled substance.</p> <p>The charges have since been dropped, but Pettipiece lost her prestigious job as the head coach of the Valparaiso University softball team as a result and says her career and reputation have been ruined. </p> <p>The ordeal began when the self-checkout machine at Walmart reportedly failed to scan the asparagus and ham that Pettipiece intended to purchase. </p> <p>Walmart security saw that she failed to scan the items  — worth a total of $67 — prompting them to call the police despite her having paid $167 for her other groceries.</p> <p>Pettipiece was arrested and when police searched her they found three disposable vapes in her purse, along with two unopened blister packs containing anti-nausea medication Zofran.</p> <p>The former athlete said the vapes did not contain any nicotine or THC, and the anti-nausea pills belonged to an assistant coach who had asked her to keep them in her purse during a softball game, days before her arrest. </p> <p>“We both forgot about them,” Pettipiece told the<em> National Post.</em></p> <p>The outlet reported that earlier this month, her lawyer submitted an application for dismissal that included her account of the incident, proof of her assistant’s prescription, and character reference letters.</p> <p>After reading the application, her charges were dropped by justice officials on September 19, but the damage caused by the incident "changed everything". </p> <p>“It is bittersweet,” she told <em>National Post</em>.</p> <p>“I’m happy, obviously, the charges were dismissed. The sad part is the damage it did to my career. It has changed everything in my life.”</p> <p>Pettipiece resigned as head coach of the softball team shortly after the Walmart incident. </p> <p>"It's been five months, a living nightmare. I lost my career, I lost my job, the life I was building and it's been really difficult."</p> <p>Along with the damage to her career, Pettipiece said the effect on her reputation has been equally heartbreaking. </p> <p>“The softball community is a tight-knit group and it (the news) went through like wildfire,” she said. </p> <p>“You really do learn who the people are that really believe in you and trust you and are truly a friend for you." </p> <p>The former athlete is now living in Ohio with her family, and though the charges against her have been dismissed she is worried the damage "can't be reversed". </p> <p>“The tough thing is, how do you get out to people that you are innocent? And this damage was done for something so ridiculous,” Pettipiece told the outlet.</p> <p>“I’m not sure of the future. For now, I’m going to stay at home and focus on my kids. I’d like to figure out which direction I’m going to go in.”</p> <p><em>Image: Valparaiso University Athletics/ </em><em>ZikG / Shutterstock.com</em></p> <p> </p>

Legal

Placeholder Content Image

Kate Middleton confirms the end of her chemotherapy

<p>The Princess of Wales has confirmed that she has finished chemotherapy and is now focused on staying cancer free. </p> <p>Kate Middleton, who announced in March that she was undergoing preventative chemotherapy for an undisclosed type of cancer, shared the update on social media with a deeply personal message. </p> <p>"As the summer comes to an end, I cannot tell you what a relief it is to have finally completed my chemotherapy treatment," she began in the video, which was shot last month in Norfolk. </p> <p>"The last nine months have been incredibly tough for us as a family. Life as you know it can change in an instant and we have had to find a way to navigate the stormy waters and road unknown," she continued.</p> <p>“The cancer journey is complex, scary and unpredictable for everyone, especially those closest to you.</p> <p>“With humility, it also brings you face to face with your own vulnerabilities in a way you have never considered before, and with that, a new perspective on everything.</p> <p>“This time has above all reminded William and me to reflect and be grateful for the simple yet important things in life, which so many of us often take for granted. Of simply loving and being loved.”</p> <p>Prince William, Prince George, Princess Charlotte and Prince Louis all feature alongside Kate in the video, as they're surrounded by nature, with the couple even showing a rare display of public affection. </p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/reel/C_s6SukNNne/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/reel/C_s6SukNNne/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by The Prince and Princess of Wales (@princeandprincessofwales)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>The Princess said that going forward her focus would be on “doing what I can to stay cancer-free” but was “looking forward to being back at work”, with plans to undertake a light program of engagements until the end of the year. </p> <p>“Although I have finished chemotherapy, my path to healing and full recovery is long and I must continue to take each day as it comes,” she added.</p> <p>“Despite all that has gone before, I enter this new phase of recovery with a renewed sense of hope and appreciation of life.”</p> <p>She then thanked the public for their support, saying how grateful the family were and how they  had “drawn great strength from all those who are helping us at this time”.</p> <p>"Everyone's kindness, empathy and compassion has been truly humbling."</p> <p>“To all those who are continuing their own cancer journey – I remain with you, side by side, hand in hand. Out of darkness, can come light, so let that light shine bright,” she concluded.</p> <p>The Princess of Wales plans to support her family at the Cenotaph in Whitehall on Remembrance Sunday in November and host her annual televised <em>Together At Christmas </em>carol service at Westminster Abbey the following month. </p> <p><em>Images: Instagram/ Kensington Palace</em></p> <p> </p>

Caring

Placeholder Content Image

Readers response: What have you had to cut out of your life to cope with cost of living pressures?

<p>As the cost of living continues to rise, many people have had to cut things out of their day to day spending to cope with the financial struggles. </p> <p>We asked our readers what they have had to cut out of their budgets to cope with cost of living pressures, and the response was overwhelming. Here's what they said. </p> <p><strong>Wendy Oliver</strong> - We don’t eat out often at all… I spend too much in the supermarket.</p> <p><strong>Christine Brooks</strong> - I've cut out steak, good nutritional foods, TV streaming, entertainment, haircuts, new clothes, pets, pool cleaning, and more.</p> <p><strong>Kerrie Dare</strong> - I limit steak meals. I've stopped my haircuts to every 4 months. Internet is getting chopped. I can only afford exercise classes twice a week. I don't eat as much fruit as I used too. I only buy groceries when on special. One bottle of wine per fortnight. One slice of sourdough in the morning, which means the loaf lasts a week. I turn on my washing machine around every 10 days &amp; I have quick showers. No eating out or take away. Maybe one cup of coffee per week with a friend. Movies once every 6 weeks as a social group. No concerts or clubs. I drive only locally, so a tank of petrol lasts 1 month. No weekends away.</p> <p><strong>Jane Dawes</strong> - No coffees, beauty treatments, hairdresser, eating out, takeouts etc. The trouble is not affording to spend on certain items has a flow on effect for businesses. Everyone is suffering. </p> <p><strong>Lois E. Fisk</strong> - Going out to eat or see movies in the cinema or live plays or new clothes. I shop at the least expensive grocery stores as much as possible, and good cuts of meat rarely happen.</p> <p><strong>Janice Stenning</strong> - Don't go to the hairdressers as often and don't buy as many clothes. </p> <p><strong>Debra Dugar </strong>- Thinking about dropping my extras cover of my insurance. By the time I pay for it, I can't afford the gap you have to pay.</p> <p><strong>Robyn Lee </strong>- Living in my own house. I now live with my family. </p> <p><strong>Rhondda Hughes</strong> - Well, petrol is expensive so I have to really think if I can afford to visit anyone. I can’t eat meat much and even vegetables can be expensive. We have three chickens so they give us eggs but good quality eggs and healthy chickens require money too. Fortunately I live in Perth so, in comparison to other states, it isn’t as cold however the cost of heating is a significant consideration and therefore I just tend to go to bed.</p> <div style="font-family: inherit;"><strong>Felicity Jill Murphy</strong> - Stopped going out to shopping centres. That's where I spend money unnecessarily.</div> <div style="font-family: inherit;"><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></div>

Money & Banking

Placeholder Content Image

"Ding dong, the witch is dead": Daughter's scathing obituary for late mother

<p>A woman has taken her last chance to call out her "terrorising" mother in a damning obituary. </p> <p>Florence “Flo” Harrelson, 65, died back in February, although her notice of death wasn't published until August 29th by her estranged daughter Christina Novak.</p> <p>The delay in the obituary came as a result of Novak not finding out about her mother's death until months after she passed. </p> <p>Novak noted in the obituary that her mother, a former U.S. Marine who served as a Maine prison guard, died “on Feb. 22, 2024, without family by her side due to burnt bridges and a wake of destruction left in her path.”</p> <p>Her daughter confirmed that Flo had been suffering from cancer but ultimately died of heart failure.</p> <p>She went on to say that it had been 10 years since she spoke to her estranged mother. </p> <p>“Florence did not want an obituary or anyone including family to know she died,” reads the obituary.</p> <p>“That’s because even in death, she wanted those she terrorised to still be living in fear looking over their shoulders. So, this isn’t so much an obituary but more of a public service announcement.”</p> <p>She also shared the obit to Facebook, and punctuated it with a line from The Wizard of Oz, writing, “Ding dong, the witch is dead.”</p> <p>Novak told the <em><a href="https://www.bangordailynews.com/2024/08/30/central-maine/central-maine-culture/maine-wake-of-destruction-obituary/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Bangor Daily News</a></em> she was “giggling to myself” while composing the obit, admitting she originally set out to write a traditional obituary, but kept drifting into sarcasm.</p> <p>Novak even considered listing the ways in which her mother wronged her relatives, before stopping short but saying the reaction to the obituary was “priceless.”</p> <p><em>Image credits: Facebook</em></p>

Family & Pets

Placeholder Content Image

Sam Neill moved to tears by simple question

<p>Sam Neill has unexpectedly broken down in tears over one question posed to him by a university student. </p> <p>The <em>Jurassic Park </em>actor was the surprise guest during the premiere of ABC's new series, <em>The Assembly, </em>based off the UK show which sees high-profile figures being interviewed by a class of university students who are all autistic. </p> <p>The students can ask whatever they want, and one student, Abby brought the actor to tears with her question. </p> <p>“What’s the best lesson you learned from your parents?” she asked. </p> <p>“Ooft, wow. That’s a really interesting question … A really, really interesting question,” Neill replied, before pausing as he began tearing up. </p> <p>“I don’t know why that question has moved me so much, but it has.”</p> <p>The actor then went on to explain that his parents were  “of the generation that went through a lot” – including the Great Depression and World War One, in which his maternal grandfather was killed –  leaving both his parents “very stoic”.</p> <p>“And I’d done a year of university and I’d done bugger all. I was acting in plays and trying to find a girlfriend, you know … so it came to exam time and I realised I’d done almost no work,” Neill recalled.</p> <p>“It got me very anxious. Anyway, I got home and Mum said, ‘How are you, darling?’ and I said, ‘I think I’m having a breakdown, I’ve got exams in a couple of weeks …’ and she just looked at me and said, ‘Well, you’re just going to have to pull yourself together’.”</p> <p>He continued: “And I think that’s the best lesson I learned from her. Sometimes you just have to pull yourself together. It’s a tough lesson, but a good one – and thank you for that question." </p> <p>Elsewhere during the interview, he also spoke candidly about his recent blood cancer battle, and while he is in remission after a year of chemotherapy, he still requires monthly treatments which he'll have to do for the rest of his life. </p> <p>One student asked him, "what motivated you to keep going, and did you have anyone supporting you through it?”</p> <p>He admitted that while it had been a "pretty brutal" process, he is grateful for all the treatments keeping him alive "and living is much better than the other thing.”</p> <p><em>Images: ABC</em></p>

Family & Pets

Placeholder Content Image

Five-time Olympian found dead at just 50

<p>Five-time Olympic cyclist Daniela Larreal Chirinos has been found dead in a Las Vegas apartment at the age of 50. </p> <p>Chirinos, who represented Venezuela at five Olympic Games, was found after employees raised the alarm when she failed to show up for work. </p> <p>While an official cause of death is yet to be released, Venezuelan media have speculated that she died of asphyxiation on August 11th after a preliminary autopsy found solid food remains in her trachea.</p> <p>Larreal was the only Venezuelan athlete to ever compete in five Olympics, representing her country at Barcelona 1992, Atlanta 1996, Sydney 2000, Athens 2004, and London 2012.</p> <p>Throughout her stellar cycling career, she won several gold medals at local and international events, and earned four Olympic diplomas, given to the top eight finalists in Olympic events. </p> <p>Chairman of the Venezuelan Cycling Federation Eliezer Rojas paid tribute to Larreal, saying she was “not only a champion in cycling but a symbol of perseverance, dedication and passion”.</p> <p>“With a career full of success, she inspired generations of cyclists and left a mark on every competition she participated in. Her legacy will endure in the history of Venezuelan cycling and her memory will live on in every pedal strike we take in her honour.”</p> <p>“Her unexpected departure leaves an irreparable void in the hearts of all of us who had the honour of knowing her and following her career.”</p> <p><em>Image credits: Martin Alipaz/EPA/Shutterstock Editorial </em></p>

Caring

Placeholder Content Image

Distraught wife of cricket legend reveals cause of death

<p>The grieving wife of late cricket legend Graham Thorpe has spoken out after her husband's untimely <a href="https://oversixty.com.au/health/caring/tragic-news-cricket-legend-dies-at-just-55" target="_blank" rel="noopener">death</a>, revealing that he tragically took his own life. </p> <p>After an illustrious cricket career in the UK, Thorpe died on August 5th at just 55 years old, leaving behind his wife and four children. </p> <p>Thorpe had previously been hospitalised in May 2022 following a suicide attempt, but made a full recovery. </p> <p>His wife Amanda has spoken out about her husband's mental illness, sharing how he had been suffering for many years. </p> <p>“Despite having a wife and two daughters whom he loved and who loved him, he did not get better,” Amanda told <em>The Times</em>.</p> <p>“He was so unwell in recent times and he really did believe that we would be better off without him.”</p> <p>She added: “We are devastated that he acted on that and took his own life.”</p> <p>Amanda said Graham had suffered from major depression and anxiety “for a couple of years”, explaining, “Despite glimpses of hope and of the old Graham, he continued to suffer from depression and anxiety, which at times got very severe."</p> <p>“We supported him as a family and he tried many, many treatments but unfortunately none of them really seemed to work."</p> <p>“Graham was renowned as someone who was very mentally strong on the field and he was in good physical health. But mental illness is a real disease and can affect anyone.”</p> <p>Following his sudden death, the England and Wales Cricket Board released a statement that said, “It is with great sadness that we share the news that Graham Thorpe, MBE, has passed away."</p> <p>“There seem to be no appropriate words to describe the deep shock we feel at Graham’s death."</p> <p>“More than one of England’s finest-ever batters, he was a beloved member of the cricket family and revered by fans all over the world."</p> <p><em><strong>Need to talk to someone? Don't go it alone. Call Lif</strong><strong>eline on 0800 543 354 o</strong><strong>r <a href="https://www.lifeline.org.nz" target="_blank" rel="noopener">lifeline.org.nz</a></strong></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Colorsport/Shutterstock Editorial</em></p>

Caring

Placeholder Content Image

Woman “bullied” on plane over budget seating trick

<p dir="ltr">A young woman has recalled a flight from hell when she was “bullied” by a couple who were trying to utilise a seating hack that went viral on TikTok. </p> <p dir="ltr">The solo traveller took to Reddit to recount the story and ask social media users if she was in the wrong for her action. </p> <p dir="ltr">The woman began by saying she usually pays more to select her plane seat ahead of time, but a medical emergency on another plane had her waiting on standby and left with no option other than to sit in a middle seat.</p> <p dir="ltr">When she was finally able to board, she was greeted by a couple who had purchased both the window and aisle seats in a bid to have more space, utilising a travel “trick” that has been popular on TikTok.</p> <p dir="ltr">The method, which has been dubbed the 'poor man's business class', usually leaves travellers with an empty middle seat and more space, and few travellers opt to pick a middle seat. </p> <p dir="ltr">“When I got to my row the man and woman were chatting and sharing a snack... it was obvious they were together. I mentioned to the man that I'm in the middle, and he got up to let me in,” the unsuspecting traveller wrote on Reddit.  </p> <p dir="ltr">“I asked them if they would prefer to sit together, I said I was totally okay with that. The woman reacted rudely to this and said ‘you're not supposed to be sitting here anyway’.”</p> <p dir="ltr">After noticing how the plane was full, she offered to show the pair her new ticket with the correct seat number on it.</p> <p dir="ltr">“She flicked her hand at my ticket and made a disgusted sound. I offered again if they wanted to sit together to which she didn't reply, her partner said it's okay and... made some small talk,” she continued. </p> <p dir="ltr">The man’s girlfriend then interrupted their conversation to ask,”'Did you use one of those third party websites to book your flight? It's so frustrating when people cheap out to inconvenience others.”</p> <p dir="ltr">The American woman explained that she had booked her flight directly and she had been placed on standby like everyone else and didn't choose the middle seat - she was assigned it.</p> <p dir="ltr">She then tried to keep the peace by refusing to engage with the furious woman.  </p> <p dir="ltr">“I was so done with her attitude, I put my headphones on and attempted to do my own thing,” she explained.</p> <p dir="ltr">But the “entitled” girlfriend wasn't letting it go, as the woman explained, “This woman kept reaching over me and tapping her partner and trying to talk to him in a way that was super intrusive.”</p> <p dir="ltr">“I could tell even her partner was trying to engage her less so that she would hopefully stop, but she didn't.”</p> <p dir="ltr">“I think they tried to pull that tactic where they don't sit together on purpose...hoping no one will sit between them. But on full flights it doesn't work. And even so - it's not the other person's fault.”</p> <p dir="ltr">The traveller's post was met with hundreds of comments slamming the girlfriend’s behaviour, as one person wrote, “It's like a toddler having a tantrum.”</p> <p dir="ltr">“She was disappointed and a total a**hole. Gross entitled people,” another added. </p> <p dir="ltr">Another person applauded the traveller’s level-headed behaviour, writing, “Wow! You are my hero for keeping it classy - I’m afraid I would not have been as kind as you.”</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p>

Travel Trouble

Placeholder Content Image

Six-year-old denied passport over trademarked name

<p>A mother from the UK has been left "absolutely devastated" after her six-year-old daughter's passport application was denied because she is named after a famous character in the fantasy series Game of Thrones. </p> <p>Lucy, a 39-year-old mum from South West England, told the <em><a href="https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/c4ng1xd06xwo" target="_blank" rel="noopener">BBC</a></em> that things went downhill when she started planning their “dream” trip to Disneyland Paris as a family and needed to get her daughter a passport. </p> <p>She said that the initial application to get her daughter, Khaleesi, 6, was unable to be processed, with officials telling her she needed approval from Warner Brothers because they own the name’s trademark.</p> <p>“I was absolutely devastated, we were so looking forward to our first holiday together,” Lucy said.</p> <p>“I had a letter come through from the Passport Office, saying her name is trademarked by Warner Brothers,” she said. </p> <p>“It was the first I’ve heard of such a thing — I was astonished.”</p> <p>After receiving legal advice, the mum learned her daughter was legally allowed to use that name, and forwarded that information along to the Passport Office.</p> <p>“I didn’t understand and felt frustrated. If she could get a birth certificate, would something not have been flagged up then?” she said.</p> <p>“I never thought you could trademark a name,” she added.</p> <p>The Passport Office reportedly later called Lucy to apologise for the error and said they would continue with the process of little Khaleesi's passport. </p> <p>Lucy said she believes the problem was only solved because she complained on social media.</p> <p>“If I hadn’t posted this on social media, nothing would have been done. I would have been stuck, not knowing what to do,” she said, adding that others had reached out saying they’d experienced something similar.</p> <p>Lucy now said she is waiting until her daughter’s passport arrives before booking a new trip to Disneyland Paris.</p> <p>“I am hoping the passport will be issued soon and was promised that they would call back in a few days to see if it had progressed,” she told the <em>BBC</em>.</p> <p>She also hopes her story may help others stuck in a similar situation, saying,  “I think there might be other people in this situation, that they may have had their passports declined recently because of something like this. Hopefully, they now know it can be resolved."</p> <p><em>Image credits: HBO / BBC / Family Handout</em></p>

Legal

Placeholder Content Image

Cancer diagnosis can be devastating, but for some it gives permission to live more radically

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/kevin-dew-577291">Kevin Dew</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/te-herenga-waka-victoria-university-of-wellington-1200">Te Herenga Waka — Victoria University of Wellington</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/alex-broom-121063">Alex Broom</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/chris-cunningham-1534054">Chris Cunningham</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/te-kunenga-ki-purehuroa-massey-university-806">Te Kunenga ki Pūrehuroa – Massey University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/elizabeth-dennett-1532423">Elizabeth Dennett</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-otago-1304">University of Otago</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/kerry-chamberlain-103714">Kerry Chamberlain</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/te-kunenga-ki-purehuroa-massey-university-806">Te Kunenga ki Pūrehuroa – Massey University</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/richard-egan-400188">Richard Egan</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-otago-1304">University of Otago</a></em></p> <p>A diagnosis of life-limiting cancer can be overwhelming and cause feelings of panic and anxiety. But for some people, it provides a license to live life differently, including quitting toxic jobs and becoming more adventurous.</p> <p>In our <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/1467-9566.13797">recently published research</a>, we sought to understand the impact of a cancer diagnosis and subsequent experiences for cancer survivors.</p> <p>We talked with 81 New Zealanders (23 Māori and 58 non-Māori) who had lived longer than expected with a life-limiting or terminal diagnosis of cancer (four to 32 years since first diagnosis), and 25 people who were identified as their supporters.</p> <p>We found there are vastly different ways in which people experience and respond to a cancer diagnosis, but for some it’s a prompt to make significant changes. Of the 81 participants, 26 expressed the view, unsolicited, that cancer had some positive impact on their lives – without downplaying the negative impacts it could have as well.</p> <h2>A licence to change</h2> <p>Being told you only have limited time left to live can undoubtedly be a shock. But it can lead to profound change.</p> <p>It’s not uncommon for people who receive a serious diagnosis to draw up a “<a href="https://theconversation.com/paris-in-spring-bali-in-winter-how-bucket-lists-help-cancer-patients-handle-life-and-death-225682">bucket list</a>”. Some people in our study took the opportunity to travel or move to a new home.</p> <p>For others, the diagnosis provided a chance to rethink their lives and make more significant changes to the way they lived. They decided to be culturally more adventurous and to take up new skills.</p> <p>Many of these people quit their jobs or changed to jobs that suited them better. Many changed their relationships with the people around them. One talked about showing more affection for his children, another was kinder and stopped fretting over small things.</p> <p>Some decided to be more selective and no longer be around people who were negative. Others took up new hobbies or crafts which they felt were healing. For one person, the cancer diagnosis provided the impetus to look at things and people differently, which they thought would not have happened otherwise.</p> <p>Individuals could also undergo a transformation to become what they felt they were meant to be in life. One person, given two months to live, embraced rongoā (Māori traditional healing), including its spiritual side. They now love their “journey” and feel this was what they were “supposed to do”.</p> <p>For many, a diagnosis of cancer gave them license to be different people and to resist conforming to social norms, including having a job, being thrifty or not taking risks.</p> <h2>Disrupting diagnoses</h2> <p>One person, given only months to live, moved out of her flat, gave away her possessions, quit her job that she described was toxic, and returned home to say goodbye to her family.</p> <p>Most importantly for her, she worked on experiencing “joy” – after receiving the diagnosis, she realised she had lost it. But she continues to live many years later. After a while, she had to find a new flat, get a new job and the recovery of her joy was challenged:</p> <blockquote> <p>I had to start working again. And, of course, with working again, joy goes down, time goes down, rest goes down, spirituality goes down.</p> </blockquote> <p>But not everyone has the opportunity to change. Some peoples’ lives were limited because of the physical effects of the cancer, its treatment, or because of their personal, social or financial resources.</p> <p>Some go to great lengths to ensure their lives change as little as possible after diagnosis to maintain a sense of normality.</p> <h2>Why we need to know</h2> <p>Given the fear a cancer diagnosis can elicit, it is important to see there are different ways of responding.</p> <p>It is also worth knowing there are people who live longer than expected. Many people in our study were given just months to live, but one woman was still alive 12 years after being told she had a year left.</p> <p>Beyond that, this research documents how the disruption produced by a cancer diagnosis can prompt people to breach social norms. Where people have the capacity and resources to change, those around them and their health professionals can support them in taking opportunities to live life differently.</p> <p>We heard people say they think of their cancer as a friend or an amazing opportunity. Some even felt thankful.</p> <p>The possibility of cancer providing opportunities for some in no way diminishes the grief or a sense of loss, fear and anxiety that can accompany such diagnoses.</p> <p>Our research supports a reframing of cancer narratives, to consider ways of tempering the negative impacts of a diagnosis – while remaining cognisant of the struggle that can follow such news, and the variability in people’s capacity to engage with that struggle.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/233782/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/kevin-dew-577291">Kevin Dew</a>, Professor of Sociology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/te-herenga-waka-victoria-university-of-wellington-1200">Te Herenga Waka — Victoria University of Wellington</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/alex-broom-121063">Alex Broom</a>, Professor of Sociology &amp; Director, Sydney Centre for Healthy Societies, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/chris-cunningham-1534054">Chris Cunningham</a>, Professor of Maori &amp; Public Health, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/te-kunenga-ki-purehuroa-massey-university-806">Te Kunenga ki Pūrehuroa – Massey University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/elizabeth-dennett-1532423">Elizabeth Dennett</a>, Associate Professor in Surgery, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-otago-1304">University of Otago</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/kerry-chamberlain-103714">Kerry Chamberlain</a>, Professor of Social and Health Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/te-kunenga-ki-purehuroa-massey-university-806">Te Kunenga ki Pūrehuroa – Massey University</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/richard-egan-400188">Richard Egan</a>, Associate Professor in Health Promotion, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-otago-1304">University of Otago</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/cancer-diagnosis-can-be-devastating-but-for-some-it-gives-permission-to-live-more-radically-233782">original article</a>.</em></p>

Body