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Nicole Kidman reveals her past struggles with bullying

<p>Nicole Kidman has revealed how before she was a household name and an award-winning performer, she was bullied and teased relentlessly through her childhood.</p> <p>The Aussie actress opened up about her struggles in the new documentary series, <span id="U8417448510243ZD"><em>In Vogue: The 90s</em> on Disney+, </span>which gives viewers an inside look at the fashion world during the decade of supermodels.</p> <p>The 57-year-old admitted that it wasn’t until the fashion world invited her into its inner-circle that she felt comfortable in her own skin due to being bullied throughout her childhood.</p> <p>“I mean, I was a red-headed, fair-skinned girl who was almost 5’11 at the age of 14,” she said.</p> <p>“I would get teased, and it wasn’t kind. So every time I was given access to that whole world, you feel like a little girl who’s been given the chance to step into this sort of fantasy world.”</p> <p>As Kidman rose to fame in the 90s, she was approached by legendary designer John Galliano, who wanted to dress her for the 1997 Oscars.</p> <p>Revealing what was going through her mind when the iconic designer reached out, Kidman delved into some of her struggles from her youth regarding her body image and what it meant to her to have a dress designed specifically for her.</p> <p>“Can you believe it?” Kidman rhetorically asked. “My whole life, I wanted to be 5’2” and curvaceous and suddenly, being 5’11 and completely sort of skinny and flat chested was like, ‘Great, we can dress you.’ ”</p> <p>“I grew up watching Audrey Hepburn and Katharine Hepburn and Grace Kelly — all these women whose style was created with the designers that they’re affiliated with,” Kidman continued, speaking of ushering in a new era in red carpet fashion.</p> <p>“They just loved fashion. So I remember thinking, but of course, this should be brought into Hollywood now, and we should be wearing the things that are made in these gorgeous little salons in Paris. Because that’s what they used to do, so why aren’t we still doing it?”</p> <p><em>Image credits: Instagram</em></p>

Family & Pets

TikTok couple slammed for leaving toddlers unattended in cruise cabin

<p>TikTok Influencers Matt and Abby Howard have been slammed online for their controversial parenting choice while on a family vacation. </p> <p>In a now deleted video, the couple explained that they had brought their sons Griffin, 2, and August, 1 on a family cruise, and they went to dinner without the boys, but monitored the room through FaceTime. </p> <p>"So we ended up taking them for 5 nights and it became apparent that they weren't enjoying it and therefore we weren't either," they said in the caption. </p> <p>"So THEN we switched our dinner time to AFTER their bedtime and FaceTimed the monitors while we ate."</p> <p>Abby noted that baby monitors "don't work on board unless you're only like 10 feet away", adding that their dinnertime solution worked out "much better for everyone" </p> <p>Social media users were quick to respond to their decision, with many highlighting the safety concerns. </p> <p>"They literally could not have gotten to them fast enough if anything had happened and I cannot stop thinking about that. It’s sickening," one wrote on Reddit. </p> <p>"It's literally common sense that you do not leave a baby alone unsupervised," another added. </p> <p>"The fact that they would so willingly leave their children in an unfamiliar environment completely alone is shocking," another added. </p> <p>"Are they seriously that f****** dumb? Do they not watch the news, have they not seen what happened to Madeline McCann?" a fourth wrote. </p> <p>Following the controversy, the couple released a video claiming that a family member was always with the children while they were at dinner, although they didn't clarify who. </p> <p>"We take our roles as parents extremely seriously and we love our children more than anything in the entire world, and we're very protective of our kids," Matt said in the video. </p> <p>"We had someone with our children at all times on this boat," he continued adding that the speculation surrounding them is "completely untrue". </p> <p>"I do want to clarify that we have not, would not, will not ever leave our children unattended. We would would never, ever want to put them in harms way in anyway," Abby added. </p> <p>She explained that her family would "tag team" to help the couple out with watching their children. </p> <p>Viewers were quick to speculate whether they were telling the truth, while others were glad they clarified. </p> <p>"Thanks for the clarification because it did come off like the boys were alone- context is everything," one wrote. </p> <p>"I hope this is the truth," another added. </p> <p>"For them to post about it like it's some genius parenting hack is just wild," a third wrote. </p> <p><em>Image: Instagram</em></p>

Family & Pets

Readers response: Do you find technology has made travel easier or more complicated?

<p>When it comes to travelling, advancements in technology over the years have made the world much more accessible. </p> <p>However, sometimes tech can backfire and leave you lost or stranded. </p> <p>We asked our readers if they find technology has made travel easier or more complicated, and the response was overwhelming. Here's what they said. </p> <p><strong>Dawn Douglas</strong> - Easier by far. You can find hotels, cafes, restaurants, tours and so on.</p> <p><strong>Christine James</strong> - Easier, but we would still rather book through a travel agent. It can be good for research to where you are going though.</p> <p><strong>Brian Adams</strong> - Travel without a smartphone is nearly impossible! There’s no other option to get around sometimes!</p> <p><strong>June Maynard</strong> - More complicated. I'm glad I'm married to an IT tech guy! I leave it all up to him.</p> <p><strong>Pat Isaacs</strong> - Everything seems more complicated with technology for me!!</p> <p><strong>Karen Salvietti </strong>- Much easier to get around with technology overseas.</p> <p><strong>Val Goodwin</strong> - Far more complicated for me, I'm technically challenged lol.</p> <p><strong>Rosemary Miles</strong> - I’m 81 and technology has made everything easier for me. I travel overseas twice a year and hope to be able to keep doing it for a few years longer. I’m spending the grandkids’ inheritance!</p> <p><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p>

Travel Trouble

Why do I need to take some medicines with food?

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/mary-bushell-919262">Mary Bushell</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-canberra-865">University of Canberra</a></em></p> <p>Have you ever been instructed to take your medicine with food and wondered why? Perhaps you’ve wondered if you really need to?</p> <p>There are varied reasons, and sometimes complex science and chemistry, behind why you may be advised to take a medicine with food.</p> <p>To complicate matters, some similar medicines need to be taken differently. The antibiotic amoxicillin with clavulanic acid (sold as Amoxil Duo Forte), for example, is recommended to be taken with food, while amoxicillin alone (sold as Amoxil), can be taken with or without food.</p> <p>Different brands of the same medicine may also have different recommendations when it comes to taking it with food.</p> <h2>Food impacts drug absorption</h2> <p>Food can affect how fast and how much a drug is absorbed into the body in up to <a href="https://academic.oup.com/jpp/article-abstract/71/4/510/6122024?login=false">40% of medicines</a> taken orally.</p> <p>When you have food in your stomach, the makeup of the digestive juices change. This includes things like the fluid volume, thickness, pH (which becomes less acidic with food), surface tension, movement and how much salt is in your bile. These changes can impair or enhance drug absorption.</p> <p>Eating a meal also delays how fast the contents of the stomach move into the small intestine – this is known as <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC9505616/">gastric emptying</a>. The small intestine has a large surface area and rich blood supply – and this is the primary site of drug absorption.</p> <p>Eating a larger meal, or one with lots of fibre, delays gastric emptying more than a smaller meal. Sometimes, health professionals will advise you to take a medicine with food, to help your body absorb the drug more slowly.</p> <p>But if a drug can be taken with or without food – such as paracetamol – and you want it to work faster, take it on an empty stomach.</p> <h2>Food can make medicines more tolerable</h2> <p>Have you ever taken a medicine on an empty stomach and felt nauseated soon after? Some medicines can cause stomach upsets.</p> <p>Metformin, for example, is a drug that reduces blood glucose and treats type 2 diabetes and polycystic ovary syndrome. It commonly causes gastrointestinal symptoms, with <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4452716/">one in four users affected</a>. To combat these side effects, it is generally recommended to be taken with food.</p> <p>The same <a href="https://amhonline.amh.net.au/auth">advice</a> is given for corticosteroids (such as prednisolone/prednisone) and certain antibiotics (such as doxycycline).</p> <p>Taking some medicines with food makes them more tolerable and improves the chance you’ll take it for the duration it’s prescribed.</p> <h2>Can food make medicines safer?</h2> <p>Ibuprofen is one of the most widely used over-the-counter medicines, with around one in five Australians reporting use <a href="https://www.abs.gov.au/statistics/health/health-conditions-and-risks/medications/latest-release">within a two-week period</a>.</p> <p>While effective for pain and inflammation, ibuprofen can impact the stomach by inhibiting protective prostaglandins, increasing the risk of <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1586/14737175.6.11.1643#d1e212">bleeding, ulceration and perforation</a> with long-term use.</p> <p>But there <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4574824/">isn’t enough research</a> to show taking ibuprofen with food reduces this risk.</p> <p>Prolonged use may also affect kidney function, particularly in those with pre-existing conditions or dehydration.</p> <p>The <a href="https://amhonline.amh.net.au/auth">Australian Medicines Handbook</a>, which guides prescribers about medicine usage and dosage, advises taking ibuprofen (sold as Nurofen and Advil) with a glass of water – or with a meal if it upsets your stomach.</p> <p><a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4574824/">A systematic review published in 2015</a> found food delays the transit of ibuprofen to the small intestine and absorption, which delays therapeutic effect and the time before pain relief. It also found taking short courses of ibuprofen without food reduced the need for additional doses.</p> <p>To reduce the risk of ibuprofen causing damage to your stomach or kidneys, use the lowest effective dose for the shortest duration, stay hydrated and avoid taking other <a href="https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/health/conditionsandtreatments/medications-non-steroidal-anti-inflammatory-drugs">non-steroidal anti-inflammatory medicines</a> at the same time.</p> <p>For people who use ibuprofen for prolonged periods and are at higher risk of gastrointestinal side effects (such as people with a history of ulcers or older adults), your prescriber may start you on a <a href="https://australianprescriber.tg.org.au/articles/peptic-ulcer-disease-and-non-steroidal-anti-inflammatory-drugs.html">proton pump inhibitor</a>, a medicine that reduces stomach acid and protects the stomach lining.</p> <h2>How much food do you need?</h2> <p>When you need to take a medicine with food, how much is enough?</p> <p>Sometimes a full glass of milk or a couple of crackers may be enough, for medicines such as prednisone/prednisolone.</p> <p>However, most head-to-head studies that compare the effects of a medicine “with food” and without, usually use a heavy meal to define “with food”. So, a cracker may not be enough, particularly for those with a sensitive stomach. A more substantial meal that includes a mix of fat, protein and carbohydrates is generally advised.</p> <p>Your health professional can advise you on which of your medicines need to be taken with food and how they interact with your digestive system.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/235782/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/mary-bushell-919262">Mary Bushell</a>, Clinical Associate Professor in Pharmacy, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-canberra-865">University of Canberra</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Shutterstock</em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-do-i-need-to-take-some-medicines-with-food-235782">original article</a>.</em></p>

Body

Jon Bon Jovi praised for talking woman off bridge

<p><strong><em>Content warning: This article contains mentions of suicide.</em></strong></p> <p>Jon Bon Jovi has helped to persuade a woman standing on the ledge of a bridge in Nashville to come back over the railing, likely saving her life. </p> <p>The Metro Nashville Police Department revealed that the encounter happened on Tuesday night on the Seigenthaler Pedestrian Bridge. </p> <p>The rock star was filming a music video for his song <em>The People's House </em>on the bridge, when he spotted the woman on the ledge, according to the <em>New York Post</em>. </p> <p>Surveillance footage shared by the city's police department on X showed the singer approaching the woman, alongside another bystander and not long after they helped pull her over the railing and away from danger. </p> <p>After the woman was safe, she and Bon Jovi hugged. </p> <p>"A shout out to @jonbonjovi & his team for helping a woman on the Seigenthaler Ped Bridge Tue night," the Metro Nashville Police Department shared on X.</p> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <p dir="ltr" lang="en">A shout out to <a href="https://twitter.com/jonbonjovi?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@jonbonjovi</a> & his team for helping a woman on the Seigenthaler Ped Bridge Tue night. Bon Jovi helped persuade her to come off the ledge over the Cumberland River to safety. "It takes all of us to help keep each other safe,"--Chief John Drake <a href="https://t.co/1YejKJ2WgM">https://t.co/1YejKJ2WgM</a></p> <p>— Metro Nashville PD (@MNPDNashville) <a href="https://twitter.com/MNPDNashville/status/1833970989354348832?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">September 11, 2024</a></p></blockquote> <p>"Bon Jovi helped persuade her to come off the ledge over the Cumberland River to safety. 'It takes all of us to help keep each other safe,'--Chief John Drake."</p> <p>The bridge was completely open to the public at the time Bon Jovi was filming his music video. </p> <p>While the singer told The Post that he won't be making any public comments out of respect for the person and their privacy, another source told them that Bon Jovi did what any person who found themselves in that situation would've done. </p> <p><em>Images: Metropolitan Nashville Police Department</em></p> <p> </p>

Caring

Kate Middleton confirms the end of her chemotherapy

<p>The Princess of Wales has confirmed that she has finished chemotherapy and is now focused on staying cancer free. </p> <p>Kate Middleton, who announced in March that she was undergoing preventative chemotherapy for an undisclosed type of cancer, shared the update on social media with a deeply personal message. </p> <p>"As the summer comes to an end, I cannot tell you what a relief it is to have finally completed my chemotherapy treatment," she began in the video, which was shot last month in Norfolk. </p> <p>"The last nine months have been incredibly tough for us as a family. Life as you know it can change in an instant and we have had to find a way to navigate the stormy waters and road unknown," she continued.</p> <p>“The cancer journey is complex, scary and unpredictable for everyone, especially those closest to you.</p> <p>“With humility, it also brings you face to face with your own vulnerabilities in a way you have never considered before, and with that, a new perspective on everything.</p> <p>“This time has above all reminded William and me to reflect and be grateful for the simple yet important things in life, which so many of us often take for granted. Of simply loving and being loved.”</p> <p>Prince William, Prince George, Princess Charlotte and Prince Louis all feature alongside Kate in the video, as they're surrounded by nature, with the couple even showing a rare display of public affection. </p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/reel/C_s6SukNNne/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/reel/C_s6SukNNne/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by The Prince and Princess of Wales (@princeandprincessofwales)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>The Princess said that going forward her focus would be on “doing what I can to stay cancer-free” but was “looking forward to being back at work”, with plans to undertake a light program of engagements until the end of the year. </p> <p>“Although I have finished chemotherapy, my path to healing and full recovery is long and I must continue to take each day as it comes,” she added.</p> <p>“Despite all that has gone before, I enter this new phase of recovery with a renewed sense of hope and appreciation of life.”</p> <p>She then thanked the public for their support, saying how grateful the family were and how they had “drawn great strength from all those who are helping us at this time”.</p> <p>"Everyone's kindness, empathy and compassion has been truly humbling."</p> <p>“To all those who are continuing their own cancer journey – I remain with you, side by side, hand in hand. Out of darkness, can come light, so let that light shine bright,” she concluded.</p> <p>The Princess of Wales plans to support her family at the Cenotaph in Whitehall on Remembrance Sunday in November and host her annual televised <em>Together At Christmas </em>carol service at Westminster Abbey the following month. </p> <p><em>Images: Instagram/ Kensington Palace</em></p> <p> </p>

Caring

Strangers lock toddler in plane bathroom to stop her tantrums

<p>The video of a controversial incident on a plane has caused outrage, as two women reprimanded a screaming toddler by locking her in the bathroom on the aircraft. </p> <p>On a Juneyao Airlines flight from Guiyang to Shanghai, China, in late August, a one-year-old child, who was travelling with her grandparents, reportedly sobbed non-stop during the nearly three-hour flight according to the <a href="https://nypost.com/2024/08/30/lifestyle/strangers-lock-crying-tot-in-airplane-bathroom-to-educate-her/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><em>NY Post</em></a>. </p> <p>After being fed up with the toddler's tantrum, two women who were strangers to the family reportedly transported her to the bathroom to “educate her.”</p> <p>Shockingly, the child’s grandmother consented to the treatment.</p> <p>The punitive pair then shared the video of this alleged “potty training” on Douyin, China’s version of TikTok.</p> <p>In the clip, the women can be seen seated in the locked lavatory with the screaming infant, as one of the women is heard saying, “If you stop crying, aunty will take you back to grandma” and “We won’t let you out unless you stop crying.”</p> <p>As the girl stopped crying, the woman filming the video picked her up and told her: “If you make any noise again, we’ll come back (to the bathroom).”</p> <p>One of the women was initially proud of her cruel and unusual-seeming form of discipline, as she wrote that the tantrum was so disruptive that “many passengers were using tissues to block their ears” while others “had moved to the back of the plane to escape the noise.”</p> <p>According to a statement from the airline, the little girl's mother, who was not travelling with them, reportedly sympathised with the self-appointed aeroplane posse’s behaviour.</p> <p>Since the video went viral, and was subsequently deleted, Juneyao Airlines’ reps have since condemned the pairs’ actions and apologised for the incident and “oversight of the crew”.</p> <p>Despite the video being wiped from the social media site, many were quick to slam the behaviour of the women, saying their discipline was completely unacceptable. </p> <p>“Adults in their 30s can have emotional breakdowns, but people don’t allow toddlers to have theirs,” one person commented, </p> <p>Another wrote, “The grandmother and the two aunts should be sued, and social services should intervene. If there are parents like this, children will suffer in the future.”</p> <p>“When will these people understand that babies have the right to cry and the right to travel, they are part of society, and so are babies!!!!!!!” declared a third.</p> <p><em>Image credits: Weibo</em></p>

Travel Trouble

Talk show legend dies after lengthy health battle

<p>US talk show host Phil Donahue has died aged 88 after a long illness. </p> <p>His family announced his death in a statement to People and <em>NBC News.</em> </p> <p>“Donahue died at his home surrounded by his family, including his wife of 44 years, Marlo Thomas, his sister, his children, grandchildren and his beloved golden retriever, Charlie,” they said.</p> <p>Donahue was dubbed "the king of daytime talk" for being the first to include audiences as part of the talk show, paving the way for other talk show hosts like Oprah Winfrey and Ellen Degeneres. </p> <p>He was the host of <em>The Phil Donahue Show</em> for nearly three decades, from 1967 to 1996.</p> <p>The show tackled controversial issues and topics like equal rights for women in front of a live audience.</p> <p>In May, he and 18 other honourees received the Medal of Freedom from US President Joe Biden, the nation's highest civilian honour. </p> <p>Oprah Winfrey has led tributes to the talk show legend, with a post on social media. </p> <p>"There wouldn't have been an Oprah Show without Phil Donahue being the first to prove that daytime talk and women watching should be taken seriously," she shared, with a photo of a pair embracing during one of their meetings. </p> <p>"He was a pioneer. I'm glad I got to thank him for it. Rest in peace Phil."</p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/C-2tOpNuz1N/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/C-2tOpNuz1N/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Oprah (@oprah)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>Former talk show host Ricki Lake also paid tribute to Donahue on social media, saying: "Raising a glass in honor of the great #phildonohue. Phil was an absolute legend and a pioneer in the talk show space.</p> <p>"So honoured to stand beside him at Oprah's show celebrating talk show icons in 2010. Such a warm, super supportive and brilliant man. Grateful for the path he paved and the legacy he has left behind. May he rest in peace."</p> <p>Montell Williams, fellow TV host also described him as "a true pioneer" saying, "Phil Donahue, the godfather of talk shows, forever changed the landscapes of television. My thoughts and prayers are with Marlo and his family. Rest in peace, Phil"</p> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <p dir="ltr" lang="en">This is a very sad day. I admired Phil Donahue for so many reasons, and he was one of the finest broadcasters in American television. If there wasn't a Phil, there would have never been a Sally. My thoughts & prayers go out to Marlo and their family. <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/RIP?src=hash&ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#RIP</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/Legend?src=hash&ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#Legend</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/talkshows?src=hash&ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#talkshows</a> <a href="https://t.co/knqPeAO6TJ">pic.twitter.com/knqPeAO6TJ</a></p> <p>— Sally Jessy Raphael (@SJRaphael) <a href="https://twitter.com/SJRaphael/status/1825545392953647162?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">August 19, 2024</a></p></blockquote> <p>His wife Marlo Thomas, also paid tribute to her husband, with a throwback photo of the pair on holiday. </p> <p>"I'm sure by now you've heard the very sad news that I lost my sweetheart last night, so I know you understand that I'll be stepping away from this page for a while to take care of myself and the many people who took care of Phil, and held him close to their hearts," she shared.</p> <p>"But I didn't want to disappear without saying thank you for the beautiful messages of love and support that have been coming in all day, and for the wonderful and generous way that you've let Phil and me share our life adventure with you over the years."</p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/C-3PXINo43s/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/C-3PXINo43s/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Marlo Thomas (@marlothomas)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>"As a man who spent his career loving his audiences, Phil got such a kick out of our cozy little community here, and I know he would be very touched by the heartwarming thoughts and memories you've been sharing," she continued. </p> <p>"Until I return, I wish you good health and happy days in the company of family and friends, and I hope that you will continue to hold close those you cherish most, just as I was blessed to do with my beloved Phillip."</p> <p><em>Images: Instagram/ X</em></p> <p> </p>

Caring

“Absolutely livid”: Woman discovers she’s been fired via text on her wedding day

<p dir="ltr">A woman has recalled the moment she discovered she had lost her job after her boss delivered the news via text on the woman’s wedding day.</p> <p dir="ltr">The bride shared that she got the message from her boss just 30 minutes after she walked down the aisle. </p> <p dir="ltr">The woman shared the story with Ben Askins, who regularly shares stories online of toxic employers, as she read out the messages she received on what was supposed to be the happiest day of her life. </p> <p dir="ltr">“On my wedding day, half an hour after the ceremony, I got a text from my boss to let me know I had been fired,” she said. </p> <p dir="ltr">The message from her boss read, “Hey, I hope your wedding went well and that you had a nice time away. I just wanted to let you know that the decision has been made to unfortunately let you go.” </p> <p dir="ltr">“An email has been sent to your personal email address detailing this. I'm really sorry that it didn't work out and wish you all the best moving forward x.”</p> <p dir="ltr">As she was surrounded by loved ones, the bride struggled to contain her emotions as she quickly checked her emails.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I hope your wedding went well and you had a good time. This email is to inform you that your employment will be terminated effective the 20th of May,” the email read.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Your employment has been terminated as we unfortunately feel your performance doesn't meet the expectations that we require for the role.”</p> <p dir="ltr">The woman explained how she felt her manager's email was a “coward's way” of letting her go while she wasn't at work, and was unable to defend herself. </p> <p dir="ltr">“I wasn't going to let it go but what they did... I was really angry at them,” she said. </p> <p dir="ltr">“They had the opportunity to do it in person. Everyone was let go in person except for me.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Askins said the woman’s story was one of the “worst things” he's ever heard a boss do to an employee. </p> <p dir="ltr">“It's meant to be one of the best, most amazing days ever and they've done that to you,” he told the woman. “You have every right to be absolutely livid with them.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Askins' video of the woman’s story has been viewed more than 600,000 times, with many taking particular issue on the bride's boss for being “petty” and “inappropriate”. </p> <p dir="ltr">“This person could have waited a day. It's done on purpose to ruin your special day. Only narcissists would do that,” one said.</p> <p dir="ltr">Another added, “The fact that she texted her to let her know about the email is so petty. She wanted her to know on her wedding day.”</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p>

Legal

New mum admits she hates her baby’s name

<p dir="ltr">A woman has asked for advice after admitting that she hates her new baby’s name and “can’t stand to say it out loud”.</p> <p dir="ltr">The new mum took to Reddit to explain that she had given birth to a baby boy a month ago, and had been discussing potential names for her son with her boyfriend since she fell pregnant. </p> <p dir="ltr">The mother explained that her partner “immediately bombarded” her with names “that he would name” their son, and many of them were family monikers.</p> <p dir="ltr">She said that her boyfriend was keen to name the baby after either his grandfather or great-grandfather, whose names were Oliver and Chad.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I HATE the name Chad,” she said. “We know a couple of Chads and they are not great people. I also don’t love the name Oliver but I’d rather that than Chad.”</p> <p dir="ltr">The woman explained her partner was “very sentimental when it comes to anything in his life that has to do with his family”, while she was “not that sentimental”.</p> <p dir="ltr">“He was adamant on the name Chad because it belonged to his dad’s grandpa, whom his dad never met due to him passing away in the war,” she said.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I asked him to compromise and make Chad the middle name ‘cause I’d rather the name Oliver, his response was ‘maybe’ but in a tone that meant ‘no.’”</p> <p dir="ltr">The woman went on to explain that she and her partner reached a stalemate in the name discussion and it wasn’t brought up again until their son was born. </p> <p dir="ltr">The new mother said the couple planned on “waiting until she was relaxed and situated before they signed the birth certificate”, but when she went to sign it, she saw his name had been written as ‘Chad Beau Smith’ by her boyfriend. </p> <p dir="ltr">“I had had no say in the name whatsoever, my partner had seen me bare-down and drugged up, going through the hardest experience of my life and gave me no say in what we name our son,” she said.</p> <p dir="ltr">The woman was shocked and ended up arguing with her husband for about an hour or so but was so exhausted from the birth, she gave up and said “fine you win”.</p> <p dir="ltr">“My boyfriend then smirked as he handed the birth certificate in. I was too tired to fight anymore. I felt like I just needed to focus on taking care of my new baby,” she said.</p> <p dir="ltr">The mum said she has been avoiding saying his name and also hadn’t posted anything to social media because she “just hates the name”.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I also now feel like I am disconnecting from my relationship with my partner because after all he watched me go through, I feel that I don’t matter,” she said.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Am I overreacting?” she asked on Reddit.</p> <p dir="ltr">The woman’s post quickly went viral on the platform, with people quick to side with the new mum. </p> <p dir="ltr">“Your boyfriend is a bully, and he sucks. Names are a two yes, one no situation. He took advantage of you, and kept calling your little boy by his middle name. I’m enraged for you.” said one.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Why are you with this person?” asked another.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Have his name legally changed. Leave your husband. This is abuse,” said a third.</p> <p dir="ltr">“This guy has no respect for you, you’re not overreacting, you’re under-reacting,” added another.</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p>

Family & Pets

Woman “bullied” on plane over budget seating trick

<p dir="ltr">A young woman has recalled a flight from hell when she was “bullied” by a couple who were trying to utilise a seating hack that went viral on TikTok. </p> <p dir="ltr">The solo traveller took to Reddit to recount the story and ask social media users if she was in the wrong for her action. </p> <p dir="ltr">The woman began by saying she usually pays more to select her plane seat ahead of time, but a medical emergency on another plane had her waiting on standby and left with no option other than to sit in a middle seat.</p> <p dir="ltr">When she was finally able to board, she was greeted by a couple who had purchased both the window and aisle seats in a bid to have more space, utilising a travel “trick” that has been popular on TikTok.</p> <p dir="ltr">The method, which has been dubbed the 'poor man's business class', usually leaves travellers with an empty middle seat and more space, and few travellers opt to pick a middle seat. </p> <p dir="ltr">“When I got to my row the man and woman were chatting and sharing a snack... it was obvious they were together. I mentioned to the man that I'm in the middle, and he got up to let me in,” the unsuspecting traveller wrote on Reddit. </p> <p dir="ltr">“I asked them if they would prefer to sit together, I said I was totally okay with that. The woman reacted rudely to this and said ‘you're not supposed to be sitting here anyway’.”</p> <p dir="ltr">After noticing how the plane was full, she offered to show the pair her new ticket with the correct seat number on it.</p> <p dir="ltr">“She flicked her hand at my ticket and made a disgusted sound. I offered again if they wanted to sit together to which she didn't reply, her partner said it's okay and... made some small talk,” she continued. </p> <p dir="ltr">The man’s girlfriend then interrupted their conversation to ask,”'Did you use one of those third party websites to book your flight? It's so frustrating when people cheap out to inconvenience others.”</p> <p dir="ltr">The American woman explained that she had booked her flight directly and she had been placed on standby like everyone else and didn't choose the middle seat - she was assigned it.</p> <p dir="ltr">She then tried to keep the peace by refusing to engage with the furious woman. </p> <p dir="ltr">“I was so done with her attitude, I put my headphones on and attempted to do my own thing,” she explained.</p> <p dir="ltr">But the “entitled” girlfriend wasn't letting it go, as the woman explained, “This woman kept reaching over me and tapping her partner and trying to talk to him in a way that was super intrusive.”</p> <p dir="ltr">“I could tell even her partner was trying to engage her less so that she would hopefully stop, but she didn't.”</p> <p dir="ltr">“I think they tried to pull that tactic where they don't sit together on purpose...hoping no one will sit between them. But on full flights it doesn't work. And even so - it's not the other person's fault.”</p> <p dir="ltr">The traveller's post was met with hundreds of comments slamming the girlfriend’s behaviour, as one person wrote, “It's like a toddler having a tantrum.”</p> <p dir="ltr">“She was disappointed and a total a**hole. Gross entitled people,” another added. </p> <p dir="ltr">Another person applauded the traveller’s level-headed behaviour, writing, “Wow! You are my hero for keeping it classy - I’m afraid I would not have been as kind as you.”</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p>

Travel Trouble

Why are some people happy when they are dying?

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/mattias-tranberg-941050">Mattias Tranberg</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/lund-university-756"><em>Lund University</em></a></em></p> <p>Simon Boas, who wrote a candid account of living with cancer, passed away on July 15 at the age of 47. In a recent <a href="https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/clmykzrdnljo">BBC interview</a>, the former aid worker told the reporter: “My pain is under control and I’m terribly happy – it sounds weird to say, but I’m as happy as I’ve ever been in my life.”</p> <p>It may seem odd that a person could be happy as the end draws near, but in my experience as a clinical psychologist working with people at the end of their lives, it’s not that uncommon.</p> <p>There is quite a lot of research suggesting that fear of death is at the unconscious centre of being human. William James, an American philosopher, called the knowledge that we must die <a href="https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/170217/the-worm-at-the-core-by-sheldon-solomon-jeff-greenberg-and-tom-pyszczynski/">“the worm at the core”</a> of the human condition.</p> <p>But a <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/44577785">study</a> in Psychological Science shows that people nearing death use more positive language to describe their experience than those who just imagine death. This suggests that the experience of dying is more pleasant – or, at least, less unpleasant – than we might picture it.</p> <p>In the BBC interview, Boas shared some of the insights that helped him come to accept his situation. He mentioned the importance of enjoying life and prioritising meaningful experiences, suggesting that acknowledging death can enhance our appreciation for life.</p> <p>Despite the pain and difficulties, Boas seemed cheerful, hoping his attitude would support his wife and parents during the difficult times ahead.</p> <p>Boas’s words echo the Roman philosopher Seneca who <a href="https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Moral_letters_to_Lucilius/Letter_61">advised that</a>: “To have lived long enough depends neither upon our years nor upon our days, but upon our minds.”</p> <p>A more recent thinker expressing similar sentiments is the psychiatrist <a href="https://www.viktorfrankl.org/">Viktor Frankl</a> who, after surviving Auschwitz, wrote <a href="https://www.penguin.co.uk/books/347571/mans-search-for-meaning-by-viktor-e-frankl/9781846046384">Man’s Search for Meaning</a> (1946) in which he lay the groundwork for a form of existential psychotherapy, with the focus of discovering meaning in any kind of circumstance. Its most recent adaptation is meaning-centred psychotherapy, which offers people with cancer a way to <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4861219/">improve their sense of meaning</a>.</p> <h2>How happiness and meaning relate</h2> <p>In two recent studies, in <a href="https://doi.org/10.1017/S1478951521000262">Palliative and Supportive Care</a> and the <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/1049909120939857">American Journal of Hospice and Palliative Care</a>, people approaching death were asked what constitutes happiness for them. Common themes in both studies were social connections, enjoying simple pleasures such as being in nature, having a positive mindset and a general shift in focus from seeking pleasure to finding meaning and fulfilment as their illness progressed.</p> <p>In my work as a clinical psychologist, I sometimes meet people who have – or eventually arrive at – a similar outlook on life as Boas. One person especially comes to mind – let’s call him Johan.</p> <p>The first time I met Johan, he came to the clinic by himself, with a slight limp. We talked about life, about interests, relationships and meaning. Johan appeared to be lucid, clear and articulate.</p> <p>The second time, he came with crutches. One foot had begun to lag and he couldn’t trust his balance. He said it was frustrating to lose control of his foot, but still hoped to cycle around Mont Blanc.</p> <p>When I asked him what his concerns were, he burst into tears. He said: “That I won’t get to celebrate my birthday next month.” We sat quietly for a while and took in the situation. It wasn’t the moment of death itself that weighed on him the most, it was all the things he wouldn’t be able to do again.</p> <p>Johan arrived at our third meeting supported by a friend, no longer able to grip the crutches. He told me that he had been watching films of him cycling with his friends. He had concluded that he could watch YouTube videos of others cycling around Mont Blanc. He had even ordered a new, expensive mountain bike. “I’ve wanted to buy it for a long time, but was tightfisted,” he said. “I may not be able to ride it, but thought it would be cool to have in the living room.”</p> <p>For the fourth visit, he arrived in a wheelchair. It turned out to be the last time we met. The bike had arrived; he had it next to the couch. There was one more thing he wanted to do.</p> <p>“If by some miracle I were to get out of this alive, I would like to volunteer in domestic care services – one or two shifts a week,” Johan said. “They work hard and it gets crazy sometimes, but they make such an incredible contribution. I wouldn’t have been able to get out of the apartment without them.”</p> <p>My experience of patients with life-threatening disease is that it’s possible to feel happiness alongside sadness, and other seemingly conflicting emotions. Over a day, patients can feel gratitude, remorse, longing, anger, guilt and relief – sometimes all at once. Facing the limits of existence can add perspective and help a person appreciate life more than ever.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/234309/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/mattias-tranberg-941050">Mattias Tranberg</a>, Postdoctoral Research Associate, The Institute of Palliative Care, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/lund-university-756">Lund University</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-are-some-people-happy-when-they-are-dying-234309">original article</a>.</em></p>

Caring

“Insufferable” bride rinsed over her list of “wild demands”

<p dir="ltr">A bride-to-be has been slammed online after her list of “wild demands” was posted by one of her bridesmaids, who were expected to spend thousands of dollars to be part of the “wedding of the century”.</p> <p dir="ltr">The bride wasn’t afraid to set her sights high ahead of her nuptials, and wasn’t shy in asking for a mixture of friends and sponsors to pay for it. </p> <p dir="ltr">One of her bridesmaids shared the exhaustive list of non-negotiable demands to Reddit, in which she asked her bridal party to “step up their game” months before the wedding. </p> <p dir="ltr">“Welcome to the beginning of my wedding journey, I'm thrilled to have you all along for the ride, but let's be clear, this is my day and everything needs to be perfect,” the bride began.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I know what I want and I won't settle for anything less, get ready to follow my lead and make this the most fabulous day ever - this isn't just a wedding, it's basically the met gala.”</p> <p dir="ltr">She first demanded weekly one hour zoom progress meetings, in addition to everyone meeting at a private member's club every Tuesday.</p> <p dir="ltr">Then there was a weekend of luxury dress fittings with “no skips allowed”, followed by demands for everyone to spend approximately $700 on champagne brunches, hotel rooms and travel.</p> <p dir="ltr">The expenses didn’t stop there, with bridesmaids expected to shell out $1,200 for beauty treatments, and $500 accommodation for her 'safari barbie' themed engagement party.</p> <p dir="ltr">The packed and pricey itinerary continued with the girls then jetting off to Ibiza for “bachelorette party number one”.</p> <p dir="ltr">“Mother in law is leading the charge and will send Venmo requests soon so you guys can budget,” the bride said. </p> <p dir="ltr">The bridesmaids were also expected to buy the bride a gift, which she felt she deserved for all her hard planning, and expected her bridal party to throw her the “perfect” bridal shower.</p> <p dir="ltr">“It needs to be elegant, chic and totally Instagrammable; think designer decorations and gourmet catering, make sure it's perfect, this is your responsibility to handle and make amazing,'” she said.</p> <p dir="ltr">There was one last trip for final dress fittings and then a reminder to set aside another $1,000 for the wedding weekend itself, which promised to be amazing. </p> <p dir="ltr">The post was quickly met with a wave of backlash with many commenting on the bride’s “entitled and narcissistic” behaviour, with one saying the list should be titled “how to lose friends in one page”.</p> <p dir="ltr">Some people said the hefty cost was one thing, but that it was “horrible” how much time the bridesmaids were expected to give up for planning every week, for months leading up to the big day. </p> <p dir="ltr">“The minute I read ‘weekly one hour check in meeting’ I would have been out. I don't do that s*** for my actual job, let alone this bankruptcy in the making,” one woman said.</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p>

Relationships

Cancer diagnosis can be devastating, but for some it gives permission to live more radically

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/kevin-dew-577291">Kevin Dew</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/te-herenga-waka-victoria-university-of-wellington-1200">Te Herenga Waka — Victoria University of Wellington</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/alex-broom-121063">Alex Broom</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/chris-cunningham-1534054">Chris Cunningham</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/te-kunenga-ki-purehuroa-massey-university-806">Te Kunenga ki Pūrehuroa – Massey University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/elizabeth-dennett-1532423">Elizabeth Dennett</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-otago-1304">University of Otago</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/kerry-chamberlain-103714">Kerry Chamberlain</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/te-kunenga-ki-purehuroa-massey-university-806">Te Kunenga ki Pūrehuroa – Massey University</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/richard-egan-400188">Richard Egan</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-otago-1304">University of Otago</a></em></p> <p>A diagnosis of life-limiting cancer can be overwhelming and cause feelings of panic and anxiety. But for some people, it provides a license to live life differently, including quitting toxic jobs and becoming more adventurous.</p> <p>In our <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/1467-9566.13797">recently published research</a>, we sought to understand the impact of a cancer diagnosis and subsequent experiences for cancer survivors.</p> <p>We talked with 81 New Zealanders (23 Māori and 58 non-Māori) who had lived longer than expected with a life-limiting or terminal diagnosis of cancer (four to 32 years since first diagnosis), and 25 people who were identified as their supporters.</p> <p>We found there are vastly different ways in which people experience and respond to a cancer diagnosis, but for some it’s a prompt to make significant changes. Of the 81 participants, 26 expressed the view, unsolicited, that cancer had some positive impact on their lives – without downplaying the negative impacts it could have as well.</p> <h2>A licence to change</h2> <p>Being told you only have limited time left to live can undoubtedly be a shock. But it can lead to profound change.</p> <p>It’s not uncommon for people who receive a serious diagnosis to draw up a “<a href="https://theconversation.com/paris-in-spring-bali-in-winter-how-bucket-lists-help-cancer-patients-handle-life-and-death-225682">bucket list</a>”. Some people in our study took the opportunity to travel or move to a new home.</p> <p>For others, the diagnosis provided a chance to rethink their lives and make more significant changes to the way they lived. They decided to be culturally more adventurous and to take up new skills.</p> <p>Many of these people quit their jobs or changed to jobs that suited them better. Many changed their relationships with the people around them. One talked about showing more affection for his children, another was kinder and stopped fretting over small things.</p> <p>Some decided to be more selective and no longer be around people who were negative. Others took up new hobbies or crafts which they felt were healing. For one person, the cancer diagnosis provided the impetus to look at things and people differently, which they thought would not have happened otherwise.</p> <p>Individuals could also undergo a transformation to become what they felt they were meant to be in life. One person, given two months to live, embraced rongoā (Māori traditional healing), including its spiritual side. They now love their “journey” and feel this was what they were “supposed to do”.</p> <p>For many, a diagnosis of cancer gave them license to be different people and to resist conforming to social norms, including having a job, being thrifty or not taking risks.</p> <h2>Disrupting diagnoses</h2> <p>One person, given only months to live, moved out of her flat, gave away her possessions, quit her job that she described was toxic, and returned home to say goodbye to her family.</p> <p>Most importantly for her, she worked on experiencing “joy” – after receiving the diagnosis, she realised she had lost it. But she continues to live many years later. After a while, she had to find a new flat, get a new job and the recovery of her joy was challenged:</p> <blockquote> <p>I had to start working again. And, of course, with working again, joy goes down, time goes down, rest goes down, spirituality goes down.</p> </blockquote> <p>But not everyone has the opportunity to change. Some peoples’ lives were limited because of the physical effects of the cancer, its treatment, or because of their personal, social or financial resources.</p> <p>Some go to great lengths to ensure their lives change as little as possible after diagnosis to maintain a sense of normality.</p> <h2>Why we need to know</h2> <p>Given the fear a cancer diagnosis can elicit, it is important to see there are different ways of responding.</p> <p>It is also worth knowing there are people who live longer than expected. Many people in our study were given just months to live, but one woman was still alive 12 years after being told she had a year left.</p> <p>Beyond that, this research documents how the disruption produced by a cancer diagnosis can prompt people to breach social norms. Where people have the capacity and resources to change, those around them and their health professionals can support them in taking opportunities to live life differently.</p> <p>We heard people say they think of their cancer as a friend or an amazing opportunity. Some even felt thankful.</p> <p>The possibility of cancer providing opportunities for some in no way diminishes the grief or a sense of loss, fear and anxiety that can accompany such diagnoses.</p> <p>Our research supports a reframing of cancer narratives, to consider ways of tempering the negative impacts of a diagnosis – while remaining cognisant of the struggle that can follow such news, and the variability in people’s capacity to engage with that struggle.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/233782/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/kevin-dew-577291">Kevin Dew</a>, Professor of Sociology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/te-herenga-waka-victoria-university-of-wellington-1200">Te Herenga Waka — Victoria University of Wellington</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/alex-broom-121063">Alex Broom</a>, Professor of Sociology & Director, Sydney Centre for Healthy Societies, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/chris-cunningham-1534054">Chris Cunningham</a>, Professor of Maori & Public Health, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/te-kunenga-ki-purehuroa-massey-university-806">Te Kunenga ki Pūrehuroa – Massey University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/elizabeth-dennett-1532423">Elizabeth Dennett</a>, Associate Professor in Surgery, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-otago-1304">University of Otago</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/kerry-chamberlain-103714">Kerry Chamberlain</a>, Professor of Social and Health Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/te-kunenga-ki-purehuroa-massey-university-806">Te Kunenga ki Pūrehuroa – Massey University</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/richard-egan-400188">Richard Egan</a>, Associate Professor in Health Promotion, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-otago-1304">University of Otago</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/cancer-diagnosis-can-be-devastating-but-for-some-it-gives-permission-to-live-more-radically-233782">original article</a>.</em></p>

Body

Gold medallist breaks down in tears over her late father's note

<p>An Olympic gold medallist has broken down in tears as she recalled an emotional and poignant exchange she had with her father before he died of cancer. </p> <p>Lola Anderson claimed the gold medal for Team Great Britain in rowing, beating The Netherlands by just 0.15 seconds in the women’s quadruple sculls. </p> <p>In her victory interview with the <em><a href="https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cnd06pg0k0wo" target="_blank" rel="noopener">BBC</a></em>, Lola recalled a note her father Don had given her months before his death in 2019.</p> <p>Before his death, Lola's father asked her to retrieve a safety deposit box that contained an old diary entry that Lola wrote when she was just 14 years old. </p> <p>In it, she wrote about becoming an Olympic rowing champion after seeing Helen Glover win gold at London 2012.</p> <p>The note read: “My name is Lola Anderson and I think it would be my biggest dream in life to go to the Olympics and represent Team GB in rowing and, if possible, win a gold medal.”</p> <p>Lola soon threw the note in the bin as she started to doubt her dream, but unbeknownst to her, her father fished it out of the garbage and kept it, giving it back to her before he died. </p> <p>When asked about the note after the win, she told the <em>BBC</em>, “I’d forgotten about it obviously. A couple years ago my dad reminded me."</p> <p>“I know he’d be so, so proud. I’m just thinking a lot about him right now, it’s really lovely.”</p> <p>Speaking about the note to the <em><a href="https://www.theguardian.com/sport/article/2024/jul/26/he-chose-to-believe-meet-lola-anderson-gb-rower-living-her-late-fathers-olympic-dream" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Guardian</a></em> before the Olympics, Anderson said her father, who introduced her to the sport, believed in her when she didn’t.</p> <p>“I kinda thought that was a really cocky, arrogant thing to have written. Back then, on a good day I wasn’t capsizing. I ripped the page out and threw it in the bin,” she said. </p> <p>“It reflects to me how much he cared, invested and believed in me and my siblings, even when we couldn’t see it. There was nothing to show I had any talent when I first started rowing but he kept the note and chose to believe.”</p> <p><em>Image credits: BBC </em></p>

Family & Pets

"We should give back": Bill Gates' ex-wife on giving away her $16bn fortune

<p>Melinda French Gates has opened up on her decision to give away her fortune after leaving the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation in June. </p> <p>Melinda, who is reportedly worth $16.8 billion, said that she will stick with her decision to give away her fortune on <em>The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, </em> as it's "the right thing to do for society". </p> <p>"If we grew up in the United States, anybody who has grown up in this country has been really lucky and I don't care who you are," she explained.</p> <p>"To be able to go to a decent school, grow up and pursue your career, and if so you are a billionaire, my gosh, you have benefited from this country, right?</p> <p>"So we should give back."</p> <p>She also feels there is "a responsibility and to do it in a way that's incredibly thoughtful".</p> <p>Melinda, who divorced the Microsoft founder Bill Gates back in 2021, has announced her plans to focus on her organisation Pivotal Ventures, which she founded in 2015.</p> <p>The organisation's aim is to "advance social progress by removing barriers that hold people back."</p> <p>She said that she is determined to ensure that "women's rights are not only on the agenda, but that women are setting the agenda" – especially after watching women's rights be rolled back internationally over the last few years."</p> <p>"What I saw, part of why our women's rights got rolled back in the United States is that those organisations were starved for funding, and they were playing defense," she explained. </p> <p>Melinda has pledged to donate $1 billion to this end over the next two years. </p> <p><em>Image: Julien De Rosa/EPA/ Shutterstock Editorial</em></p>

Money & Banking

Clint Eastwood's partner's cause of death revealed

<p>The cause of death of Clint Eastwood's partner has been revealed, just days after the actor addressed her tragic passing. </p> <p>Christina Sandera, Eastwood's partner of 10 years, died suddenly on July 18th at just 61 years of age. </p> <p>Now, a representative from the Monterey County Health Department confirmed to <em><a href="https://nypost.com/2024/07/23/entertainment/clint-eastwoods-partner-christina-sanderas-cause-of-death-revealed/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The New York Post</a></em> that Sandera died of a heart attack. </p> <p>The death certificate listed her immediate cause as cardiac arrhythmia, which is an abnormality in the timing or pattern of the heartbeat.</p> <p>Atherosclerotic coronary artery disease was also outlined as an additional condition that led to Sandera’s death.</p> <p>Eastwood addressed the passing of his partner after the <em>Hollywood Reporter</em> confirmed her death, with the actor writing, “Christina was a lovely, caring woman, and I will miss her very much.”</p> <p>The pair met when Sandera worked as a hostess at a hotel and restaurant owned by the actor in California, before they started dating in 2014. </p> <p>The couple largely kept their romance out of the public eye with Sandera only attended a handful of events with the Hollywood icon during their 10-year relationship.</p> <p>The couple, who never married, walked their last red carpet together in November 2019 at AFI Fest in Hollywood. </p> <p>One of Eastwood's children from a previous marriage Morgan, 27, paid tribute to her father’s longtime love on Sunday by sharing a photo of herself, her father and Eastwood and her wedding, writing, “A devastating loss for our whole family. Thank you Christina for being a good partner to my Dad ❤️ you will be greatly missed.”</p> <p><em>Image credits: John McCoy/UPI/Shutterstock Editorial </em></p>

Caring

Poor sleep is really bad for your health. But we found exercise can offset some of these harms

<div class="theconversation-article-body"><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/bo-huei-huang-1243280">Bo-Huei Huang</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/emmanuel-stamatakis-161783">Emmanuel Stamatakis</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a></em></p> <p>Despite the well-known links between poor sleep and poorer health, getting enough good quality sleep has become a luxury in modern society.</p> <p>Many of us struggle to improve our sleep, while amid the COVID pandemic and recurring lock-downs, <a href="https://theconversation.com/were-sleeping-more-in-lockdown-but-the-quality-is-worse-155797">our sleep has deteriorated</a>.</p> <p>But <a href="https://doi.org/10.1136/bjsports-2021-104046">our new study</a>, published today in the British Journal of Sports Medicine, bears some encouraging news.</p> <p>We found doing enough physical activity (including exercise such as running or going to the gym) may counter some of the adverse health effects of unhealthy sleep patterns.</p> <p>Let us explain.</p> <h2>Does poor sleep really harm our health?</h2> <p>Unhealthy sleep patterns include:</p> <ul> <li> <p>not sleeping for long enough (less than seven hours per night for adults)</p> </li> <li> <p>sleeping for too long (more than nine hours per night for adults)</p> </li> <li> <p>snoring</p> </li> <li> <p>insomnia</p> </li> <li> <p>being a night owl, also known as “late chronotype”. This is people who naturally feel most awake and motivated in the evening, and are sluggish in the morning.</p> </li> </ul> <p>They are <a href="https://doi.org/10/ggjqrt">all associated</a> with poorer health.</p> <p>Recent research shows poor sleep may:</p> <ul> <li> <p>cause <a href="https://doi.org/10.1038/s41577-019-0190-z">inflammation</a></p> </li> <li> <p>impair the metabolism of glucose (also known as blood sugar) and reduce the number of calories burned, thereby increasing the risk of <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-sleep-is-so-important-for-losing-weight-145058">obesity</a></p> </li> <li> <p>increase the risk of <a href="https://doi.org/10/gg6x87">heart disease</a> and <a href="https://doi.org/10/ggnw5h">premature death</a>.</p> </li> </ul> <p>However, very few studies have examined how sleep and physical activity interact and impact our health.</p> <p>We set out to answer the question: if I have poor sleep but I do quite a lot of physical activity, can that offset some of the harms of my poor sleep in the long-term? Or would this not make any difference?</p> <h2>What did we do?</h2> <p>We analysed the information provided by 380,055 middle-aged adults in the UK Biobank study, recruited between 2006 and 2010. Participants reported their level of physical activity and five aspects of their sleep.</p> <p>We grouped people based on their sleep behaviour into healthy, intermediate or poor.</p> <p>We categorised people’s level of physical activity based on <a href="https://bjsm.bmj.com/content/54/24/1451">the World Health Organization (WHO) guidelines</a>. People who met the upper bounds of the guidelines did 300 minutes of moderate intensity physical activity a week, or 150 minutes of vigorous exercise, or a combination of both. Those who met the lower bound did 150 minutes of moderate intensity exercise a week, or 75 minutes of vigorous exercise, or a combination.</p> <p>Moderate intensity physical activity usually makes you slightly out of breath if sustained for a few minutes and includes brisk walking or cycling at a leisurely pace.</p> <p>Vigorous exercise usually makes you breath hard and can include running, swimming, and playing sports like tennis, netball, soccer or footy.</p> <figure class="align-center "><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/408096/original/file-20210624-15-1qfe1ay.png?ixlib=rb-4.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/408096/original/file-20210624-15-1qfe1ay.png?ixlib=rb-4.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=409&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/408096/original/file-20210624-15-1qfe1ay.png?ixlib=rb-4.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=409&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/408096/original/file-20210624-15-1qfe1ay.png?ixlib=rb-4.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=409&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/408096/original/file-20210624-15-1qfe1ay.png?ixlib=rb-4.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=515&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/408096/original/file-20210624-15-1qfe1ay.png?ixlib=rb-4.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=515&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/408096/original/file-20210624-15-1qfe1ay.png?ixlib=rb-4.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=515&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" alt="" /><figcaption><span class="caption">Doing at least 150 minutes of moderate intensity physical activity a week, or 75 minutes of vigorous exercise, can offset some of the health harms of poor sleep.</span> <span class="attribution"><a class="source" href="https://apps.who.int/iris/bitstream/handle/10665/336656/9789240015128-eng.pdf?sequence=1&isAllowed=y">World Health Organization, CC BY-NC-SA 3.0 IGO</a></span></figcaption></figure> <h2>What did we find?</h2> <p>We followed up with the participants after 11 years. By May 2020, 15,503 participants had died, of which 4,095 died from heart disease and 9,064 died from cancer.</p> <p><a href="https://doi.org/10.1136/bjsports-2021-104046">We found</a> that, compared to healthy sleepers, people with poor sleep had a 23% higher risk of premature death, a 39% higher risk of dying from heart disease, and a 13% higher risk of dying from cancer.</p> <p>We then compared the data of people who slept well with those who slept poorly, and how much they exercised. We found people who had the highest risk of dying from heart disease and cancer were those who had poor sleep and didn’t meet the WHO physical activity guidelines. On the other hand, those who had poor sleep but did enough physical activity to meet the WHO guidelines didn’t have as high a risk of dying from heart disease or cancer, compared to those who slept poorly and didn’t meet the physical activity guidelines.</p> <p>For example, let’s look at the risk of dying from cancer. Those who had poor sleep and did no physical activity had a 45% higher risk of dying from cancer compared to those who had healthy sleep and exercised a lot. But among those who met the physical activity guidelines, despite poor sleep, they didn’t really have a higher risk of dying from cancer any more.</p> <p>We found physical activity levels which met at least the bottom threshold of the WHO guidelines could reduce or eliminate some of the health harms of poor sleep. So people who did at least 150 minutes of moderate intensity or 75 minutes of vigorous intensity exercise per week were to some extent protected against the detrimental health effects of poor sleep.</p> <p>Those who had both poor sleep and did no moderate-to-vigorous intensity physical activity had the highest risks of premature death.</p> <p>Our study wasn’t designed to find out how and why physical activity may counteract some of the bad physiological impacts of poor sleep. But other research provides theories. For example, adequate physical activity may <a href="https://doi.org/10.1249/MSS.0000000000001179">reduce inflammation, help maintain a healthy glucose metabolism</a>, and <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.pcad.2018.07.014">increase the number of calories burned</a>.</p> <p>It’s important to note our study was what’s called an “observational study”. It shows an association between adequate physical activity and reduced harms from poor sleep, but we must be careful in interpreting causation. It can’t conclusively say adequate physical activity <em>causes</em> the reduction of harms from poor sleep, though there’s strong evidence for an association in the right direction.</p> <p>Our study offers a hopeful message, that even if you haven’t been able to improve your sleep, you can still offset some of the health harms by doing enough exercise. <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S009174352030339X">Our previous research</a> has also shown physical activity may help improve poor sleep patterns, which are a serious health problem across the world.</p> <p>In addition to combating some of the negative outcomes of poor sleep, physical activity can also provide many other health benefits and extend our lives. For example, a 2019 study found people who met WHO’s physical activity target above <a href="https://doi.org/10.1186/s12916-019-1339-0">lived three years longer on average</a> than those who didn’t.</p> <p>During lockdowns, access to parks, gyms, and swimming pools might be limited in many places. But there are still many ways to <a href="https://www.euro.who.int/en/health-topics/health-emergencies/coronavirus-covid-19/publications-and-technical-guidance/noncommunicable-diseases/stay-physically-active-during-self-quarantine">to stay fit and active at home during the coronavirus</a>.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/163270/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/bo-huei-huang-1243280">Bo-Huei Huang</a>, PhD candidate, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/emmanuel-stamatakis-161783">Emmanuel Stamatakis</a>, Professor of Physical Activity, Lifestyle, and Population Health, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sydney-841">University of Sydney</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/poor-sleep-is-really-bad-for-your-health-but-we-found-exercise-can-offset-some-of-these-harms-163270">original article</a>.</em></p> </div>

Body

Wild reason why woman divorced her husband

<p>A woman has asked for advice online after she explained the wild reason why she is divorcing her husband. </p> <p>Taking to Reddit's popular "Am I The A**hole?" thread, the mother explained that after her husband sat in the car for too long, she decided to end her two-year marriage. </p> <p>As she began to recall the situation, she prefaced the story by saying that for many years, her partner always liked to stay in the car five to 10 minutes after he got home.</p> <div> <div id="sda-INARTICLE"></div> </div> <p>“I don’t know why he does it, but he talked about a past traumatic experience he had when he came home and caught his ex cheating on him,” the Redditor wrote. “Because of that he’d just spend few minutes in his car before he enters his home as response to his trauma.”</p> <p>While the woman is understanding of her husband's unusual car quirk, she said he does not take into account how it negatively impacts her and their family. </p> <p>According to the Reddit writer, his prolonged period in the car makes her “uneasy” and has caused several arguments, especially when he’s sat in the driveway when guests are inside, or "when dinner is waiting on him and he’d take 10 minutes silently sitting in the car.”</p> <p>She went on to share that her biggest concern was finding her husband sitting in the car during a crisis, which was realised when a family emergency unfolded at home. </p> <p>The woman explained that her eight-year-old son fell and tripped when walking down the stairs, breaking his ankle as a result and needed to be taken to hospital.</p> <p> She then called her husband and asked if he could leave work to take him to the emergency room, saying, “Then I called and called and then I was stunned when I looked out the window and I saw him sitting outside the house in his car. I was both shocked and angry.”</p> <p>According to her husband, he had been sitting in the car for eight minutes and said that he wouldn’t come inside to help until his 10 minutes lapsed because he didn’t feel “comfortable.”</p> <p>The original poster noted, “He told me to get my son ready to take him to the hospital, but I started screaming at him nonstop telling him this was a family emergency and that he was out of his mind to behave like that.”</p> <p>The mother took her son to the hospital with the help of a neighbour and refused to answer her husband's calls when he finally emerged from the car. </p> <p>Later, she decided his response was so uncalled for that she took herself and her son to her mother's place and said she wanted a divorce from her husband of two years. </p> <p>“He tried to rationalize and justify what he’s done saying he could not help it and that he was nervous and wanted to help my son but felt stuck,” the Redditor said.</p> <p>She continued, “I refused to reply to his messages and days later his family literally harassed me saying I was making my husband’s trauma more severe and that I disrespected his boundaries.”</p> <p>After time had passed from the situation, the woman wondered if she had been too rash in her decision, and asked those online for their advice. </p> <p>Her post was met with hundreds of comments, with many saying they believe her husband is suffering from obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). </p> <p>“It sounds like some form of OCD to me,” one person commented, while another agreed: “It sounds like he is stuck in a compulsive behavior.”</p> <p>The original writer confessed she had asked him to seek professional help for his behaviours, but he wasn’t up for it, saying, "He had refused professional help and his family sided with him.”</p> <p>To this, one reader added, “The fact that he has refused to seek help for it. Peak selfishness. Leaving is warranted. Best luck to you and your boy.”</p> <p>“If he refused professional help then you have your answer. You need to be able to rely on your husband in case of an emergency and he proved to you that you can’t. You’re definitely NTA (not the a**hole,” another argued.</p> <p><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p>

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Woman divides the internet over not wanting to share Lotto winnings

<p dir="ltr">A young mother has divided the internet after sharing that she didn’t want to split her Lotto winnings with her boyfriend. </p> <p dir="ltr">The woman took to Facebook to share that she bought the ticket on a whim and won half her annual salary as a result.</p> <p dir="ltr">Taking to social media, she explained how the awkward conversation with her partner unfolded. </p> <p dir="ltr">“I started to tell my boyfriend I was gonna put it towards my kids' college and do some upgrades to my house. He said, ‘what about my half?’,” she wrote.</p> <p dir="ltr">She went on to explain how the couple have the same yearly salary and how her partner said he could really use the financial help, but she doesn't want to share. </p> <p dir="ltr">“If I had won $6million I'd have no problem giving him half because it would be very easy to live off $3million. But 1/4 of one year's salary won't help me much,” she added.</p> <p dir="ltr">She also revealed that the couple would sometimes “daydream" about winning a lottery jackpot and would split a ticket every now and then, promising to go halves in the winnings.</p> <p dir="ltr">However, the mum said this time was different because it was a spur-of-the-moment ticket purchase and he wasn't part of it.</p> <p dir="ltr">The woman’s post welcomed a range of differing comments, with some people not appearing sympathetic to the young mum. </p> <p dir="ltr">“Is half the pot worth more than your relationship? If it is, you shouldn't be in the relationship anyway, so call it off,” one person said.</p> <p dir="ltr">Another person added, “Can you for two seconds not see how this is very petty? He didn't contribute 'this time'. I'm sure when he buys a ticket he's not thinking 'oh this one is for just me and if we win on these ones then we will share’.”</p> <p dir="ltr">However, some people were quick to stand up for her and tell her she doesn’t owe her partner half her winnings. </p> <p dir="ltr">“She isn't selfish for keeping the money, they didn't have an agreement this time, and why should he be entitled to it. She is better off spending it on her home and her children's future,” one woman said.</p> <p dir="ltr">Another added, “If he won $20 would he give you $10? If he won $1,000 would he give you $500? If the answer is yes, then throw the guy a bone, but if you don't live together, there's no ring on your finger, and the answer is no? Keep it.”</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p>

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Wild reason why woman divorced her husband

Woman divides the internet over not wanting to share Lotto winnings