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Nicole Kidman reveals her past struggles with bullying

<p>Nicole Kidman has revealed how before she was a household name and an award-winning performer, she was bullied and teased relentlessly through her childhood.</p> <p>The Aussie actress opened up about her struggles in the new documentary series, <span id="U8417448510243ZD"><em>In Vogue: The 90s</em> on Disney+, </span>which gives viewers an inside look at the fashion world during the decade of supermodels.</p> <p>The 57-year-old admitted that it wasn’t until the fashion world invited her into its inner-circle that she felt comfortable in her own skin due to being bullied throughout her childhood.</p> <p>“I mean, I was a red-headed, fair-skinned girl who was almost 5’11 at the age of 14,” she said.</p> <p>“I would get teased, and it wasn’t kind. So every time I was given access to that whole world, you feel like a little girl who’s been given the chance to step into this sort of fantasy world.”</p> <p>As Kidman rose to fame in the 90s, she was approached by legendary designer John Galliano, who wanted to dress her for the 1997 Oscars.</p> <p>Revealing what was going through her mind when the iconic designer reached out, Kidman delved into some of her struggles from her youth regarding her body image and what it meant to her to have a dress designed specifically for her.</p> <p>“Can you believe it?” Kidman rhetorically asked. “My whole life, I wanted to be 5’2” and curvaceous and suddenly, being 5’11 and completely sort of skinny and flat chested was like, ‘Great, we can dress you.’ ”</p> <p>“I grew up watching Audrey Hepburn and Katharine Hepburn and Grace Kelly — all these women whose style was created with the designers that they’re affiliated with,” Kidman continued, speaking of ushering in a new era in red carpet fashion.</p> <p>“They just loved fashion. So I remember thinking, but of course, this should be brought into Hollywood now, and we should be wearing the things that are made in these gorgeous little salons in Paris. Because that’s what they used to do, so why aren’t we still doing it?”</p> <p><em>Image credits: Instagram</em></p>

Family & Pets

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Meghan Markle opens up about past trauma

<p>Meghan Markle has opened up about her mental health struggle in a new interview. </p> <p>In a joined interview with <span style="font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, 'Segoe UI', Roboto, Oxygen, Ubuntu, Cantarell, 'Open Sans', 'Helvetica Neue', sans-serif;">her husband Prince Harry for <em>CBS Sunday Morning</em>, </span>the Duchess of Sussex admitted that she hasn't "really scraped the surface" on her struggle, as the couple launched their new project <a href="https://archewell.org/theparentsnetwork/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Parents' Network</a>. </p> <p>The Parents’ Network aims to support parents who lost or almost lost their child to cyberbullying and other traumas related to social media use. </p> <p>While speaking about online bullying and its effects on young children, <span style="font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, 'Segoe UI', Roboto, Oxygen, Ubuntu, Cantarell, 'Open Sans', 'Helvetica Neue', sans-serif;">the Duchess of Sussex spoke about her own experience and connection to the families, as she also had suicidal thoughts in 2021. </span></p> <p>“When you’ve been through any level of pain or trauma, I believe part of our healing journey — certainly part of mine — is being able to be really open about it,” she told Jane Pauley. </p> <p>"And you know, I haven't really scraped the surface on my experience. But I do think that I would never want someone else to feel that way," she continued.</p> <p>"And I would never want someone else to be making those sort of plans. And I would never want someone else to not be believed."</p> <p>"So, if me voicing what I have overcome will save someone, or encourage someone in their life to really genuinely check in on them and not assume that the appearance is good, so everything's OK, then that's worth it.</p> <p>"I'll take a hit for that."</p> <p>In a 2021 interview with Oprah Winfrey, Meghan revealed that she had suicidal ideation while pregnant with son Archie due to the pressure of life as a royal and the way the British media treated her. </p> <p>“I just didn’t want to be alive anymore,” she said at the time.</p> <p>She also recalled reaching out to palace officials and said that she did not receive any mental health help. </p> <p>The initiative, launched with the couple’s Archewell Foundation, aims to make sure that no other families go through what they did. </p> <p>“Our kids are young; they’re 3 and 5. They’re amazing,” she told Pauley. </p> <p>“But all you want to do as parents is protect them. And so, as we can see what’s happening in the online space, we know that there’s a lot of work to be done there, and we’re just happy to be able to be a part of change for good.”</p> <p><em>Images: CBS Sunday Morning</em></p>

Caring

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Our obsession with taking photos is changing how we remember the past

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/giuliana-mazzoni-175429">Giuliana Mazzoni</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-hull-1191">University of Hull</a></em></p> <p>I recently visited the <a href="http://hermitage--www.hermitagemuseum.org/wps/portal/hermitage/?lng=sv">Hermitage</a> in St Petersburg, Russia – one of the best art museums in the world. I was expecting to serenely experience its masterpieces, but my view was blocked by a wall of smart phones taking pictures of the paintings. And where I could find a bit of empty space, there were people taking selfies to create lasting memories of their visit.</p> <p>For many people, taking hundreds, if not thousands, of pictures is now a crucial part of going on holiday – documenting every last detail and posting it on social media. But how does that affect our actual memories of the past – and how we view ourselves? As an expert on memory, I was curious.</p> <p>Unfortunately, psychological research on the topic is so far scant. But we do know a few things. We use smart phones and new technologies <a href="http://studie-life.de/en/life-reports/smart-payments;%20https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Tim_Fawns/publication/275331048_Blended_Memory_the_Changing_Balance_of_Technologically-mediated_Semantic_and_Episodic_Memory/links/56962c6d08ae820ff07594ee.pdf">as memory repositories</a>. This is nothing new – humans have always used external devices as an aid when acquiring knowledge and remembering.</p> <p>Writing certainly serves this function. Historical records are collective external memories. Testimonies of migrations, settlement or battles help entire nations trace a lineage, a past and an identity. In the life of an individual, written diaries serve a similar function.</p> <h2>Memory effects</h2> <p>Nowadays we tend to commit very little to memory – we entrust a huge amount to the cloud. Not only is it almost unheard of to recite poems, even the most personal events are generally recorded on our cellphones. Rather than remembering what we ate at someone’s wedding, we scroll back to look at all the images we took of the food.</p> <p>This has serious consequences. Taking photos of an event rather than being immersed in it has been shown to lead to <a href="https://theconversation.com/memory-loss-isnt-just-an-old-persons-problem-heres-how-young-people-can-stay-mentally-fit-102352">poorer recall of the actual event</a> – we get distracted in the process.</p> <p>Relying on photos to remember has a similar effect. Memory needs to be exercised on a regular basis in order to function well. There are many studies documenting the importance of memory retrieval practice – <a href="http://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/viewdoc/download?doi=10.1.1.738.2035&amp;rep=rep1&amp;type=pdf">for example in university students</a>. Memory is and will remain essential for learning. There is indeed some evidence showing that committing almost all knowledge and memories to the cloud <a href="https://www.journals.uchicago.edu/doi/10.1086/691462">might hinder the ability to remember</a>.</p> <p>However, there is a silver lining. Even if some studies claim that all this makes us more stupid, what happens is actually shifting skills from purely being able to remember to being able to manage the way we remember more efficiently. This is called metacognition, and it is an overarching skill that is also essential for students – for example when planning what and how to study. There is also substantial and reliable evidence that external memories, selfies included, <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/23957379">can help</a> individuals with memory impairments.</p> <p>But while photos can in some instances help people to remember, the quality of the memories may be limited. We may remember what something looked like more clearly, but this could be at the expense of other types of information. One study showed that while photos could help people remember what they saw during some event, they <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0956797617694868">reduced their memory of what was said</a>.</p> <h2>Identity distortions?</h2> <p>There are some rather profound risks when it comes to personal memory. Our identity is a product of our life experiences, which can be easily accessed through our memories of the past. So, does constant photographic documentation of life experiences alter how we see ourselves? There is no substantial empirical evidence on this yet, but I would speculate that it does.</p> <p>Too many images are likely to make us remember the past in a fixed way – blocking other memories. While it is <a href="https://theconversation.com/what-is-your-first-memory-and-did-it-ever-really-happen-95953">not uncommon for early childhood memories</a> to be based on photos rather than the actual events, these are not always true memories.</p> <p>Another issue is the fact that research has uncovered <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0747563216302503;%20http://www.vulture.com/2014/01/history-of-the-selfie.html">a lack of spontaneity in selfies</a> and many other photos. They are planned, the poses are not natural and at times the image of the person is distorted. They also reflect a narcissistic tendency which shapes the face in unnatural mimics – artificial big smiles, sensual pouts, funny faces or offensive gestures.</p> <p>Importantly, selfies and many other photos are also <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5318447/">public displays</a> of specific attitudes, intentions and stances. In other words, they do not really reflect who we are, they reflect what we want to show to others about ourselves at the moment. If we rely heavily on photos when remembering our past, we may create a distorted self identity based on the image we wanted to promote to others.</p> <p>That said, our natural memory isn’t actually perfectly accurate. Research shows that we often <a href="https://theconversation.com/the-real-you-is-a-myth-we-constantly-create-false-memories-to-achieve-the-identity-we-want-103253">create false memories about the past</a>. We do this in order to maintain the identity that we want to have over time – and avoid conflicting narratives about who we are. So if you have always been rather soft and kind – but through some significant life experience decide you are tough – you may dig up memories of being aggressive in the past or even completely make them up.</p> <p>Having multiple daily memory reports on the phone of how we were in the past might therefore render our memory less malleable and less adaptable to the changes brought about by life – making our identity more stable and fixed.</p> <p>But this can create problems if our present identity becomes different from our fixed, past one. That is an uncomfortable experience and exactly what the “normal” functioning of memory is aimed to avoid – it is malleable so that we can have a non-contradictory narrative about ourselves. We want to think of ourselves as having a certain unchanging “core”. If we feel unable to change how we see ourselves over time, this could seriously affect our sense of agency and mental health.</p> <p>So our obsession with taking photos may be causing both memory loss and uncomfortable identity discrepancies.</p> <p>It is interesting to think about how technology changes the way we behave and function. As long as we are aware of the risks, we can probably mitigate harmful effects. The possibility that actually sends shivers to my spine is that we lose all those precious pictures because of some widespread malfunctioning of our smart phones.</p> <p>So the next time you’re at a museum, do take a moment to look up and experience it all. Just in case those photos go missing.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/109285/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/giuliana-mazzoni-175429">Giuliana Mazzoni</a>, Professor of Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-hull-1191">University of Hull</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/our-obsession-with-taking-photos-is-changing-how-we-remember-the-past-109285">original article</a>.</em></p>

Mind

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Tastes from our past can spark memories, trigger pain or boost wellbeing. Here’s how to embrace food nostalgia

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/megan-lee-490875">Megan Lee</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/bond-university-863">Bond University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/doug-angus-1542552">Doug Angus</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/bond-university-863">Bond University</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/kate-simpson-1542551">Kate Simpson</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/bond-university-863">Bond University</a></em></p> <p>Have you ever tried to bring back fond memories by eating or drinking something unique to that time and place?</p> <p>It could be a Pina Colada that recalls an island holiday? Or a steaming bowl of pho just like the one you had in Vietnam? Perhaps eating a favourite dish reminds you of a lost loved one – like the sticky date pudding Nanna used to make?</p> <p>If you have, you have tapped into <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/02699931.2022.2142525">food-evoked nostalgia</a>.</p> <p>As researchers, we are exploring how eating and drinking certain things from your past may be important for your mood and mental health.</p> <h2>Bittersweet longing</h2> <p>First named in 1688 by Swiss medical student, <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/44437799">Johannes Hoffer</a>, <a href="https://compass.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/spc3.12070">nostalgia</a> is that bittersweet, sentimental longing for the past. It is experienced <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1111/j.1467-8721.2008.00595.x">universally</a> across different cultures and lifespans from childhood into older age.</p> <p>But nostalgia does not just involve positive or happy memories – we can also experience nostalgia for <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2F0022-3514.91.5.975">sad and unhappy moments</a> in our lives.</p> <p>In the <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Femo0000817">short and long term</a>, nostalgia can positively impact our health by improving <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Fa0025167">mood</a> and <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Femo0000817">wellbeing</a>, fostering <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Fa0017597">social connection</a> and increasing quality of life. It can also trigger feelings of <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Femo0000817">loneliness or meaninglessness</a>.</p> <p>We can use nostalgia to <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Fa0025167">turn around a negative mood</a> or enhance our sense of <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Femo0000817">self, meaning and positivity</a>.</p> <p>Research suggests nostalgia alters activity in the <a href="https://academic.oup.com/scan/article/17/12/1131/6585517">brain regions associated with reward processing</a> – the same areas involved when we seek and receive things we like. This could explain the <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S2352250X22002445?via%3Dihub">positive feelings</a> it can bring.</p> <p>Nostalgia can also increase feelings of loneliness and sadness, particularly if the memories highlight dissatisfaction, grieving, loss, or wistful feelings for the past. This is likely due to activation of <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2352250X22002445?casa_token=V31ORDWcsx4AAAAA:Vef9hiwUz9506f5PYGsXH-JxCcnsptQnVPNaAGares2xTU5JbKSHakwGpLxSRO2dNckrdFGubA">brain areas</a> such as the amygdala, responsible for processing emotions and the prefrontal cortex that helps us integrate feelings and memories and regulate emotion.</p> <h2>How to get back there</h2> <p>There are several ways we can <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/fulltext/2006-20034-013.html">trigger</a> or tap into nostalgia.</p> <p>Conversations with family and friends who have shared experiences, unique objects like photos, and smells can <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S2352250X23000076">transport us back</a> to old times or places. So can a favourite song or old TV show, reunions with former classmates, even social media <a href="https://www.theverge.com/2015/3/24/8284703/facebook-on-this-day-nostalgia-recap">posts and anniversaries</a>.</p> <p>What we eat and drink can trigger <a href="https://www.emerald.com/insight/content/doi/10.1108/QMR-06-2012-0027/full/html">food-evoked nostalgia</a>. For instance, when we think of something as “<a href="https://theconversation.com/health-check-why-do-we-crave-comfort-food-in-winter-118776">comfort food</a>”, there are likely elements of nostalgia at play.</p> <p>Foods you found comforting as a child can evoke memories of being cared for and nurtured by loved ones. The form of these foods and the stories we tell about them may have been handed down through generations.</p> <p>Food-evoked nostalgia can be very powerful because it engages multiple senses: taste, smell, texture, sight and sound. The sense of <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/09658211.2013.876048?casa_token=wqShWbRXJaYAAAAA%3AqJabgHtEbPtEQp7qHnl7wOb527bpGxzIJ_JwQX8eAyq1IrM_HQFIng8ELAMyuoFoeZyiX1zeJTPf">smell</a> is closely linked to the limbic system in the brain responsible for emotion and memory making food-related memories particularly vivid and emotionally charged.</p> <p>But, food-evoked nostalgia can also give rise to <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1002/hpja.873">negative memories</a>, such as of being forced to eat a certain vegetable you disliked as a child, or a food eaten during a sad moment like a loved ones funeral. Understanding why these foods <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/02699931.2022.2142525?casa_token=16kAPHUQTukAAAAA%3A9IDvre8yUT8UsuiR_ltsG-3qgE2sdkIFgcrdH3T5EYbVEP9JZwPcsbmsPLT6Kch5EFFs9RPsMTNn">evoke negative memories</a> could help us process and overcome some of our adult food aversions. Encountering these foods in a positive light may help us reframe the memory associated with them.</p> <h2>What people told us about food and nostalgia</h2> <p>Recently <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1002/hpja.873">we interviewed eight Australians</a> and asked them about their experiences with food-evoked nostalgia and the influence on their mood. We wanted to find out whether they experienced food-evoked nostalgia and if so, what foods triggered pleasant and unpleasant memories and feelings for them.</p> <p>They reported they could use foods that were linked to times in their past to manipulate and influence their mood. Common foods they described as particularly nostalgia triggering were homemade meals, foods from school camp, cultural and ethnic foods, childhood favourites, comfort foods, special treats and snacks they were allowed as children, and holiday or celebration foods. One participant commented:</p> <blockquote> <p>I guess part of this nostalgia is maybe […] The healing qualities that food has in mental wellbeing. I think food heals for us.</p> </blockquote> <p>Another explained</p> <blockquote> <p>I feel really happy, and I guess fortunate to have these kinds of foods that I can turn to, and they have these memories, and I love the feeling of nostalgia and reminiscing and things that remind me of good times.</p> </blockquote> <p>Understanding food-evoked nostalgia is valuable because it provides us with an insight into how our sensory experiences and emotions intertwine with our memories and identity. While we know a lot about how food triggers nostalgic memories, there is still much to learn about the specific brain areas involved and the differences in food-evoked nostalgia in different cultures.</p> <p>In the future we may be able to use the science behind food-evoked nostalgia to help people experiencing dementia to tap into lost memories or in psychological therapy to help people reframe negative experiences.</p> <p>So, if you are ever feeling a little down and want to improve your mood, consider turning to one of your favourite comfort foods that remind you of home, your loved ones or a holiday long ago. Transporting yourself back to those times could help turn things around.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/232826/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/megan-lee-490875">Megan Lee</a>, Senior Teaching Fellow, Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/bond-university-863">Bond University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/doug-angus-1542552">Doug Angus</a>, Assistant Professor of Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/bond-university-863">Bond University</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/kate-simpson-1542551">Kate Simpson</a>, Sessional academic, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/bond-university-863">Bond University</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Shutterstock </em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/tastes-from-our-past-can-spark-memories-trigger-pain-or-boost-wellbeing-heres-how-to-embrace-food-nostalgia-232826">original article</a>.</em></p>

Mind

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Why it’s still a scientific mystery how some can live past 100 – and how to crack it

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/richard-faragher-224976">Richard Faragher</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-brighton-942">University of Brighton</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/nir-barzilai-1293752">Nir Barzilai</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/albert-einstein-college-of-medicine-3638">Albert Einstein College of Medicine</a></em></p> <p>A 35-year-old man <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/18544745/">only has a 1.5% chance of dying in the next ten years</a>. But the same man at 75 has a 45% chance of dying before he reaches 85. Clearly, ageing is bad for our health. On the bright side, we have made unprecedented progress in understanding the fundamental mechanisms that control ageing and late-life disease.</p> <p>A few tightly linked biological processes, sometimes called the <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/23746838/">“hallmarks of ageing”</a>, including our supply of stem cells and communication between cells, act to keep us healthy in the early part of our lives – with <a href="https://theconversation.com/the-secret-to-staying-young-scientists-boost-lifespan-of-mice-by-deleting-defective-cells-54068">problems arising as these start to fail</a>. <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/34699859/">Clinical trials are ongoing</a> to see if targeting some of these hallmarks can improve <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/31542391/">diabetic kidney disease</a>, <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29997249/">aspects of</a> <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/33977284/">immune function</a> and age-related <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30616998/">scarring of the lungs</a> among others. So far, so good.</p> <p>Unfortunately, big, unanswered questions remain in the biology of ageing. To evaluate what these are and how to address them, the <a href="https://www.afar.org/">American Federation For Aging Research</a>, a charity, recently convened a series of <a href="https://www.afar.org/imported/AFAR_GeroFuturesThinkTankReport_November2021.pdf">meetings for leading scientists and doctors</a>. The experts agreed that understanding what is special about the biology of humans who survive more than a century is now a key challenge.</p> <p>These centenarians <a href="https://www.statista.com/chart/18826/number-of-hundred-year-olds-centenarians-worldwide/">comprise less than 0.02% of the UK population</a> but have exceeded the life expectancy of their peers by almost 50 years (babies born in the 1920s typically had a life expectancy of less than 55). How are they doing it?</p> <p>We know that centenarians live so long because they are unusually healthy. They remain in good health for about 30 years longer than most normal people and when they finally fall ill, they are only sick for a very short time. This <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/27377170/">“compression of morbidity”</a> is clearly good for them, but also benefits society as a whole. In the US, the medical care costs for a centenarian in their last two years of life <a href="https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/series/sr_10/sr10_198.pdf">are about a third of those of someone who dies in their seventies</a> (a time when most centenarians don’t even need to see a doctor).</p> <p>The children of centenarians are also much healthier than average, indicating they are inheriting something beneficial from their parents. But is this genetic or environmental?</p> <h2>Centenarians aren’t always health conscious</h2> <p>Are centenarians the poster children for a healthy lifestyle? For the general population, watching your weight, not smoking, drinking moderately and eating at least five servings of fruit and vegetables a day can <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/27296932/">increase life expectancy by up to 14 years</a> compared with someone who does none of these things. This difference <a href="https://publications.parliament.uk/pa/ld5801/ldselect/ldsctech/183/18305.htm#_idTextAnchor012">exceeds that seen</a> between the least and most deprived areas in the UK, so intuitively it would be expected to play a role in surviving for a century.</p> <p>But astonishingly, this needn’t be the case. <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21812767/">One study</a> found that up to 60% of Ashkenazi Jewish centenarians have smoked heavily most of their lives, half have been obese for the same period of time, less than half do even moderate exercise and under 3% are vegetarians. The children of centenarians appear no more health conscious than the general population either.</p> <p>Compared to peers with the same food consumption, wealth and body weight, however, <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29050682/">they have half the prevalence of cardiovascular disease</a>. There is something innately exceptional about these people.</p> <h2>The big secret</h2> <p>Could it be down to rare genetics? If so, then there are two ways in which this could work. Centenarians might carry unusual genetic variants that extend lifespan, or instead they might lack common ones that cause late-life disease and impairment. Several studies, including our own work, <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32860726/">have shown</a> that centenarians have just as many bad genetic variants as the general population.</p> <p>Some even carry two copies of the largest known common risk gene for Alzheimer’s disease (APOE4), but still don’t get the illness. So a plausible working hypothesis is that centenarians carry rare, beneficial genetic variations rather than a lack of disadvantageous ones. And the best available data is consistent with this.</p> <p>Over 60% of centenarians have genetic changes that alter the genes which regulate growth in early life. This implies that these remarkable people are human examples of a type of lifespan extension observed in other species. Most people know that <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28803893/">small dogs tend to live longer than big ones</a> but fewer are aware that this is a general phenomenon across the animal kingdom. <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26857482/">Ponies can live longer than horses</a> and many strains of laboratory mice with dwarfing mutations <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29653683/">live longer than their full-sized counterparts</a>. One potential cause of this is reduced levels of a growth hormone called IGF-1 – although human centenarians <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28630896/">are not necessarily shorter than the rest of us</a>.</p> <p>Obviously, growth hormone is necessary early on in life, but there is increasing evidence that high levels of IGF-1 in mid to late life <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/18316725/">are associated with increased late-life illness</a>. The detailed mechanisms underlying this remain an open question, but even among centenarians, women with the lowest levels of growth hormone <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/24618355/">live longer than those with the highest</a>. They also have better cognitive and muscle function.</p> <p>That doesn’t solve the problem, though. Centenarians are also different from the rest of us in other ways. For example, they tend to have good cholesterol levels – hinting there may several reasons for their longevity.</p> <p>Ultimately, centenarians are “natural experiments” who show us that it is possible to live in excellent health even if you have been dealt a risky genetic hand and chose to pay no attention to health messages – but only if you carry rare, poorly understood mutations.</p> <p>Understanding exactly how these work should allow scientists to develop new drugs or other interventions that target biological processes in the right tissues at the right time. If these become a reality perhaps more of us than we think will see the next century in. But, until then, don’t take healthy lifestyle tips from centenarians.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/172020/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/richard-faragher-224976">Richard Faragher</a>, Professor of Biogerontology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-brighton-942">University of Brighton</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/nir-barzilai-1293752">Nir Barzilai</a>, Professor of Medicine and Genetics, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/albert-einstein-college-of-medicine-3638">Albert Einstein College of Medicine</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Shutterstock</em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-its-still-a-scientific-mystery-how-some-can-live-past-100-and-how-to-crack-it-172020">original article</a>.</em></p>

Retirement Life

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"I was terrified": Law & Order star reveals traumatic past

<p><em>Warning: This story contains graphic content.</em></p> <p>Mariska Hargitay, who plays Olivia Benson, a character that investigate rapists on <em>Law &amp; Order: Special Victims Unit, </em>has revealed that she too is a victim of sexual assault. </p> <p>The actress opened up about her traumatic past in a powerful essay written for <a href="https://people.com/mariska-hargitay-experience-rape-renewal-reckoning-8424247" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><em>People Magazine</em></a>, where she revealed that she was raped by “a friend" when she was in her thirties. </p> <p>"A man raped me in my thirties," she bravely revealed in the essay. </p> <p>"It wasn’t sexual at all. It was dominance and control. Overpowering control."</p> <p>The actress revealed that he was a friend who "made a unilateral decision" and recalled the fear she felt when the incident occurred. </p> <p>"He grabbed me by the arms and held me down. I was terrified," she said. </p> <p>"I didn’t want it to escalate to violence. I now know it was already sexual violence, but I was afraid he would become physically violent.</p> <p>"I went into freeze mode, a common trauma response when there is no option to escape. I checked out of my body," she recalled. </p> <p>Hargitay, who is the daughter of the late actress Jane Mansfield, said that she never thought of herself as a "survivor", and often "minimised" what happened to her when she talked about it with others. </p> <p>"My husband Peter remembers me saying, “I mean, it wasn’t rape," she wrote. </p> <p>"Then things started shifting in me, and I began talking about it more in earnest with those closest to me. They were the first ones to call it what it was."</p> <p>The actress said that she wants other survivors to feel "no shame" about sexual assault and wants "this violence to end." </p> <p>She added that justice "may look different for each survivor," but for her she wants "an acknowledgment and an apology" after what happened. </p> <p>"This is a painful part of my story. The experience was horrible. But it doesn’t come close to defining me, in the same way that no other single part of my story defines me," she concluded, adding that she feels for all sexual violence survivors. </p> <p>"I’m turning 60, and I’m so deeply grateful for where I am. I’m renewed and I’m flooded with compassion for all of us who have suffered. And I’m still proudly in process."</p> <p>Hargitay started her own foundation, the Joyful Heart Foundation, in 2004 to help survivors of sexual assault. </p> <p><em>Image: Getty</em></p>

Caring

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Is the Barbie movie a bold step to reinvent and fix past wrongs or a clever ploy to tap a new market?

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lauren-gurrieri-5402">Lauren Gurrieri</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/rmit-university-1063">RMIT University</a></em></p> <p>After a months-long marketing blitz, the much-hyped Barbie movie is released this week.</p> <p>From a <a href="https://news.airbnb.com/barbies-malibu-dreamhouse-is-back-on-airbnb-but-this-time-kens-hosting/">Malibu Barbie dreamhouse</a> listed on AirBnB, an AI tool that <a href="https://www.barbieselfie.ai/au/">transforms selfies into Barbie movie posters</a> and multiple Barbie-themed brand collaborations ranging from nail polish to roller skates, Barbie is everywhere.</p> <p>She has even gone viral as a fashion trend known as <a href="https://www.elle.com.au/fashion/barbiecore-27286">Barbiecore</a>, exploding across social media with people embracing vibrant pink hues and hyper feminine aesthetics. A Barbie world is upon us.</p> <p>Although some have criticised this <a href="https://twitter.com/MosheIsaacian/status/1673415496929267712">saturation</a> strategy, it is a very deliberate marketing ploy to revitalise and redefine a brand with a contested position and history.</p> <p>As well as attracting adults who grew up with Barbie and are curious to see what’s changed, the reinvention is drawing in those younger fans swept up by the tsunami of marketing and merchandise.</p> <p>Despite being one of the <a href="https://www.newsweek.com/brandspark-most-trusted-brands-america-2022">most trusted brands</a> with a value of approximately <a href="https://www.statista.com/statistics/1009126/barbie-brand-value-worldwide/">$US700 million</a>, Barbie has long attracted feminist criticism for fuelling outdated and problematic “plastic fantastic” sexist stereotypes and expectations.</p> <h2>The Barbie backlash</h2> <p>Only a few years back, Barbie was a brand in crisis. <a href="https://time.com/3667580/mattel-barbie-earnings-plus-size-body-image/">Sales plummeted</a> across 2011 to 2015 against the cultural backdrop of a rise in body positivity and backlash against a doll that represented narrow ideals and an impossible beauty standard.</p> <p>After all, at life-size Barbie represents a body shape held by <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/BF01544300#page-1">less than 1 in 100,000</a> real people. In fact, she is so <a href="https://rehabs.com/explore/dying-to-be-barbie/#.UWs-5aKyB8F">anatomically impossible</a> that, if she were real, she would be unable to lift her head, store a full liver or intestines, or <a href="https://www.bmj.com/content/305/6868/1575">menstruate</a>.</p> <p>The backlash has also been in response to growing concerns about how she influences child development, particularly how and what children learn about gender. Barbie has been identified as a <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1740144521000243#!">risk factor</a> for thin-ideal internalisation and body dissatisfaction for young girls, encouraging <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S174014451630208X">motivation for a thinner shape</a> that damages body image and self esteem.</p> <p>And despite the multiple careers Barbie has held over the decades, research highlights that girls who play with Barbie believe they have <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s11199-014-0347-y">fewer career options than boys</a>. This speaks to the power of toys to reinforce gender stereotypes, roles and expectations, and how Barbie has imported narrow ideals of femininity, girlhood and womanhood into young girls’ lives.</p> <h2>Reinventing a long-established icon</h2> <p>In response to this backlash, Mattel launched a new range of Barbies in 2016 that were promoted as <a href="https://shop.mattel.com/collections/fashion-dolls#filter.ss_filter_tags_subtype=Fashionistas">diverse</a>, representing different body shapes, sizes, hair types and skin tones. This was not without criticism, with “curvy” Barbie still considered thin and dolls named in ways that drew attention foremost to their bodies.</p> <p>From a white, well-dressed, middle-class, girl-next-door with friends of a similar ilk, Barbie has since been marketed as a symbol of diversity and inclusion. To signify the extent of the transformation, Mattel’s executives gave this project the code name “Project Dawn”.</p> <p>Mattel - like many other brands joining the <a href="https://theconversation.com/victorias-secret-joins-the-inclusive-revolution-finally-realizing-diversity-sells-163955">“inclusivity revolution”</a> - knew that diversity sells, and they needed to make their brand relevant for contemporary consumers.</p> <p>Diversity initiatives included a line of <a href="https://shop.mattel.com/pages/barbie-role-models">female role model dolls</a>, promoted as “introducing girls to remarkable women’s stories to show them you can be anything”.</p> <p>Barbie was also given a voice in the form of <a href="https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL5BsRl9zFaeSKIL4XD-pdGHGbJRvkfe8S">Barbie Vlogs</a>, where she expressed her views on issues including depression and the <a href="https://www.bustle.com/p/barbies-vlog-about-the-sorry-reflex-is-the-feminist-pep-talk-all-90s-babies-need-to-hear-9852366">sorry reflex</a>. A gender neutral collection called “creatable world” was added in 2019 to open up gender expression possibilities when playing with Barbies.</p> <p>Such efforts were crucial to undoing missteps of the past, such as a “Teen Talk Barbie” that was programmed to say “<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jSL2-rbE9AM">Math class is tough!</a>”, or the compulsory heterosexuality that Barbie has long advanced.</p> <h2>The latest step in Barbie’s transformation</h2> <p>Barbie the film is simply the next step in an evolution to make brand Barbie inclusive. And with a rumoured film budget of $100 million, the supporting marketing machine provides a critical opportunity to reset the Barbie narrative.</p> <p>With Greta Gerwig, acclaimed director of female-led stories such as Little Women and Lady Bird at the helm, and a diverse cast of Barbies of different races, body types, gender identities and sexual preferences, the film and its creators have sought to assure audiences of the film’s feminist leanings.</p> <p>Addressing the complicated history of Barbie is crucial for audiences who grew up and played with the doll and are grappling with introducing her to the next generation of doll consumers.</p> <p>Yet, Robbie Brenner, executive producer of Mattel Films, has explicitly stated that Gerwig’s Barbie is “not a feminist movie”. Indeed, the main character still represents a narrow beauty standard - tall, thin, blonde, white - with diverse characters in place to support her narrative.</p> <p>Which begs the question: are these inclusion initiatives simply emblematic of diversity washing, where the language and symbolism of social justice are hijacked for corporate profit? Or do they represent a genuine effort to redress the chequered history of a brand that promotes poor body image, unrealistic ideals and rampant materialism?</p> <p>What is clear is that in today’s climate where brands are increasingly rewarded for taking a stand on sociopolitical issues, brand Barbie’s attempts to reposition as inclusive have paid off: sales are now booming.</p> <p>Seemingly, Barbie’s famous tagline that “anything is possible” has shown itself to be true.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/209394/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lauren-gurrieri-5402">Lauren Gurrieri</a>, Associate Professor in Marketing, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/rmit-university-1063">RMIT University</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images</em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/is-the-barbie-movie-a-bold-step-to-reinvent-and-fix-past-wrongs-or-a-clever-ploy-to-tap-a-new-market-209394">original article</a>.</em></p>

Movies

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When your house has a (disturbing) history, what should buyers be told about its ‘past’?

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/eileen-webb-95332">Eileen Webb</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-south-australia-1180">University of South Australia</a></em></p> <p>Imagine you have just bought a home. You have moved in and, during a friendly chat with the neighbours, you find out the property had been the <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2018-07-07/what-is-stigmatised-property-and-what-are-your-rights/9911608">scene of a serious crime</a> or <a href="https://www.aicnsw.com.au/our-dream-house-was-a-meth-lab/">used to manufacture</a> methamphetamine.</p> <p>How would you react? Is this something you would want to have known prior to the sale? If you had known, would this have affected you decision to buy the property? And was the real estate agent or vendor <a href="https://www.domain.com.au/news/what-do-agents-have-to-reveal-about-a-home8217s-history-20170810-gxcm5k/">under any obligation</a> to let you know?</p> <p>In most cases, the answer is (somewhat surprisingly to buyers) “no”. However, amendments to Victoria’s Sale of Land Act 1962 <a href="https://www.consumer.vic.gov.au/latest-news/sale-of-land-changes-in-effect-legislation-update">have now broadened the matters</a> that must be disclosed to buyers prior to a sale, including where a serious crime has occurred. Renters who find they have entered into a stigmatised property must resort to the consumer protection laws discussed below.</p> <h2>Why were the laws required?</h2> <p>The ancient doctrine of <em>caveat emptor</em> (let the buyer beware) still impacts on real estate transactions. It means the buyer bears the responsibility of making their own enquiries about the property.</p> <p>Property inspections are usually confined to the physical condition of the property. While it would be possible, at least theoretically, to arrange for a person to investigate its “background”, this can be a difficult process, especially if such information is concealed or hard to come by.</p> <p>As a result, each state and territory has introduced laws that provide for some level of disclosure to the buyer during the conveyancing process. The extent of disclosure required and the nature of matters that must be disclosed varies from jurisdiction to jurisdiction.</p> <p>Furthermore, section 18 of the Australian Consumer Law <a href="http://classic.austlii.edu.au/au/legis/cth/consol_act/caca2010265/sch2.html#_Toc32223214">considers conduct</a> as misleading or deceptive where a matter is not disclosed but, in the circumstances, there is a reasonable expectation it would be.</p> <p>The problem is that while disclosure may be required in matters involving, for example, a structural fault or a road-widening proposal, such information is confined to physical issues affecting the property.</p> <p>However, what happens when the matter involves not a physical defect but a psychological or stigmatising one, such as a murder, for example? Such information may be of considerable importance to potential buyers who, for personal or religious reasons, would find living in a property where such an event occurred intolerable. On a more mercenary note, the impact on resale value of the property <a href="http://journalarticle.ukm.my/7237/1/115-293-1-PB.pdf">could be significant</a>.</p> <h2>The nature of ‘stigmatised’ property</h2> <p>Concern about the effect of stigma on property is not a recent phenomenon. Courts in several jurisdictions, including Australia, <a href="https://api.research-repository.uwa.edu.au/portalfiles/portal/1218611/3632_3632.pdf">have had to grapple</a> with buyers who had discovered, after purchase, that the property had been the scene of a serious crime or criminal activity, a suicide had occurred, persons had been suffering from certain illnesses, or a sex offender lived nearby.</p> <p>In one case a young man had murdered his parents and sister in their Sydney home. The property was later sold to a young couple. After discovering the tragic events that had occurred in the home, they sought to withdraw from the sale on religious grounds.</p> <p>There was a <a href="https://www.theage.com.au/national/estate-agents-fined-over-triple-murder-house-20041220-gdz86g.html">significant amount of criticism</a> of the real estate agent for not informing the buyers about what had occurred there. After considerable public pressure and an investigation by the NSW Office of Fair Trading, the contract was set aside.</p> <p>On a more ethereal note, there have been a series of cases in the United States where buyers have sought, in some cases successfully, to have a sale rescinded <a href="http://zillow.mediaroom.com/2019-10-29-Selling-a-Haunted-House-Heres-What-You-Need-to-Know">because the house</a> was (allegedly) haunted or the subject of <a href="https://casetext.com/case/stambovsky-v-ackley">paranormal activity</a>.</p> <h2>Disclosure laws regarding stigma</h2> <p>The Victorian legislation clarifies obligations for estate agents and vendors regarding <a href="https://www.consumer.vic.gov.au/latest-news/sale-of-land-changes-in-effect-legislation-update">the disclosure of “material facts”</a>.</p> <p>In summary, an estate agent or vendor cannot knowingly conceal any material facts about a property when selling land. The legislation is supported by guidelines that clarify the nature of a material fact. This includes circumstances where, during the current or previous occupation, the property was the scene of a serious crime or an event that may create long-term potential risks to the health and safety of occupiers of the land.</p> <p>Specific examples include extreme violence such as a homicide, the use of the property for the manufacture of substances such as methylamphetamine, or a defence or fire brigade training site involving the use of hazardous materials. Relevant factors can include the reaction of other potential buyers to the fact, including their willingness to buy in light of the revelation.</p> <p>Significant penalties and even imprisonment await vendors and real estate agents who do not comply.</p> <h2>Will the laws work?</h2> <p>As with any new legislation, we will have to wait and see how this plays out. However, some preliminary comments can be made.</p> <p>First, it will be interesting to see how the term “knowingly” is interpreted. Could an agent or vendor avoid the provisions if they merely suspect an issue but do not look further into it? The term “wilful blindness” comes to mind.</p> <p>Second, a fact can be material in either a general or a specific sense. The general sense seems straightforward, as it refers to information most people would consider when deciding whether to buy a property.</p> <p>However, how serious must a crime be to be material? What if the situation involves cultivation of marijuana rather than a more egregious substance?</p> <p>More complex is where a material fact may be of importance to a specific buyer but not buyers generally. For example, in the case discussed above, the buyers’ religion made it impossible for them to live in a home where a violent murder had occurred. In this case, the onus seems to be on the prospective buyer to ask questions about matters of concern to them.</p> <h2>What now?</h2> <p>Although one suspects that buyers of an allegedly haunted house might not succeed under this legislation, the laws address a significant gap regarding disclosure of psychological considerations in the purchase of a property rather than the traditional physical ones.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/132766/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/eileen-webb-95332">Eileen Webb</a>, Professor of Law and Ageing, School of Law, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-south-australia-1180">University of South Australia</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images </em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/when-your-house-has-a-disturbing-history-what-should-buyers-be-told-about-its-past-132766">original article</a>.</em></p>

Real Estate

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Why does music bring back memories? What the science says

<p>You’re walking down a busy street on your way to work. You pass a busker playing a song you haven’t heard in years. Now suddenly, instead of noticing all the goings on in the city around you, you’re mentally reliving the first time you heard the song. Hearing that piece of music takes you right back to where you were, who you were with and the feelings associated with that memory.</p> <p>This experience – when music brings back memories of events, people and places from our past – is known as a <a href="https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0251692">music-evoked autobiographical memory</a>. And it’s a <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0305735619888803">common experience</a>. </p> <p>It often occurs as an <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0963721410370301">involuntary memory</a>. That is, we make no effort to try to recall such memories, they just come to mind spontaneously. </p> <p>Research has recently begun to uncover why music appears to be such a good cue for invoking memories. First, music tends to accompany many distinctive life events, such as proms, graduations, weddings and funerals, so it can play an important role in reconnecting us with these <a href="https://doi.org/10.1017/S1041610215000812">self-defining moments</a>.</p> <p>Music also often captures our attention, due to the way it affects our <a href="https://theconversation.com/the-power-of-our-song-the-musical-glue-that-binds-friends-and-lovers-across-the-ages-73593">minds</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/rhythm-on-the-brain-and-why-we-cant-stop-dancing-56354">bodies</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-sad-songs-say-so-much-to-some-people-but-not-others-65365">emotions</a>. </p> <p>When music draws our attention, this increases the likelihood that it will be encoded in memory together with details of a life event. And this then means it is able to serve as an effective cue for remembering this event years later.</p> <h2>Positive memories</h2> <p>In <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jarmac.2021.09.002">recent research</a> my colleague and I found that the emotional nature of a piece of music is an important factor in how it serves as a memory cue. </p> <p>We compared music with other emotional memory cues that had been rated by a large group of participants as conveying the same emotional expression as the music excerpts we used. This included comparing music with “emotional sounds”, such as nature and factory noises and “emotional words”, such as “money” and “tornado”.</p> <p>When compared with these emotionally matched cues, the music didn’t elicit any more memories than the words. But what we did find was that music evoked more consistently positive memories than other emotional sounds and words. This was especially the case for negative emotional stimuli. Specifically, sad and angry music evoked more positive memories than sad and angry sounds or words. </p> <p>It seems then that music appears to have the ability to reconnect us with emotionally positive moments from our pasts. This suggests that using <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-researchers-are-turning-to-music-as-a-possible-treatment-for-stroke-brain-injuries-and-even-parkinsons-171701">music therapeutically</a> may be particularly fruitful. </p> <h2>How and when</h2> <p>The familiarity of a piece of music also, perhaps unsurprisingly, plays a role. In <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/17470218221129793">another recent study</a>, we found that more familiar music evokes more memories and brings memories to mind more spontaneously. </p> <p>So part of the reason music may be a more effective cue for memories than, for instance, our favourite film or favourite book, is that we typically reengage with songs more often over our lifetimes compared to films, books or TV shows.</p> <p>The situations when we listen to music may also play a role. <a href="https://doi.org/10.1017/CBO9780511575921">Previous research</a> shows that involuntary memories are more likely to come back during activities where our mind is free to wander to thoughts about our past. These activities tend to be non-demanding in terms of our attention and include things like commuting, travelling, housework and relaxing. </p> <p>These types of activities align almost perfectly with those recorded in another study where we asked participants to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/0305735619888803">keep a diary</a> and note when music evoked a memory, along with what they were doing at the time it happened. We found that daily activities that often go hand in hand with listening to music – such as travelling, doing chores or going for a run – tend to lead to more involuntary memories in the first place.</p> <p>This contrasts with other hobbies, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1525/mp.2021.38.5.435">such as watching TV</a>, which can require our mind to be more focused on the activity at hand and so less likely to wander to scenarios from our past. </p> <p>It seems then that music is not only good at evoking memories but also the times when we are more likely to listen to music are the times when our minds may <a href="https://theconversation.com/how-your-brain-decides-what-to-think-198109">naturally be more likely to wander</a> anyway.</p> <p>Music is also present during many life events that are distinctive, emotional or self-defining – and <a href="https://theconversation.com/how-your-brain-decides-what-to-think-198109">these types of memories</a> tend to be more easily recalled. </p> <p>Indeed, the power of music to connect us with our past shows how music, memories and emotions are all linked – and it seems certain songs can act as a direct line to our younger selves.</p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images</em></p> <p><em>This article originally appeared on <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-does-music-bring-back-memories-what-the-science-says-197301" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Conversation</a>. </em></p>

Music

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Why do I remember embarrassing things I’ve said or done in the past and feel ashamed all over again?

<p>We’ve all done it – you’re walking around going about your business and suddenly you’re thinking about that time in high school you said something really stupid you would never say now.</p> <p>Or that time a few years ago when you made a social gaffe.</p> <p>You cringe and just want to die of shame.</p> <p>Why do these negative memories seem to just pop into our heads? And why do we feel so embarrassed still, when the occasion is long past?</p> <p><strong>How do memories come into our awareness?</strong></p> <p>The current thinking is there are two ways in which we recall experiences from our past. One way is purposeful and voluntary. For example, if you try to remember what you did at work yesterday, or what you had for lunch last Saturday. This involves a deliberate and effortful process during which we search for the memory in our minds.</p> <p>The second way is <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0963721410370301" target="_blank" rel="noopener">unintended and spontaneous</a>. These are memories that just seem to “pop” into our minds and can even be unwanted or intrusive. So, where does this second type of memory come from?</p> <p>Part of the answer lays in how memories are connected to each other. The current understanding is our past experiences are represented in <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1364661318300652?casa_token=SSFCzEsOjMkAAAAA:dYMJ2aVZpSCs9JCD9-iXsTMMnkyqnNtlcOoxA3lLzs8sNRrA8SXqb5LYamz25ZcMrsYxLoftp3A" target="_blank" rel="noopener">connected networks of cells</a> that reside in our brain, called neurons.</p> <p>These neurons grow physical connections with each other through the overlapping information in these representations. For example, memories might share a type of context (different beaches you’ve been to, restaurants you’ve eaten at), occur at similar periods of life (childhood, high school years), or have emotional and thematic overlap (times we have loved or argued with others).</p> <figure class="align-center zoomable"><a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/493440/original/file-20221104-13-ha3lz8.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=45&amp;auto=format&amp;w=1000&amp;fit=clip"><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/493440/original/file-20221104-13-ha3lz8.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=45&amp;auto=format&amp;w=754&amp;fit=clip" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/493440/original/file-20221104-13-ha3lz8.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=45&amp;auto=format&amp;w=600&amp;h=401&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/493440/original/file-20221104-13-ha3lz8.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=30&amp;auto=format&amp;w=600&amp;h=401&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/493440/original/file-20221104-13-ha3lz8.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=15&amp;auto=format&amp;w=600&amp;h=401&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/493440/original/file-20221104-13-ha3lz8.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=45&amp;auto=format&amp;w=754&amp;h=503&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/493440/original/file-20221104-13-ha3lz8.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=30&amp;auto=format&amp;w=754&amp;h=503&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/493440/original/file-20221104-13-ha3lz8.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=15&amp;auto=format&amp;w=754&amp;h=503&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=3 2262w" alt="A bakery window" /></a><figcaption><em><span class="caption">Memories can be triggered by internal stimuli (thoughts, feelings) or external stimuli (something we see, hear, smell).</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">Yeh Xintong/Unsplash</span>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">CC BY</a></span></em></figcaption></figure> <p>An initial activation of a memory could be triggered by an external stimuli from the environment (sights, sounds, tastes, smells) or internal stimuli (thoughts, feelings, physical sensations). Once neurons containing these memories are activated, associated memories are then <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.3758/s13423-020-01792-x" target="_blank" rel="noopener">more likely to be recalled into conscious awareness</a>.</p> <p>An example might be walking past a bakery, smelling fresh bread, and having a spontaneous thought of last weekend when you cooked a meal for a friend. This might then lead to a memory of when toast was burned and there was smoke in the house. Not all activation will lead to a conscious memory, and at times the associations between memories might not be entirely clear to us.</p> <p><strong>Why do memories make us feel?</strong></p> <p>When memories come to mind, we often experience <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1002/(SICI)1099-0720(199610)10:5%3C435::AID-ACP408%3E3.0.CO;2-L" target="_blank" rel="noopener">emotional responses to them</a>. In fact, involuntary memories tend to be <a href="https://royalsocietypublishing.org/doi/full/10.1098/rstb.2019.0693" target="_blank" rel="noopener">more negative than voluntary memories</a>. Negative memories also tend to have a <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1037/1089-2680.5.4.323" target="_blank" rel="noopener">stronger emotional tone</a> than positive memories.</p> <p>Humans are more motivated to avoid bad outcomes, bad situations, and bad definitions of ourselves than to seek out good ones. This is likely due to the pressing need for survival in the world: physically, mentally, and socially.</p> <p>So involuntary memories can make us feel acutely sad, anxious, and even ashamed of ourselves. For example, a memory involving embarrassment or shame might indicate to us we have done something others might find to be distasteful or negative, or in some way we have violated social norms.</p> <p>These emotions are important for us to feel, and we learn from our memories and these emotional responses to manage future situations differently.</p> <p><strong>Does this happen to some people more than others?</strong></p> <p>This is all well and good, and mostly we’re able to remember our past and experience the emotions without too much distress. But it may happen for some people more than others, and with stronger emotions attached.</p> <p>One clue as to why comes from research on <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2023-06108-001" target="_blank" rel="noopener">mood-congruent memory</a>. This is the tendency to be more likely to recall memories which are consistent with our <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1002/(SICI)1099-0720(199610)10:5%3C435::AID-ACP408%3E3.0.CO;2-L" target="_blank" rel="noopener">current mood</a>.</p> <figure class="align-right zoomable"><a href="https://images.theconversation.com/files/493442/original/file-20221104-13-e9jr5g.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=45&amp;auto=format&amp;w=1000&amp;fit=clip"><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/493442/original/file-20221104-13-e9jr5g.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=45&amp;auto=format&amp;w=237&amp;fit=clip" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/493442/original/file-20221104-13-e9jr5g.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=45&amp;auto=format&amp;w=600&amp;h=900&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/493442/original/file-20221104-13-e9jr5g.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=30&amp;auto=format&amp;w=600&amp;h=900&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/493442/original/file-20221104-13-e9jr5g.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=15&amp;auto=format&amp;w=600&amp;h=900&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/493442/original/file-20221104-13-e9jr5g.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=45&amp;auto=format&amp;w=754&amp;h=1131&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/493442/original/file-20221104-13-e9jr5g.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=30&amp;auto=format&amp;w=754&amp;h=1131&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/493442/original/file-20221104-13-e9jr5g.jpg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&amp;q=15&amp;auto=format&amp;w=754&amp;h=1131&amp;fit=crop&amp;dpr=3 2262w" alt="Man at desk thinking" /></a><figcaption><em><span class="caption">Ruminating is often unhelpful.</span> <span class="attribution"><span class="source">pexels/olia danilevich</span>, <a class="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">CC BY</a></span></em></figcaption></figure> <p>So, if you’re feeling sad, well, you’re more likely to recall memories related to disappointments, loss or shame. Feeling anxious or bad about yourself? You’re more likely to recall times when you felt scared or unsure.</p> <p>In some mental health disorders, such as <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0272735817303914?casa_token=k0OOX1ybROYAAAAA:UXy5KQk-_8h37dwSCDJqkoFebDn3b5atTodeeF0eYGeHjgtimUUcznPX9_Sxmq-5QsYx5gcUFQ" target="_blank" rel="noopener">major depression</a>, people more often recall memories that evoke negative feelings, the negative feelings are relatively stronger, and these feelings of shame or sadness are perceived as facts about themselves. That is, feelings become facts.</p> <p>Another thing that is more likely in some mental health disorders is <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0005796720300243?casa_token=eaQkokETnM8AAAAA:WjFF1oStuF9VUm7KWdP1zwd7CluYm9M5YZKTotYEV8v0ijZDJ2eDSLdv_Di6kICGw7h59kmW4y4" target="_blank" rel="noopener">rumination</a>. When we ruminate, we repetitively think about negative past experiences and how we feel or felt about them.</p> <p>On the surface, the function of rumination is to try and “work out” what happened and learn something or problem-solve so these experiences do not happen again. While this is good idea in theory, when we ruminate we become stuck in the past and re-experience negative emotions <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0005796720300243?casa_token=eaQkokETnM8AAAAA:WjFF1oStuF9VUm7KWdP1zwd7CluYm9M5YZKTotYEV8v0ijZDJ2eDSLdv_Di6kICGw7h59kmW4y4" target="_blank" rel="noopener">without much benefit</a>.</p> <p>Not only that, but it means those memories in our neural networks become more strongly connected with other information, and are even more likely to then be <a href="https://www.pnas.org/doi/abs/10.1073/pnas.1800006115" target="_blank" rel="noopener">recalled involuntarily</a>.</p> <p><strong>Can we stop the negative feelings?</strong></p> <p>The good news is memories are very adaptable. When we recall a memory we can elaborate on it and change our thoughts, feelings, and appraisals of past experiences.</p> <p>In a process referred to as “<a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/buy/2018-24701-001" target="_blank" rel="noopener">reconsolidation</a>”, changes can be made so the next time that memory is recalled it is different to what it once was and has a changed emotional tone.</p> <p>For example, we might remember a time when we felt anxious about a test or a job interview that didn’t go so well and feel sad or ashamed. Reflecting, elaborating and reframing that memory might involve remembering some aspects of it that did go well, integrating it with the idea that you stepped up to a challenge even though it was hard, and reminding yourself it’s okay to feel anxious or disappointed about difficult things and it does not make us a failure or a bad person.</p> <p>Through this process of rewriting experiences in a way that is reasonable and self-compassionate, their prominence in our life and self-concept can be reduced, and <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/13607863.2011.651434" target="_blank" rel="noopener">our well-being can improve</a>.</p> <p>As for rumination, <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0272735813001207?casa_token=arG_36s8na4AAAAA:Wrlcppj451P7mZlxg44UyooaM25GpoEwTFtx5gfHFc-k2M2cWCXXO75JYC9P7DnMKF7vw7SlcA" target="_blank" rel="noopener">one evidenced-based strategy</a> is to recognise when it is happening and try to shift attention onto something absorbing and sensorial (for example doing something with your hands or focusing on sights or sounds). This attention shifting can short circuit rumination and get you doing something more valued.</p> <p>Overall, remember that even though our brain will give us little reminders of our experiences, we don’t have to be stuck in the past.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/190535/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em>Writen by David John Hallford. Republished with permission from <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-do-i-remember-embarrassing-things-ive-said-or-done-in-the-past-and-feel-ashamed-all-over-again-190535" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Conversation</a>.</em></p> <p><em>Image: Getty Images</em></p>

Mind

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Internet spooked after young boy "proves" he is the reincarnation of a dead woman

<p>A five-year-old boy has insisted to his mum that he has lived a past life as a woman named Pam, which has left viewers spooked with his "scary" story. </p> <p>Five-year-old Luke Ruehlman has claimed that he used to be a woman since he was just two years old. </p> <p>While his mother, Erika, brushed off his stories as an over-active imagination, his comments became increasingly peculiar as he grew older. </p> <p>“He’d say, ‘When I was a girl, I had black hair’ or he’d say, ‘I used to have earrings like that when I was a girl’,” Erika told US television network <a href="https://fox2now.com/news/do-you-believe-in-past-lives-toddlers-testimony-has-family-questioning-if-he-was-a-chicago-woman/" target="_blank" rel="noopener" data-link-type="article-inline">Fox 2</a>.</p> <p>She also said Luke spoke about a woman called Pam from a young age, although the family didn’t know anyone by that name.</p> <p>It was one fleeting comment that left Erika gobsmacked. </p> <p>“I was like, ‘Who is Pam?’,” Erika said.</p> <p>“That’s when he turned to me and said, ‘Well I was’.</p> <p>“I said, ‘What do you mean you were?’</p> <p>“He was like, ‘Well I used to be, but I died and I went up to heaven and I saw God and eventually God pushed me back down.</p> <p>“When I woke up I was a baby and you named me Luke’.”</p> <p>Adding to the spine-tingling comments, Luke insisted to his mum that he had died in a fire in Chicago - a city he had never been to.</p> <p>Erika did some research and discovered that an African-American woman by the name of Pamela Robinson had indeed died after jumping from a window to escape a massive fire in the Illinois city in 1993.</p> <p>Luke's parents decided to put him to the test, showing him a series of photos of different women. </p> <p>They were shocked and a little bit spooked when he picked out the correct photo of Pam. </p> <p>“He goes, ‘Well I don’t recognise anybody. But, I remember when this one was taken’,” his mum said of the moment he pointed at the right image.</p> <p>Luke’s claim has left the internet spooked, with some calling the story “crazy s***”.</p> <p>“That’s scary,” one viewer wrote on TikTok.</p> <p><em>Image credits: YouTube</em></p>

Family & Pets

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“A pain in the a***”: Security expert reveals why woman posing as Prince Andrew’s fiancée got past security

<p dir="ltr">A woman claiming to be Prince Andrew’s fiancée was able to get past security because staff were too “terrified” to check with the royal according to a specialist detective.</p> <p dir="ltr">The Spanish woman claimed to be Irene Windsor and was due to have dinner with the Duke of York when she arrived at the security gate of the Royal Lodge in Winsdor last April, and was allowed in without her identification checked.</p> <p dir="ltr">Her cab fare was even paid for by security officers, with her cover eventually blown when she entered the building and a suspicious staff member alerted police - but not before she walked around the grounds for up to 40 minutes.</p> <p dir="ltr">Philip Grindell, the founder of VIP security firm Defuse and a former specialist detective with the Met Police, has now claimed that staff were reluctant to check the woman’s story with Prince Andrew because of his reputation.</p> <p dir="ltr">Grindell, who was responsible for planning and running security measures for high-profile events that included those with royals and the military, made the claims while speaking at the International Security Expo in London, describing the royal as an “unpleasant character”.</p> <p dir="ltr">"Prince Andrew is a pain in the a*** and if you have ever worked with him, is an unpleasant character and the security were terrified of asking him 'is anyone turning up?'” Grindell said.</p> <p dir="ltr">"And because they did not want to upset him, no one asked and they assumed he must have an appointment and let her in.</p> <p dir="ltr">"The security were terrified of asking him."</p> <p dir="ltr">Paul Page, a former Met Police royal protection officer, separately shared a similar account about working with the controversial royal.</p> <p dir="ltr">"When I heard this it became blatantly obvious that the security involved were in the same position with Prince Andrew as I was 20 years ago, in that they were too frightened to question unidentified female visitors as it would always end in him abusing us for stopping them,” he said at the expo.</p> <p dir="ltr">"This is a classic example of what we feared would happen one day."</p> <p dir="ltr">At the time, the woman was found with maps of the Royal Lodge and other royal residences, as well as a self-defence key ring with two sharp prongs.</p> <p dir="ltr">She was arrested on suspicion of burglary before being sectioned under the Mental Health Act and eventually released without charge.</p> <p><span id="docs-internal-guid-bfff73ff-7fff-7826-a75c-88d6a93cf36c"></span></p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image: Getty Images</em></p>

Legal

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Readers Respond: What is something from the past that you wish would be brought back?

<p dir="ltr">We all do it. Sit there and reminisce about the good ol’ days. </p> <p dir="ltr">Life was good back then…it still is now but we can all admit there are some things we wish would have stayed the same.</p> <p dir="ltr">We asked our readers to share something from the past that they wish would be brought back and it appears that most of you agreed on a common answer: respect.</p> <p dir="ltr">Check out some of your other responses below. </p> <p dir="ltr">Kathryn Potter - Manners, respect, common sense and dignity but also I would love the simpler times back too!</p> <p dir="ltr">Raelene Oliver - Respect, honesty and caring for each other.</p> <p dir="ltr">Suzanne Stovel - No welfare. People actually having to work, to have money. Qualified tradespeople. Less dependence on technology.</p> <p dir="ltr">Carol Edmonds - SPs made by Peters ice cream, strawberry and pineapple ice cream covered in chocolate. </p> <p dir="ltr">Dawn Dominick - The city of old...was always a treat to go to the city in the 60s.</p> <p dir="ltr">Valerie Keily - Decent radio stations and local TV stations have more local shows and also variety shows.</p> <p dir="ltr">Adrian Whiley - Everything. Life was so much simpler back then. Also manners and respect. Since social media people have forgotten how to talk to each other. It's all done by texting.</p> <p dir="ltr">Lois Sullivan - Close all shops by 12 noon on Saturday, open 9am Monday. All workers need time out also. Worked very well for us as kids.</p> <p dir="ltr">Marion Bradley - Good old fashioned cooking. (Less processed) Parental control over your child. Respect, responsibility for your actions. Manners.</p> <p dir="ltr">Yvonne Dyer - Simple ways of living. Far too many choices with everything.</p> <p dir="ltr">Share something you wish would be brought back <a href="https://www.facebook.com/oversixtyNZ/posts/pfbid0egPYdDmX2RFE9TAVpXXargvuztYFrC2wEZTJR17GpW8F9GVvgzGh9RWH3S19hPr3l" target="_blank" rel="noopener">here</a>.</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image: Shutterstock</em></p>

Retirement Life

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Unlikely hack makes ironing a thing of the past

<p>Wishing you could find a way to make ironing a thing of the past?</p> <p>Well, you’re in luck. This clever grandma has come up with a genius hack for crease-free clothing – and best of all, there is no iron in sight.</p> <p>The savvy nan called Babs, also known as brunchwithbabs on Instagram, shared the hack on her page and she’s gone viral.</p> <p>The US-based grandmother who calls herself the “internet mom/grandma you didn’t know you needed” shares all kinds of advice on her page gaining her quite the following.</p> <p>Captioning the video showing how to remove creases from clothes without an iron, Babs writes:</p> <p>“Babs Hack *tip: high heat, works great on cotton and another option is throwing in a damp rag which also works like a charm.”</p> <p>In the footage, Babs asks viewers, ”Do you like to iron on a beautiful sunny day? Me neither.</p> <p>”Try ice cubes instead.”</p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cdalnisloi4/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cdalnisloi4/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Babs (@brunchwithbabs)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>“Four to five ice cubes right in,” she revealed, before adding that you should let the ice cubes do their magic for 10 to 15 minutes.</p> <p>At the end of the video, Babs can be seen removing the dresses and showing they are wrinkle-free.</p> <p>The video has been viewed more than 50,000 times and her fans are impressed. Let us know if you've tried this genius hack.</p>

Home Hints & Tips

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Reader’s Respond: What’s different about growing up today from when you were growing up?

<p dir="ltr">We asked you to take a trip down memory and reminisce about what has changed since growing up. </p> <p dir="ltr">From walking to school alone to not having social media, neighbours being like family to the point of not having to lock your front door – here are just some of the amazing and touching memories you shared. </p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>Faye Birtwistle</strong> - Safety. We were able to walk to school safely. Doors were never locked, you were able to sleep out on the veranda, neighbours were like family, we were taught respect for parents teachers police and adults.</p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>John Barbuto</strong> - We were very lucky there was no unsocial media, we actually spoke to each other. </p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>Yvonne Vishnich</strong> - We had boundaries and rules to abide by, if we didn't conform there was a punishment, grounded or not allowed something that was wanted. Manners had to be used and no answering back.</p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>Marje Brugel </strong>- We weren't reliant on technology and the need to constantly communicate. We wrote letters by hand and we relied on our own ability rather than a calculator. If our parents said "No", we knew they meant it and stress-related illness was rarely heard of.</p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>Jenni Champion</strong> - We were safe playing outside, no mobile phones, no TV, radios and used our imagination.</p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>Christine Rennie</strong> - Family values. Spending time together and grandparents were a special part of the family unit...sadly not anymore.</p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>Carolyn Zillman</strong> - So much stress in children’s lives today. We just lived our lives really not knowing what was going on around us. We enjoyed being kids knowing our parents were looking after us. The pressure on children today is tremendous and everything is so expensive to be involved in.</p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>Joy Flint</strong> - We had so much freedom after school and enjoyed playing without TV or internet always obeyed parents and teachers. </p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>Samantha Elliott</strong> - I didn't get a phone until I was 11, we spent most days outside, played with our cousins and went swimming once a week.</p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>Sharon Hemus</strong> - We had freedom to be kids.</p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>Patricia Phillips-Johnson</strong> - Fewer choices, you ate at meals no matter what it was…no snacks, no screens, you wore what was on the chair…generally hand me downs.</p> <p dir="ltr"><strong>Sue Smith</strong> - We spent more time outside playing seeing friends.</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image: Shutterstock</em></p>

Retirement Life

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Past policies have created barriers to voting in remote First Nations communities

<p>The rate of voter participation in federal elections by people living in remote Indigenous communities has been <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-8497.2010.01552.x" target="_blank" rel="noopener">lower than the national average</a> since First Nations people were granted the right to vote in 1962. In recent years, the rate has been in <a href="http://doi.org/10.22459/DAER.05.2012;%20http://doi.org/10.25911/5df209771dd57" target="_blank" rel="noopener">decline</a>. Rates are lowest in the Northern Territory.</p> <p>The low rate of participation among First Nations people living in remote communities could affect the lower house election results in the Northern Territory seat of Lingiari. Warren Snowden has stepped down after 20 years holding the seat.</p> <p><strong>Determining rates of voter participation</strong></p> <p>Measuring the number of First Nations people (or any particular demographic group) who vote in federal elections is challenging. Electoral rolls do not include information about cultural identity. Census figures, which could be used as a basis for comparison against voter turnout rates, are imprecise.</p> <p>Data from the 2005 NT Assembly general election <a href="http://doi.org/10.22459/DAER.05.2012;%20https:/press.anu.edu.au/publications/directions-australian-electoral-reform" target="_blank" rel="noopener">show</a> voting rates were 20% lower in electorates with the highest Indigenous populations.</p> <p>In his study of the 2019 federal election, Australian National University researcher <a href="http://doi.org/10.25911/5df209771dd57" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Will Sanders</a> found</p> <blockquote> <p>perhaps only half of eligible Aboriginal citizens […] may be utilising their right to vote.</p> </blockquote> <p>Reports from the Northern Territory’s most recent Assembly election also found <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-08-21/poor-indigenous-voter-turnout-at-nt-election/12580688" target="_blank" rel="noopener">record low</a><a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-08-15/coronavirus-impacting-on-remote-voter-turnout-nt-election/12559066">turnout</a> across Indigenous communities.</p> <p><a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-8497.2010.01552.x" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Research</a> <a href="http://doi.org/10.25911/5df209771dd57" target="_blank" rel="noopener">shows</a> rates of informal votes are also higher in remote Indigenous communities.</p> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <p dir="ltr" lang="en">NLC accuses the Australian Electoral Commission of 'failing' Aboriginal voters [Matt Garrick, ABC]<br />Northern Territory land council has accused the AEC of failing Aboriginal people by not engaging more bush voters to have their say at the federal election.<a href="https://t.co/fCKRluGaoD">https://t.co/fCKRluGaoD</a> <a href="https://t.co/J3a04DyJJB">pic.twitter.com/J3a04DyJJB</a></p> <p>— First Nations Tgraph (@FNTelegraph) <a href="https://twitter.com/FNTelegraph/status/1514025685521952770?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 12, 2022</a></p></blockquote> <p><strong>Barriers to First Nations people voting</strong></p> <p>Decisions made at the federal level over the last three decades appear to have provided significant obstacles to voting in some First Nations communities.</p> <p>First is the 1996 abolition of the Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander Election Education and Information Service.</p> <p><a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-8497.2010.01552.x" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Two</a> <a href="http://doi.org/10.22459/DAER.05.2012;%20https:/press.anu.edu.au/publications/directions-australian-electoral-reform" target="_blank" rel="noopener">studies</a> point to this abolition as a potential reason for a decline in voting rates in remote Indigenous communities since the mid-nineties.</p> <p>Established in 1979, this service existed specifically to increase voter registration rates among First Nations people. This was done by, for example, providing voter education and election materials in Indigenous languages.</p> <p>The second decision was the 2005 abolition of the Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander Commission.</p> <p>First Nations people participated in five of the Commission’s elections administered by the same Australian Electoral Commission responsible for federal elections. Although voting was voluntary, <a href="https://openresearch-repository.anu.edu.au/bitstream/1885/41511/3/2003_DP252.pdf" target="_blank" rel="noopener">analysis</a> shows participation was higher in northern and central Australia than in southern Australia.</p> <p>The third relevant policy change was the passage of the 2006 Electoral Integrity Bill. This introduced more stringent rules for the identification required to vote, making it more difficult for people in <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-8497.2010.01552.x" target="_blank" rel="noopener">at least one remote community</a> to register to vote.</p> <p>The Morrison government’s unsuccessful 2021 proposal to introduce even tougher <a href="https://www.canberratimes.com.au/story/7488468/govt-accused-of-trumpist-move-to-suppress-voting/?cs=14264" target="_blank" rel="noopener">voter identification laws</a> would likely <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2021/oct/27/proposed-voter-id-laws-real-threat-to-rights-of-indigenous-australians-and-people-without-homes" target="_blank" rel="noopener">exacerbate this problem</a>.</p> <p>The fourth policy decision was a 2012 change to the Commonwealth Electoral Act, known as the “Federal Direct Enrolment and Update”.</p> <p>This enabled the Australian Electoral Commission to register eligible Australians to vote based on information available through several government agencies. These include Centrelink/the Department of Human Services, the Australian Taxation Office, and the National Exchange of Vehicle and Driver Information Service.</p> <p>But the Electoral Commission has <a href="http://doi.org/10.25911/5df209771dd57" target="_blank" rel="noopener">chosen not to use this mechanism for enrolment in parts of Australia</a> where mail is sent to a single community address (“mail exclusion areas”).</p> <p>This means people living in many remote communities are not automatically added to the electoral roll, unlike most of the rest of Australia.</p> <p>West Arnhem Regional Council mayor Matthew Ryan and Yalu Aboriginal Corporation chairman Ross Mandi launched an official complaint to the Australian Human Rights Commissioner over this issue in June last year.</p> <p>They <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2021-06-19/nt-voters-racial-discrimination-human-rights-commission/100227762" target="_blank" rel="noopener">argued</a> failure to apply the Federal Direct Enrolment and Update in remote communities represents a breach of the Racial Discrimination Act.</p> <p>A <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-8497.2010.01552.x" target="_blank" rel="noopener">survey</a> of residents in one remote community on South Australia’s APY lands found a lack of information contributed to low participation in elections.</p> <p>Obstacles included:</p> <ul> <li> <p>a lack of materials available in appropriate languages</p> </li> <li> <p>uncertainty about how to cast a formal vote</p> </li> <li> <p>problems related to literacy, and</p> </li> <li> <p>a lack of appropriate identification necessary to enrol.</p> </li> </ul> <p>In October last year, the Australian Electoral Commission announced new funding for its <a href="https://www.aec.gov.au/media/2021/10-28.htm" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Indigenous Electoral Participation program</a> with the aim of increasing enrolment rates; the upcoming election will show if the program is working.</p> <p><strong>Lingiari</strong></p> <p>Given that voting is compulsory in Australia, non-participation is a concern in any election. But these issues are likely to be particularly relevant in the 2022 federal election, at least in the seat of Lingiari.</p> <p>Lingiari covers all of the Northern Territory outside the greater Darwin/Palmerston area. So it is the one House of Representatives division where Indigenous Australians (many of them living in remote communities) have clear electoral <a href="http://doi.org/10.25911/5df209771dd57" target="_blank" rel="noopener">power</a>.</p> <p>Providing more mobile polling booths could help make voting easier for people in remote Indigenous communities. Currently, these booths can be present for as little as two hours during an entire election period.</p> <p>There is also <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-8497.2010.01552.x" target="_blank" rel="noopener">evidence</a> Indigenous people are more likely to vote in elections for Indigenous candidates, and for candidates who have visited their community.</p> <p>Warren Snowden has represented the electorate since its creation in 2001, but he is not contesting this election; the seat is up for grabs.</p> <p>Indigenous people will determine who takes Snowden’s place. But how many of them vote may be limited by their ability to enrol, the availability of information in an appropriate language, and access a polling booth.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/181194/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/morgan-harrington-1207111" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Morgan Harrington</a>, Research Fellow, Centre for Aboriginal Economic Policy Research, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/australian-national-university-877" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Australian National University</a></em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/past-policies-have-created-barriers-to-voting-in-remote-first-nations-communities-181194" target="_blank" rel="noopener">original article</a>.</em></p> <p><em>Image: The Australian Electoral Commision (<a href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/auselectoralcom/48720382352/in/album-72157710806573631/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Flickr</a>)</em></p>

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Peter van Onselen reveals past abuse in debate with Grace Tame

<p dir="ltr"><em>Content warning: This article mentions paedophilia, child sexual abuse and rape.</em></p> <p dir="ltr">Grace Tame has called out Peter van Onselen, after the pair engaged in a heated conversation on Twitter that saw him disclose that he was also a victim of child sexual abuse.</p> <p dir="ltr">Van Onselen previously wrote in <em>The Australian </em>that he was “lucky” to not be abused by a notorious paedophile he had gained the attention of, and has now said that wasn’t the case.</p> <p><span id="docs-internal-guid-efd29e63-7fff-4e4d-1ca1-6027eb4c3f72"></span></p> <p dir="ltr">The conversation was sparked by van Onselen commenting on a separate tweet by Dr Gemma Carey, suggesting that her family being banned from the GP clinic they had been seeing for a long time was “a sign that you’re a complete pain in the arse”.</p> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <p dir="ltr" lang="en">That’s how I felt when as a survivor myself of child sexual abuse (he was convicted) she accused me of being a threat to my wife. Unfortunately you then helped her raise money when I had the temerity to ask her to apologise. Thanks for all your support.</p> <p>— Peter van Onselen 🎣 (@vanOnselenP) <a href="https://twitter.com/vanOnselenP/status/1509487096087838722?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">March 31, 2022</a></p></blockquote> <p dir="ltr">Grace Tame retweeted a screenshot of his comment with the caption, “When you victimise a vulnerable person, that’s a pretty good sign too.”</p> <p dir="ltr">This prompted van Onselen to say he was a victim of child sexual abuse from a person who was convicted at the time that he shared his story to police.</p> <p dir="ltr">Tame replied noting that the person who he said abused him hadn’t been convicted of crimes against him, writing that “co-opting other survivors’ experiences is a whole new low, mate”.</p> <p dir="ltr">Van Onselen also said Tame forced him to make the disclosure after she accused him of co-opting the stories of other victims of the same person.</p> <p dir="ltr">“You have made me say this which is incredibly distressing but there you go,” he wrote. “The police knew of three other boys he raped who didn’t want to testify. I was one of them.”</p> <p dir="ltr"><span id="docs-internal-guid-c9360548-7fff-98c4-be3f-6ea3a0913765"></span></p> <p dir="ltr">“I was going off your own words, Peter. You are responsible for when and what you publicly disclose, not me. I ask again that you leave me alone now,” Tame replied, attaching a screenshot from his article in <em>The Australian</em>.</p> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <p dir="ltr" lang="en">That’s how I felt when as a survivor myself of child sexual abuse (he was convicted) she accused me of being a threat to my wife. Unfortunately you then helped her raise money when I had the temerity to ask her to apologise. Thanks for all your support.</p> <p>— Peter van Onselen 🎣 (@vanOnselenP) <a href="https://twitter.com/vanOnselenP/status/1509487096087838722?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">March 31, 2022</a></p></blockquote> <p dir="ltr">“Like lots of survivors I have sought to not go public about what happened to me. I spoke to the police about exactly that as my abuser was being sentenced. Please stop shaming me for not having your courage to choose to go public.”</p> <p dir="ltr">“I have not shamed you, not once,” Tame replied. “You’re manipulating this entire situation. I have pointed out exactly what I have known to be true.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Tame returned to Twitter on Friday morning to explain the situation.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I stood up for a friend whom Peter demeaned unsolicitedly,” she wrote.</p> <p dir="ltr">“He then used ‘convicted’ paedophilia survivorship as a defence, in a tweet he copied and pasted several times - to me a paedophilia survivor. </p> <p dir="ltr">“Prior, he publicly aserted me he was “not sexually abused”, so I called him out.”</p> <p dir="ltr"><span id="docs-internal-guid-6b4eeb3f-7fff-b3a1-9376-35d9f05c57ec"></span></p> <p dir="ltr">Earlier the same day, she asserted that every survivor “deserves to be heard and respected”, but that trauma shouldn’t “excuse bad behaviour”.</p> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <p dir="ltr" lang="en">Every survivor of rape and abuse deserves to be heard and receive compassion. Every single one.</p> <p>Trauma, however, doesn’t excuse bad behaviour. It is not a weapon of provocation or oneupmanship to deploy in the face of others at your convenience, especially not fellow survivors.</p> <p>— Grace Tame (@TamePunk) <a href="https://twitter.com/TamePunk/status/1509669097759723523?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">March 31, 2022</a></p></blockquote> <p dir="ltr">“It is not a weapon of provocation or one-up-manship to deploy in the face of others at your convenience, especially not fellow survivors.”</p> <p dir="ltr">Van Onselen originally wrote that he had been groomed by a paedophile but had not been abused in his <em>The Australian</em> piece.</p> <p dir="ltr">“To be very clear from the outset, I was not sexually abused, I am one of the lucky ones” he wrote at the time. </p> <p dir="ltr">“But only just. A teacher … tried to sexually assault me on a school trip. He was convicted for doing so to three other boys on that same trip.”</p> <p dir="ltr">But, he also wrote that he may have “dissociated” during the abuse and may “have blocked more that happened”.</p> <p dir="ltr">In his latest online spat, the Project co-host also referred to a previous altercation with Dr Carey, when he had threatened to sue her over a tweet suggesting he was a danger to his wife in an old photo with Christian Porter.</p> <p dir="ltr"><span id="docs-internal-guid-bb3532b8-7fff-cbec-0089-5e80c870db32"></span></p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image: Roy Vandervegt (Adelaide Festival) / Getty Images</em></p>

News

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The gruesome past of the Amityville Horror house

<p dir="ltr">The Dutch Colonial house that stands at 112 Ocean Avenue in Amityville, New York, became known as the terrifying scene of horror that was the inspiration behind the iconic horror movie named after the town. </p> <p dir="ltr">The history of the house was so terrifying that one former owner was prompted to call in a priest, while another owner requested that the address of the house be changed. </p> <p dir="ltr">The dark past of the home stems back to November 1974, when 23-year-old Robert DeFeo Jr murdered six members of his family, including his parents, as they slept.</p> <p dir="ltr">The house then remained empty until over one year later, when new owners George and Kathy Lutz moved in with their three children in December 1975.</p> <p dir="ltr">The Lutzes paid just US$80,000 for the five-bedroom property, which is more than US$410,000 ($542,000 AUD) in today's money.</p> <p dir="ltr">The family were aware of the home’s grim past and public stigma, but agreed they would work through it and cope with the public perception. </p> <p dir="ltr">However, just to be sure, they called in a local priest to bless the house.</p> <p dir="ltr">Mr Lutz told ABC News that they called in the priest after unexplainable things started to occur in the house. </p> <p dir="ltr">He said the priest claimed he felt a slap from an unseen hand in the sewing room and heard a voice say “get out”. He then felt sick and his hands began to bleed.</p> <p dir="ltr">Mr Lutz claimed that one night he also witnessed his wife levitating and claims he also heard his children's beds "flaming up and down on the floor".</p> <p dir="ltr">After just 28 days, the Lutzes fled the home and their lives returned to normal. </p> <p dir="ltr">At trial for the murder of his family, Robert DeFeo Jr pleaded not guilty by reason of insanity, which was rejected by the jury who sentenced him to six sentences of 25 years to life. </p> <p dir="ltr">The Lutzes secured a book deal about their alleged experiences in the home, with <em>The Amityville Horror: A True Story</em> selling more than 6 million copies, as well as being adapted into two films. </p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Image credits: Realtor.com</em></p>

Real Estate

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Fresh insight into troubled past of Cleo's alleged abductor

<p><em><strong>Content warning: This article contains references to deceased Indigenous individuals. </strong></em></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Audio has emerged of the woman who raised Terence Darrell Kelly, Cleo Smith’s alleged abductor, revealing that he had a tumultuous early life.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The 36-year-old Carnarvon man was removed from his mother’s care as a two-year-old and was raised by Penny Walker, a respected member of the Indigenous community.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">“His mum didn’t want him and she threw him away,” she </span><a href="https://www.perthnow.com.au/news/cleo-smith/cleo-smith-found-accused-kidnapper-terence-darrell-kellys-traumatic-childhood-revealed-c-4476537"><span style="font-weight: 400;">said </span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">in an interview from 2019.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">“I looked down at him and this little boy - God was giving me something back in my life what the welfare took off me - my children.”</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Ms Walker said Mr Kelly’s mother was a drug addict and didn’t want him.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">She then took him in and raised him alongside her two grandsons - who she was caring for after her daughter died from multiple sclerosis (MS).</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">In the </span><a rel="noopener" href="https://www.watoday.com.au/national/western-australia/audio-files-reveal-difficult-upbringing-of-cleo-smith-s-alleged-abductor-terence-kelly-20211108-p596y8.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-weight: 400;">interview</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">, she also spoke about her own traumatic childhood as a member of the Stolen Generation. She spoke of the poor treatment she received as a child at the Moore River Native Settlement and New Norcia Mission, where she was the victim of sexual abuse and beatings.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Ms Walker said this led her to become an alcoholic, which resulted in her six children being taken away. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">She then turned her life around and became a respected member of the Indigenous community in Carnarvon.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Ms Walker died in 2020, leaving Mr Kelly alone in their Carnarvon home.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">When police arrived at the home last week, they found Cleo in a room sitting upright and playing with toys.</span></p> <p><img style="width: 500px; height:281.25px;" src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/7845436/terence-kelly1.jpg" alt="" data-udi="umb://media/e959eb1a366f41e8bff36ecb3282bf94" /></p> <p><em><span style="font-weight: 400;">Terence Darrell Kelly boards a plane to Perth, where he will stay in custody until he returns to court in December. Image: Getty Images</span></em></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Mr Kelly was then arrested and faced Carnarvon Magistrate’s Court for several </span><a rel="noopener" href="https://www.oversixty.com.au/news/news/i-m-coming-for-you-suspect-charged-in-cleo-s-alleged-abduction" target="_blank"><span style="font-weight: 400;">charges</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">, including forcibly taking a child under 16.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">His neighbours described Mr Kelly as a “quiet” and “lonely” individual.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The day after his court appearance, he was flown from Carnarvon to Perth and spent his first night in a maximum-security prison.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Detectives have since returned to his home as part of their investigation into Cleo’s abduction.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Police said they don’t believe the alleged abduction was planned and are investigating a theory that Mr Kelly came across Cleo by chance, according to </span><a rel="noopener" href="https://www.perthnow.com.au/news/cleo-smith/cleo-smith-found-accused-kidnapper-terence-darrell-kellys-traumatic-childhood-revealed-c-4476537" target="_blank"><span style="font-weight: 400;">news.com.au</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Mr Kelly has been remanded in custody for four weeks and is due to return to court in December.</span></p> <p><em><span style="font-weight: 400;">Image: Getty Images</span></em></p>

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Chilling reincarnation stories: meet 6 people who’ve lived before

<p>“When I was your age, I changed your diaper,” said the dark-haired boy to his father.</p> <p>Ron* (* names of boys and their family members were changed to protect privacy) looked down at his smiling son, who had not yet turned two.</p> <p>He thought it was a very strange thing to say, but he figured he had misheard him.</p> <p>But as baby Sam made similar remarks over the next few months, Ron and his wife Cathy gradually pieced together an odd story: Sam believed that he was his deceased grandfather, Ron’s late father, who had returned to his family.</p> <p>More intrigued than alarmed, Ron and Cathy asked Sam, “How did you come back?”</p> <p>“I just went whoosh and came out the portal,” he responded.</p> <p>Although Sam was a precocious child – he’d been speaking in full sentences from the age of 18 months – his parents were stunned to hear him use a word like portal, and they encouraged him to say more.</p> <p>They asked Sam if he’d had any siblings, and he replied that he’d had a sister who “turned into a fish”.</p> <p>“Who turned her into a fish?”</p> <p>“Some bad guys. She died.”</p> <p>Eerily enough, Sam’s grandfather had a sister who had been murdered 60 years earlier; her body was found floating in San Francisco Bay.</p> <p>Ron and Cathy then gently asked Sam, “Do you know how you died?”</p> <p>Sam jerked back and slapped the top of his head as if in pain.</p> <p>One year before Sam was born, his grandfather had died of a cerebral haemorrhage.</p> <h4>Is reincarnation real?</h4> <p>Today more than 75 million people in America – across all religions – believe in reincarnation, according to a Pew Forum on Religion &amp; Public Life poll; a separate survey reports that roughly one in ten people can recall his or her own past life.</p> <p>There have been many reality-TV series and documentaries on the topic such as Ghost Inside My Child, about children with past-life memories, and Reincarnated: Past Lives, in which people go under hypnosis to discover their earlier existences.</p> <p>Why this fascination? Part of reincarnation’s appeal has to do with its hopeful underlying promise: that we can do better in our next lives.</p> <p>“With reincarnation, there is always another opportunity,” explains Stafford Betty, a professor of religious studies at California State University, Bakersfield, and the author of The Afterlife Unveiled.</p> <p>“The universe takes on a merciful hue. It’s a great improvement over the doctrine of eternal hell.”</p> <p>Yet despite the popular interest, few scientists give reincarnation much credence.</p> <p>They regard it as a field filled with charlatans, scams and tall tales of having once been royalty.</p> <p>Reincarnation is “an intriguing psychological phenomenon,” says Christopher C. French, a professor of psychology at Goldsmiths, University of London, who heads a unit that studies claims of paranormal experiences.</p> <p>“But I think it is far more likely that such apparent memories are, in fact, false memories rather than accurate memories of events that were experienced in a past life.”</p> <p>For more than 45 years, a team at the Division of Perceptual Studies at the University of Virginia (UVA) has been collecting stories of people who can recall their past lives.</p> <p>And if the professors determine that there is some merit to these memories, their findings will call into question the idea that our humanity ends with our death.</p> <h4>“Mummy, I’m so homesick”</h4> <p>Among the UVA case studies is the story of a boy named Ryan from Oklahoma, USA.</p> <p>A few years ago, the four-year-old woke up screaming at two in the morning.</p> <p>Over the preceding months, he’d been pleading with his bewildered mother, Cyndi, to take him to the house where he’d “lived before.”</p> <p>In tears, he’d beg her to return him to his glittering life in Hollywood – complete with a big house, a pool, and fast cars – that was so fabulous, he once said, “I can’t live in these conditions. My last home was much better.”</p> <p>When Cyndi went into her son’s room that night, Ryan kept repeating the same words – “Mommy, I’m so homesick” – as she tried to comfort him and rock him to sleep.</p> <p>“He was like a little old man who couldn’t remember all the details of his life. He was so frustrated and sad,” Cyndi says.</p> <p>The next morning, she went to the library, borrowed a pile of books about old Hollywood, and brought them home.</p> <p>With Ryan in her lap, Cyndi went through the volumes; she was hoping the pictures might soothe him.</p> <p>Instead, he became more and more excited as they looked at one particular book.</p> <p>When they came to a still of a scene from a 1932 movie called Night After Night, he stopped her.</p> <p>“Mama,” he shouted, pointing to one of the actors, who wasn’t identified. “That guy’s me! The old me!”</p> <p>“I was shocked,” Cyndi admits. “I never thought that we’d find the person he thought he was.”</p> <p>But she was equally relieved. “Ryan had talked about his other life and been so unhappy, and now we had something to go on.”</p> <p>Although neither Cyndi nor her husband believed in reincarnation, she went back to the library the next day and checked out a book about children who possessed memories of their past lives.</p> <p>At the end of it was a note from the author, Professor Jim Tucker, saying that he wanted to hear from the parents of kids with similar stories.</p> <p>Cyndi sat down to write him a letter.</p> <h4>The ghost hunters</h4> <p><span>Tucker was a child psychiatrist in private practice when he heard about the reincarnation research being conducted by Dr Ian Stevenson, founder and director of the Division of Perceptual Studies at UVA. </span></p> <p><span>He was intrigued and began working with the division in 1996; six years later, when Stevenson retired, Tucker took over as the leader of the division’s past-life research. </span></p> <p><span>T</span><span>he UVA team has gathered more than 2500 documented cases of children from all over the world who have detailed memories of former lives, including that of a California toddler with a surprisingly good golf swing who said he had once been legendary athlete Bobby Jones; a Midwestern five-year-old who shared some of the same memories and physical traits – blindness in his left eye, a mark on his neck, a limp – as a long-deceased brother; and a girl in India who woke up one day and began speaking fluently in a dialect she’d never heard before. </span></p> <p><span>(Tucker describes these cases in his book </span><em>Return to Life: Extraordinary Cases of Children Who Remember Their Past Lives</em><span><em>.</em>)</span></p> <p>The children in the UVA collection typically began talking about their previous lives when they were two or three years old and stopped by the age of six or seven.</p> <p>“That is around the same time that we all lose our memories of early childhood,” Tucker says.</p> <p>When he first learns about a subject, he checks for fraud, deliberate or unconscious, by asking two questions: “Do the parents seem credible?” and “Could the child have picked up the memories through TV, overheard conversations, or other ordinary means?”</p> <p>If he can rule out fraud, he and his team interview the child and his or her family to get a detailed account about the previous life.</p> <p>Then the researchers try to find a deceased person whose life matches the memories.</p> <p>This last part is essential because otherwise the child’s story would be just a fantasy.</p> <p>Close to three-quarters of the cases investigated by the team are “solved”, meaning that a person from the past matching the child’s memories is identified.</p> <p>In addition, nearly 20% of the kids in the UVA cases have naturally occurring marks or impairments that match scars and injuries on the past person.</p> <p>One boy who recalled being shot possessed two birthmarks – a large, ragged one over his left eye and a small, round one on the back of his head – which lined up like a bullet’s entrance and exit wounds.</p> <p>In the case of Ryan, the boy longing for a Hollywood past, an archivist pored over books in a film library until she found a person who appeared to be the man he’d singled out: Hollywood agent Marty Martyn, who made an unbilled cameo in Night After Night.</p> <p>After Cyndi spoke with Tucker, he interviewed Ryan, and then the family contacted Martyn’s daughter.</p> <p>She met with Tucker, Ryan and Cyndi, and along with public records, she confirmed more than 50 details that Ryan had reported about her father’s life, from his work history to the location and contents of his home.</p> <p>Cyndi felt tremendous relief when she was told that her son’s story matched Martyn’s. She says, “He wasn’t crazy! There really was another family.”</p> <h4>Plane on fire!</h4> <p>Tucker learned about the best-known recent reincarnation case study from TV producers.</p> <p>In 2002, he was contacted to work for and appear on a show about reincarnation (the programme never aired) and was told about James Leininger, a four-year-old Louisiana boy who believed that he was once a World War II pilot who had been shot down over Iwo Jima.</p> <p>Bruce and Andrea Leininger first realised that James had these memories when he was two and woke up from a nightmare, yelling, “Airplane crash! Plane on fire! Little man can’t get out!”</p> <p>He also knew details about WWII aircraft that would seem impossible for a toddler to know.</p> <p>For instance, when Andrea referred to an object on the bottom of a toy plane as a bomb, James corrected her by saying it was a drop tank.</p> <p>Another time, he and his parents were watching a History Channel documentary, and the narrator called a Japanese plane a Zero.</p> <p>James insisted that it was a Tony. In both cases, he was right.</p> <p>The boy said that he had also been named James in his previous life and that he’d flown off a ship named the Natoma.</p> <p>The Leiningers discovered a WWII aircraft carrier called the USS Natoma Bay.</p> <p>In its squadron was a pilot named James Huston, who had been killed in action over the Pacific.</p> <p>James talked incessantly about his plane crashing, and he was disturbed by nightmares a few times a week.</p> <p>His desperate mother contacted past-life therapist Carol Bowman for help.</p> <p>Bowman told Andrea not to dismiss what James was saying and to assure him that whatever happened had occurred in another life and body and he was safe now.</p> <p>Andrea followed her advice, and James’s dreams diminished. (His parents coauthored <em>Soul Survivor</em>, a 2009 book about their family’s story.)</p> <p>Professor French, who is familiar with Tucker’s work, says “the main problem with [his] investigating is that the research typically begins long after the child has been accepted as a genuine reincarnation by his or her family and friends.”</p> <p>About James Leininger, French says, “Although his parents insisted they never watched World War II documentaries or talked about military history, we do know that at 18 months of age, James was taken to a flight museum, where he was fascinated by the World War II planes."</p> <p>"In all probability, the additional details were unintentionally implanted by his parents and by a counsellor who was a firm believer in reincarnation.”</p> <p>Tucker says that he has additional documentation for many of James Leininger’s statements, and they were made before anyone in the family had heard of James Huston or the USS Natoma Bay.</p> <p>French responds that “children’s utterances are often ambiguous and open to interpretation.</p> <p>For example, perhaps James said something that just sounded a bit like Natoma?”</p> <p>Bruce Leininger, James’s father, understands French’s disbelief.</p> <p>“I was the original sceptic,” he says. “But the information James gave us was so striking and unusual. If someone wants to look at the facts and challenge them, they’re welcome to examine everything we have.”</p> <p>Bruce laughs at the idea that he and his wife planted the memories, saying, “You try telling a two-year-old what to believe; you’re not going to be able to give them a script.”</p> <h4>The boy who fulfilled his past life’s destiny</h4> <p>Born in Seattle in 1991, Sonam Wangdu was only two years old when he realised he was actually the fourth reincarnation of the original Tibetan lama (“lama” is the Tibetan word for “guru”), Dezhung Rinpoche I.</p> <p>The realisation was the culmination of a number of signs that had been accumulating since before the boy was even born.</p> <p>These included the visions of his mother and her own lama, as well as the words of the third reincarnation of Dezhung, himself (Dezhung Rinpoche III), who informed his acolytes in 1987 (the year of his death), “I will be reborn in Seattle.”</p> <p>In 1996, the boy, who by then only answered to the name, Trulku-la (which means “reincarnation”), left his family – forever – to be raised by monks while studying Tibetan Buddhism in Kathmandu, Nepal and eventually becoming the head of a monastery there.</p> <p>Arriving in Nepal, “dressed in gold and maroon robes and riding on a luggage cart pushed by his mother, the little lama smiled widely,” reported SeattleMet in a 2016 follow-up story tracing the boy’s journey over the past 20 years.</p> <p>“When asked how long he would stay in Nepal, though, the little boy was serene, almost stoic. ‘Lots of time,’ he said. ‘I’m just going to stay here a long time.’”</p> <p>And that has proven to be true. The boy is now in his 23rd year of life as the fourth reincarnation of Dezhung Rinpoche I.</p> <h4>The reincarnation of Franz Lizst</h4> <p><span>Vladimir Levinski, who was born David Secombe in England in the 1930s, had such an innate gift for playing the piano that he was able to teach himself to be a concert pianist (when asked about lessons, he remarked, “I have no time for them, I have a technique of my own.”) </span></p> <p><span>So gifted was Levinski, and at such a young age, that he came to recognise himself as the reincarnation of Franz Lizst, the German composer and pianist. </span></p> <p><span>By age 21, he was performing for packed concert halls and known as the “Paganini of the Piano.” </span></p> <p><span>Unfortunately, Levinski’s interest in Lizst at times came to border on obsession, such as when he was playing a concert on January 23, 1952, and stopped playing halfway through to talk about Lizst. </span></p> <p><span>The audience was disappointed, but Levinski, for his part, felt the concert was a “tremendous success,” in part because he experienced it as only the reincarnation of the renowned composer and performer, Lizst, could.</span></p> <h4>Long live hope</h4> <p>Tucker, too, knows that for most scientists, reincarnation will always seem like a fantastical notion regardless of how much evidence is presented.</p> <p>For him, success doesn’t mean persuading the naysayers to accept the existence of reincarnation but rather encouraging people to consider the meaning of consciousness and how it might survive our deaths.</p> <p>“I believe in the possibility of reincarnation, which is different from saying that I believe in reincarnation,” he explains.</p> <p>“I do think these cases require an explanation that is out of the ordinary, although that certainly doesn’t mean we all reincarnate.”</p> <p>Does Tucker believe that in the future, there will be a child who is able to recall his own memories?</p> <p>“Memories of past lives are not very common, so I don’t expect that,” he says. “But I do hope there’s some continuation after death for me and for all of us.”</p> <p><em>Image credit: Shutterstock</em></p> <p><em>This article first appeared in <a rel="noopener" href="https://www.readersdigest.co.nz/true-stories-lifestyle/thought-provoking/the-children-whove-lived-before" target="_blank">Reader's Digest</a>.</em></p>

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