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The hilarious winners of the Comedy Pet Photography Awards

The finalists of the annual Comedy Pet Photography Awards have been announced, with the winnings photographs showcasing a hilarious selection of animals in unusual predicaments. The competition runs each year and is open to photographers of all level of skill and ability, giving pet owners the chance to share the personalities of their furry friends. According to the website for the competition, the annual contest is designed to "promote positive awareness of animal welfare issues and celebrate the incredible and valuable contribution that pets can and do have on our lives.” "Behind the funny images and videos of the competition, there is a very serious and fundamental message to help, respect and care for our animals in the most humane way possible. And every year as our competition gets a little bigger, the message is getting a little louder and we can help more animals." This year's finalists come from all over the world, and show pets buried in snow, captured in mid-air, caught in the middle of cheeky destructions, and even a horse with no head. Fans can <a href="https://www.comedypetphoto.com/peoples-choice-award/vote-peoples-choice-award.php" target="_blank" rel="noopener">vote</a> for their favourite picture, with the ultimate fan favourite winner taking home a cash prize. Image credits: Comedy Pet Photography Awards

Family & Pets

Is attachment theory actually important for romantic relationships?

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/marissa-nivison-1454992">Marissa Nivison</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-calgary-1318">University of Calgary</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/sheri-madigan-417151">Sheri Madigan</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-calgary-1318">University of Calgary</a> There has been a recent surge of attention toward attachment theory: from <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTL2aW9va/">TikTok videos</a> to <a href="https://quiz.attachmentproject.com/">online quizzes</a> that claim to “assess your attachment style.” It’s become a hot topic, especially in the context of romantic relationships, with <a href="https://medium.com/curious/the-theory-that-explains-all-your-failed-relationships-fb2dc2551617">some articles</a> claiming that one person (or partner’s) attachment styles are the reason why relationships fail. As experts in developmental and clinical psychology focusing on attachment theory, we seek to provide an accessible resource to better understand the science of attachment, and what it means for one’s romantic relationships. <h2>What is attachment?</h2> Attachment theory stems from the field of developmental psychology. It is the notion that in the first year of life, the ways in which a parent and caregiver respond to a child’s needs shape a child’s expectation of relationships across their lifespan. In research, attachment has been associated with well-being across the lifespan including: <a href="https://doi.org/10.1017/S0954579499002035">mental</a> and <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/14616734.2018.1541517">physical</a> health, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/a0032671">brain functioning</a> and even <a href="https://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/document?repid=rep1&type=pdf&doi=092354a82953ac321429f84b00607bcd44ac4c63">romantic relationships</a>. <figure class="align-center "><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/587576/original/file-20240411-16-x97xu0.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/587576/original/file-20240411-16-x97xu0.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=455&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587576/original/file-20240411-16-x97xu0.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=455&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587576/original/file-20240411-16-x97xu0.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=455&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587576/original/file-20240411-16-x97xu0.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=572&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587576/original/file-20240411-16-x97xu0.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=572&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587576/original/file-20240411-16-x97xu0.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=572&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" alt="Illustrations of four different attachment styes" /><figcaption>There are two overarching types of attachment: secure and insecure. Types of insecure attachment include disorganized, avoidant and anxious attachment. (Shutterstock)</figcaption></figure> <h2>How is attachment related to romantic relationships?</h2> Among professionals in the field, there is diversity in perspectives regarding how attachment relates with romantic relationships. As developmental psychologists, we tend to think that attachment is associated with romantic relationships through what we call the “<a href="https://doi.org/10.1080/14616739900134191">internal working model</a>.” In childhood, when a parent is consistent and responsive in tending to their child, the child learns that their parent can be counted on in times of need. These expectations and beliefs about relationships are then internalized as a blueprint, sometimes in popular media referred to as a “<a href="https://medium.com/live-your-life-on-purpose/love-maps-are-a-gamechanger-when-you-have-an-anxious-attachment-style-dc8f219ab0af">love map</a>.” Just like how an architect uses a blueprint to design a building, a child’s attachment to their parents provides a blueprint for understanding how to approach other relationships. Based on this blueprint, people develop expectations of how relationships should work, and how other important people in their life, including partners, should respond to their needs. Sometimes attachment is also described in terms of attachment “styles.” There are two overarching types of attachment: <a href="https://doi.org/10.4324/9780203758045">secure and insecure</a>. Those with a secure attachment style tend to have expectations that their attachment figures (and later, partners) will be responsive, sensitive and caring in times of distress. People with secure “blueprints” find it easier to build new structures (i.e., relationships) with the same design. People with insecure blueprints — such as disorganized, avoidant or anxious attachment styles — may face relationship challenges when their current relationship doesn’t align with their childhood experiences, and may need to renovate their blueprint design together with their partner. Whether you think about attachment as a style or a love map, they both are related to expectations of relationships, which are shaped by past experiences. In research we see that people who had consistent, reliable and sensitive parents are more likely to have more positive relationships — including <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1475-6811.1997.tb00135.x">friendships</a>, <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/cdev.13322">teacher-child relationships</a> and yes, <a href="https://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/document?repid=rep1&type=pdf&doi=092354a82953ac321429f84b00607bcd44ac4c63">romantic relationships too</a>. <h2>Relationships with parents and relationships with partners</h2> Although we do see in research that better childhood relationships are associated with better romantic relationships, there is still a large part of the population who have good relationships with partners, despite their history of lower-quality relationships with their parents. <figure class="align-center "><img src="https://images.theconversation.com/files/587575/original/file-20240411-16-fn5xgk.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&fit=clip" sizes="(min-width: 1466px) 754px, (max-width: 599px) 100vw, (min-width: 600px) 600px, 237px" srcset="https://images.theconversation.com/files/587575/original/file-20240411-16-fn5xgk.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=600&h=453&fit=crop&dpr=1 600w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587575/original/file-20240411-16-fn5xgk.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=600&h=453&fit=crop&dpr=2 1200w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587575/original/file-20240411-16-fn5xgk.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=600&h=453&fit=crop&dpr=3 1800w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587575/original/file-20240411-16-fn5xgk.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=45&auto=format&w=754&h=569&fit=crop&dpr=1 754w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587575/original/file-20240411-16-fn5xgk.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=30&auto=format&w=754&h=569&fit=crop&dpr=2 1508w, https://images.theconversation.com/files/587575/original/file-20240411-16-fn5xgk.jpeg?ixlib=rb-1.1.0&q=15&auto=format&w=754&h=569&fit=crop&dpr=3 2262w" alt="Illustration of loving parents with a child, and the grown child in a loving relationship" /><figcaption>In research we see that people who had consistent, reliable and sensitive parents are more likely to have more positive relationships. (Shutterstock)</figcaption></figure> It is possible for romantic relationships to serve as a <a href="https://doi.org/10.1037/1089-2680.4.2.155">“healing relationship”</a> and improve one’s own internal working model of relationships. Specifically, when a partner is consistently sensitive, responsive and available, a person may begin to adjust their blueprint and develop new expectations from relationships. Attachment theory consistently supports the idea that one’s patterns of attachment <a href="https://eric.ed.gov/?id=EJ960225">can change</a>. So, all in all, the answer is no: Your relationship with your parents influences but does not determine the quality of your romantic relationships. <h2>Is attachment the reason why my relationships don’t work out?</h2> It is possible that your expectations of a romantic relationship may not align with the expectations of your partner, and may affect the quality of the relationship. For example, sometimes individuals with insecure attachments may withdraw when they are upset, but their partner who has a secure attachment may be upset that their partner is not coming to them for comfort. Thinking through your own attachment history and expectations of relationships may be a great opportunity for self-reflection, but it is important to remember that attachment is only one part of a relationship. Communication, trust and respect, to name a few, are also critically important aspects of a relationship. <h2>Can I improve my attachment expectations?</h2> The short answer: Yes! Improving attachment quality has been one of the cornerstones of attachment theory and research since its conception. Most commonly, attachment is targeted in <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC0LCPe5CMarYi1NmqNttDcg/videos">childhood through interventions</a>, but also in adulthood through individual therapy, or various forms of couples therapy, such as <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xaHms5z-yuM">Emotionally Focused Therapy</a> or the <a href="https://www.gottman.com/about/the-gottman-method/">Gottman Method</a>. It is also possible that through positive relationships you may be able to improve your own expectations of relationships. There are many different avenues to explore, but improvement is always possible. In sum, attachment can be an important factor in romantic relationships, but it is not a “catch-all” to be blamed for why relationships may not work out. Thinking about your own expectations for relationships and talking through those with your partner may do great things in improving the quality of your relationships! <img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/226101/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/marissa-nivison-1454992">Marissa Nivison</a>, Postdoctoral Research Fellow, Department of Psychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-calgary-1318">University of Calgary</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/sheri-madigan-417151">Sheri Madigan</a>, Professor, Canada Research Chair in Determinants of Child Development, Owerko Centre at the Alberta Children’s Hospital Research Institute, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-calgary-1318">University of Calgary</a> Image credits: Getty Images This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/is-attachment-theory-actually-important-for-romantic-relationships-226101">original article</a>.

Relationships

Is Valentine’s Day worth the romantic investment? Here’s what we can learn from economics

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/selma-wather-1510222">Selma Wather</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sussex-1218">University of Sussex</a> Expressing affection can be expensive. Spending on heart-shaped gifts, romantic cards, chocolates and flowers (other gifts are available) to celebrate Valentine’s Day has reached <a href="https://www.statista.com/statistics/510981/valentines-day-total-spending-great-britain/#:%7E:text=In%20the%20United%20Kingdom%20%28UK%29%20alone%2C%20Valentine%E2%80%99s%20Day,increased%20by%20just%20over%20300%20million%20British%20pounds.">close to £1 billion</a> in the UK. So the value of Valentine’s to retailers seems clear enough. But just how valuable is the annual ritual to consumers? What return can you expect for the money you invest in that bouquet of roses or candle lit meal? Broadly speaking, and depending on your relationship status, buying into Valentine’s Day traditions suggests two possible scenarios. You might be sending a card or gift to a potential partner to inform them of your interest; or you might be giving something to your current partner to remind them of your continuing love. Research suggests that both options have intrinsic economic value. For those seeking to express interest, sending a card is like dipping your toe into what economists might refer to as the “marriage market” – the search for someone you like, who likes what you have to offer in return. This search can happen smoothly, with plenty of information about your potential match, or it can be paved with obstacles, where you may not know much about who is available, and <a href="https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=1703310">learning about potential partners</a> takes time. So suppose you are searching for a partner, and comprehensive information about potential matches is not freely available. What do you do? One option might be to put all your hopes into meeting someone on your daily journey to work. You pray that one day, just like in the movies, you will simply bump into “the one”. A second option might be to focus your search on single work colleagues, or people you know socially, and send Valentine’s Day cards to those you are attracted to. The option with the highest chance of success is the second one. You are using reliable information – knowledge of who is single. And sending a card to them can provide them with important information about you – that you’re also single, and that you’re interested. This is why research suggests that sending a Valentine’s Day card can be a <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/2938374?origin=crossref">logical investment</a> of time and money. <h2>‘Match quality’</h2> Fast forward five years or so and imagine you are happily married to the recipient of one of those cards. Is it worth repeating the gesture now that you’re settled down together? Economists think of marriages or partnerships as having an inherent “<a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/j.1468-2354.2006.00385.x">match quality</a>”, which reflects how good (or bad) your relationship is – and the likelihood of you breaking up. If match quality falls below the level of happiness you might expect to have if you were to leave, a <a href="https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=2759255">separation may well follow</a>. But many studies also show that <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/2535409">match quality is malleable</a> – that it can change, for better and indeed for worse, over time. You can invest in trying to improve match quality in various ways. It might be starting a family, sharing hobbies and interests, or gestures such as cooking a special meal or exchanging gifts on the 14th day of February. Improving your match quality <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/publication/228431914_How_Does_the_Change_of_Marriage_Quality_Affect_Divorce_Decisions">directly reduces the probability</a> of a separation. Then there’s the question of commitment – the willingness to stay in a relationship rather than walking away. And again, gestures can make a difference. Imagine you have just started a new job, and your employer asks you to complete an intensive training session in your free time, for a skill that would only be useful for that particular role. If you expect to hold the job for a long period, you might happily invest your time. But if your employer is struggling financially and redundancy is on the cards, you are much less likely to agree to perform the task. Relationships work in a similar way. People are more prepared to invest in things like having children or buying a house together if they expect the relationship to last. Given that commitment is not guaranteed by a marriage certificate, people <a href="https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=950688">need to find other ways</a> to signal their continued devotion. Celebrating Valentine’s Day is one way of making such a signal. It can show faith in your shared commitment, signify that you wish to continue investing in the relationship and improve match quality, further stabilising the partnership. So even if deep down you think that Valentine’s Day has become over commercialised and meaningless, research suggests it makes good economic sense to send that card.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/223128/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/selma-wather-1510222">Selma Wather</a>, Senior Lecturer in Economics, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-sussex-1218">University of Sussex</a> Image credits: Getty Images This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/is-valentines-day-worth-the-romantic-investment-heres-what-we-can-learn-from-economics-223128">original article</a>.

Money & Banking

“People don’t understand boundaries”: Woman ruins couple’s romantic proposal

A young couple has been left devastated and mortified after their marriage proposal was crashed by an inconsiderate “Karen” on the beach. Zenicca Llanza, a 24-year-old from the Philippines, shared a video of her boyfriend getting down on one knee at the beach and asking her to marry him. Her partner had arranged a romantic set up on the beach, complete with a tent, picnic table, proposal sign, a cake and rose petals. However, when the time came for him to pop the question, a beach goer began to interfere and rearrange the set up, interrupting the romantic moment. In the video posted to TikTok, Zenicca’s partner got down on one knee and began to recite a speech, as the unnamed woman walked into shot. <div><iframe title="tiktok embed" src="https://cdn.embedly.com/widgets/media.html?src=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.tiktok.com%2Fembed%2Fv2%2F7269928964536192298&display_name=tiktok&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.tiktok.com%2F%40warngwarng%2Fvideo%2F7269928964536192298&image=https%3A%2F%2Fp16-sign.tiktokcdn-us.com%2Fobj%2Ftos-useast5-p-0068-tx%2F80e87476646048bca323b002688ff427_1692662253%3Fx-expires%3D1692910800%26x-signature%3D2CX7o9uY0RsEB7creGyXnWP8mas%253D&key=5b465a7e134d4f09b4e6901220de11f0&type=text%2Fhtml&schema=tiktok" width="340" height="700" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe></div> She then moves the proposal sign before walking over to the couple to get a look at the ring, before Zenicca even got a chance to wear it. “How to quickly ruin a proposal,” Zenicca wrote on TikTok. “Please be mindful of other people's once in a lifetime event! You never know you're already ruining it,” she wrote. The video has racked up tens of thousands of views, with many people being outraged on Zenicca’s behalf. “You could excuse the first few seconds w good intentions but the rest I feel like we’re just really bad manners and not having any self awareness,” commented one person. “This made me physically ill. I'm so sorry omg,” added another. “Aw I could tell she had good intentions but was ignorant in the moment that she was slightly ruining something y’all would cherish forever,” commented a third. “Just tell her it’s a personal moment. Sometimes people don’t understand boundaries.” Image credits: TikTok

Relationships

Paw-sitively hilarious finalists of the Comedy Pet Photography Awards 2023 revealed

The annual Comedy Pet Photography awards have announced their finalists for the competition, proving you can always rely on your furry friends to put a smile on your face. The 25 finalists have snapped their pets in their silliest moments, with the paw-sitively hilarious photos making instant classics. The finalists for the 2023 competition captured a photo-bombing dog, a lazy cat, unlikely friends, a sneak attack, a mishap at the beach and many other funny predicaments they found their furry friends in. The annual competition began several years ago, when professional photographers Tom Sullam and Paul Joynson-Hicks, who already ran the Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards, wanted to branch out and bring awareness to the joy pets bring to people's lives. Their website shares that their mission is to "promote positive awareness of animal welfare issues and celebrate the incredible and hugely valuable contribution that pets can and do have on our lives." "Through the wonders of photography, we want to share the hilarious expressions, antics and naughty capers that your joyous pets get up to and share the love and laughter with the world!" Fans of the funny furry friends can <a href="https://www.comedypetphoto.com/peoples-choice-award/vote-peoples-choice-award.php" target="_blank" rel="noopener">vote</a> on their favourite pic to determine the winner of the People's Choice Award for the 2023 competition. All image credits: Comedy Pet Photography Awards

Family & Pets

10 romantic lines from literature

It’s time to get sentimental with these lines about love from literature’s greatest authors. 1. “You pierce my soul. I am half agony, half hope. Tell me not that I am too late, that such precious feelings are gone for ever. I offer myself to you again with a heart even more your own than when you almost broke it, eight years and a half ago. Dare not say that man forgets sooner than woman, that his love has an earlier death. I have loved none but you.” – Persuasion by Jane Austen 2. “To love or have loved, that is enough. Ask nothing further. There is no other pearl to be found in the dark folds of life.” – Les Misérables by Victor Hugo 3. “Whatever the souls are made of, his and mine are same.” – Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte 4. “You and I, it’s as though we have been taught to kiss in heaven and sent down to earth together, to see if we know what we were taught.” – Doctor Zhivago by Boris Pasternak 5. “When you fall in love, it is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake, and then it subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots are to become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the desire to mate every second of the day. It is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every part of your body. No ... don't blush. I am telling you some truths. For that is just being in love; which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over, when being in love has burned away. Doesn't sound very exciting, does it? But it is!" – Captain Corelli's Mandolin by Louis de Bernières 6. “I have waited for this opportunity for more than half a century, to repeat to you once again my vow of eternal fidelity and everlasting love.” – Love In The Time Of Cholera by Gabriel García Márquez 7. “He stepped down, trying not to look long at her, as if she were the sun, yet he saw her, like the sun, even without looking.” – Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy 8. "All this gladness in life, all honest pride in doing my work in the world, all this keen sense of being, I owe to her!" And it doubles the gladness, it makes the pride glow, it sharpens the sense of existence till I hardly know if it is pain or pleasure, to think that I owe it to one - nay, you must, you shall hear" - said he, stepping forwards with stern determination - "to one whom I love, as I do not believe man ever loved woman before." – North and South by Elizabeth Gaskell 9. “You know what I am going to say. I love you. What other men may mean when they use that expression, I cannot tell; what I mean is, that I am under the influence of some tremendous attraction which I have resisted in vain, and which overmasters me. You could draw me to fire, you could draw me to water, you could draw me to the gallows, you could draw me to any death, you could draw me to anything I have most avoided, you could draw me to any exposure and disgrace. This and the confusion of my thoughts, so that I am fit for nothing, is what I mean by your being the ruin of me. But if you would return a favourable answer to my offer of myself in marriage, you could draw me to any good - every good - with equal force.” – Our Mutual Friend by Charles Dickens 10. “It is better to love wisely, no doubt: but to love foolishly is better than not to be able to love at all.” – Vanity Fair by William Makepeace Thackeray Image credits: Getty Images

Books

Have you found ‘the one’? How mindsets about destiny affect our romantic relationships

If you listen to any number of love songs, dating “experts”, or plunge head first into a romance novel, you’re likely to think it’s in our destiny to find that special someone – your soul-mate. But how do you know if you’ve found “the one”? Will the birds sing? Will you see fireworks or a shooting star? And for those who are yet to find “the one”, should you keep searching, or is it a misguided quest? Research into the science of relationships spanning the last two decades shows maintaining a “<a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1207/S15327957PSPR0701_3">destiny</a>” mindset – that we are all <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1207/S15327957PSPR0701_3">meant to find that ideal person</a> who completes us in every way – can be problematic for our love lives. Destiny mindsets affect how we <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1997-38975-006">evaluate romantic partners</a>, as well as how we maintain <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/1475-6811.09401">lasting relationships</a>. For some, this mindset can even include a mental picture as to what that person should look like. <h2>What are the costs of a mindset?</h2> A destiny mindset may make a person less open to developing a relationship with someone who possesses many excellent qualities, but does not match an individual’s mental picture of “the one”. A person who holds a destiny mindset may be more likely to focus on the potential faults or inadequacies of another, for example, rather than centre on their good qualities. On the other hand, a person may not pursue a potential love interest in the hope that something better comes along that matches their vision of destiny. By maintaining a destiny mindset, they may reject real <a href="https://scholarship.richmond.edu/honors-theses/487/">opportunities at finding love</a>. For those in an existing relationship, maintaining a destiny mindset can be associated with relationship satisfaction, if the current relationship closely (if not perfectly) matches one’s idea. But if the relationship is not in line with one’s vision of destiny, or if the relationship is evaluated as no longer matching one’s destiny, <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0146167201277004">dissatisfaction can ensue</a>. Research suggests people who hold a destiny mindset don’t work as hard at their <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2012-32735-009">relationships</a> because they have a very fixed view of their partner and relationship. They tend to accept things the way they are – <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2006-04109-008">either a relationship is meant to be or it is not</a> – rather than putting in time and effort to make relationships things work and <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2012-32735-009">deal with relationship problems</a>. <h2>Is there a better alternative?</h2> In contrast to a destiny mindset, some people hold a “growth relationship” mindset. This includes beliefs and expectations that a partner and relationship has the capacity to develop and change over time, and that <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1207/S15327957PSPR0701_3">problems or challenges can be overcome</a>. Research to date suggests a growth mindset is associated with more effective ways of coping with relationship challenges and using more <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2012-32735-009">problem-solving to deal with relationship difficulties</a>. People with a growth mindset experience various positives such as greater <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1997-38975-006">relationship</a> and <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/fulltext/2016-52940-001.html">sexual satisfaction</a> and have a better, more constructive way of handling <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2012-32735-009">conflict</a>. A growth mindset has also been found to reduce the risk of <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/1475-6811.09401">a relationship ending</a>. <h2>Can you have both?</h2> Some people recount meeting their partner and knowing they were “the one”. But when describing how their relationship has progressed over time, it’s clear they put time and effort into it and work on problems when they arise. These people may hold beliefs about destiny, but overall, hold more of a growth mindset about their relationship. These couples often acknowledge their partner and relationship has changed, for example, and often note that they’ve helped each other develop and grow over time. So if you work hard at your relationship, and you and your partner help one another develop and grow, you may get to know each other so well that you feel as if you share one soul. Maybe that’s what is meant by a true soul-mate. Image credit: Shutterstock <a href="https://theconversation.com/have-you-found-the-one-how-mindsets-about-destiny-affect-our-romantic-relationships-117177" target="_blank" rel="noopener">This article originally appeared on Reader's Digest.</a>

Relationships

Hilarious winners of the worldwide 2022 Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

The winners of the 2022 Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards have been announced, with some hilarious photos capturing astounding moments of the most adorable animals. An image of a three-month-old lion cub falling out of a tree has been named the overall winner of this year's competition, with Jennifer Hadley in the Serengeti, Tanzania, capturing the moment late one afternoon. "It didn't even occur to me that he would make a go of getting down by himself in the most un-cat like fashion. I mean, how often do cats fall out of trees?" Hadley said in a press release. "No one expected this to happen and of course we were concerned for his safety but happily as cats do, he righted himself just in time and landed on all fours and ran off with his siblings. A happy ending for a hapless kitty who didn't quite know how to get down from a tree." Hadley also won the People's Choice Award for her photo of a dismissive penguin seemingly snubbing his friend, which was titled Talk to the Fin. All image credits: Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards 2022

International Travel

10 best couples cruises for a romantic holiday at sea

What could be more romantic than spending a week at sea on a gorgeous ship with your honey, taking in spectacular views while indulging in over-the-top spa treatments and decadent, all-you-can-eat food? On the best cruises for couples, you get to experience so many exciting new sights, sounds and tastes together, you’re likely to fall in love with each other all over again. In fact, cruising is so romantic that thousands of couples actually get married, honeymoon and renew their vows onboard ships annually. here are romantic short cruises, all-inclusive cruises, adults-only cruises and even cruises that sail around the world. So, with all the great options out there, how do you choose the best cruise for the two of you? We’ve come up with a list of the best cruises for every type of traveller – times two! – to ensure you have fun together and don’t end up having to look for singles cruises instead! <h3>Best overall cruise – Viking Cruises</h3> Which company offers the best cruises for couples? Thanks to its small ships, impeccable service and adults-only policy, Viking earns that title, offering amazing cruises for lovebirds of all ages. You’ll feel like you’re at one of the best adults-only, all-inclusive resorts – except that you’ll have stunning views at sea. Every stateroom features its own private veranda, perfect for cosying up and watching the world go by, but don’t miss afternoon tea in the lovely Wintergarden. Whether you’re heading to Hawaii or the Mediterranean, a shore excursion in every port is also included in your fare, and after each one, you’ll want to relax in your robes in the spa’s Scandinavian-inspired thermal suite and talk about everything you experienced. In addition to award-winning ocean cruises, Viking is renowned for its river cruises and recently introduced expedition ships. Now, well-travelled couples can fulfil their bucket list trip to Antarctica knowing their favourite cruise line – like their partner – has their back. <div class="slide-image" style="box-sizing: border-box; border: 0px; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif, Arial; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; color: #444444; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial;"> </div> <h3>Best megaship cruise – Celebrity Cruises</h3> Although Celebrity ships hold thousands of guests, they’re so thoughtfully designed with cosy nooks and corners that they have a surprisingly intimate feel, which is why they may end up being your favourite cruises. That’s especially true for the Edge series ships, the newest in the fleet, which include the recently launched Beyond, a wonder in and of itself. Beyond fully lives up to its name, especially if you upgrade to the Retreat, an exclusive ship within a ship that will make you feel like, well, a celebrity. It includes a beautiful, roomy suite with your own veranda and also grants you access to a private sundeck, lounge and restaurant conducive to more intimate conversations. For the perfect date night, be sure to make a dinner reservation at Le Voyage, the first restaurant at sea from Michelin-starred chef Daniel Boulud, before heading off to a Broadway-quality show. No worries if you’re not on Beyond. Every Celebrity ship is filled with fantastic dining options, and on Edge series ships, you can enjoy dinner alfresco on the Magic Carpet, so seriously, what are you waiting for? <div class="slide-image" style="box-sizing: border-box; border: 0px; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif, Arial; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; color: #444444; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial;"> </div> <h3>Best cruise for getting married or renewing your vows – Princess Cruises</h3> Nicknamed “The Love Boat” in honour of the iconic TV show that was filmed on one of its ships, Princess is all about amore, and it just may be the most romantic cruise line. Embracing that legacy of love, it offers personalised wedding packages for couples who want to tie the knot at sea and recently set a Guinness World Record for the largest multi-location vow renewal. A dating reality show, The Real Love Boat, was also filmed aboard the Regal Princess and debuts in late 2022. But even if you’re not thinking about marriage yet or you’ve been married for years, you’ll want to cuddle under a blanket together to watch Movies Under the Stars or book an Ultimate Balcony Dining experience for a private champagne breakfast for two. Whatever you choose to do, love is in the air! <div class="slide-image" style="box-sizing: border-box; border: 0px; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif, Arial; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; color: #444444; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial;"> </div> <h3>Best traditional cruise – Cunard Line</h3> With ships named after Queen Mary, Queen Elizabeth and Queen Victoria, it’s no wonder couples get the royal treatment on Cunard. The 180-year-old cruise line’s rich history is evident throughout each Art Deco-influenced ship, and there’s a touch of glamour that celebrates the Golden Age of cruising and will inspire you to celebrate each other. Some good cruise advice? Opt for a magical transatlantic cruise to stay on the ship 24/7 and take advantage of everything from enriching lectures to lazy days in the spa’s thermal suite. Pack your formalwear for the Gala Evening that’s a highlight of each cruise, and spend the night dancing cheek to cheek. <div class="slide-image" style="box-sizing: border-box; border: 0px; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif, Arial; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; color: #444444; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial;"> </div> <h3>Best luxury cruise – Seabourn Cruises</h3> With an oceanfront view from every room and all-inclusive fare, Seabourn is worth the splurge for a romantic getaway. Your Personal Suite Steward will attend to your every need, even drawing a Pure Pampering bath for two. You’ll also dine in style, choosing between award-winning venues serving everything from steak and sushi to tableside preparations of caesar salad and ice cream sundaes. In each port, Seabourn categorises its shore excursions into collections, so you can experience a destination the way the two of you want to, whether you’re more into culture, wellness or adventure. The only issue is that you may never want to leave the ship. <div class="slide-image" style="box-sizing: border-box; border: 0px; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif, Arial; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; color: #444444; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial;"> </div> <h3>Best midsize cruise – Holland America Line</h3> Many couples prefer midsize cruises because they offer the intimacy of a small ship with more activities. Holland America is a great choice, featuring lovely spaces like Silk Den Lounge and the Pinnacle Bar, where you can while away a couple of hours enjoying each other’s company with a cool drink in hand. Enjoy live entertainment at B.B. King’s Blues Club, Lincoln Center Stage and Billboard Onboard, and take part in Port to Table food and wine tastings and cooking demonstrations. All these experiences will enrich your cruise and your memories together. FYI, despite its name, Holland offers a wealth of itineraries for couples cruises, covering destinations from Alaska to Zanzibar. <div class="slide-image" style="box-sizing: border-box; border: 0px; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif, Arial; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; color: #444444; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial;"> </div> <h3>Best cruise for younger couples – Virgin Voyages</h3> Richard Branson’s adults-only cruise line is young and hip. An oasis on the ocean, Virgin Voyages are the best cruises for millennial couples, whether you’re heading to the Greek Islands or the Caribbean ones. Every night can be date night, with more than 20 all-included eateries featuring everything from Korean BBQ to veggie-forward dining. Don’t worry – you can work off the calories in a wide variety of unlimited fitness classes, whether you prefer the intensity of indoor cycling or the zen of yoga. Choose the soundtrack to your cruise at Voyage Vinyl, an onboard record store, where you’re likely to find your song. And commemorate your romantic vacation by getting matching tattoos at Squid Ink, the first tattoo shop at sea. Have cruises recovered from COVID? We’d say yes! <div class="slide-image" style="box-sizing: border-box; border: 0px; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif, Arial; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; color: #444444; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial;"> </div> <h3>Best cruise for older couples – Silversea Cruises</h3> You won’t find lots of partiers on a Silversea cruise, but you will find lots of happy couples enjoying the ships’ understated luxury … and each other. It’s impossible not to feel special when you have your own suite with your own personal butler tending to your every need. (And FYI, all Silversea accommodations are suites.) Full dinners can even be served, course by course, in your cabin, white tablecloth and all. And because the all-inclusive pricing features wine, champagne and top-shelf spirits, you’ll find yourselves raising a glass – or two or three – to your love and your wise decision to book this couples cruise. <div class="slide-image" style="box-sizing: border-box; border: 0px; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif, Arial; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; color: #444444; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial;"> </div> <h3>Best cruise for active couples – Royal Caribbean International</h3> Royal Caribbean has always been known for its multitude of options, which have expanded even further with its launch of Wonder of the Seas, the world’s largest cruise ship. It’s like a city in itself, boasting eight unique “neighbourhoods,” including one exclusively for Royal Suite Class guests. There is so much for couples to do throughout the ship’s 18 decks, from walking through the plant-filled Central Park, riding the zip line and trying the FlowRider surf simulator to sipping cocktails at the cantilevered Vue Bar. On many of Royal Caribbean’s other ships, including Harmony of the Seas, you can opt for ice skating and dance lessons. <div class="slide-image" style="box-sizing: border-box; border: 0px; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif, Arial; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; color: #444444; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial;"> </div> <h3>Best budget cruise for couples – Carnival Cruise Lines</h3> Because Carnival has a reputation as a party boat, people often ask, “Is Carnival good for couples?” The answer is yes, and the truth is, with the right partner, any cruise ship can be romantic. Carnival also happens to be fun and value-priced, which comes in handy if you didn’t book a cruise when they’re the cheapest (often, that’s in the off-season, like right after the holidays). Carnival gives you the opportunity to channel your inner child and scream your way down the waterslides, laugh your head off at the R-rated comedy club sets and chill in the Serenity Adult-Only Retreat – all on the same cruise. And, as the saying goes, the couple that plays together stays together. This article originally appeared on <a href="https://www.readersdigest.com.au/travel/10-best-couples-cruises-for-a-romantic-holiday-at-sea" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Reader's Digest</a>. Image: Getty <div class="slide-image" style="box-sizing: border-box; border: 0px; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif, Arial; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 400; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; color: #444444; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-color: initial;"> </div>

Cruising

How asexuals navigate romantic relationships

<a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/00224490409552235" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Though an estimated 1% of people identify as asexual</a> – a sexual orientation most commonly defined as lacking sexual attraction – asexual people remain relatively invisible and are rarely researched. For these reasons, they’re frequently subjected to <a href="https://doi.org/10.1080/19419899.2013.774162" target="_blank" rel="noopener">discrimination and stereotyping</a>. For example, it’s often assumed that all people who are asexual are also “aromantic” – that they aren’t interested in being in romantic relationships or aren’t capable of doing so. However, that couldn’t be further from the truth. Asexuality exists on a spectrum, and there is a wide range in how the members of this group <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/1467-954X.12362" target="_blank" rel="noopener">experience sexuality and romance</a>. <a href="https://www.doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2022.912978" target="_blank" rel="noopener">In a recently published study</a> that I conducted with several Michigan State faculty members and other research associates, we surveyed people on the asexual spectrum who were currently in romantic relationships. We wanted to learn more about how asexuals experience romantic relationships and bring attention to their experiences – many of which, it turns out, aren’t all that different from those of people who aren’t on the asexual spectrum. <h2>The invisible sexuality</h2> Outside of <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/scientific-contributions/Alexandra-Brozowski-2230892618" target="_blank" rel="noopener">my work as a psychology researcher</a>, I am a member of the asexual community. Specifically, I am a heteroromantic <a href="https://demisexuality.org/articles/what-is-gray-asexuality/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">gray-asexual</a>: I am someone who feels romantic attraction to people of other sexes or genders, but experiences fluctuating or limited sexual attractions. Yet in existing research, I found few examples of people like me. Most studies seem to focus on people who are completely asexual, not in the gray area. In popular media, asexuals rarely even appear at all. <a href="https://www.themiamihurricane.com/2019/10/30/on-asexuality-the-big-bang-theory-and-representation/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">When they do</a>, they’re often portrayed as weird, robotic and incapable of love. In mainstream culture, there’s also an element of denialism, with many people believing that asexuality is impossible – that those who identify as asexual must have something wrong with them, such as hormonal issues. Perhaps they simply “<a href="https://medium.com/@acegirl/being-asexual-does-not-mean-we-havent-found-the-right-person-yet-459eb3938312" target="_blank" rel="noopener">haven’t found the right person</a>” or need to “try harder.” So this study was born out of my experiences as a person on the asexual spectrum, which is why it was so important for me to address all the different asexuals out there and give a voice to my own community. Many asexual people choose to be in relationships; they just may go about the process differently. Some might participate in <a href="https://www.brook.org.uk/your-life/non-monogamous-relationships/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">non-monogamous relationships</a>. Others might be forced to disclose their identities and preferences in different ways, wondering when – if ever – they should open up about it to potential partners, fearing that the reactions could be less than positive and lead to relationship difficulties. However, many asexuals relate to the <a href="https://www.gsrc.princeton.edu/split-attraction#:%7E:text=According%20to%20the%20split%20attraction,the%20same%20for%20some%20people." target="_blank" rel="noopener">Split Attraction Model</a>, which is a theory that shows how romantic and sexual attraction are two distinct experiences, and therefore, one can experience sex without love and love without sex. With this in mind, it is possible for asexuals to identify with a romantic orientation and pursue romantic relationships, since these are different experiences. <h2>Relationships centered on romance</h2> For our study, we looked exactly at this split and surveyed 485 people who self-identified as being on the asexual spectrum and were currently in a romantic relationship. The participants identified as heteroromantic, biromantic, homoromantic, panromantic and more, showing significant diversity among the romantic interests of this group. We then asked them about their relationship satisfaction, their level of investment in the relationship and how they viewed the quality of alternatives to their relationship. Additionally, we explored their <a href="https://www.attachmentproject.com/blog/four-attachment-styles/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">attachment orientation</a>. This is defined as the way in which people approach their close relationships. It’s usually formed in childhood and is a pattern that continues into adulthood. People tend to either exhibit an “anxious attachment style,” which is often characterized by feeling worried about abandonment and being anxious about losing the relationship; an “avoidant attachment style,” which means someone may push people away or fear emotional intimacy; or a “secure attachment style,” which is when people feel secure in their emotions and can maintain long-lasting relationships. Ultimately, our results were generally consistent with <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/1475-6811.00035" target="_blank" rel="noopener">previous work</a> on relationships in all of their forms. As with those relationships, we found that asexual people who were more satisfied and more invested were more committed in their relationships. When they weren’t pining for other people or didn’t see being alone as a better alternative, their relationships tended to flourish. Attachment orientation patterns were also generally consistent with past research on other sexuality groups. Much like <a href="https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/j.1475-6811.2012.01423.x" target="_blank" rel="noopener">work done</a> on other relationships, avoidant asexual individuals were also less committed, satisfied and invested in their relationships, as one would expect. However, there were also some inconsistencies with past research. For example, among asexual people, an anxious attachment style actually correlated to higher commitment and satisfaction. The opposite tends to occur in other types of <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4939067/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">relationships.</a> Nonetheless, I hope this research will help normalize the idea that asexuals can thrive in romantic relationships. It turns out that asexuals can experience romantic love as much as other sexual orientations do: with the same opportunities for joy and growth, the same challenges of navigating conflict and compromise, and the same possibility of a lifelong commitment. This article originally appeared on <a href="https://theconversation.com/how-asexuals-navigate-romantic-relationships-192685" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Conversation</a>. Image: Shutterstock

Relationships

10 best couples cruises for a romantic holiday at sea

The best cruises for couples you’ll want to book now What could be more romantic than spending a week at sea on a gorgeous ship with your honey, taking in spectacular views while indulging in over-the-top spa treatments and decadent, all-you-can-eat food? On the best cruises for couples, you get to experience so many exciting new sights, sounds and tastes together, you’re likely to fall in love with each other all over again. In fact, cruising is so romantic that thousands of couples actually get married, honeymoon and renew their vows onboard ships annually. There are romantic short cruises, all-inclusive cruises, adults-only cruises and even cruises that sail around the world. So, with all the great options out there, how do you choose the best cruise for the two of you? We’ve come up with a list of the best cruises for every type of traveller – times two! – to ensure you have fun together and don’t end up having to look for singles cruises instead! Best overall cruise – Viking Cruises Which company offers the best cruises for couples? Thanks to its small ships, impeccable service and adults-only policy, Viking earns that title, offering amazing cruises for lovebirds of all ages. You’ll feel like you’re at one of the best adults-only, all-inclusive resorts – except that you’ll have stunning views at sea. Every stateroom features its own private veranda, perfect for cosying up and watching the world go by, but don’t miss afternoon tea in the lovely Wintergarden. Whether you’re heading to Hawaii or the Mediterranean, a shore excursion in every port is also included in your fare, and after each one, you’ll want to relax in your robes in the spa’s Scandinavian-inspired thermal suite and talk about everything you experienced. In addition to award-winning ocean cruises, Viking is renowned for its river cruises and recently introduced expedition ships. Now, well-travelled couples can fulfil their bucket list trip to Antarctica knowing their favourite cruise line – like their partner – has their back. Best megaship cruise – Celebrity Cruises Although Celebrity ships hold thousands of guests, they’re so thoughtfully designed with cosy nooks and corners that they have a surprisingly intimate feel, which is why they may end up being your favourite cruises. That’s especially true for the Edge series ships, the newest in the fleet, which include the recently launched Beyond, a wonder in and of itself. Beyond fully lives up to its name, especially if you upgrade to the Retreat, an exclusive ship within a ship that will make you feel like, well, a celebrity. It includes a beautiful, roomy suite with your own veranda and also grants you access to a private sundeck, lounge and restaurant conducive to more intimate conversations. For the perfect date night, be sure to make a dinner reservation at Le Voyage, the first restaurant at sea from Michelin-starred chef Daniel Boulud, before heading off to a Broadway-quality show. No worries if you’re not on Beyond. Every Celebrity ship is filled with fantastic dining options, and on Edge series ships, you can enjoy dinner alfresco on the Magic Carpet, so seriously, what are you waiting for? Best cruise for getting married or renewing your vows – Princess Cruises Nicknamed “The Love Boat” in honour of the iconic TV show that was filmed on one of its ships, Princess is all about amore, and it just may be the most romantic cruise line. Embracing that legacy of love, it offers personalised wedding packages for couples who want to tie the knot at sea and recently set a Guinness World Record for the largest multi-location vow renewal. A dating reality show, The Real Love Boat, was also filmed aboard the Regal Princess and debuts in late 2022. But even if you’re not thinking about marriage yet or you’ve been married for years, you’ll want to cuddle under a blanket together to watch Movies Under the Stars or book an Ultimate Balcony Dining experience for a private champagne breakfast for two. Whatever you choose to do, love is in the air! Best traditional cruise – Cunard Line With ships named after Queen Mary, Queen Elizabeth and Queen Victoria, it’s no wonder couples get the royal treatment on Cunard. The 180-year-old cruise line’s rich history is evident throughout each Art Deco-influenced ship, and there’s a touch of glamour that celebrates the Golden Age of cruising and will inspire you to celebrate each other. Some good cruise advice? Opt for a magical transatlantic cruise to stay on the ship 24/7 and take advantage of everything from enriching lectures to lazy days in the spa’s thermal suite. Pack your formalwear for the Gala Evening that’s a highlight of each cruise, and spend the night dancing cheek to cheek. Best luxury cruise – Seabourn Cruises With an oceanfront view from every room and all-inclusive fare, Seabourn is worth the splurge for a romantic getaway. Your Personal Suite Steward will attend to your every need, even drawing a Pure Pampering bath for two. You’ll also dine in style, choosing between award-winning venues serving everything from steak and sushi to tableside preparations of caesar salad and ice cream sundaes. In each port, Seabourn categorises its shore excursions into collections, so you can experience a destination the way the two of you want to, whether you’re more into culture, wellness or adventure. The only issue is that you may never want to leave the ship. Best midsize cruise – Holland America Line Many couples prefer midsize cruises because they offer the intimacy of a small ship with more activities. Holland America is a great choice, featuring lovely spaces like Silk Den Lounge and the Pinnacle Bar, where you can while away a couple of hours enjoying each other’s company with a cool drink in hand. Enjoy live entertainment at B.B. King’s Blues Club, Lincoln Center Stage and Billboard Onboard, and take part in Port to Table food and wine tastings and cooking demonstrations. All these experiences will enrich your cruise and your memories together. FYI, despite its name, Holland offers a wealth of itineraries for couples cruises, covering destinations from Alaska to Zanzibar. Best cruise for younger couples – Virgin Voyages Richard Branson’s adults-only cruise line is young and hip. An oasis on the ocean, Virgin Voyages are the best cruises for millennial couples, whether you’re heading to the Greek Islands or the Caribbean ones. Every night can be date night, with more than 20 all-included eateries featuring everything from Korean BBQ to veggie-forward dining. Don’t worry – you can work off the calories in a wide variety of unlimited fitness classes, whether you prefer the intensity of indoor cycling or the zen of yoga. Choose the soundtrack to your cruise at Voyage Vinyl, an onboard record store, where you’re likely to find your song. And commemorate your romantic vacation by getting matching tattoos at Squid Ink, the first tattoo shop at sea. Have cruises recovered from COVID? We’d say yes! Best cruise for older couples – Silversea Cruises You won’t find lots of partiers on a Silversea cruise, but you will find lots of happy couples enjoying the ships’ understated luxury … and each other. It’s impossible not to feel special when you have your own suite with your own personal butler tending to your every need. (And FYI, all Silversea accommodations are suites.) Full dinners can even be served, course by course, in your cabin, white tablecloth and all. And because the all-inclusive pricing features wine, champagne and top-shelf spirits, you’ll find yourselves raising a glass – or two or three – to your love and your wise decision to book this couples cruise. Best cruise for active couples – Royal Caribbean International Royal Caribbean has always been known for its multitude of options, which have expanded even further with its launch of Wonder of the Seas, the world’s largest cruise ship. It’s like a city in itself, boasting eight unique “neighbourhoods,” including one exclusively for Royal Suite Class guests. There is so much for couples to do throughout the ship’s 18 decks, from walking through the plant-filled Central Park, riding the zip line and trying the FlowRider surf simulator to sipping cocktails at the cantilevered Vue Bar. On many of Royal Caribbean’s other ships, including Harmony of the Seas, you can opt for ice skating and dance lessons. Best budget cruise for couples – Carnival Cruise Lines Because Carnival has a reputation as a party boat, people often ask, “Is Carnival good for couples?” The answer is yes, and the truth is, with the right partner, any cruise ship can be romantic. Carnival also happens to be fun and value-priced, which comes in handy if you didn’t book a cruise when they’re the cheapest (often, that’s in the off-season, like right after the holidays). Carnival gives you the opportunity to channel your inner child and scream your way down the waterslides, laugh your head off at the R-rated comedy club sets and chill in the Serenity Adult-Only Retreat – all on the same cruise. And, as the saying goes, the couple that plays together stays together. Written by Lois Alter Mark. This article first appeared in <a href="https://www.readersdigest.co.nz/travel/10-best-couples-cruises-for-a-romantic-holiday-at-sea" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Reader’s Digest</a>. For more of what you love from the world’s best-loved magazine, <a href="http://readersdigest.innovations.co.nz/c/readersdigestemailsubscribe?utm_source=over60&utm_medium=articles&utm_campaign=RDSUB&keycode=WRA87V" target="_blank" rel="noopener">here’s our best subscription offer.</a> Image: Getty Images

Cruising

The best way to ask someone on a date

It seems Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan were onto something in their 1998 rom-com You’ve Got Mail. Sending an email is more romantic than calling when asking someone on a date, according to a study from Indiana University. The findings, published in the journal Computers in Human Behaviour, probably comes as no surprise considering just how technologically-reliant society has become. “Email’s been in the popular consciousness since the 1990s and if you look at the new generation of millennials … they’ve grown up with email and text messaging, so it may not be as unnatural a medium as we at first thought,” co-author Alan Dennis told Phys.org. Conventional wisdom has it that emails or texting are poor forms of communicating emotion, that a call is a more intimate way to connect, but this new research suggests otherwise. "When writing romantic emails, senders consciously or subconsciously added more positive content to their messages, perhaps to compensate for the medium's inability to convey vocal tone," the researchers wrote in their paper Researchers found when writing emails, people took more time to choose their words to ensure that it conveyed what they wanted it too. "The bottom line is that email is much better when you want to convey some information that you want someone to think about,” Dennis said. Dennis added their findings run counter to the commonly held belief that the further we get from face-to-face communication, the less genuine and effective it becomes. "There's a lot of theory that says email and other text communications don't really work very well," he said. "We should probably go back and reconsider a lot of the stereotypical assumptions that we hold about email and text messaging that may not hold true when we take a deeper look at how people react physiologically." While their research finds email may be the best choice to convey feelings, Dennis says there is clearly still a place for face-to-face meetings, phone calls, and other forms of direct communication. “If something isn’t really clear and you want to make sure that everyone has the same understanding of what something means, that’s best done in phone calls, face-to-face meetings or video conferencing,” he said. Image: Getty

Relationships

"Kids are quick": Romantic proposal takes wild turn

What was meant to be a beautiful proposal took a turn for the worst when the engagement ring plunged right through the jetty cracks and into the ocean below. Luke was down on one knee ready to propose to his pregnant girlfriend Stephanie on the Hervey Bay jetty while two-year-old Harper Jane watched on. But before they saw what was happening, Harper Jane quickly grabbed the engagement ring from the box and it slipped out of her hands. “Kids are quick, much quicker than you think - I didn’t actually realise she had grabbed it,” Luke said in a TikTok. Luke called out Harper Jane's name before immediately throwing off his thongs and taking his phone and wallet out of his pocket, ready to jump into the water. <div class="embed" style="font-size: 16px; box-sizing: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; outline: none !important;"><iframe class="embedly-embed" style="box-sizing: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border-width: 0px; border-style: initial; vertical-align: baseline; width: 619px; max-width: 100%; outline: none !important;" title="tiktok embed" src="https://cdn.embedly.com/widgets/media.html?src=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.tiktok.com%2Fembed%2Fv2%2F7141170167098117402&display_name=tiktok&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.tiktok.com%2F%40alarcon_sinverguenza%2Fvideo%2F7141170167098117402%3Fis_from_webapp%3D1%26sender_device%3Dpc%26web_id%3D7070374670839465473&key=59e3ae3acaa649a5a98672932445e203&type=text%2Fhtml&schema=tiktok" width="340" height="700" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe></div> <p dir="ltr" style="font-size: 16px; box-sizing: inherit; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; color: #323338; font-family: Roboto, Rubik, 'Noto Kufi Arabic', 'Noto Sans JP', sans-serif; background-color: #ffffff; outline: none !important;">Blindsided in the moment, his friend called out that he couldn’t jump because it was too shallow causing him to change his landing mid way through which left him with an earache. But Luke was on a mission to find the ring and was excited when he heard Stephanie’s dad call out to say that he could see it. “I can see it! Stop there, by your right hand,” he could be heard calling out. Thanks to the crystal clear waters of Hervey Bay, Luke was able to find the ring quickly and get back to shore. The ring eventually ended up on Stephanie’s finger, with the couple then revealing that Luke also wanted to ask Harper if he could be her step-dad. “I’m committing to them both so I felt like both of them should be present,” he said. “It’s just funny. Even if we had lost (the ring), there would have been humour in it - just sadness, too. “That will go down in the history books for us.” Images: TikTok

Relationships

These are the world’s most romantic destinations

Berlin While Berlin may not sound like the most romantic spot in the world, the city definitely has the charm to reel couples in. From the gorgeous Tiergarten (which includes an urban park, cafés, and a garden) to the grounds of Charlottenbeurg Palace, a twosome can easily get lost in their surroundings (and one another!) while on holiday here. Another popular draw for couples, particularly newly-married ones? The Weidendammer Bridge, where couples over the years have engraved their names and wedding date on a padlock, shackled it to the wrought iron railings, and then thrown the key into the Spree river, as a symbol of their everlasting love. Paris Including this iconic structure in this list is a no-brainer; Paris is known as the ‘City of Love’, after all! There is a never-ending parade of romantic things to do in France’s capital city: lunch at a romantic café in Montmartre, taking a stroll through the Luxembourg Gardens, visiting Le mur des je t’aime (The Wall of I Love You) on which those three magic words are written in over 250 different languages… But the most popular, and some may say the most cliché, is a visit to the Eiffel Tower. Not only for the breathtaking views of Paris that it offers from the third level observatory, but also to take the requisite couple’s kissing photo at its base. Ireland Amidst the lush greens and the moody skies, historic castles pepper Ireland’s landscape. While an inn atop a pub in Dublin may be the go-to accommodation, we suggest making the trek outside the city for a romantic and incomparable stay in one of the country’s many castles and manors. Many are hundreds of years old, but still successfully manage to marry the charms of the past with more modern amenities within. Some of the more well-known castles include Adare Manor in Limerick and Dromoland Castle in Newmarket-on-Fergus, but there are plenty to choose from and some may even offer free pick-up and drop-off in cities like Cork and Dublin. Big Sur, California Nearly 400km away from the hustle and bustle of Los Angeles lies Big Sur, a tranquil area where the Pacific Ocean and the Santa Lucia Mountains come together. It’s certainly a nature lover’s paradise, but even if you’re not fans of ‘roughing it’, you can’t help but be drawn into the awesome beauty of the region, particularly at night when it is covered by a blanket of stars. The many oceanside resorts don’t hurt either, if you’re simply a fan of viewing the mountains from the comfort of your room. There are various state parks that are worth the visit, as well as beaches, in particular the virtually untouched Pfeiffer Beach. Other points of interest include the historic Point Sur Lighthouse, and we also suggest a scenic drive along Highway 1 to take in the majesty of the Big Sur shoreline. Verona, Italy Thanks to the tragic tale of Romeo and Juliet from William Shakespeare’s most famous oeuvre, the city of Verona, Italy has become a pilgrimage site for couples eager to learn more about the fabled couple and the city they called home. Of course, the historic city’s structure and architecture alone make it a romantic site for couples, what with its many churches and piazzas, but it’s the Romeo and Juliet Guided Tour of Verona that exemplifies the city’s romantic spirit. It takes you to all of the locales mentioned in the play, from Romeo’s supposed house to Juliet’s tomb, ending the sojourn with a visit to Juliet’s balcony. You probably won’t be the first tourist to start uttering “O Romeo, Romeo! Wherefore art thou Romeo?” to your significant other while there. Amsterdam While Amsterdam may have a certain reputation for being a party city due to its lax marijuana laws and well-known red light district, it’s not just a city for the young and rowdy. If you’re looking for quaint and romantic stay, it can be the ideal choice. After all, it’s an idyllic city full of culture and history, and a quiet boat ride along the city’s famous (and historic) canals within the Canal Belt is a popular activity among couples. It’s particularly beautiful at night, as bridges light up alongside the canals, offering an altogether different way of seeing the city. Seychelles Islands It doesn’t get more secluded than a private island in the middle of the Indian Ocean. It’s any couple’s dream come true to get away for some private time, and with a blue sky above and an even more blue ocean below, the Seychelles are definitely a paradise come to life. There’s also no shortage of luxury resorts and hotels throughout the archipelago. Of course, it’s not all private rooms and beaches all to yourselves. For some human interaction, visit Victoria, Seychelles’ capital city, which is great for exploring on foot or by bike, and for taking in some gorgeous views of the local scenery. New York City New York City is known by many to be one of the most romantic cities in the world. Holding hands as you skate the rink at Rockefeller Plaza in winter, taking a stroll through Central Park in summer, or taking in the breathtaking skyline atop the Empire State Building… There is no shortage of places in Manhattan made for lovers. However, likely the perfect way to end a romantic date is a stroll across the iconic Brooklyn Bridge, particularly at nightfall, when the sun begins to set over the East River. Montreal Montreal brings some European flair to North America and also make for the perfect place for a romantic getaway. In particular, Mount Royal Park (designed by Frederick Law Olmsted, who is renowned for his work on Central Park) is the perfect playground for couples at any time of year, whether it’s lacing up your skates on Beaver Lake underneath the stars in winter, or enjoying a picnic alongside it in summer. But whatever time of year you visit, stopping at the Kondiaronk lookout is a must, for you’ll get lost in the view of Montreal before you. Bruges, Belgium When a city is commonly referred to as the ‘Venice of the North’, you can’t help but assume it has the potential to offer quite the romantic escape. The quaint and picturesque city of Bruges (in Belgium) is ideal for a day spent à deux. Aside from walking, a lovely way to take it all in is with a horse-drawn carriage tour of historic Bruges through the cobblestone streets and past the gorgeous canals, breathing in the sites, the people and the splendid architecture. Cap off your day by ducking into in a quiet pub for food and some wine, before taking a leisurely walk back to your hotel. Image credits: Getty Images This article originally appeared on <a href="https://www.readersdigest.co.nz/travel/these-are-the-worlds-most-romantic-destinations" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Reader's Digest</a>.

Travel Tips

The most romantic films ever made

The great romance films make you laugh when sparks fly, weep endlessly when tragedy strikes and swoon in delight when the boy and girl finally gets together. These films are the greatest romance films ever made guaranteed to make even the steeliest of hearts flutter. Why not re-live some of the classic moments that have defined romance with us? Casablanca (1942) "Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks into mine..." Humphrey Bogart’s face when he sees Ingrid Bergman walk into his joint says it all. Set in Morocco during WWII, the American expatriate encounters a former lover resulting in a heart-wrenching tale of love and sacrifice. The airport send-off scene had people talking for years debating whether Bogey did the right thing? An Affair to Remember (1957) “Oh, it's nobody's fault but my own! I was looking up... it was the nearest thing to heaven! You were there...” After Carey Grant and Deborah Kerr have an affair on a cruise they promise to meet atop the Empire State Building in six months. Fate has other plans and our hearts bawled in agony. Even if melodramatic at times, it’s the film that forever made the New York Empire State Building a symbol of love. West Side Story (1961) “I love him, I'm his, and everything he is I am too. I have a love, and it's all that I need. Right or wrong, and he needs me too.” From the beginning, we have deep sense of doom that street kid Richard Beymer and angelic Natalie Wood love will end in tragedy making the musical tale of two star-crossed lovers from rival gangs all the more poignant. When Harry Met Sally (1989) “I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” The rom-com genre at its best - the film follows the 12 year love-hate relationship between two friends, Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan, until they finally realise they love each other! This charming film may be the most realistic depiction of love. Love Actually (2003) “If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaky feeling you’ll find that love is all around…” There are so many different entwining tales of love to love here - from Colin Firth’s poorly pronounced proposal in Portuguese, the devastated widow Liam Neeson helping his lovesick stepson make a grand romantic gesture to Keira Knightley’s carol-singing placards. The Christmas theme just adds to the magical feeling – love really does make the world go round! Image: Getty

Movies

Touching video commemorates 70 years of marriage for couple in their 90s

The granddaughter of a couple in their 90s celebrating their 70-year wedding anniversary has shared a heartwarming video of them renewing their vows. The video of the elderly couple has captured the hearts of thousands of viewers, who watched their everlasting love story reach a bittersweet end. Patricia Hoefling, now 97, and her husband John Hoefling, from Carlisle, Pennsylvania, originally met in the 1940s and enjoyed a life of happiness together. John, who fought in Vietnam and Korea, and Patricia, a retired teacher, remained devoted to each other, so they celebrated their platinum anniversary with a vow renewal. The couple's granddaughter Shelby Hoefling, aged 31, from Virginia, shared her grandparent's heartfelt love story in a TikTok video that has gone viral. In the video Shelby explains that her 'Nanny' and 'GrandJack' first married on April 12th, 1947, and added that it would be their 75-year anniversary on the day she posted the video. Shelby shared footage from Patricia and John's 70-year wedding anniversary, which showed the couple renewing their vows. <blockquote class="tiktok-embed" style="max-width: 605px; min-width: 325px;" cite="https://www.tiktok.com/@shelbyhoefling/video/7085700046897057070" data-video-id="7085700046897057070"> <section><a title="@shelbyhoefling" href="https://www.tiktok.com/@shelbyhoefling" target="_blank" rel="noopener">@shelbyhoefling</a> Happy anniversary to my role models ❤️ <a title="fyp" href="https://www.tiktok.com/tag/fyp" target="_blank" rel="noopener">#fyp</a> <a title="lovestory" href="https://www.tiktok.com/tag/lovestory" target="_blank" rel="noopener">#lovestory</a> <a title="love" href="https://www.tiktok.com/tag/love" target="_blank" rel="noopener">#love</a> <a title="♬ original sound - Shelby Hoefling" href="https://www.tiktok.com/music/original-sound-7085700047467481902" target="_blank" rel="noopener">♬ original sound - Shelby Hoefling</a></section> </blockquote> When the couple arrived at the ceremony family and friends greeted them with smiles while bagpipes played in the background. Patricia said on stage “Here's to us, my love.” Shelby then revealed that her grandparents were married a total of 72 years before her grandfather John died at the age of 92. In the popular video Shelby wished her “role models” a happy 75-year anniversary and said her “Nanny doesn't go a day without loving him just as she vowed she would love him all the days of her life.'' Image: TikTok

Relationships

Prince Harry stars in comedy skit to promote "green" travel venture

Prince Harry has flexed his acting muscles as he stars in a comedy skit promoting his new "green" travel venture in New Zealand. The Duke of Sussex's eco-tourism venture Travalyst, which he founded in 2019, has launched a new initiative to rate holidayers on their environmental credentials. Travellers will also be able to choose their hotel based on how "green" the hotels and resorts are. In the hilarious ad promoting the new move, Prince Harry is seen jogging through a park, wearing a t-shirt that says "Girl Dad", in honour of his daughter Lilibet. The clip also features New Zealand actors Rhys Darby, Dave Fane and Rena Owen. In the video, Harry is accosted by Darby, who plays a "rating agent", who accuses him of littering on a beach in Auckland during his and Meghan's royal tour in October 2018. Darby explains that the country is trialling a system in which holiday destinations rate their visitors, giving Harry three stars out of five. He gives the royal a positive review for only using one out of 12 provided towels, buying honey from local vendors and turning off the tap when he brushed his teeth. When asked about his experience in the country, Harry says, "It was an incredible time. We had an amazing time in New Zealand. It's beautiful". The Duke of Sussex made the announcement on Māori Television's Te Ao with Moana on Monday night. Harry told viewers he had always felt a deep connection and respect towards the Maori people. "Tena Koutou katoa. I've been to Aotearoa a number of times throughout my life and I've always felt a deep connection and respect towards the Māori people who make me feel so welcome every time," Harry said. You can check out the video below. <iframe title="YouTube video player" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/V_sUwhZhTTY" width="560" height="315" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe> Image credits: Travalyst

Grace Tame makes waves at comedy show

Grace Tame has tried her hand at comedy to the delight of attendees at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. The 23-year-old Tasmanian appeared on a panel of comedians that touched on everything from climate change, housing affordability, and gender equality to Australia Day and misinformation and social media - all in a hilarious way, of course. <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> Last night’s <a href="https://twitter.com/ARationalFear?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@ARationalFear</a> live show in Melbourne was 👌 <a href="https://twitter.com/GabbiBolt?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@GabbiBolt</a>, <a href="https://twitter.com/aliterative?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@aliterative</a> hilarious, Dane Simpson & <a href="https://twitter.com/TamePunk?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@TamePunk</a> both nailed it, <a href="https://twitter.com/Andy_McClelland?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@Andy_McClelland</a> brought the bangers and <a href="https://twitter.com/vidyarrrr?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@vidyarrrr</a> was superb. Congrats <a href="https://twitter.com/danilic?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@danilic</a>, creative director of Meta. Download the pod when it comes out — Charlotte George 🌈 (@ccl_george) <a href="https://twitter.com/ccl_george/status/1513289276813119488?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 10, 2022</a></blockquote> She received the loudest applause as she was introduced by podcast host Dan Ilic, who pointed out how she was the master of the side-eye, referencing the famous photo of her and Prime Minister Scott Morrison at the Lodge. After monologues from Ilic, Gabbi Bolt, Alice Fraser and Dane Simpson, it was Ms Tame’s turn. She joked that she wasn’t going to get political, apologising to anyone who came to see her take aim at Mr Morrison - at least not directly. “Grace Tame referring to no particular politician as ‘A giant self-saucing joke pudding’,” one attendee tweeted about Ms Tame’s monologue. <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> Wow! <a href="https://twitter.com/ARationalFear?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@ARationalFear</a> was extraordinary... Thank you to the incredible team of<a href="https://twitter.com/vidyarrrr?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@vidyarrrr</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/Andy_McClelland?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@Andy_McClelland</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/LewisHobba?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@LewisHobba</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/aliterative?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@aliterative</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/GabbiBolt?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@GabbiBolt</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/thedanesimpson?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@thedanesimpson</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/LewisHobba?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@LewisHobba</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/zdaniel?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@zdaniel</a> And the incredible <a href="https://twitter.com/TamePunk?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@TamePunk</a> who brought the house down by comparing herself to an Airfryer. <a href="https://t.co/9QqNEEUPwU">pic.twitter.com/9QqNEEUPwU</a> — Dan Ilic (@danilic) <a href="https://twitter.com/danilic/status/1513254582864199680?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 10, 2022</a></blockquote> Ms Tame also told stories about My Little Pony, her favourite show to watch as a child, with veiled references to Mr Morrison and his government. One of the characters who “sharted in Old MacDonald’s farm” was a particularly clear reference to the longstanding rumour that Mr Morrison soiled himself at a McDonald’s in Engadine in 1997. Ms Tame didn’t just focus on the PM, going on to describe NSW One Nation leader Mark Latham as her “favourite comedian”. A joke about someone claiming Tasmania wasn’t a real place led to Tame saying it was okay because she lived ‘rent-free’ in Mr Latham’s head, along with domestic violence campaigner Rosie Batty (who he has publicly attacked), the 2004 election results (which saw him lost as Labor leader), and anyone who wasn’t a white man. <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> To be clear, this isn’t a “career move”. Advocacy is my first priority, always. It’s my life and purpose. I ummed and aahed over whether or not this was the right thing to do. Would it send a hopeful, empowering message to survivors? Or would it trivialise the cause? <a href="https://t.co/UDGm7iE0UG">pic.twitter.com/UDGm7iE0UG</a> — Grace Tame (@TamePunk) <a href="https://twitter.com/TamePunk/status/1512934253662654464?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 9, 2022</a></blockquote> Before Sunday’s gig, Ms Tame took to social media to explain her decision to take part in the comedy festival and clarify it wasn’t a ‘career move’, as many outlets reported. “Advocacy is my first priority always. It’s my life and purpose. I ummed and aahed over whether or not this was the right thing to do,” she wrote on Sunday morning. “There are risks in doing this, as there are with just about anything else in this mad life. “Things have been especially tough lately. But I reckon we could use a laugh. Either way, the joke’s on me. And if I fail, I’ll pick myself up and move. “You never know unless you try.” The show, which also included Lewis Hobba and independent candidate Goldstein Zoe Danila as a special guest, was recorded and will be released as an episode of Ilic’s podcast A Rational Fear. Image: Twitter

Beauty & Style

How to get PAID to get married

Couples hoping to tie the knot can now get paid almost $3000 to get married in Italy. The tourism board for one of Italy’s most popular regions Lazio – which includes Rome – has launched a fund giving people the chance to have their dream destination wedding there. Italy is a popular choice for couples looking to get married abroad, but the sector has been hit hard by the pandemic. The ‘In Lazio with Love’ scheme aims to bring weddings back to the country by enticing people with a free €2000 ($A2940) to spend on their Big Day. Nicola Zingaretti, president of Lazio, said the scheme was a way of revitalising the crippled wedding industry. “The scheme is needed to support a sector that has suffered badly from the economic crisis,” she said. “We have put the significant investment in place also with an eye on the tourism sector, and with the awareness and pride of being able to boast about every part of our region, with many locations among the most magical and fascinating in the world thanks to an unparalleled cultural heritage.” According to local media, 9000 couples have wed in Lazio since the start of the pandemic, compared to more than 15,000 in 2019. To bring weddings back to the region, almost $15 million has been set aside to help fund ceremonies, and both locals and tourists can apply. Valentina Corrado, Lazio’s tourism councillor, said the industry was ready to restart after a devastating two years. “Let’s relaunch a sector that has been on hold for a long time,” she said. “The whole wedding chain has suffered economically during the last two years.” To qualify for the grant, couples must get married anywhere in the Lazio region – which includes Rome, Viterbo, Tivoli, Latina and Bracciano. The money must be spent on Lazio-based wedding services, such as planners, venues, catering, and photographers. Applications can be <a href="https://www.regione.lazio.it/nellazioconamore">made here</a>, up to the end of January 2023, or until the fund runs out. Image: Getty

Travel Tips

30 years since The Addams Family hit the big screen, it is still the perfect blend of horror and comedy

The dark side of films has always had a strong relationship with the light side. Mixing comedy with horror often ensured a hit even in the early days of cinema –comedian Harold Lloyd was making such films <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D-CXQspZtMs">as early as the 1920s</a>. This combination of light hearted horror worked on the small screen as well. In the 1950s and 1960s, family sitcoms The Andy Griffith Show, My Three Sons, The Beverley Hillbillies and Leave it to Beaver were all hugely popular. But the 60s were also a time of the counter-culture revolution. Beatniks, hippies and a general anti-establishment youth culture progressively dismissed the conforming stereotypes of the wholesome family. From this a TV show, based on a long running New Yorker cartoon by Charles Addams, was launched: The Addams Family, based around a family who, while not outright monsters, definitely played on the dark side of life. The series itself only ran for two seasons and was dropped for poor ratings. But in the intervening years the show’s status grew. Children of the 1960s to the 1980s discovered the reruns and grew in love with the weirdness and offbeat humour. These children grew into adults who never lost interest in one of the strangest shows ever made. <iframe width="440" height="260" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/F3jnymeJof4?wmode=transparent&start=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen=""></iframe> In 1991 this nostalgia culminated with the release of The Addams Family Movie. Set around a family of oddballs whose pastimes include grave digging, cutting the heads off roses (because the thorns are far more precious) and stealing stop signs to revel in the sound of cars crashing, 30 years on the film has not lost any of its eccentric charm or quirky sensibilities. <h2>A plot for the madness</h2> The Addams Family Movie starts with the dilemma of attempting to contact Gomez’s brother, Fester (who has been in the afterlife for 25 years) and constantly failing. When someone claiming to be Fester turns up (the ever-versatile Christopher Lloyd), he is quickly embraced by the Addams’s as the long-lost Uncle. What they don’t know is the fake Fester is just there to find and steal their hidden riches. But this whole story is just a flimsy backdrop to all the crazy jokes, one-liners and sight-gags that each member of the family gets up to throughout the film. <iframe width="440" height="260" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/G388UMkJIBE?wmode=transparent&start=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen=""></iframe> The parents, Gomez and Morticia Addams are difficult to describe. Gomez is somewhere between a 1930s gangster and a wide eyed man-child who finds wonder at everything. But he is definitely a Renaissance man: just as skilled with a rapier sword as he is with a golf club, his dance moves are unparalleled. The late Raul Julia plays Gomez to perfection – arguably even better than John Astin who played the TV original. Angelica Huston steals the show as his wife Morticia. Wistful, sublime and ethereal, Huston mixes eroticism with playful innocence. She also gets many of the best lines. When Gomez asks Morticia if she is “Unhappy, darling?”, Morticia smoothly supines with a smile “Oh yes, yes completely” – as though that is the ultimate state of ecstasy. Gomez looks on her with constant adoring eyes, and cannot control his unbridled lust whenever Morticia speaks French. It is a love fuelled by constant romance. As Morticia says, “Gomez, last night you were unhinged. You were like some desperate, howling demon. You frightened me … Do it again!”. And when Gomez is racked by angst Morticia tells him “Don’t torture yourself, Gomez … that’s my job”. Every horror movie needs a creepy kid. And the Addams children, daughter Wednesday (Christina Ricci) and son Pugsley (Jimmy Workman), fit the bill nicely. Wednesday is like a mini version of her mother, but in a much more dour mood, with an intense interest in instruments of torture and execution. Pugsley is more playful, always following Wednesday’s lead – to the point of climbing into her electric chair to play her game of “Is there a God?”. <iframe width="440" height="260" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/5I0xFZ34uT4?wmode=transparent&start=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen=""></iframe> <h2>Ghoulish with heart</h2> Horror is supposed to make you frightened; comedy is supposed to make you laugh. They’re genre polar opposites. Then why do horror-comedies work? The Addams Family is so accessible to a wide audience because, while it plays with the dark side of life, it’s a horror film without any of the horror. The darkness is very low level, and it isn’t represented as being real. This is why children and people who don’t like real horror films love it. They can dip their toes in the horror genre but it is played for laughs, not scares. In a way, it has a been a gateway film for when children grow older and watch real horror films. The Addams Family introduces them to the dark world, but there’s nothing to fear. For now, it’s just fun. Overall, though, the one thing The Addams Family movie teaches audiences is regardless if you’re a witch, or a ghoul, or even just a hand, the most important thing in life is family.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important; text-shadow: none !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/172042/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/daryl-sparkes-828631">Daryl Sparkes</a>, Senior Lecturer (Media Studies and Production), <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-southern-queensland-1069">University of Southern Queensland</a> This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/30-years-since-the-addams-family-hit-the-big-screen-it-is-still-the-perfect-blend-of-horror-and-comedy-172042">original article</a>.

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30 years since The Addams Family hit the big screen, it is still the perfect blend of horror and comedy