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Prince Harry finally speaks out on "rift" with royal family

Prince Harry has finally opened up on his "rift" with the royal family for the first time, in an interview for the ITV documentary, Tabloids on Trial. The Duke of Sussex revealed that his decision to launch multiple legal battles against a string of tabloid newspapers was central to his rift with the royal family. He said that his determination to fight the publications ruined his relationship with them. “That’s certainly a central piece to it,” he said. “But, you know, that’s a hard question to answer because anything I say about my family results in a torrent of abuse from the press. “I’ve made it very clear that this is something that needs to be done. It would be nice if we, you know, did it as a family," he continued. “I believe that, again, from a service standpoint and when you are in a public role, that these are the things that we should be doing for the greater good. “But, you know, I’m doing this for my reasons. I think everything that’s played out has shown people what the truth of the matter is. “For me, the mission continues, but it has, it has, yes. It’s caused, yeah, as you say, part of a rift.” In December, London's High court ruled that he had been the victim of phone-hacking and other unlawful acts by journalists, with the knowledge of their editors at Mirror Group Newspapers. Harry said that the publications under MGN had targeted him for 15 years. He was awarded £140,600 ($267,400), and called the judge's ruling in his favour a "monumental victory". Image: ITV

Family & Pets

Why a cold beer is best – chemically speaking

A quiet moment in a bar has led two researchers to study how alcohol tastes at different temperatures. No, this is real science. <div class="copy"> “Two years ago, Xiaotao Yang and I were drinking beer together. He had just finished his doctorate degree thesis and asked me, ‘what should we do next?’” says Lei Jiang, lead author of a new study <a href="https://doi.org/10.1016/j.matt.2024.03.017" target="_blank" rel="noopener">published</a> in the materials science journal Matter. Yang and Jiang are material scientists at the Chinese Academy of Sciences. “At the time, I was a scientific committee member of one of the biggest Chinese alcoholic beverage companies, and I had the idea to ask the question ‘why does Chinese baijiu have a very particular concentration of alcohol, either 38%–42%, 52%–53%, or 68%–75%?’” Baijiu is a clear grain liquor from East Asia. It’s typically distilled from fermented sorghum (a type of grass), though it is also sometimes made from rice, wheat, barley or millet. “Then we decided, let’s try something, so I put a drop of beer on my hand to see the contact angle,” says Jiang. Contact angle is a measure of surface tension. For example, water has a low contact angle which is why it appears bead-like when placed on a surface. Solutions with high <a href="https://cosmosmagazine.com/health/body-and-mind/debunks-vices-alcohol/">alcohol</a> concentration, however, have a higher contact angle meaning they flatten and spread out. Contact angle also reveals how molecules within the droplet interact with each other and the surface below. After plotting the concentration of ethanol (alcohol) against contact angle, the scientists were surprised with what they found. There is no linear relationship between alcohol concentration and contact angle. Instead, increasing the amount of alcohol leads to a series of plateaus and sharp rises in the plot. Further experiments showed that this arises out of the formation of clusters of ethanol and water in the solutions. At low concentrations, ethanol forms pyramid-like structures around the water molecules. At high concentrations, the ethanol molecules arrange end-to-end in a chain. They also found that these structures change depending on temperature. For example, 38%–42% and 52%–53% ethanol solutions have distinct cluster structures at around room temperature, but this difference disappears at higher temperatures, like 40°C. “Although there is only 1% difference, the taste of baijiu at 51% and 52% is noticeably different; the taste of baijiu at 51% is similar to that of lower alcohol content, such as 38%–42%. So, in order to achieve the same taste at a lower alcohol content, the distribution of baijiu products ranges most within the 38%–42% and 52%–53% categories,” says Jiang. The researchers also found that there is an increase in ethanol chains at 5°C in 5% and 11% ethanol solutions – the concentration range of beer – giving it a more “ethanol-like” taste which is generally preferred. “At low temperature, the tetrahedral (pyramid-shaped) clusters become the low concentration amount, and this is why we drink cold beer,” says Jiang. The researchers say their research could help beverage companies produce the best flavour with the lowest alcohol concentration. Image credits: Shutterstock <div> </div> <img id="cosmos-post-tracker" style="opacity: 0; height: 1px!important; width: 1px!important; border: 0!important; position: absolute!important; z-index: -1!important;" src="https://syndication.cosmosmagazine.com/?id=303282&title=Why+a+cold+beer+is+best+%E2%80%93+chemically+speaking" width="1" height="1" loading="lazy" aria-label="Syndication Tracker" data-spai-target="src" data-spai-orig="" data-spai-exclude="nocdn" /></div> <div id="contributors"> <a href="https://cosmosmagazine.com/science/chemistry/beer-taste-temperature/">This article</a> was originally published on <a href="https://cosmosmagazine.com">Cosmos Magazine</a> and was written by <a href="https://cosmosmagazine.com/contributor/evrim-yazgin/">Evrim Yazgin</a>. </div>

Food & Wine

Princess Kate sensationally speaks out over photo fiasco

Kensington Palace's attempt to quell speculation about Kate Middleton's health has ignited a storm of controversy, raising concerns about the future Queen's well-being to feverish levels. The Princess of Wales, at 42, issued an unprecedented statement on Monday morning, UK time, taking responsibility for what was described as <a href="https://www.oversixty.co.nz/health/caring/princess-kate-s-post-surgery-pic-ignites-even-wilder-conspiracy-theories" target="_blank" rel="noopener">"editing" an official portrait </a> released on Sunday for Mother’s Day. This portrait, featuring Kate alongside her three children – Prince George, Princess Charlotte, and Prince Louis – was eagerly anticipated as it marked the first sighting of the Princess since her mysterious abdominal surgery in January and subsequent disappearance from the public eye. However, far from dispelling concerns, the photograph seemed to amplify existing suspicions about her health, with many pointing out apparent discrepancies and suggesting it had been manipulated. The situation escalated when four major photo agencies issued "kill notice" orders for the image, alleging it had been "manipulated at the source [palace]." In a rare move, Kate Middleton took to X (Twitter) to address the controversy directly, admitting to the editing mishap and expressing regret for any confusion caused by the altered image. "Like many amateur photographers, I do occasionally experiment with editing," she wrote. "I wanted to express my apologies for any confusion the family photograph we shared yesterday caused. I hope everyone celebrating had a very happy Mother's Day. C" Despite her efforts to diffuse the situation, the fallout continued to unravel. Royal watchers and fans reacted strongly to the events, with some accusing the palace of using Kate as a scapegoat and questioning the integrity of the institution itself. Omid Scobie, a UK author known for his association with Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, highlighted the palace's history of misinformation and suggested that regaining public trust would be an uphill battle. “It’s fair to say that most photos released by the offices of public figures have been retouched in some way, so *if* this was an isolated incident then it would just be an unfortunate error," Scobie wrote. "But with the Palace’s long history of lying, covering up, and even issuing statements on behalf of family members without their permission (cc: Prince Harry), it’s becoming increasingly difficult for the public to believe a word (and now photo) they share. Gaining that back at this point is an almost impossible task.” Piers Morgan strongly urged the palace to release the unedited version of the photo to quell speculation. Failure to do so, he warned, would only fuel further conspiracy theories. As the debate raged on social media, with Kate Middleton's name trending worldwide, users dissected the image, pointing out inconsistencies and suggesting alternative theories. The withdrawal of the photo by major news agencies, citing editorial issues, have only added fuel to the fire, further intensifying speculation. Amidst the controversy, Princess Kate's prolonged absence from the public eye following her hospitalisation in January has only heightened concerns. <a href="https://www.oversixty.co.nz/finance/legal/kate-middleton-spotted-for-the-first-time-since-surgery" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Her recent appearance</a>, photographed near Windsor Castle, marked her first public sighting in over two months, adding to the intrigue surrounding her health. As the debate continues, the fallout from this incident may have lasting implications for both Kate Middleton and the institution she represents. Image: Instagram

Family & Pets

“May her memory be a blessing”: Father of Hamas victim speaks out

The grieving father of a 23-year-old German-Israeli woman, Shani Louk, who was kidnapped from the Nova music festival by Hamas militants on October 7, has shared his devastation after it was confirmed that his daughter had been found dead. The Israeli Ministry of Foreign Affairs confirmed the discovery and identification of Shani Louk's body on Monday. Louk was attending the festival in southern Israel when Hamas breached the border between Gaza and Israel, leading to a series of tragic events. However, her father, Nissim Louk, remembers his daughter as someone who was enjoying herself "until the last moment". "Until about 6.45pm, Shani was still dancing, cheering, and going wild at the party and was surrounded by all her best friends — and they had fun all night," he told the Israeli news outlet, N12. He emphasised that she was killed instantly and didn't suffer. Just ten minutes earlier, she was still immersed in the festival's joy. “She was killed on the spot and not only did she not suffer, 10 minutes earlier she was still enjoying herself.” Mr Louk also criticised the government's response, calling it a failure. He claimed that the government ministries underestimated the situation, were unresponsive, and failed to take adequate measures. He pointed out the responsibility of then-Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu in the events and expressed his discontent with the government's handling of the situation. Shani Louk was kidnapped at the festival and subjected to torture and captivity by Hamas terrorists. The Israeli Ministry of Foreign Affairs stated that she "experienced unfathomable horrors", and expressed their condolences, saying, "May her memory be a blessing." The attack by Hamas militants on the festival was a horrifying event. They blocked off access to the festival site from both the north and the south before storming the area on foot. Videos from the site showed them encircling the crowds on three sides, leading to casualties and chaos. Shani's mother, Ricarda Louk, revealed that she last spoke to her daughter after hearing rockets and alarms sounding in southern Israel. She called to ensure her daughter's safety, and Shani informed her that she was at the festival with few places to hide. Her abduction occurred as she was trying to reach her car, with military personnel preventing people from leaving the scene. The tragedy at the Nova festival was immense, with more than 260 bodies found at the site by Israeli rescue service Zaka. However, based on CNN's analysis, the total death toll could be even higher. Additionally, a number of hostages were taken to Gaza during the attack, with the latest figures indicating that up to 239 hostages are believed to be held by Hamas in the enclave. In a glimmer of hope amidst the tragedy, a female Israeli soldier who had been kidnapped by Hamas on October 7 was released during ground operations in Gaza, as confirmed by the Israel Defence Forces. The soldier received medical attention, is in good health, and has been reunited with her family. Images: CNN / N12

Caring

Is it normal to forget words while speaking? And when can it spell a problem?

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/greig-de-zubicaray-1468234">Greig de Zubicaray</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/queensland-university-of-technology-847">Queensland University of Technology</a> We’ve all experienced that moment mid-sentence when we just can’t find the word we want to use, even though we’re certain we know it. Why does this universal problem among speakers happen? And when can word-finding difficulties indicate something serious? Everyone will experience an occasional word-finding difficulty, but if they happen very often with a broad range of words, names and numbers, this could be a sign of a neurological disorder. <h2>The steps involved in speaking</h2> Producing spoken words involves several <a href="https://doi.org/10.1093/oxfordhb/9780190672027.013.19">stages of processing</a>. These include: <ol> <li> identifying the intended meaning </li> <li> selecting the right word from the “mental lexicon” (a mental dictionary of the speaker’s vocabulary) </li> <li> retrieving its sound pattern (called its “form”) </li> <li> executing the movements of the speech organs for articulating it. </li> </ol> Word-finding difficulties can potentially arise at each of these stages of processing. When a healthy speaker can’t retrieve a word from their lexicon despite the feeling of knowing it, this is called a “tip-of-the-tongue” phenomenon by language scientists. Often, the frustrated speaker will try to give a bit of information about their intended word’s meaning, “you know, that thing you hit a nail with”, or its spelling, “it starts with an H!”. Tip-of-the-tongue states are relatively common and are a type of speech error that occurs primarily during retrieval of the sound pattern of a word (step three above). <h2>What can affect word finding?</h2> Word-finding difficulties occur at all ages but they do happen more often as we get older. In older adults, they can cause frustration and anxiety about the possibility of developing dementia. But they’re not always a cause for concern. One way researchers investigate word-finding difficulties is to ask people to keep a diary to record how often and in what context they occur. <a href="https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2015.01190/full">Diary studies</a> have shown that some word types, such as names of people and places, concrete nouns (things, such as “dog” or “building”) and abstract nouns (concepts, such as “beauty” or “truth”), are more likely to result in tip-of-the-tongue states compared with verbs and adjectives. Less frequently used words are also more likely to result in tip-of-the-tongue states. It’s thought this is because they have weaker connections between their meanings and their sound patterns than more frequently used words. Laboratory studies have also shown tip-of-the-tongue states are more likely to occur under <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/13825585.2019.1641177">socially stressful</a> conditions when speakers are told they are being evaluated, regardless of their age. Many people report having experienced tip-of-the-tongue problems during job interviews. <h2>When could it spell more serious issues?</h2> More frequent failures with a broader range of words, names and numbers are likely to indicate more serious issues. When this happens, language scientists use the terms “anomia” or “<a href="https://www.aphasia.com/aphasia-library/aphasia-types/anomic-aphasia/">anomic aphasia</a>” to describe the condition, which can be associated with brain damage due to stroke, tumours, head injury or dementia such as Alzheimer’s disease. Recently, the actor Bruce Willis’s family <a href="https://edition.cnn.com/2023/02/16/health/frontotemporal-dementia-definition-symptoms-wellness/index.html">revealed</a> he has been diagnosed with a degenerative disorder known as primary progressive aphasia, for which one of the earliest symptoms is word-finding difficulties rather than memory loss. Primary progressive aphasia is typically associated with frontotemporal or Alzheimer’s dementias, although it can be associated with other <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3637977/">pathologies</a>. Anomic aphasia can arise due to problems occurring at different stages of speech production. An assessment by a clinical neuropsychologist or speech pathologist can help clarify which processing stage is affected and how serious the problem might be. For example, if a person is unable to name a picture of a common object such as a hammer, a clinical neuropsychologist or speech pathologist will ask them to describe what the object is used for (the individual might then say “it’s something you hit things with” or “it’s a tool”). If they can’t, they will be asked to gesture or mime how it’s used. They might also be provided with a cue or prompt, such as the first letter (h) or syllable (ham). Most people with anomic aphasia benefit greatly from being prompted, indicating they are mostly experiencing problems with later stages of retrieving word forms and motor aspects of speech. But if they’re unable to describe or mime the object’s use, and cueing does not help, this is likely to indicate an actual loss of word knowledge or meaning. This is typically a sign of a more serious issue such as primary progressive aphasia. <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neuroimaging">Imaging studies</a> in healthy adults and people with anomic aphasia have shown different areas of the brain are responsible for their word-finding difficulties. In <a href="https://direct.mit.edu/jocn/article-abstract/35/1/111/113588/Neural-Correlates-of-Naturally-Occurring-Speech">healthy adults</a>, occasional failures to name a picture of a common object are linked with changes in activity in brain regions that control motor aspects of speech, suggesting a spontaneous problem with articulation rather than a loss of word knowledge. In anomia due to primary progressive aphasia, brain regions that process word meanings show a loss of nerve cells and connections or <a href="https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0148707">atrophy</a>. Although anomic aphasia is common after strokes to the left hemisphere of the brain, the associated word-finding difficulties do not appear to be distinguishable by <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0010945215003299">specific areas</a>. There are <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/02687030244000563">treatments</a> available for anomic aphasia. These will often involve speech pathologists training the individual on naming tasks using different kinds of cues or prompts to help retrieve words. The cues can be various meaningful features of objects and ideas, or sound features of words, or a combination of both. <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S002199241730014X">Smart tablet</a> and phone apps also show promise when used to complement therapy with home-based practice. The type of cue used for treatment is determined by the nature of the person’s impairment. Successful treatment is associated with changes in activity in <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0093934X14000054">brain regions</a> known to support speech production. Unfortunately, there is no effective treatment for primary progressive aphasia, although <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/13607863.2019.1617246">some studies</a> have suggested speech therapy can produce temporary benefits. If you’re concerned about your word-finding difficulties or those of a loved one, you can consult your GP for a referral to a clinical neuropsychologist or a speech pathologist. <img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/212852/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/greig-de-zubicaray-1468234">Greig de Zubicaray</a>, Professor of Neuropsychology, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/queensland-university-of-technology-847">Queensland University of Technology</a> Image credits: Getty Images This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/is-it-normal-to-forget-words-while-speaking-and-when-can-it-spell-a-problem-212852">original article</a>.

Mind

"It has been the hardest time": Ronan Keating speaks out after family tragedy

Ronan Keating has broken his silence for the first time since the sudden death of his brother. The Irish musician and former Boyzone member said it has been the "hardest time" dealing with the sudden loss, after his older brother Ciaran was killed in a car crash in his native Ireland in July. On Saturday, Ronan addressed the tragedy for the first time, revealing how he and his family are dealing with their grief. He wrote on Instagram, "Just wanted to say thank you for the love and respect you have shown my family over the last 5 weeks. It has been the hardest time for us all, and everyone is trying to manage a life now without our brother (very hard to even type that 💔)." "Thank you for all your messages of support and also respecting our privacy during this time." Along with the caption, Ronan shared a series of snaps from South Africa, where the family are holidaying to get away from their busy life and take time to reckon with the tragedy. "There is no more fitting a place to heal, than in South Africa surrounded by Mother Nature and great people and our little bundles of joy Cooper and Coco, have kept us going constantly. Thank you god." "Back to work for me in another part of the world I love now… it all seems rather difficult to make sense of but trying my best. " "Take care of each other and from Storm, myself and all my family, thank you." The post was flooded with comments of well wishes and condolences, while fans encouraged Ronan and his family to take as much time out as they needed to heal. Just days after the post, Ronan shared a sweet tribute to his wife Storm, as the couple celebrated their eight year wedding anniversary while on their family getaway. <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/reel/CwHDRkGpnbQ/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/reel/CwHDRkGpnbQ/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Ronan Keating (@rokeating)</a> </div> </blockquote> Along with a heartwarming video of some of their best moments together, Ronan wrote, "Thank you for the absolute unwavering honesty and love. Without you I would be somewhere very dark. Your love is my compass." "Eight years married but a lifetime together. The memories the laughs the babies the family. It’s you and me love. Happy anniversary." "In this lifetime and everyone one that the universe gives after that I will find you. No two spirits were more connected." Image credits: Instagram

Family & Pets

"My brother and I are safe and alive": Lil Tay speaks out

Rising to online stardom at the tender age of nine, rapper Lil Tay, the child prodigy, has defied widespread reports of her demise, as confirmed by her recent statement following a <a href="https://www.oversixty.co.nz/news/news/death-announced-of-child-star-and-her-brother-at-just-14" target="_blank" rel="noopener">death announcement that appeared on her official Instagram page</a>. Speaking to TMZ, the 14-year-old social media sensation expressed her relief, saying: "I want to make it clear that my brother and I are safe and alive, but I'm completely heartbroken, and struggling to even find the right words to say. "It's been a very traumatising 24 hours. All day yesterday I was bombarded with endless heartbreaking and tearful phone calls from loved ones – all while trying to sort out this mess." Those past 24 hours have certainly been harrowing for Lil Tay, having to deal with a barrage of anguished and tearful phone calls from concerned relatives. Lil Tay has come forward to explain that her Instagram account, which initially held 3.3 million followers and now exceeds 3.5 million, was subjected to a hack before the now-deleted misleading announcement was posted. "My Instagram account was compromised by a 3rd party and used to spread jarring misinformation and rumours regarding me, to the point that even my name was wrong. My legal name is Tay Tian, not 'Claire Hope'." Early on the morning of Thursday August 10, a message surfaced on the official Instagram account, proclaiming the "sudden and tragic" passing of the artist – the first post to surface since 2018. In the heartfelt message, it was conveyed, "Words fail to capture the insurmountable void and inexpressible anguish. This outcome took us by complete surprise, leaving us all in a state of disbelief." "We have no words to express the unbearable loss and indescribably pain. This outcome was entirely unexpected, and has left us all in shock." It was also claimed in the statement that Jason Tian, Lil Tay's 21-year-old brother, had also died. "Her bother's passing adds an even more unimaginable depth to our grief," the statement continued. "During this time of immense sorrow, we kindly ask for privacy as we grieve this overwhelming loss, as the circumstances surrounding [Lil Tay] and her brother's passing are still under investigation." "[Lil Tay] will forever remain in our hearts, her absence leaving an irreplaceable void that will be felt by all who knew and loved her." Following the announcement, Variety initially reported Lil Tay's management as confirming her demise. Nonetheless, Insider revealed that Lil Tay's father, Christopher Hope, refrained from commenting on the Instagram post and declined to address queries regarding her current state. During her brief yet impactful three-month presence in the social media landscape, Lil Tay found herself entangled in various controversies, most notably offering an apology after employing a racial slur in one of her videos. Yet, as swiftly as her rise to virtual stardom unfolded, Lil Tay faded from view. Lil Tay's ultimate Instagram post before the now-deleted death notice emerged on June 19, 2018. This post was a tribute to the late rapper XXXTentacion, who tragically lost his life at 20 years old the preceding day. Image: Instagram

News

Rescued sailor speaks after being adrift for months with his dog

Australian sailor Timothy Shaddock has spoken up about the three months he spent lost at sea with nothing but his dog Bella. The 54-year-old was rescued by a Mexican tuna boat in the Pacific Ocean after a helicopter spotted his incapacitated catamaran 1900 km from land. When he was found by the Maria Delia crew, which is part of the Grupomar fleet, Shaddock and his dog were in a “precarious” state after surviving three months without provisions and shelter. Shaddock, who was sailing from Mexico to French Polynesia lost contact because his boat’s electronic system was damaged during rough seas. When the helicopter first discovered him, they threw him a drink and flew away before returning with the tuna trawler to rescue him. This was his first contact with humans since early May. Despite the horrifying ordeal and the fear of not being able to survive an impending hurricane, the sailor remained positive and said that he enjoyed being out at sea. "I did enjoy being at sea. I enjoyed being out there," he told reporters during a news conference in Manzanillo, Mexico on Tuesday, after he safely made it back to land. "But when things get tough out there, you know, you have to survive. And then when you get saved, you feel like you want to live. So, I'm very grateful." Shaddock said that he passed the time by fixing things and tried to stay positive by going into the water to “just enjoy” it. The sailor survived on a diet of raw fish after the storm knocked out his electronics and ability to cook. “I did a lot of fishing,” Shaddock said. “There was a lot of tuna sushi.” The emaciated sailor who survived was immediately given food, water and medication upon being rescued. In one of the photos shared by the Grupomar, a thin and bearded Shaddock was pictured in the boat's cabin with a blood pressure cuff around his arm and a huge smile on his face despite the entire ordeal. In a few others, Bella was pictured lying on the deck and receiving pats for being the bravest pup. Shaddock expressed his gratitude for his loyal companion. “Bella found me in Mexico, she’s Mexican. She is the spirit of the middle of the country, and she wouldn’t let me go,” he said. “She’s amazing, that dog is something else. “I’m just grateful she’s alive. She’s a lot more brave than me.” He revealed that the hardest part of surviving was the fatigue, but this incident will not stop him from going into the ocean in the future. “I’ll always be in the water, I don’t know how far out in the ocean I’ll be,” he said. Images: ABC News/ 9news/ Facebook

Travel Trouble

With so many people speaking ‘their truth’, how do we know what the truth really is?

<a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/jeremy-wyatt-1429400">Jeremy Wyatt</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-waikato-781">University of Waikato</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/joseph-ulatowski-1439138">Joseph Ulatowski</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-waikato-781">University of Waikato</a> When Academy Awards boss Bill Kramer recently <a href="https://nz.news.yahoo.com/oscars-boss-bill-kramer-applauds-150147102.html">applauded comedian Chris Rock</a> for speaking “his truth” about being slapped by Will Smith at the 2022 Oscars ceremony, he used a turn of phrase that is fast becoming a part of everyday speech around the world. Take <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2021/mar/06/harry-meghan-oprah-interview">Oprah Winfrey’s interview</a> with Prince Harry and the Duchess of Sussex Meghan Markle, for example. Oprah asked, “How do you feel about the palace hearing you speak your truth today?” Or consider Samantha Imrie, a juror in the civil lawsuit over Gwyneth Paltrow’s role in a 2016 ski accident with Terry Sanderson. Asked about Sanderson’s testimony, <a href="https://www.nzherald.co.nz/entertainment/gwyneth-paltrow-utah-ski-collision-trial-juror-samantha-imrie-reveals-why-actress-won/AV5O32FOYZAXTD4DY6ECWUCCQY/">Imrie replied</a>, “He was telling his truth […] I do think he did not intend to tell a truth that wasn’t his truth.” But what does it mean for someone to speak “their truth”? Perhaps it’s time to reconsider how we use this expression, given it can be easily misinterpreted as endorsing a problematic view of what it takes for a claim to be true. <h2>Truth relativism</h2> On its face, speaking about “my truth” or “your truth” suggests that <a href="https://psyche.co/guides/how-to-think-about-truth-in-a-philosophically-informed-way">truth is relative</a> to an individual. Philosophers call this view “truth relativism”. It says that when someone makes a claim, that claim is made true or false by what they believe or how they feel, rather than by the way the world actually is. A problem with relativism is that it seems to leave reasoned debate without any clear goal. Suppose, for example, we are discussing whether the New Zealand government’s <a href="https://www.dia.govt.nz/Three-Waters-Reform-Programme">Three Waters Reform Programme</a> will “maintain and improve the water service infrastructure”. Presumably our goal is to determine whether it’s true that the reform will maintain and improve the water service infrastructure. However, if there is no truth to identify here – only “your truth” and “my truth” – then it isn’t clear why we should have this discussion at all. What’s the alternative to truth relativism, then? To reject relativism is to grant that at least some of our claims are true or false because the world – which exists independently of our minds, languages and cultures – is a particular way. For instance, because lemons are more acidic than milk chocolate, the claim that lemons are more acidic than milk chocolate is true, and the claim that milk chocolate is more acidic than lemons is false. Likewise, since <a href="https://theconversation.com/why-vaccine-opponents-think-they-know-more-than-medical-experts-99278">vaccines don’t cause autism</a>, the claim that vaccines cause autism is false, and the claim they don’t cause autism is true. <h2>Truth and respect</h2> You can stick with this straightforward view about truth and still recognise that everyone deserves to be heard and respected. As John Stuart Mill <a href="https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/mill/#LibeFreeSpee">pointed out in his book</a> On Liberty (1859), if we fail to consider a wide range of perspectives, even those views that may ultimately turn out to be false, it is more likely we will be unable to discover important truths about the world. This means that valuing truth should actually encourage you to engage with points of view that differ from yours. It’s also worth noting that, in some cases, people who claim to speak “their truth” may not actually be endorsing relativism. This might be said of the <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O3pJBurhbZM">announcement</a> by Meka Whaitiri that she intended to join Te Pāti Māori. Offering a heartfelt explanation of her reasons for the decision, she concluded by directly addressing her Ikaroa-Rāwhiti constituents: “I have spoken my truth.” But she also explained: "The point here, whanau, is Māori political activism. It’s part of being Māori. It comes from our whakapapa. And we as Māori have a responsibility to it. Not others — we. Today, I’m acknowledging that whakapapa. I’m acknowledging my responsibility to it, and it’s calling me home." This suggests that in speaking “her truth”, Whaitiri was in fact outlining her reasons for joining Te Pāti Māori. Her main objective was to underscore the significance of whakapapa, rather than to defend truth relativism. Whaitiri’s reasons are certainly strong ones, though framing them in terms of “my truth” could lead others to misinterpret them. Moreover, if Pākehā responded to Whaitiri by saying “this is her truth, not our truth”, then we would be back again with the problem of relativism. We need to value people’s unique identities, experiences and reasons for doing things, and we also need to value truth. Truth is a central goal of reasoned debate, and that’s something we will certainly need when addressing the many pressing issues currently facing Aotearoa New Zealand and the world.<img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/205388/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /> <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/jeremy-wyatt-1429400">Jeremy Wyatt</a>, Senior Lecturer in Philosophy, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-waikato-781">University of Waikato</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/joseph-ulatowski-1439138">Joseph Ulatowski</a>, Senior Lecturer in Philosophy, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-waikato-781">University of Waikato</a> Image credits: Getty Images This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/with-so-many-people-speaking-their-truth-how-do-we-know-what-the-truth-really-is-205388">original article</a>.

Caring

Madeleine McCann's parents speak out after DNA test results

Madeleine McCann's parents have spoken out after the results of Julia Faustyna's DNA test have returned. Julia Faustyna, a 21-year-old Polish woman, has been claiming to be the missing British child in a high-profile campaign that has seen her undergo a DNA test to prove her identity. The DNA results determined that Julia is not Maddie, despite Julia's claims of having similar facial features, suffering an abusive childhood and had starting to question her parentage as a result. Private detective Dr Fia Johansson arranged for Julia to give samples in the US for extensive DNA tests - including a DNA test similar to a 23andMe test, which established she is not Madeleine. The test looked into her heritage, and showed that she is from Poland, with some Lithuanian and Romanian heritage, <a href="https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/21808585/who-julia-wendell-madeleine-mccann/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Sun</a> reported, but nothing to suggest any link to the McCann's. In response, a spokesman for Madeleine’s parents Kate and Gerry McCann said, “There isn’t anything to report at this time. If and when there is, it will come from The Metropolitan Police.” Julia is also facing a nervous wait for the results of further health tests as doctors fear she <a href="https://oversixty.co.nz/news/news/sad-health-news-for-woman-claiming-to-be-madeleine-mccann" target="_blank" rel="noopener">may have leukaemia</a>, Dr Johansson - with Julia’s permission - revealed to The Sun. She said, “Her health is very poor she has bad asthma and she suffers lots of pain in her bones." “She is booked in for a CT and MRI scan because of the pain in her bones." “Her blood work is also abnormal so my doctor here in the US is investigating whether she could have leukaemia so we are awaiting the results of that." “And if she needs any treatment we will make sure she gets that.” Image credits: Getty Images

News

Nigella Lawson speaks on her father’s death for the first time

Celebrity chef Nigella Lawson has shared an update with her social media followers, thanking them for their support following her father’s death. The news of his passing was covered by the BBC and The Guardian on April 4, naming the former conservative chancellor as “one of the most consequential of all post-war UK chancellors”. Nigel Lawson was 91 years old when he passed, with a political career of almost five decades to his name. He served under Margaret Thatcher during the 1980s, holding a number of different roles, before retiring to the backbench in 1992. He went on to sit in the House of Lords until his retirement, just three short months before his passing. Nigel is survived by six children, and it was the 63-year-old Nigella who took to Twitter to express her gratitude to her 2.7 million followers for the love and support being directed to their family in their time of grief, as well as assuring them that while she needed some time, she would return to them. “Thank you for all your kind messages,” she wrote. “And I’ll be back on here properly tomorrow.” <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> Thank you for all your kind messages. And I’ll be back on here properly tomorrow — Nigella Lawson (@Nigella_Lawson) <a href="https://twitter.com/Nigella_Lawson/status/1643303805151240209?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 4, 2023</a></blockquote> “Thinking of you, dearest girl. Your father was always kind and a consummate gentleman whenever I came across him as a journalist,” journalist Pádraig Belton wrote in response, before sharing a brief insight into his experiences with the late Nigel. “Been thinking of you, and Dominic and your kids today. Your dad was an interesting man,” editor Fiammetta Rocco said. “Scary, but very smart.” “Be well. Know that you are loved. Holding you and your family in prayer during this time of loss,” a reverend offered. “Don't rush yourself - give yourself enough time to process it all. Wrap yourself in the good memories & cosset yourself however you choose about the not so good,” one kind supporter advised. “Take care of yourself first - we can all wait.” Nigella wasn’t the only notable figure to note Nigel’s death on social media, with British Prime Minister Rishi Sunak sharing his condolences with his own 1.9 million followers. "One of the first things I did as Chancellor was hang a picture of Nigel Lawson above my desk," he said. "He was a transformational Chancellor and an inspiration to me and many others. My thoughts are with his family and friends at this time." <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> One of the first things I did as Chancellor was hang a picture of Nigel Lawson above my desk. He was a transformational Chancellor and an inspiration to me and many others. My thoughts are with his family and friends at this time. <a href="https://t.co/SPwcnoUFnQ">pic.twitter.com/SPwcnoUFnQ</a> — Rishi Sunak (@RishiSunak) <a href="https://twitter.com/RishiSunak/status/1642988449258160128?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 3, 2023</a></blockquote> And Britain’s former prime minister Boris Johnson also had something to offer, writing that Nigel “was a fearless and original flame of free market Conservatism. He was a tax-cutter and simplifier who helped transform the economic landscape and helped millions of British people achieve their dreams … He was a prophet of Brexit and a lover of continental Europe. He was a giant. “My thoughts and prayers are with his family.” Images: Getty

Caring

Mum speaks out after reaction to cling wrap video

<em style="color: #212529; font-family: -apple-system, 'system-ui', 'Segoe UI', Roboto, 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, sans-serif, 'Apple Color Emoji', 'Segoe UI Emoji', 'Segoe UI Symbol', 'Noto Color Emoji'; font-size: 16px; font-weight: bolder; box-sizing: border-box;">Warning: This article contains disturbing content which some readers may find distressing. A TikTok influencer said her son was temporarily taken from her home by child protection authorities after she <a style="font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, 'Segoe UI', Roboto, Oxygen, Ubuntu, Cantarell, 'Open Sans', 'Helvetica Neue', sans-serif;" href="https://www.oversixty.co.nz/lifestyle/family-pets/mum-slammed-for-cruel-cling-wrap-prank" target="_blank" rel="noopener">posted a video</a> of her husband pushing the child around while he was swaddled from the neck down in cling wrap. The mum, Savannah Glembin, who has 1.1 million followers on TikTok, appeared emotional as she announced in a clip that authorities took her son, Gunner, away following the initial video. “Gunner has been taken from us until CPR can evaluate our home because I posted a video of my husband and son playing," she said. The video of the incident sparked concern among TikTok users, Gunner, who appears to be about two years old, was tightly wrapped in cling wrap while being moved around by his father, Hank. Savannah defended their actions in the video, saying it was “just a funny thing Hank did because Gunner was getting into the stove that day and tried putting a fork in a socket”. Several TikTok users commented how they were left feeling uncomfortable and disturbed by the video, which has since been taken down, with one user @auntkaren0 reposting the video, calling it “feels like abuse”. At one point the boy is placed standing on the bed before he falls forward onto his knees, unable to move his arms as he’s constrained by the cling wrap. “He’s a worm”, his father joked. “If you have a grumpy toddler all day, this is the only way,” the mum is heard saying in the background of the video. Hank, in military uniform, then proceeded to place Gunner face down on the bed before he was flipped over onto his back. User @auntkaren0, who reposted the video, also said, “I don’t see what’s funny here. I don’t understand how putting your toddler in an uncomfortable position is funny and then posting it for views. “Not only did you not just do this for your own entertainment, you thought this was going to be everybody’s entertainment. “This is why I don’t like family channels like this, because they will go to any length for views.” Many other TikTok users shared their concern for the child, one comment said, “My anxiety when he fell forward and I was like omg he’s going to suffocate.” Another comment read, “That gave me anxiety. The feeling of not being able to move! That poor kid.” A third user said, “That gave me anxiety. The feeling of not being able to move! That poor kid.” Addressing the initial video, Savannah appeared tearful, saying, “Right now, we're dealing with a situation where Gunner has been taken from us until CPS can evaluate our home because I posted a video of my husband and son playing. “That video was skewed in a way [that resulted in] people thinking we were abusing our child. But he was laughing and smiling and it was just a funny thing Hank did because Gunner was getting into the stove that day and tried putting a fork in a socket. “Hank playfully wrapped him in cling wrap - he had room to move. He looked like a little worm, like a little cucumber. He was at no point in distress or crying. “We would never hurt our son, we would never hurt our child. He is the best thing that's ever happened to us. “I posted that video two days ago and the response that it had gotten was positive so like I didn't know that someone had thought it was bad until yesterday when cops showed up at our door and separated us, his family. “We went down and made our statements, thinking Gunner was going to be returned to us that day and that CPS would do their investigation and see that our home is safe.” “All I can say is that my son is so loved and cherished. He is my miracle baby, he was my fourth pregnancy after three miscarriages, and he's the light of my life.” She added. “We made a mistake and we don't deserve our child taken away because of it.” The mumfluencer then posted another TikTok that appeared to show the child was back home in the custody of her and her husband. Image credit: TikTok

Legal

“My heart aches”: Mum of young boy who died in Fiji speaks

Amber De Thierry has written an emotional tribute to her 8-year-old son, Cairo Winitana, who passed away in Fiji on Thursday evening. Cairo Winitana and his family were staying at the Club Wyndham Denarau Island report when he was <a href="https://www.oversixty.com.au/news/news/8-year-old-boy-dies-in-suspected-electrocution-while-on-holiday" target="_blank" rel="noopener">found unresponsive</a> in a garden bed. Cairo was rushed to hospital in Nadi, but could not be revived and was pronounced dead by medics. Cairo’s mother, Amber De Thierry, took to social media to confirm her son’s death with an emotional tribute in the wake of his tragic passing. “I loved you my son from the moment I found out I was carrying you and will love you forever more,” she wrote, “my beautiful beautiful blue eyes.” Friends and family flooded Amber’s comment section with their thoughts, love, and condolences in their time of heartbreak. “Sending you so much love and strength my friend,” wrote one. “My heart aches for you our girl. We are here,” added another, “always.” “My heart goes out to you and the whanau,” one said, “I couldn't imagine what you’re all going through. Sending all my love from my whanau to yours.” <iframe style="border: none; overflow: hidden;" src="https://www.facebook.com/plugins/post.php?href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2Famber.dethierry%2Fposts%2F850834649344630%3A850834649344630&show_text=true&width=500" width="500" height="582" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe> The family’s loved ones went on to further offer their support by establishing a GoFundMe page to assist in bringing Cairo’s body home. Cairo was a citizen of New Zealand who was living in Australia with his family - mother Amber, father Clarke Winitana, and his two siblings. “On behalf of our family,” Glenys Wana, the fundraiser’s organiser, wrote, “we humbly invite you to offer support to our family at this devastating time. Our beautiful little boy Cairo, only 8 years old, Loving Son of Amber and Clarke, passed away in a tragic accident whilst on holidays in Fiji. “They now have the heart breaking job of bringing their son home from Fiji and laying him to rest at home in Australia. As you could all imagine this is a very devastating loss for our family, we humbly invite you to offer support for both Amber and Clarke as they navigate through this unimaginable nightmare they are now forced to live with. We all know Clarke and Amber to be the most loving, kind hearted and genuine people.” Police in Fiji previously confirmed that Cairo may have been the victim of an electrocution, and the resort management team have confirmed that they are working with the appropriate authorities to assist with the ongoing investigation into his death. Images: GoFundMe

Caring

Sea World helicopter crash survivors speak out

Survivors of the deadly Sea World helicopter crash that killed four people have spoken out about the tragedy. Elmarie and Riaan Steenberg and Marle and Edward Swart, two couples from New Zealand, were holidaying in Queensland when the helicopter they were travelling in collided with another on January 2nd. Now, weeks after the incident occurred, the couples spoke with 60 Minutes and revealed they are still picking glass out of their bodies. “I just want it out of my body because it reminds (me) of the day,” Ms Steenberg said. Ms Steenberg also shared how she knew they were in “serious trouble” when she saw the other helicopter underneath her. “We thought it’s just a five-minute flight, that’ll be fun,” Mrs Swart said. Her husband added, “What can go wrong?” “I saw the helicopter underneath me, and I knew we were in serious trouble and I actually said, ‘Please, God, help us’,” “And then I heard the explosion,” Ms Steenberg said. <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> When two helicopters collided mid-air at Sea World on the Gold Coast, four friends from NZ never expected their new year's holiday to turn into a disastrous crash. They reflect on the joy of surviving, as well as the guilt and sorrow they have for the lives lost on <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/60Mins?src=hash&ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#60Mins</a>. <a href="https://t.co/MkKFfV6mTW">pic.twitter.com/MkKFfV6mTW</a> — 60 Minutes Australia (@60Mins) <a href="https://twitter.com/60Mins/status/1622172822960226307?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">February 5, 2023</a></blockquote> The couples’ pilot Michael James was at the controls of the other vehicle and managed to land it safely on the sandbank. They were taken to hospital and treated for their injuries and have since returned home to Auckland. Since returning to normal life, Ms Swart said the hardest part of the ordeal is knowing others died and being weighed down by the guilt of survival. "It's the hardest part and it's very real. The question everyday is: why?" “Why did we survive? We’re just ordinary, boring people. Why us, you know? We’re nothing special.” "So yeah, you think about that every day." The pilot of the other helicopter Ash Jenkinson, British tourists Ron and Diane Hughes and Sydney woman Vanessa Tadros were killed in the tragedy. Mrs Tadros’s son Nicholas, 10, was critically injured while Geelong woman Winnie de Silva and her son Leon, nine, suffered serious injuries. Image credits: 60 Minutes

News

"I was aghast": Simon Dorante-Day's sister speaks out against his claims

For several years, Simon Dorante-Day has been claiming to be the love child of King Charles and Queen Consort Camilla. Now, Simon's sister Amanda has spoken out about her adoptive brother's claims and how they devastated their family. Amanda said, "I was aghast when I read it and horrified at the lies, he was using as so-called evidence to support his fantastical claim." "I contacted several family members and friends who knew our family well and they were all as horrified, hurt and upset by his ridiculous claims, lies and allegations, as I was and still am." "Not one of these people believe Simon's story and most of them, once they have gotten over the initial shock of what he has said just laugh at the ridiculousness of it all." Simon has spoken to the press multiple times over the past years to explain how he is pursuing the royal family to get Charles to acknowledge his existence as his son, having never received any of the benefits that come with being the son of a royal. His efforts have stepped up since Charles became King, following Queen Elizabeth II's death in September 2022. Simon has previously detailed a series of medical procedures he claims were performed on him as a child, including changing his eye colour from blue to brown when he was eight and filing two of his teeth at age 15. “These actions I believe were undertaken to conceal my true identity,” he said. In response to these claims, Amanda spoke of how protective her parents were over their children's health, saying, "She thought that if we had so much as a sniffle, if we had hurt ourselves that it would be perceived by them that we were not being cared for properly." "I therefore pose the question - Why on earth does Simon think our parents would have allowed him to have a dangerous eye operation? The simple answer is - It did not happen! I have original family photos which clearly show, even as a very young child, with baby teeth, Simon had brown eyes! Everyone who knows us, knows that Simon's eyes are and always have been brown!" In response to Amanda's statement, Simon said, "Neither King Charles nor his Wife Queen Consort Camilla can take back what has been done in their name to my eyes, teeth, and the years of manipulation, suppression, abuse and lies." Image credits: Facebook

Family & Pets

5 steps to help you speak your mind

Whether it’s at work, with friends, or with your family, saying what you really think often sounds like a bad idea. But holding back from telling people what’s going on in your head can also cause problems, as you are bottling up your emotions and never letting them out. So how do you speak your mind in a way that gets your point across, without hurting people’s feelings or alienating them? Try to remove the emotion This can be tough, but avoid crying or yelling (if you can!) and speak in a calm, clear manner. You are much more likely to get your point across if people can understand you and see that you are talking from a level head. When you act calm, even if you’re not, it makes other people see you as more confident. Shouting often has the opposite effect, as people can begin to tune out to what you are saying. You could try something like ‘I can see that your new girlfriend makes you happy. However I feel that you may be moving too quickly, and I don’t think you should have to stop seeing your friends just because you are dating somebody.’ Use positive words Try to steer clear of extremes like ‘You always…’ or ‘I never…’ Instead, focus on what you would like to happen, and be specific. So instead of ‘You only want to see me when you need me to babysit your children’ you could say ‘I would like to spend one afternoon a week together just the two of us, doing something special.’ Explain both sides It’s easy to get caught up with ‘I’ and ‘me’ when you are getting your point across, but thinking of the other person’s perspective can be very useful for being heard. People naturally think ‘What’s in it for me? Why should I listen to this?’ so tailor your argument towards that. So instead of ‘I think you work too much’ you could say ‘I’m worried that your hours are too long and you are going to get burnt out. We don’t see each other as often as we used to, and I miss spending time with you. How can I help you to see that money isn’t everything?’ Ask yourself what’s the worst that could happen At first you may be too worried about the ‘what ifs’ of speaking your mind. But ask yourself, honestly, what is the very worst thing that could happen if you do? Sure, people might initially feel upset or hurt if what you’re saying hits a nerve, but in the long run most would understand that you were saying how you felt so that you could make things better. Accept that it may not be worth it Sometimes you have to choose your battles, so if you know that speaking your mind will only cause ill-feeling and no good will come of it – let it go. Some things are not worth losing a friend over (like bad lipstick choices) whereas other things are too important to hold in (like issues with drugs or gambling). A good way to decide whether to speak up is to think ‘will anything change if I speak up?’ If not, perhaps let it slide. Image credits: Getty Images

Mind

Brittany Higgins speaks publicly for first time since dropped charges

Content warning: This article includes mentions of sexual assault. Brittany Higgins has spoken publicly for the first time since the charges of sexual assault were dropped against Bruce Lehrmann due to concerns about her mental health. The former Liberal staffer took to social media with her statement about the trial, noting that “the outcome does not affect the truth”. “I chose to speak up,” she began. “To speak up against rape. To speak up against injustice. To speak up and share my experiences with others. “I told the truth - no matter how uncomfortable or how unflattering - to the Court. The outcome does not affect the truth. When I did speak up, I never fully understood our asymmetrical criminal justice system. “But I do now.” Higgins, who testified and was cross-examined during the initial trial while Lehrmann wasn’t, continued to describe the impact of taking sexual assault allegations to court and how alleged offenders aren’t impacted to the same degree. <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/CluKsquhqme/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/CluKsquhqme/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Brittany Higgins (@brittanyhiggins___)</a> </div> </blockquote> “I was requested to tell the truth under oath over a week on the witness stand and was cross-examined at length,” she continued. “He was afforded the choice of staying silent in court. Head down in a notebook, completely detached. “He never faced one question in court about his story or the criminal charges.” She added that surrendered her phones, passwords, photos and other data to the court, a requirement Lehrmann was not made to comply with. “My life was publicly scrutinised, open for the world to see. His was not,” she wrote. Higgins also addressed the scrutiny the media faced for initially referring to the trial as the ‘Higgins trial’, saying that she didn’t blame the media “because to me it is very obvious who is on trial”. “He hasn’t had to be publicly accountable - for his actions of any part of his story,” she continued. “This is the reality of how complainants in sexual assault cases are treated. “Their lives are torn apart, their families and friends called to the witness stand and the accused has the legal right to say absolutely nothing. “Like all women who experience sexual violence, I knew the odds were stacked against me from the outset.” She went on to address the imbalance in Australia’s legal system, citing statistics that said only 16 percent of sexual offences reported to police in the ACT during 2020 led to a charge, with only half of that 16 percent resulting in a conviction. “That is to our national shame,” she wrote. “I want to thank the other women who came forward and shared their own experiences. “I believe you. You were with me every day I walked into that courtroom and faced him.” Higgins also went on to thank those who attended the March 4 Justice rallies, journalists “who helped amplify the issue” and mental health workers, “without whom, I literally would not be here today”. Her statement comes a week after the charges against Lehrmann were dropped and a retrial set for next year was scrapped. The initial trial, which began in October, ended with no verdict due to juror misconduct. If you or someone you know is in need of support as a result of sexual assault or child contact LifeLine on 13 11 14 for immediate support or call 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732 or visit 1800RESPECT.org.au. Image: Getty Images

News

“I believe Prince Andrew”: Fergie’s ex speaks in bombshell interview

Sarah Ferguson’s former partner has made bombshell allegations about Jeffrey Epstein, Prince Andrew and the late Queen, including claims that the convicted sex offender planned to blackmail the monarch. John Bryan, who was in a relationship with Ferguson for four years in the 1990s, made the claims in his first tell-all interview, per The Sun. The US businessman said that Epstein earned some of his wealth by blackmailing others in powerful positions into giving him money in exchange for his silence over their illicit behaviours. “People always ask how Epstein made his money. He was supposed to be this tax wizard. But it was all a con,” Bryan told the Mail on Sunday. “He blackmailed rich men and then made them pay to avoid scandal. He made hundreds of millions of dollars this way.” Bryan also claimed he was secretly drafted for crisis talks with Prince Andrew after the royal’s disastrous 2019 Newsnight interview, including that he was smuggled into the Royal Lodge to advise the royal in the wake of the Epstein scandal and amid claims he had sex with then-teenager Virginia Giuffre. He said the conversation involved probing Andrew about his relationship with Epstein and convicted sex trafficker Ghislaine Maxwell. “Andrew’s television interview had been a catastrophe so they needed an honest strategic plan that everyone could buy into,” Bryan recalled. “[Fergie] invited me to come over. She was desperate. She told me that Andrew was in terrible shape. “He was distraught. They were distraught.” He claimed that he helped the family come up with a “long term strategy” called “House of Kroy”, a backwards spelling of York. During the interview, Bryan said Epstein’s “ultimate” aim was to blackmail the Queen using the allegations of child sexual abuse and other sexual activities made against Andrew. “Epstein tried to lure Andrew into his web, but I believe his ultimate mark was the Queen,” Bryan said, adding that Epstein’s plan to target the Queen supported his belief that the allegations against Andrew were unfounded. “I believe Andrew is innocent. If he genuinely was involved in ‘orgies’ as has been alleged, then Epstein would have used that to try and bribe the Queen into paying out millions to protect her family,” he said. “Andrew has never had any money. The Queen was the one with money. “I truly believe Epstein was going after her but Andrew never gave him the ammunition to do so.” The financial advisor recalled another meeting with the royals, including Andrew, Princess Beatrice, Edoardo Mapelli Mozzi, Princess Eugenie and her husband, Jack Brooksbank. Bryan claimed Princess Beatrice told Andrew, “you’ve hurt our family”, and that Andrew was “downcast” and yelling: “I don’t care anymore, I don’t care. I am being treated unfairly.” He added that the Duke was in a state he had never seen him in before after the interview. “In the four years I dated Sarah I never once heard him raise his voice or lose his temper,” he said. “It showed what strain he was under, how much he cared about the damage this was doing to the Royal Family.” Bryan added that he had only seen Andrew with women aged in their mid-20s while he was dating Fergie, and that he believed there was “no hint” of “anything untoward going on”. “I truly believe if there was anything untoward going on I would have known about it, Sarah would have known about it,” he said. “But there was never a hint of that. I remain and will always remain an outsider, so let me be the first outsider to say that I believe Prince Andrew – and I don’t say it lightly. “This outsider has a lot of inside knowledge.” Image: Getty Images

Legal

Daniel Radcliffe speaks out against J.K. Rowlings's transphobic allegations

Daniel Radcliffe has spoken out about J.K. Rowling amid ongoing transphobic allegations. In a recent interview with IndieWire, the Harry Potter actor claimed he "wouldn't be able to look at himself" if he didn't take a stand against her harmful views. Radcliffe said he felt it was his responsibility to protect his fans from Rowling's rhetoric, while making clear he does not share the same views. He said, “The reason I felt very, very much as though I needed to say something when I did was because, particularly since finishing ‘Potter,’ I’ve met so many queer and trans kids and young people who had a huge amount of identification with ‘Potter’ on that.” “And so seeing them hurt on that day I was like, I wanted them to know that not everybody in the franchise felt that way. And that was really important.” Radcliffe’s letter was aired on the website of The Trevor Project, a non-profit organisation which focuses on suicide prevention efforts in the LGBTQI+ community. “It was really important as I’ve worked with the Trevor Project for more than 10 years, and so I don’t think I would’ve been able to look myself in the mirror had I not said anything,” Radcliffe added. “But it’s not mine to guess what’s going on in someone else’s head.” Rowling, 57, has come under fire numerous times for sharing messages on Twitter of a transphobic nature, which began with a tweet in June 2020, in which she disparaged use of the inclusive term “people who menstruate”. After several trans-exclusionary tweets, Radcliffe decided to share his own message of support, writing a piece addressing the saga, saying “Transgender women are women." “Any statement to the contrary erases the identity and dignity of transgender people and goes against all advice given by professional health care associations who have far more expertise on this subject matter than either Jo [Rowling] or I.” Radcliffe added, “To all the people who now feel that their experience of the [‘Harry Potter’] books has been tarnished or diminished, I am deeply sorry for the pain these comments have caused you." “I really hope that you don’t entirely lose what was valuable in these stories to you.” Image credits: Getty Images

Caring

“Don't ask me how I am”: Cassius Turvey’s mother speaks out

Content warning: This article includes the name and images of a deceased Aboriginal person. The mother of Cassius Turvey, the 15-year-old who was attacked and killed in Perth, has said the flood of generosity and kindness from the public has helped her family heal. The young teen died last month after he was allegedly set upon by a man and beaten with a metal pole while walking home from school. After being taken to Perth’s children’s hospital with head injuries, Cassius suffered a seizure several days later and passed away. In the wake of his death on October 23, rallies will be held calling for change across Australia and internationally on Wednesday, which has been dubbed a National Day of Action. Speaking to <a href="https://9now.nine.com.au/today/cassius-turvey-death-rallies-for-change-held-in-australia-and-internationally/ebd0681b-c656-4b0b-9978-604d8811cb06" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Today</a> on Wednesday, his mother Mechelle Turvey said that the generosity of the public in paying their respects to her son has meant a lot. “It's actually helping us all with our healing day-by-day,” Mechelle said. "The generosity of people wanting to give us things, simple things from hugs to a piece of their artwork, also getting behind the vigils, the rallies as well is absolutely amazing." As a support worker, Mechelle said she is familiar with trauma and that she is trying to be strong while embracing her vulnerability. "I've been telling people, 'Don't ask me how I am', because you haven't got that time to talk about it with me because it will be long," she said. <img src="https://oversixtydev.blob.core.windows.net/media/2022/11/cassius-family.jpg" alt="" width="1280" height="720" /> After the death of 15-year-old Cassius Turvey (left), his family have been met with support from the community through donations, tributes and rallies. Images: GoFundMe Sam May, an older cousin of Cassius who is organising one of the vigils, told the <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2022-11-02/cassius-turvey-collective-grief-ripples-indigenous-community/101597410" target="_blank" rel="noopener">ABC</a> of one of the final conversations he had with his cousin over the phone from a hospital bed in Perth. “He said: ‘I love you my big cuz’,” Mr May said. "My kids would call him uncle … with our kinship and our moiety system, first cousins are pretty much like brothers and sisters, because that's how we are raised. "He was born an uncle and a pop as well, and he was respected by the nephews and nieces who are older than him, just as any uncle. But, he never demanded that respect. He earned it. "And he gave them respect tenfold in return." A GoFundMe page, called <a href="https://www.gofundme.com/f/justiceforcassius" target="_blank" rel="noopener">#justiceforcassius</a>, was set up by Michelle Wighton, one of Cassius’ older cousins to raise funds for funeral costs, as well as “legal costs for criminal compensation and justice” according to the fundraiser site. As of publication, the fundraiser has raised more than double its goal of $250,000, with more than 13,000 people donating a total of $568,357. The man who allegedly attacked Cassius has been charged with murder and is due to return to court on November 9. The full details of the rallies can be found <a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/CkXS6fGhyqs/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">here</a>. Image: Today

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